I wonder what that marriage proposal felt like on Rosie’s end. She’s like “enough faffing around - I want to move in together.”
and Sam’s like, “ah, well. THE THING IS. I actually have to move in with Frodo first.”
And Rosie’s like: “I need a timeline.”
And Sam’s like: “Iiiiiiiii… seewhatyoumean. I have to go do forestry, though.”
And Rosie’s like: “ok but you’re a gardener.”
And he’s like: “I’m diversifying! Got my chainsaw license. Doing a course about coppicing.” As he shuffles shiftily out the door.
This whole time, a genuinely ill Frodo is living in Rosie’s actual house. Sam moves back in with his grandfather, but Frodo lives with Rosie, her brothers and her father, who are all caring for him. A fascinating move there from Sam. Park your boyfriend with your girlfriend and move back in with Gaffer! That certainly simplifies everything and definitely delays any timeline conversations that your boyfriend and girlfriend are trying to have. CAN’T TALK NOW. ER. RESTORING NATIVE HEDGEROW.
While Sam is off pretending that topiary techniques totally apply to woodland management, Frodo has a massive relapse - WHILE LIVING IN ROSIE’s HOUSE!! Rosie’s DAD discovers him and deals with it! The Cottons must have THE HIGHEST tolerance for messy polycule drama. And apparently they all join forces with Frodo in keeping this from Sam.
Pippin and Merry come with a moving van and forcibly restore redecorate Frodo’s house, which must’ve been fun for them, and I hope they took some initiative in the matter of colours, paint, etc. Somebody clearly had to. I’m glad it was them. I hope THEY talked to Rosie about it. I hope she designed the damn place.
And THEN the house is ready and Frodo’s like, “Sam! WHEN are you moving in with me.”
YOU’RE LIVING IN HIS FIANCÉE’s HOUSE!!!!
No WONDER you get a sense of Rosie being slightly impatient about all this. Sam fucks off to do tree surgery and has given no actual timeline! He proposes so badly that his best friend, who lives with Rosie, didn’t even realise they were engaged! Frodo’s just living with Rosie (which is fine, you’re fine, Frodo, dw about it) but, like, what are we doing, when is Frodo moving out, WHAT IS THE PLAN, SAM.
And Frodo and Sam are like 💖💖💖💖💖 what if we lived together! Yay! 🎉
Rosie must’ve been like. FRODO AND I. ALREADY. LIVE. TOGETHER. WHOSE HOUSE ARE YOU IN RIGHT NOW —
“Rosie, you can be mistress of Bag End!”
WELL. BULLY FOR ME, GOOD THING I ALREADY DECORATED IT.
“We can get married ASAP! I mean it, ASAP.”
“There should be enough room that it won’t be weird.”
I HAVE BEEN LIVING WITH FRODO FOR MONTHS. WHO DO YOU THINK DOES HIS LAUNDRY AND STOPS HIM SLEEPWALKING.
“Has Frodo been sleepwalking?!”
Anyway, I see you, Rosie Cotton. Nice job bagging two charming husbands and a cool house. Sorry about everything you had to go through though.
