Ammonitte

Multifandom, though currently deep in Dragon Age, Disco Elysium and wrestling hell. She/her is fine. (crow bg by vetiverfox)

[hiveswap]

[Doesnt do it] [gets stressed] [gets scared thinking about doing it] [doesnt do it because it's scary] [keeps not doing it]

[chrissongzzz]

[urbanfantasyinspiration]

Boys will be boys

[were-ralph]

I’ve never been so invested in anything in my life

[royal-random-the-yogurt-queen]

[intimatevoid]

#my buddy over here with the shakiest hands on earth #meanwhile Helmet Greyshirt has the hands of a surgeon and the confidence of Jupiter

via @aturinfortheworse

[shadow-daughter]

Surface tension in action!

[cadaverkeys]

zuko definitely shouldve been allowed to drop just one f-bomb in atla…i think he deserves it.

[cadaverkeys]

thats fucking rough, buddy.

[rudegayslang]

did jet just fucking die?

[aangsslut]

[cloune]

[tropicalcryptid]

SNERK

[blessingsofbabylon]

4 days until wet rat wednesday

[blessingsofbabylon]

3 days until wet rat wednesday

[blessingsofbabylon]

1 day until wet rat wednesday

[blessingsofbabylon]

happy wet rat wednesday

[public-universal-sister]

Despite all my wrath I am still just a rat in a bath

[itsbenedict]

having now watched every 3D animated Barbie movie (don't ask), here is my tier list:

notes:

the top tier is not S tier. the top tier is like "6 or 7 out of 10, by kids' movie standards, if I'm being generous".

"enjoyable elements" usually boil down to a villain who is completely batshit insane and chewing the scenery. sometimes it's "clown plane" or "she always milked the cow her own way" though.

most of these tiers are sorted chronologically, not by quality within the tier. special exception to the bottom tier, which does descend in quality, steeply.

don't. watch. all the barbie movies.

[neosatsuma]

[neosatsuma]

[rain-droplet]

who turned them german mid tag ?

[dastardlywlw]

how do you know they were transformed midday?

[the-actual-ocean]

The Entirety of Tumblr from Tumblr has been Chucked in to the ocean! You're all wet now.

[goldenretriever-boyfriend]

[naamahdarling]

The pissing in the pool website.

[awwww-cute]

[azspot]

“Because the truth is, tech doesn’t have an image problem. It doesn’t have a message problem. It has an intention problem. What’s wrong with the axe murderer who broke into my house is not that he hasn’t successfully persuaded me to buy into his narrative. What’s wrong is that he’s trying to kill me with an axe. Similarly, when you launch a product that’s designed to put millions of people out of work, block access to sources of verifiable truth, replace human creativity with slop, and lower the barriers to every sort of atrocity, the problem isn’t that you haven’t told the public a good story about those things. The problem is that you are trying to do them.”

— The 40 Most Rage-Inducing Problems in Tech

[santhipoma]

[glasshomewrecker]

Everyone should be aware of nitter.net

for any address to twitter you can replace the “x.com” with “nitter.net” and you will be able to browse as if you have an account. Lifesaver.

Similarly, imginn.com works for most Instagram addresses. I still haven’t found one for Facebook.

[doraingrid]

Nightbreeze

[epicsause-official]

i recently found out what the * * * that sometimes separates parts of a text is called and youre never gonna fucking believe it

[fairymascot]

the other day i went with a friend to the museum, and outside its entrance, was greeted with this:

eight cats. sitting there. perfectly still. everyone around them was cooing and taking pictures but those cats did not budge. for a moment i was actually wondering whether that was supposed to be some sort of experimental new performance art.

but then one lady came out of the museum and they all got up and followed after her. good god, i hope they’re her cats. i hope they do this everywhere she goes. just follow after her and patiently wait outside every building she enters like the world’s most disciplined children.

[makingtrouble]

It's my cat's birthday (anniversary of me getting him) so I told him the story of his life while petting him real good

Highlights include:

For your first two years (when you were small) you lived in a foster home with people who raised you into a very polite young man. Two is like you plus me, that's what two is.

