Why

It / It's - Call me Gold or Red! // NOT a minor // Trying to get back into art again after several years of artblock //

[catasters]

[jinnies-lamps]

this is not AI folk, it is real and it happened in Turkey, it was on the news and you can find videos of this man talking about this cat. This is the link if u are interested in watching it.

[rongzhi]

Problem solving

English added by me :)

[makingtrouble]

It's my cat's birthday (anniversary of me getting him) so I told him the story of his life while petting him real good

Highlights include:

For your first two years (when you were small) you lived in a foster home with people who raised you into a very polite young man. Two is like you plus me, that's what two is.

Some people adopted you before me and they called you Timmy (which is a stupid name) and they returned your ass almost immediately because you were so annoying at that age.

Like think about how annoying you are right now at seven years old, but way worse.

I'm better than them though, I don't call you Timmy and I wore earplugs to bed for three years because you love to scream at bedtime. Earplugs are like when I roll over and go back to sleep even when you are yelling so so so loud.

I got you at a time in my life when I was really sick (being sick is like when I'm up late because I'm throwing up and you are a very handsome good boy who sits with me) and they had to put me asleep for a procedure. A procedure is like what happened to you when they put you asleep and took your balls away.

Now you've lived with me for five years. Five is like the number of toe beans on one of your feet. When I clip your nails five is when we're halfway done. But we're hopefully not even halfway done with how long we get to be together. I'm gonna have to figure out new ways to help you count.

[makingtrouble]

Actually I've decided this is a poem

[lordsmaf]

This? This shit right here? Why Mob Psycho 100 is my favorite anime right now.

[skippyisntfunny]

[bisexual-engineer-girl]

Pulitzer Prize type shit

[wizardshark]

Why's this dude built like crash bandicoot

[spooky-narwhal]

Everything about this damn post is so funny to me. The lighting of the arm from the flash. The posing of the arm like a dramatic death from a novella. The fact the photo somehow got taken still and looks this good. The subreddit name. The fact this guy really is built like crash bandicoot

[great-tweets]

This is the /an/ post that keeps on giving.

[edwardspoonhands]

This is better than anything I’ve ever made.

[d-c-walker-deactivated20200905]

Post that lives in my head rent free

[great-tweets]

Absolutely THRILLED that this post is making the rounds again.

[idhren]

turn on the sound

[trickstertime]

I was thinking about this post last week and didn’t even bother trying to search for it cuz how in the fuck would you describe it in a way that tumblr search would find

[jellogram]

Johnny Eck was a performer from the 1930s who was born without any legs:

He's primarily known for appearing in the 1932 cult classic Freaks directed by Tod Browning.

However what I'm mostly obsessed with is this account of a magic trick he did with his non-disabled twin brother (text under the cut)

Like this is the funniest thing I've ever heard. Can you imagine

Wikipedia screenshot:

"In 1937, Eck and Robert were recruited by the illusionist and hypnotist Rajah Raboid, for his "Miracles of 1937" show. In it they performed a magic feat that amazed audiences. Raboid performed the traditional sawing-a-man-in-half illusion, except with an unexpected twist. At first Robert would pretend to be a member of the audience and heckle the illusionist during his routine, resulting in Robert being called on stage to be sawed in half himself. During the illusion, Robert would then be switched with his twin brother Eck, who played the top half of his body, and a dwarf who played the bottom half, concealed in specially-built pant legs. After seeming to have been sawn off, the legs would suddenly get up and start running away, prompting Eck to jump off the table and start chasing them around the stage, screaming, "Come back!" "I want my legs back!" Sometimes he even chased the legs into the audience. The subsequent reaction was amazing – people would scream and sometimes even flee the theater in terror. As Eck described it, "The men were more frightened than the women – the women couldn't move because the men were walking across their laps, headed for the exit." The act provided the perfect jolt by frightening people at first but then caused just as much laughter and applause. The illusion would end with stage hands plucking up Eck and setting him atop "his" legs and then twirling him off-stage to be replaced by his twin Robert, who would then loudly threaten to sue Raboid and storm out of the theater. Their act was so popular that they played to packed audiences up and down the East Coast."

[teaboot]

Easily one of the top 5 funniest things you can do as an identical twin

[forthegothicheroine]

I like to bring him up when talking at the museum about sideshow stars who were genuinely brilliant performers.

[fuzzygifs]

x

[gremlininho]

looking. at you

[camblogarchive]

nature documentary but the narration is just weird enough to make you question it

[camblogarchive]

“Some fish can walk out of water, so remember that next time.”

[camblogarchive]

“You might think you’re safe, but horses are omnivores”

[toxicglooo]

please watch the round planet on netflix it’s exactly like that 

[ryan-sometimes]

I love how Zohran Mamdani is wearing a suit everywhere. And if he has anything else he puts it ON TOP of the suit. A basketball jersey. A high-vis vest. All worn over the suit. He’s like the mayor character in a cartoon who’s always dressed as The Mayor. If I didn’t know who he was and he biked past me in NYC I’d be like holy shit was that the mayor

[werewolf-transgenderism]

he jumped in a pool in the suit yesterday to celebrate the public pools opening for the summer btw

[yellbug]

addicted to sending this clip from twilight to my friends whenever they are in a situation where i think they should lie

[rubyvroom]

[rubyvroom]

Yeah, it's time to get this post out again

[crazysodomite]

[erratic-meowmeow]

[midnightnautilus]

I haven’t even seen this movie but I need you to see this Letterboxd review of The Housemaid - the discord server I’m in and I have been losing our minds over it

[devpalmer]

military recruiter: so what got you guys interested in the marine corps

enormous horde of hagfish, ispods and bottom-feeding crustaceans: oh. uh. is that how you pronounce it

[devpalmer]

whale fall side of tumblr you understand me

[insearchofsomething]

Is this anything. behold spoilerless propaganda to watch and read witch hat atelier. go. go do it right now. do it