this is how our man bashir went right

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@martiszcz
this is how our man bashir went right
Loki: [takes a bite out of the Tesseract while maintaining solid eye contact with Thanos]
Thanos: [sweating]
This made me think of this drawing
Fact: The tesseract is crunchy
Perfect way to have distracted him on the ark.
Step 1, make a sugar cube Tesseract.
Step 2 hide sugar cube in a pocket dimension.
Step 3, wait for Thanos.
Step 4, when Thanos asks for it pull out both so he senses the Tesseract and thinks its coming from the sugar cube.
Step 5, CRONCH!
Final step, make sure everyone’s off the ship and use the real Tesseract to GTFO!
Don’t need a sugar version just CRONCH the real thing
Can he still teleport out? If so, that’s an acceptable alternative. Otherwise we have him back at square one and possibly indigestion and that’s just an awkward situation for both parties.
…cronch the tesseract… eat the space stone… become the space stone…
# imagine thanos having to lug loki around everywhere because he IS the space stone # he wouldn’t be able to kill him and everytime he’d be about to do something he’ll turn around and find loki walking away (via. worstloki)
Gamora: And what did it cost?
Loki, handcuffed to Thanos: Five dollars.
Thanos: SHUT UP!
Thanos, lifting his hand to snap: You … should have gone … for the head
Loki, laying face down in the dirt a metre away, mumbling to himself: this is boring and I really need to go to the bathroom
Thanos: JUST HOLD MY HAND!
Loki, entwining their hands: You could at least take me to dinner first
Carol, finding out in endgame: That’s the 2nd time someone’s eaten that thing
Everyone: Wait WHAT???
so I came to a realization while reading some stuff about ozai. bitchlord had the shortest reign of any firelord ever, but that isn’t the funniest thing yet. it was listed that the most notable victories of his reign was the surrender of omashu and the fall of ba sing se.
both of those were led by azula, not ozai. in short, his fourteen year old mentally unstable daughter did more in ozai’s seven year term than ozai ever did.
do what you want with this information. loserlord, indeed.
He didn’t even get the throne on his own, Ursa masterminded the entire coup for him
the tags say no lies
ozai fought two thirteen year olds as a grown man. the first one surrendered. the second one did not surrender and went on to absolutely kick his ass.
These are the bits of fridge logic that warm the heart.
insp.
When you meet Edward Elric he gives off the impression that he's the short-tempered hot-headed "violence is the answer to all life's questions" kind of protagonist, and it's in fact incredible character craft that he's actually the character who ends the series with a negative-3 kill count.
people killed: 0
direct orders of "you really really need to kill this guy" ignored: 1
ongoing murders being committed by Ed's own friends/colleagues that Ed got in the way of to specifically stop that murder from happening: 2
God's worst soldier Edward Elric. Showed up as the youngest member of the Amestrian army, took millions of dollars from them, never followed a single order, helped dismantle their fascist regime, left with a lower kill count than he arrived with, then fucked off to go be a house-husband. Character of all time.
I always thought this was blue fire Azula shot, but it's clear now that it was actually lightning.
In order to prevent Katara from reaching out to Zuko, Azula shot lightning at the ground between them. She didn't shoot it at Zuko despite it would be easily one hit kill.
She said right after: "I'd really rather our family physician look after Little Zuzu if you don't mind."
Of course, Azula will not let Katara heals Zuko; one enemy is down after all. But this proves that Azula’s motivation is to win, not to kill. And that she was motivated by anger not bloodlust (besides of being in the middle of a mental breakdown). It's the same thing with the Southern Raiders entry; when Azula’s anger faded upon seeing Zuko falling but smiled when he appeared again.
People often forget that Azula in Book 2 and 3 was under orders from her father and Fire Lord to kill her "traitor" brother but Azula was often holding back.
In Book 2, she went against "kill on sight" orders to bring him home in the first real opportunity to redeem him in the Fire Lord's eyes.