Some people adopted you before me and they called you Timmy (which is a stupid name) and they returned your ass almost immediately because you were so annoying at that age.

Like think about how annoying you are right now at seven years old, but way worse.

I'm better than them though, I don't call you Timmy and I wore earplugs to bed for three years because you love to scream at bedtime. Earplugs are like when I roll over and go back to sleep even when you are yelling so so so loud.

I got you at a time in my life when I was really sick (being sick is like when I'm up late because I'm throwing up and you are a very handsome good boy who sits with me) and they had to put me asleep for a procedure. A procedure is like what happened to you when they put you asleep and took your balls away.

Now you've lived with me for five years. Five is like the number of toe beans on one of your feet. When I clip your nails five is when we're halfway done. But we're hopefully not even halfway done with how long we get to be together. I'm gonna have to figure out new ways to help you count.

[makingtrouble]

Actually I've decided this is a poem

[important-cat-pics]

[villapaitalepakko]

ohhhhj the mischevious smiler....

[rorytelling]

A Statistics teacher in Gotham makes a graph comparing times when Bruce Wayne goes on long vacations with times Batman gets beaten up really badly by villains to illustrate to his class how correlation does not equal causation.

[kira-sucks-lawlipops]

Imagine Dick Greyson as a uni student in that lecture, loosing his goddamn mind.

[back-alley-hero]

The students come to the conclusion that Bruce Wayne goes on vacation specifically to beat Batman up.

[aenramsden]

Actually, if I were in that class and not in the know and wanted to find a causative link, I’d have it the other way around. Batman gets hurt, so Bruce Wayne - whose galas and parties regularly get attacked by supervillains that Batman always seems to wind up saving him from - decides to lolnope out of Gotham until the resident superpowered-loony asskicker is back in form.

[dracophile]

Okay, but imagine the professor starting out that lecture, Dick/Jason/Tim/Cass/whichever batkid du jour there sweating bullets…but that’s the professors conclusion, that Bruce Wayne is not dumb enough to stick around when Batman is out of commission, and the kids are just like 

[amerlcanapparel-deactivated2020]

when she says she doesn’t send nudes

[straighthater]

when guys objectify women and expect them to send nudes

[timelordpillbug]

when someone asks you about your nuclear plans for russia

[hikingnerd]

When Russia sends you nudes

[dr-thackery]

[dismantlerepaired]

[ilovepretzelrods]

[thegingerbalrog]

[onwardwall]

[miss-jaxon-flaxon-waxon]

#what the fuck happened here

[her-eyes-dared-me-with-danger]

This is my favorite post in all of tumblr

[kyloschuyler]

reminder that this post is now illegal in Russia

[tree-of-blue-squirrel]

reblog it, because Russia can´t

[maradaisykat]

Thanks Obama 

[my-sisters-eyeball]

Wtf

[roomba-with-knives-taped-to-it]

When Russia makes this post illegal

[earthnicity]

I HAVE ONLY SEEN THIS IN SCREENSHOTS

[dovahdez]

I will reblog this every goddamn time I find it on my dash

[a-wondering-thought-deactivated]

I have a piece of tumblr history on my blog now

[hellsitegenetics]

String identified: atgctactttaatcaaaaattcaTattattatttgaagtcaacatTaaataattgaATCTgtgattaaacttg

Closest match: Bombyx mori BmN4 cell DNA, chromosome 24, sequence Common name: Domestic Silk Moth

(image source)

[willifolts]

When the domestic silk moth sends you nudes

[scp-threats-is-back]

Domestic silk moth is just being friendly

[yoink-a-doink]

Now the moth is banned in Russia

[fantasylover4538]

…well what the fuck is this

[kingofkaumidy2]

Art.

[shower-thoughts-last-responder]

[sodom-hussein]

Old iconic tumblr posts gather gimmick blog comments the way DNA mutations accumulate over time

[starmaker-astral]

This is why I love tumblr

[qqchurch]