what if our economy was based on disabled people and the elderly getting their basic needs met and not bald white man getting big big big boat
it’s wild to me that people justify otherwise

Andulka
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
occasionally subtle
DEAR READER

#extradirty

pixel skylines

tannertan36
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shark vs the universe
Jules of Nature
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Three Goblin Art
Misplaced Lens Cap
will byers stan first human second

Kiana Khansmith

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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
Keni
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@owlcatsen
what if our economy was based on disabled people and the elderly getting their basic needs met and not bald white man getting big big big boat
it’s wild to me that people justify otherwise
The man behind Serial Experiment Lain's distinctive style, dojin creator turned designer Yoshitoshi ABe defines a sub-cultural undercurrent
everyone shut up kasane teto has achieved her dream from over a decade ago!!!! she has a professional voicebank now!!!!
I'M NOT CRYING YOU'RE CRYING!!! AGUGHSDFka
Shadows don't care about their Living Dolls because of the "coffee"
Okay, so, I've been binging through Shadows House (manga) and I really love it. I love the characters and their interactions, as well as the relationships between the Shadows and their Faces. However, one thing that struck me was that, as taught by the Adults, Shadows should not have any feeling towards their Faces. Faces, known as Living Dolls, are just tools to be used.
But that's not the case at all. In the Children's Wing, we clearly see that many Shadows care deeply over their Faces. Yes, there are exceptions (*coughMiaandSaracough*) but for the most part, Shadows and Dolls have a cordial relationship, especially in the main cast.
This is where the "coffee" comes in.
In the context of the series, "coffee" is the substance the Shadows House uses to control the Faces; it plants an undying loyalty towards the house via brainwashing, and removes them of any individuality. This is something the Faces must take once a week after their debut and in doing so, turns them into Living Dolls. Because of it, the Shadows don't care about them, thinking them as nothing but robots that they can order around and play with.
But when a Doll doesn't have their coffee? That's when things go awry.
Without coffee, the Dolls maintain their personality and humanity. In doing so, they differ greatly from their Shadow masters. But at the same time, this difference is what leads to the Shadows being more thoughtful and caring for them. John (a Shadow) was distraught of Shaun (his Face) when it's found that he was brainwashed via coffee. This is because before that, Shaun wasn't just a Living Doll – he was his caretaker. Shaun feed John his vegetables, Shaun scolds him whenever he messes up despite John being his master. There was familial love between them because of the differences they had.
In contrast, there's Suzanne (the Shadow) and Suzy (the Face). When the bottles of coffee were destroyed, Suzanne was quick to anger against her Face, blaming her for the trouble. However, it immediately backfired when another pointed out that Suzy acted exactly as Suzanne would've. Meaning, Suzy made a decision than Suzanne would do herself, so blaming Suzy is the same as blaming Suzanne. This, of course, frustrates her greatly. Suzanne thinks nothing of Suzy other than a tool, and you don't blame tools for their master's work.
This is even more apparent with the Adults. For children to be adults, the Shadows and Dolls must sync almost perfectly. But if the Shadows and their Faces differ so much in terms of personality, this means the risk of failure is much higher. The "coffee" helps ensure the Faces become nothing but husks that mimic their Shadows, increasing the chances of success. And Adults have shown to not care at all about their Faces, not even bothering to remember their names even though it's almost the same as their own (as shown by Edward).
The "coffee" isn't just a tool for oppression; it's the necessary cog that ensures the society that the Shadows House built stay as it is. Anyone that disagrees, whether Shadow or Face, are disposed of. A Shadow's purpose is to serve the House; it is just as much of a prison to them as it is to the Dolls.
And all of this can only be done because of the coffee making sure the Dolls don't act out of line, and the Shadows mimicking the brainwashed into becoming brainwashed themselves, leading to the Shadows not caring because even the Dolls don't.
The Dolls play a crucial role, maybe even the most vital, in the development of the Shadows. Mess the Doll, you mess the Shadow. But leave them alone? Then you'll have more John/Shaun then Suzanne/Suzy.
Just thought about it, but HGSN plot is like "What if you were experiencing being in love for the first time, and it's unrequited, and your very secret wish – that something happens to make your crush love you back – comes true in the most twisted way possible"
@owlcatsen oh, I meant that Yoshiki is unaware of his feelings for Hikaru being mutual.
When 'Hikaru' said he likes him, his first reaction was "But Hikaru never gave me a reason to think he liked me".
From the flashbacks we can tell that Hikaru did actually give him those reasons (like being very physical with him or jokingly nudging Yoshiki to ask him out). But I think Yoshiki was to self conscious to read those hints and behaviours.