In Book 3, the Boiling Rock, she refrained from choosing the easy way of cutting off the lines and choose the hard way to fight and defeat the escapees who Zuko (and important others) was among them
Bottom line: "Azula tried to murder Zuko so many times" is an overly exaggerated take. For the context is that Ozai, the Fire Lord, their father was the one to issue orders to kill Zuko and task his child solider daughter with it, however messed-up it is, because Ozai is the one who wants Zuko dead. Meanwhile, Azula doesn't want her brother dead, she was often trying to make the best of the situation she was in, even at her most emotionally/mentally unstable.
I wanted to start my post off with “now I’m not saying Kathryn Janeway would be a bad mother,” but that’s a coward’s equivocation because that’s exactly what I’m saying.
Captain Janeway would be a bad mother. I’m sure any kid she had would adore her, as she did her father, but she’s a high-ranking military official with a known tendency to overwork herself. She is known to sacrifice relationships with important people in her life and has a stubborn habit of believing she’s always in the right (because, admittedly, history has often shown that she is).
I’m sorry, but that woman is not designed to get married, have a baby, and life an idyllic life aboard a starship that allows families. She is designed to show up an hour late to the function bearing ridiculously expensive bottles of wine, ruffle the hair of all the youngsters, and leave at precisely the time considered polite because she has a project she “really should be working on.”
Maybe, when she gets home to her classy Irish residence on the cliff-side, she will spare a moment to gaze wistfully at the Janeway family photo, trace her fingers over the faces of Phoebe’s daughters and think, “Ah, but what if…?”
But that’s IT. That woman ain’t raising any baby she can’t hand over to its legal guardian after a few hours.
Watching Trek in timeline order is honestly so fascinating. I love every single series and I know Trek well but sometimes when you put a series on after not doing a binge recently or watching for awhile you can get a sort of whiplash when your most well know versions of Trek at the earlier ones. And it's not a bad whiplash - not to me anyways - just a "oh giving us Trek differently got it".
But then when you watch the series in timeline order you see the WHY it evolves the way it does. Like, yes we get the "admirality said no so I retired" stuff in PIC but that's weird to fans like why not listen to Picard or Janeway? Your two well known Admirals? But then you watch in order and it's like .... Wow every single year Federation/Starfleet is basically facing annihilation ... Huh? And Picard stepped forward all "hey these guys not asking for our help we should go help them - you know the ones who tried to kill me and all of y'all like six years ago"
And yes, Starfleet/Federation is better than saying no BUT we've seen with the Dominion War that increased security and cynicism is already creeping in. The EMH didn't even gets rights as an individual in his little court case in Voyager - but rights as an AUTHOR. He gets home to Earth and isn't even considered a PERSON still. Yes, he is in Prodigy and then Academy, we don't really know when his rights changed. And given PIC if they did change before Prodigy they likely shifted sometime after as he is a form of synthetic life.
Just, I made a lot of posts in the evolution of Vulcan culture. And dug a bit into Klingon. And really watching in order you see the way so many species shift over time and it's fun to see. But I think what is often overlooked by fans is the shift of Starfleet/Federation and that is because the show is about humanity being better than today. So humanity of the future changing can be uncomfortable when the hope of tomorrow is what we are watching. But the thing is ... Every single show still has the voices of that hope. That no matter what we can and should be better. No matter how bad it gets we can always strive to be better. And that's why I love every show. No matter how cynical Starfleet gets with what is going on, someone is standing right there going "yeah it is hard right now, however". You always got that one character pointing at the stars going "but I wanna go explore, science, look the stars are still bright and tomorrow is still glorious and everything is still breathtaking." And I think thats just beautiful
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Okay but it'd be so funny if Thjazi was looking for a way to avoid the Tachonises but was kind of winging it once he realized he needed to die, and then Julien spat on his body and invoked an old orcish curse, and Thjazi saw his chance like, "You thought my days of being the funniest motherfucker in Aramán were over? Think again, motherfuckers."
On a scale of 1 to the dragon in Merlin how unhelpful are you?
“That is an answer you must seek yourself, my young friend.”