I love English as a subject, I enjoy writing essays
...
But if I have to pretend to feel bad for [early] John Proctor again I think I'll fucking explode

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@luna-chase
I love English as a subject, I enjoy writing essays
...
But if I have to pretend to feel bad for [early] John Proctor again I think I'll fucking explode
I’ve been thinking about how the Crucible intersects with John Proctor is the Villain more, obviously Shelby represents Abigail and Raelynn represents Elizabeth. I’ve been thinking about who Beth could symbolize, at first I thought an early Abigail Williams because of her relationship with Mr. Smith 🤮.
But I reread the crucible a few days ago and see so many parallels between her and Mary Warren that I see both Mary and Beth differently.
The last scene we see Mary Warren in she says “I go your (John Proctor’s) way no more, I love god.” Before going to hug Abigail.
And in the last scene of John Proctor is the Villain Beth stands up to go dance with Shelby, her way of telling Mr. smith she ‘goes his way no more’ similar to Mary.
Also we see how Mr Smith is constantly trying to separate Beth from her friends by giving her attention, typical grooming behavior.
John Proctor does the same this in The Crucible, where he threatens Mary with a multitude of things (like beatings, etc.) in order to force her to testify against her friends in court.
Reading The Crucible with this lense made me see how John Proctor was also grooming Mary, and that (like Mr. smith) there is no way Abigail was the only one.
Arthur Miller had to age up and down John Proctor and Abigail Williams ages to put them in his play. In real life, Abigail was 11-12 years old and John was in his 60's during the actual Salem Witch Trials. To put them into his play he aged Abigail to 17 and John to his 30's.
I can't hate Abigail's character in the play when knowing that she was aged up. In the play she is some troubled girl that is obsessed with John Proctor. His wife had to kick her out because of the infidelity happening under her roof. She has to go home to her uncle who doesn't love her because her parents are dead.
I see Abigail as this girl who was groomed and since John Proctor was the first man to show her any type of attention that wasn't hatred she got hooked on him. She was groomed. It doesn't matter that Miller aged her up to 17. 17 or 12, she got groomed either way. Then at the end it is assumed that Abigail went off to become a prostitute? Are you kidding me?
John Proctor is such a weirdo and I hate that he is painted out to be some martyr because he wouldn't just sign the stupid paper admitting his faults. Getting himself killed and two innocent people. All because he couldn't keep his hands off a 12 year old girl.
👀@reniadeb👀
Signs that he is a RED FLAG🚩🚩🚩
- Can’t recite a certain commandment
- Gets mad at you for bringing up his cheating because he means to please you now
- His ex keeps accusing you of witchcraft because he made some shady “promises”
- The magistrate that sits in his heart judges him
her eyes were the sickly green of the sky before a tornado, and to his horror he discovered she could throw cows around just as easily
to his horror? weak shit. outta my way gayboy im boutta get it
all of our trobles seem so small from up here
Idk why but as a kid I used to get hysterically upset everytime I would imagine a gif of a rotating cow because I could never stop the cow from rotating no matter how hard I tried and I would be crying and no one knew why
This is probably an unnecessary addition, but OCD is missed in cases like these because it's deeply misunderstood by most people.
It's talked about like being obsessively neat or repeating pointless tasks is the main part of it, when really those are just potential symptoms.
The main thing behind OCD is not being about to turn off a thought. There's a thing where most people can just stop thinking about something. If it's over, it's not relevant, it doesn't matter anymore, people can turn their attention away. For OCD, that mechanism can get stuck. And some thought that was supposed to just temporarily pass through your head just stays there. An image of an object rotating. An anxiety about something bad happening. A wish that you made on a dandelion. These are all things that have at some point gotten stuck in my head, sometimes for years at a time.
The compulsions, the rituals, are the person trying to address the thought so it can go away. After all, if you're worried about the door not being locked you can check the lock. But for someone with OCD, that doesn't make the stuck thought go away. So they check it again. And again. And they made a ritual, maybe if I check it exactly five times, I'll know that it's locked and I can let this worry go.
It helps a little. It feels like you're doing something. But it doesn't solve the problem. Actual therapy for OCD involves not doing the compulsion. Instead, you ignore the thought, move around it, try not to give it space in your life. Your mind won't let the thought go normally, so instead you fill yourself with other thoughts. Other parts of your life.
It's not easy at first. Your mind fights you on it. But as you get practice, it gets easier. You learn tricks around your own mind, ways to look at the thought and go, hm. I guess I'll go distract myself now. It does get better. I promise
OCD Heritage Post
i ADORE the anomitinity of tumblr. when i post stupid ass shit from my mush brain on like snapchat or whatever i gotta deal with messages like “are you okay?” and “what does this even mean”. here i can just post 30 pictures of dinosaurs in a row and my followers will be like YEEEEEAAAA BABBY
the other day i posted something on snapchat saying “if we gave monkeys guns i think deforestation would end” and someone sent me a link to an online therapy site i hate it here
i know this really isn't the point but i'm loving the attempt at spelling anonymity
Oh boy Tuesday...
Nothing has aged me into a decomposing wreck quite like witnessing the enshittification of google. I feel like an ancient blathering relic when I hear "what did you do before chatgpt?"
Bitch I had google. I could summon the vast expanse of human knowledge with a few choice keystrokes. I could find recipes made by real human beings, written on unknown blogs because their recipe so closely matched my search terms. I could find entire research papers based off of barely remembered tidbits of them.
