Sold My Soul For A Heart of Gold

I realized I have never updated this bio in the 8 years I’ve been on this hellsite. Well here we go: pretty much all the same except I’m 22, bi, and have stopped pretending to like things so other people like me. You can argue with ya mama about your opinions, I truly don’t care. Previous bio: I love music, drawing, writing, and anything to do with the previously mentioned things :)

[ptsdofficial]

i’d like to thank my favorite coping mechanism, masturbation,

[fjordfocused]

Caleb, after describing everybody’s rooms full of emotional tie-backs: and for Beauregard, my truest friend, who is strong of heart and has, statistically, fucked more than any of us,

[adventures-in-anecdotes]

[kineticpenguin]

It is increasingly obvious that most people have no idea how to indicate an illness is slowly killing someone without making them cough up blood. Doesn’t matter what it is or if it has anything to do with your respiratory system, if you’re dying, you’re coughing up blood.

[kineticpenguin]

Writers found out about tuberculosis and were like “damn this slaps” and we’ve been stuck with it ever since

[cheese24k]

[a-crab-called-diz]

oh my god two words in that just UNIVERSAL LANGUAGE

[missgryz-deactivated20130907]

All hope is lost so quickly I can’t stop laughing.

[yung-lizardqueen-deactivated202]

danish tv is the best thing ever

[australiyeahnah-deactivated2015]

“Okay :(”

[thranduilland]

He went straight to Acceptance. He didn’t even go through the five stages of grief. He just started at Acceptance.

[aqueerkettleofish]

I’m working under the theory that he’s able to remain so calm because… it’s not his vehicle. 

[honeylemony]

Welcome to ADHD emotions! Get ready to experience

Understimulation

Overstimulation

The Anger Spiral

Wednesday Forever

Oh God they hate me. This whole Grocery Store hates me.

And *•.~°♪ lust *•.~°♪

[pondering-the-blorbs]

[tiktoksthataregood-ish]

[cyberinfection]

mfw poser “punks” gatekeep being alternative because you don’t agree with their politics 🥺

[pq4]

shut the fuck up i beg

[ding-dong-the-bitch-is-dead]

EXACTLY!!!!

You can't be a conservative or right-wing punk. It's just not done.

[sandersstudies]

Me: oh gosh I need to make this call

My ADHD: hmmm no that task is not accessible at the moment. Want to learn kanji instead?

Me: what? No, I can’t do anything else until I make this call

My ADHD: nothing it is then!

[sandersstudies]

Me: paying this bill is a fairly easy task, it will only take me a few minutes.

My ADHD: see... idk if we can do that right now... but we CAN completely reorganize the pantry :)

Me: why would I do that? I need to pay this bill first

My ADHD: stay refreshing social media for four hours and feeling sad the whole time then :)

[tiktoksthataregood-ish]

[secifosseluce]

as much as the concept of Jesus being a fairly normal lad has its charms, im personally very intrigued by the idea of him being just… extremely weird. not even in a mystical sense, just…….staggeringly BIZZARRE. 

you go to the well to get some water, and here’s Miriam’s boy, staring at the sky, completely still. his expression is unreadable. you hazard a hello and ask how he’s doing, and he slowly, unblinkingly, lowers his gaze on you (he’s 8 and is missing his frontal teeth, not that this is making you any less uncomfortable) and says “I cannot speak of the state of my being, Nathan son of Saul, my brother, but rejoice for the water you shall take today will be as pure as the soul of the children of Heaven”

…you start sweating

[secifosseluce]

normal person in 1st century Nazareth: making my way downtown, walking fast

*sees J boy, 8 yo, staring at you from across the street*

normal person: walking faster 

[secifosseluce]

even funnier, the only person 100% on board with his Prophetic Kid Talk is his mother Miriam, an otherwise placid, absolutely normal woman around 25 or so

kid JC, coming home at twilight, a single white dove following him and chirping with weirdly human-like precision:

 moth̫́er,̦͌ ̮̉i h͙̉av͔̽e ͓͗b̘̃r̞̓o̮͘u̲̒gh̟͒t̺́ you a do̗͐ṽ͙e̢͘ ͈̾m͒͢a͈̽dē̝ ỏ̘f ͈̓c̆͜l͔̂aỷ͇ aṋ̑d̳̿ g͢͞i̹̾fted̖͡ ̻͐it ͓͂w̖̿it̎͜h t̥̃h͙͒e ̨̒m̧̂i̡̍ŗ͒â̫cḷ̔è̤ ̛̻of̞̅ l̘̈i̛̦fè̳

Miriam: ! that’s my little boy :) now let’s go get ready for dinner :) 

her husband Yosef, a carpenter who only marginally got signed up for this: 

[bargains-by-duckface]

This post is so Christian, but it’s the spicy kind of Christian that gets you murdered by other Christians for heresy, so I’m torn.

[secifosseluce]

literally biggest form of compliment i’ve ever gotten

[moonsterm]

that means the angels are babysitters then

[moonsterm]

here have more

[patricia-von-arundel]

You guys really need to read Christopher Moore’s Lamb, if you haven’t.

[frikinnerd]

Always reblog Cryptid Jesus

[moonsterm]

I made more. cause it’s fun

[crap-copper]

I love that you guys used their actual names

[roane72]

I did not consider Eldritch Baby Jesus.

[sirkrabs]

did she lie? no

[moki-dokie]

This is such a millennial/gen x mood holy fuck

[rolledbadinitiative]

I’ll take things that will never happen for $400, Alex.

[gl0wc0r3]

[adeckwith5aces]

Honestly? Same

[virginiaisforhaters]

this is what the inside of my brain look like 

[fromjordyn]

By the time I actually experience mutual love/romance it’s going to send me into shock and fucking kill me

[fluffygif]

Capybara Hydrochoerus

[headspace-hotel]

he fits *sobbing*

[whitepeopletwitter]

[senritsu]

I hate the whole backlash like ‘you say touch starved but you actually just mean horny’ NO I mean when I was getting my hair cut there was a moment where the hairdresser tilted my head to the side and the top of my head brushed his chest and my brain short circuited with endorphins because it thought I was being held