Shadow The Hedgehog Is A Bitch Ass Motherfucker

[omtai]

She literally does not give a damn what that old fool is yelling about

[unaloid]

the lion does not concern herself with papa

[geologyingeneral]

[frank-bennedetto]

Ok I looked this up and the discription is half true but not in the way you would think. The fossil is a real example of a Stupendemys geographicus, a pre historical turtle species that could grow to the size size of a small car. The man however is misidentified. "Carlos" is actually Dr. Rodolfo Sánchez, Director of the Paleontological Institute and Museum at the University of Zurich in Sweden, who was the team leader of the paleontologists that found the fossil.

[x]

[harocat]

Rodolfo for scale

[todaysbird]

The standard unit of measurement: one Dr. Rodolfo Sánchez.

[teaboot]

Dr. Rodolfo For Scale

[theconcealedweapon]

[sludge-wizard]

[t4timekeeper]

[boytransmission]

would you consider yourself an intelligent and sensitive pervert?

i've been saving this in my inbox for months because i don't feel like i have the words to match this. it's a shameful breach of my humility to answer yes, yes i do consider myself an intelligent and sensitive pervert. i love how you worded that. this is like a therapist's screening question.

[skoggybear]

[theconcealedweapon]

[2peachy]

[motherfucker-somewhat-limited]

[theweirdwideweb]

[sexchangedotcom]

"tumblr's the only social media without algorithms!" "you can still be anonymous on tumblr!" "tumblr's so nice because you don't have to show your face!" WRONG tumblr is special because you can have 3000 followers and still get an average of seven likes a post. i'm doing stand up comedy at a packed venue and one person is laughing

[dungeonlust]

[sca-nerd]

I took my nephew and niece to their first event when they were… five and seven? They each picked out a heavy and a rapier fighter to cheer on (we made favors for them to give as part of the Plan to Keep Little Kids Entertained™). They interpreted this to mean that they were to LOOK AFTER these fighters and spent the remainder of the day taking them water and sharing goldfish crackers with them.

You don’t know happiness until you see a little kid hand a Knight an Uncrustable and have him devour it gratefully.

[ruffboi-mags]

#congrats your children reinvented squires (via @roach-works​)

[cherubg1rl]

[socialistexan]

Oh.

We're at "traffic tickets are justification for disappearing people off the street and sending them to death camps with no due process" levels of fascism now.

Okay yeah we're like fucked, fucked.

[impishglee]

“nothing tastes as good as skinny feels”

damn you must suck at cooking. check out some youtube tutorials man. i believe in you.

[jarfieid]

I had to take a piss test for a job I got hired at today, and this is the name of the fuckin company that makes the tests

[jooshthepunished-deactivated202]

[skopostheorie]

Can't decide whether it's funnier to say "my hungry ass could never work at a" and then say something that implies you're eating something truly grotesque or something that just, makes no sense

[skopostheorie]

"my hungry ass could never be a brain surgeon" awful. 10/10

"my hungry ass could never be a truck driver" ????? 10/10

[yanoharuhito]

EATYIGNIN TIJOK;L'HE????

[see-the-wires]

[naamahdarling]

You're right, that would be shocking.