But now. The search engine that taught me basic particle physics & niche baking techniques & exposed me to brilliant comic artists & bloggers and more, is now a glorified chat bot.
A thing that hallucinates when its programming indicates that inventing is more efficient than copying. A thing that will amalgamate that vast expanse of human knowledge, which it alone can access, into its ever churning soup, but will no longer take me to the sources directly.
The gateway that used to bring me knowledge is now just a fire hose that sprays bullshit. Feels like watching the Library of Alexandria burn.
Y'all, what Google's doing with their forthcoming mandatory AI portal is not inexplicable. The fundamental conflict of interest of commercial search engines is that they want to keep you browsing the search results for as long as possible in order to maximise their ad revenue, but if you're stuck browsing for too long and never find a result worth clicking through to, you'll just stop using their service. Making the use of conversational AI mandatory means they can at least potentially deliver satisfactory results without ever allowing users to leave Google, and thus capture 100% of the potential ad revenue. This was always the plan.
You read stories about people being unable to accept ageing and crashing out by buying sports cars or pushing themselves too far athletically or whatever but my Refusal To Accept Ageing sticking point is that I just can't accept that I don't like sugar and junk food very much any more. I ate two chocolate muffins this morning and that was 1.75 muffins too many. I'm like "nooo I love sweet desserts I remember being super into sweet desserts" and the memories are from when I was like twelve. I like chicken salad now. I like carrot sticks. I eat carrot sticks and think "wow I'm really indulging today, carrots are one of the more sugary vegetables" and remind myself to make cucumber sticks next time. I bought a capsicum yesterday so that tonight I can eat plain white rice with charred capsicum and onion as a topping and I am genuinely looking forward to it. I MIGHT, if I am feeling adventurous, add a fresh tomato from the garden.
this post made me curious about if there was an evolutionary advantage to kids really liking sugar and sure enough, seems pretty likely! Since adults aren’t actively growing makes sense the favorability for that mellows out.
There are multiple advantages to that, including the "sugar is an excellent source of calories which children desperately need" you mentioned, and also "sweet wild plants are significantly less likely to be poisonous than bitter ones and children who are still learning to gather fruits and leaves are liable to make mistakes".
(You still shouldn't eat unidentified plants even if they are sweet, though. They're still perfectly capable of being poisonous, just less likely. Also for some plants, if you've consumed enough to have an opinion on their taste, you might have already done damage to yourself, though that's not very common.)
I read something that it's that but kind of the inverse. Children, especially when they're very young, are over sensitive to bitter tastes – hence the well known aversion to things like brocoli and other greens –but it's as an evolutionary thing so they're more likely to spit most things out SO THAT they don't eat poisonous things. Hence you kinda have to fight babies to get them to eat most things because their bodies are basically like "you're going to have to be real committed to convincing me this isn't going to kill me" vibes
Attempted killer apprehended for an unrelated assault that someone else committed anyway
If you're still not quite clear on what the article is saying, this woman had a rapidly growing malignant tumor until her doctor poked it with one needle to take a sample.
Her immune cells responded to that tiny little needle wound as they normally would, and only then detected something wrong with the surrounding cells, attacking the cancer they now associated with that trivial damage.
It doesn't reliably work that way all the time or we would have noticed this happening a lot more often, but this would also seem to imply that, across the entire history of the practice, there's probably an above-zero number of people who actually beat cancer through acupuncture.
It’s giving “leeches actually have health benefits but not for any of the reasons they were supposed to be good for”.
Are YOU gonna let THE GOVERNMENT tell YOU what YOUR GENDER is? That doesn't sound like Life Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness to me! PROTECT your individual FREEDOMS and call your senator: we want the GOVERNMENT to stay OUT OF OUR PANTS! GENDER FREEDOM NOW!
Two men in your neighborhood are married... to EACH OTHER? Congratulate them for exercising their AMERICAN RIGHT to follow the footsteps of our FOUNDING FATHERS! They've got a fully AMERICAN spirit of FREEDOM and REBELLION! GOD BLESS THE USA.
Your coworker has a different RELIGION from yours? Well, that's just INTERESTING and you should talk about it on your UNION-APPROVED LUNCH BREAK. The UNITED STATES OF AMERICA was FOUNDED on Freedom of Religion and ANYONE should be allowed to seek the AMERICAN DREAM!
You think someone might be in this GREAT country ILLEGALLY? NO YOU DON'T! No one is in this country illegally! The minute anyone steps on our SOVEREIGN SOIL they're your FELLOW AMERICAN and where they come from is NO ONES BUSINESS.
it's funny yeah, but guys this is actually how you reach the people who prefer these terms to frame all things Good and Correct.
keep thinking about how I wrote in my dissertation about how every time a new form of public/social space emerges it's immediately popular with kids and teenagers who see it as a chance at freedom and then adults colonise it and kick them out. this happened with malls in the 80s and diners in the 50s and pool halls in the 20s. my dad was doing research on this trend in like 1975. and I was like "yeah so this is going to happen to the internet" and then five years later every government suddenly decided to ban kids from everywhere online. I hate being right especially when I don't even get paid for it
as much as I would love for y'all to read my dissertation it would obviously doxx me to post the link/title here, so I probably won't share (unless a longtime mutual messages privately about it). BUT what I can do is tell you about my academic idols - Henry Jenkins, Mimi Ito, and danah boyd - and tell you to go read their stuff, starting with a book they co-wrote called Participatory Culture in a Networked Era
mmmmm blanket pillows teddy bears i sleep now