I can only imagine the messy feelings, poor Yoshiki 😔. I hope he gets a happy ending with brainsnatcher Hikaru and can work thru his complicated grief. I'm not really expecting an easy resolution for anyone tho.
Maki-chan is nice
I’m a little late in my time zone, but it’s still December 9th somewhere on this planet. Happy Birthday Maki! I adore this blase lazy chef.
Maki-chan is nice
God I adore this man.
1/3 Porn Anon follow up- thank u 4 the thoughtful response! I have one more thought. I agree, shame is a big factor (just not always the specific shames I mentioned). Which is why, for this population, therapeutic approaches fall short in ways that anonymous programs shine. Therapy is not a place they can be honest and therefore it is not a place they can fully release shame.
2/3 I saw many people in those rooms who had done years of trauma therapy but did not feel relief from shame until having an environment where they could be fully honest + where they could see their humanity reflected back by their peers with similar behaviors (and stop seeing themselves as pure monsters).
3/3 I am very critical of 12 step and ultimately left because of the forms of shame that do get reinforced there. But that addiction framework does provide free, accessible, daily support in a way that builds community, reduces isolation, and helps people gather resources. So I think the risk of chucking the addiction framework completely is more material than ideological, at a time when therapy is so often inaccessible and ineffective in these areas.
Well, so I think several things are all being conflated here. AA and similar programs are freely available in nearly every city or small town in the US, often with a variety of time slots and locations to choose from, it's rooted in a Christian anarchist tradition rooted in generosity, non-hierarchical leadership, and nonjudgement, many people are very vocal about how much they love it and have found it healing, and it promotes a model of addiction that we know from scientific studies tends to not be helpful in a vacuum and does not suit non-Christians very well in some cases.
When people think they are "powerless against their addiction" it often predicts them being more likely to relapse and not to develop strategies for managing their desire to use as effectively. In addition AA promotes some practices such as "making amends" with people you no longer talk to that can be really invasive in the service of making the person doing the amends feel better. And of course while AA and similar programs profess to be for anyone of any faith background, the history and structure and practices are all Christian, and the thumbprints of that are all over it, and that makes it not a safe environment for everyone.
I have warm feelings toward AA type programs and the people that go to them! When I was working as a program evaluator the drug treatment program in the jail I was at (this was over a decade ago, I would not do this job now) was rooted in AA and it was a really supportive environment for many of the guys there, and far better than any other option they had as incarcerated people. I think AA and similar programs helps people make new friends, destigmatizes their experiences, and can be super helpful. But I don't think it's because it's a useful theory or model of addiction. I think AA is really successful in spite of its professed beliefs about what addiction is and how it works. It's the freeness and accessibility and humanity of it all that works amazingly.
I’d be really curious to hear what these anonymous programs are. I’m pretty ignorant about resources here, is anon talking about online forums and chatrooms or are there other platforms environments where people are being able to be totally honest and anonymous about issues related to sexuality and addiction? Either way I would be interested in hearing more about it or being redirected to some of these resources if people know some.
river surfing
Was awestruck when I saw this. So delightful 😍
The trick is not to get hooked on the highs and lows and mistake an activated attachment system for passion or love. Don't let emotional unavailability turn you on.
Amir Levine, Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love
But its so hot 😂. I think it's definitely behind a lot of unrequited pining crushes I had a hard time letting go of and was toxically fixated on. I wonder if there's a way to simulate this in kink.
Delloso De La Rue
[ID: Digital painting of a headshot of Rue from “A Court of Fey and Flowers”. They are a light green owl bear with brown eyes, long eyelashes, and a pale yellow beak. A pink petunia flower crown sits on their head, which is surrounded by a halo of golden light. End ID.]
To the anon who asked about seemingly ‘porn addicted’ people who use porn and masturbation compulsively to deal with trauma: from the description you’ve provided of people who feel horrible about the kinds of porn they watch as well as their trauma histories, it’s kind of impossible for me to believe that shame is not also part of the equation there.
But much as with the examples I listed in the article, I think treating the root issue is again the solution (insofar as porn use is presenting a real impediment or risk in the person’s life that they want to change): treat the trauma, help the person feel more stable and less dissociated, and help them either feel less disturbed by their porn habits or help them develop a suite of other ways of self-regulating when they are triggered, or both, depending on the person’s desires and needs. Porn addiction yet again is not an explanatory framework nor does it offer solutions – if trauma is the problem, treat the trauma, if shame is the problem, treat the shame, and usually someone experiencing one will need support navigating the other as well.
