~hello it me

30 she/her

[goodnightngoth]

me: sorry i’ve been busy

me for the last hours:

[dogsandphilosophers]

Can anyone recommend some entry level behaviours? Thinking of getting into being

[mysillycomics]

how to have a sturgeon summer:

1. be quite large

2. use your barbels to find prey among the gravel along the bottom of the river

3. extend your siphon-like mouth to eat small fish, shellfish, and crustaceans

4. launch yourself out of the water and make a big splash just for fun

5. show off them scutes!

you can now enjoy your sturgeon summer

[yeehawlw]

can you trigger tag ‘lesbians’ please

no but i can hit you with my car

[pauljpeg]

I wish all the pee came out in one go like a shotgun blast

[dovv]

[shrimpkidd]

[equius]

you just dont get this on other websites

[gremlininho]

let me. innnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

[dailycatsblog]

[were--ralph]

Tweet of the year

[learningfromlosing]

SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LOOK AT MY KITTEN IN MY SLIPPY

[kittybroker]

slippy kitty now sliding in for only $2.99!

[lovesodeepandwideandwell]

I dislike the violence and unpredictability of the ice dispenser

[pure]

Squidward is an aristocratic gay black man who vogues old way because he’s cultured, Spongebob is a twink from the Dominican Republic, Patrick is an anglo saxon bear who doesn’t wash after the gym

[inber]

let's struggle to dine with mama

[phallusmagnificus]

his fish too big for his goddamn he

[vanguard]

"don't post that, what if an employer sees?" personally i think employers need to stay the fuck off their employees' social media lmao

[vanguard]

stop normalizing employers invading employees' privacy ❤️❤️❤️

[throathole]

I really love when cats use their front legs to hold something in place while they use their back legs to kick the absolute shit out of it

[throathole]

Destruction. Annihilation, even

[deadpowol]

[tahthetrickster]

[wyrmicelli]

me tongue-deep in a sandalwood candle: 🤤

the tjmaxx employee loading a fourth tranquilizer dart into their blowgun: i need backup

[snowown]

[tigersharks]

[glewmie]