but anon your point about how discussing the biological markers of addiction is kinda beside the point is well made and I hear you on that – I mostly point to that because I know people find it more persuasive/reassuring for a variety of reasons and because it demands the reader consider for themselves what ‘addiction’ actually means. is it a biological substance reliance? or is it a compulsive behavior with a series of social/psychological triggers? or both?
but of course neurobiology is how all human consciousness is instantiated, not necessarily its cause. for the curious, more on this here:
https://devonprice.medium.com/no-mental-illness-isnt-caused-by-chemicals-in-the-brain-1b01d6808871
I also read the medium piece about pornography. This is a topic that’s been unfortunately core to the majority of my life. I’ve tried nofap off and on in a way were I was trying to brute force my way thru adhd with stoic-esque practices of limiting pleasure. This was connected to a broader suite of “dopamine fasting” approaches that framed intense stimulation as addictive in general. These attempts to gain control never lasted for more than a week or two and were always deeply unpleasant, neurotic, and ultimately would leave me feeling dysregulated, out of control, and ashamed. I’m someone who also experienced intense overwhelming shame, confusion and distress about kinks in the porn I consumed, or even in just being attracted to people in general. I think I did view porn as a way to cope with trauma, just in a very unhelpful way that was blended with purity culture and sex negativity where I felt I just needed to show more self-control so I could “not retraumatize myself more”. This “supposed retraumatization” also expanded outwards towards even nonsexual depictions of violence, drama, or horror. My current stance is there ‘s a balance there that’s really individual and social context and resource dependent and that shame isn’t helpful there. My focus on purity is peculiar to me looking back because though I was a conservative christian for a few years as a teen, for the majority of that time I was an atheist actively in therapy. I actually actively sought worldviews that normalized sexuality. I think talking points that shame sex and pleasure outside of conservative spaces are still extremely prevalent, and this is often repeated, intense, and presented as progressive narratives of healing. Definitely something I’m still unpacking and haunts me. It’s nice to see a model of how to grapple with the topic of porn and sex that prizes radical autonomy.
if it sucks hit da bricks <- litany against sunk cost
take it easy but take it <- litany against burnout/apathy cycle
fuck it we ball <- litany against perfectionism
now say something beautiful and true <- litany against irony poisoning
love this
Our Life: Beginning and Always - Game Review
“A nostalgic visual novel where you design your own character and grow from childhood to adulthood with the lonely boy next door. Create an experience that’s all your own in this near-fully customizable, choice-heavy story.”
Our Life: Beginning and Always game follows You throughout your childhood into adulthood. You play through certain situations taking place over four different summers throughout your life and develop your character and your relationships, particularly with the new kid, Cove Holden.
“It’s a wholesome experience that faces large steppingstones of life, while having a focus on familiar everyday moments. With notable amounts of customization for even tiny details, you can enjoy pleasures as simple as having a preferred type of drink and a neighbor who cares enough to remember what it is.”
To quote myself during my initial playthrough, “Wow, I am so gay. This is great.”
I've been looking for a sweet wholesome BL visual novel to play, after No Thank You(18+ game) got my PTSD flared up. Excited to give this a try!
tattoo this on my flesh
I literally had a friend say this the other day while having dinner with him and his husband.
“Listen.” He said. “I served in the military. 10 years in the army, and had to keep my mouth shut and pretend. I had to pretend to everyone, until I just got sick of it and decided fuck you all. I haven’t been nice in years. Everyone saying I should shut up can kiss my ass.”
If people wanted nice gay people they should have been nicer to them.
IF PEOPLE WANTED NICE GAY PEOPLE THEY SHOULD HAVE BEEN NICER TO THEM
IF PEOPLE WANTED
NICE GAY PEOPLE THEY SHOULD HAVE
BEEN NICER TO THEM
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
My people pleasing gay ass aspires to obtain some of this energy.
✨Just Autism Things✨
Everything has context. Nothing can be said without all the context it needs. And not saying all the context feels physically painful. You won’t feel completely understood until all the context is said and accepted. Otherwise you’re misunderstood. And you’re so tired of being chronically misunderstood.
Unless you’re talking to another autistic with an interest in the subject and you don’t need to cover context all the time because you speak the same language. 🥰
This is why fandom spaces are generally safe, and a safe place to delve even deeper and be encouraged in the deep dive.
This is so relatable. I feel like I've oftentimes been dismissed and seen as annoying because of my tendency to explain things this way. And finding supportive communities really does make a huge difference.