Dank Memes and Revelations

I'll never let you go if you promise not to fade away…

[tolerateit]

women in STEM (shitty posture, tired all the time, eyebags, miserable)

[buzzfeed]

[ficcyshit]

s t o p

[stellarvisionary]

[asombodyinanobodytown-deactivat]

this is a cursed post because of that ^

[dont-taunt-the-octopus]

me: [at work, ringing up two parents and their toddler who’s sitting in the cart trying to get their attention]

toddler, quietly, waving hands around: [incomprehensible]

mom: what?

toddler, even quieter: [incomprehensible]

dad: you gotta speak up, bud

toddler, at full volume: FUCK.

[girl-esque]

this actually made me laugh out loud

[date-a-jew-suggestions]

If you would report an undocumented immigrant to ICE you would have reported me to the Nazis and I don’t fucking trust you

[prismatic-bell]

A note:

I live in a state where you “have to” report anyone you suspect of being undocumented (that wonderful hellhole of Arizona). Now in practice this law has fallen far short, thank goodness. But if you live in such a place and they start enforcing it, here is how you get around it:

Assume everyone who doesn’t speak English is visiting.

Never ask about their job, because if they tell you they work here then you know they’re not visiting. You see them a lot for several weeks or months? Hm. Someone in the family must be ill. That’s terribly tough. They always dress in old, ratty laborers’ clothes? I feel you, my dude, I can’t afford new clothes either, and my dad has the fashion sense of an aardvark, so sometimes it’s not even about “affording” them. They say they’ve been here for years? You must have misunderstood. Spanish isn’t your first language, after all. First and last name? It never came up, or you don’t recall–you meet a lot of people.

And then, if you’re asked: no, you haven’t seen anyone residing illegally in the United States. Just people visiting.

[date-a-jew-suggestions]

Very good very important addition

[copperbadge]

A good sign to find hanging above any doorway.

[jumpingjacktrash]

i think we should just start using this sign instead of ‘exit’

[ruinedchildhood]

Mulan (1998)

[krabby-kronicle]

[neverthere12345]

[mambatron]

LMFAO. Chill man

[placentalmammal-deactivated2017]

i had a dream that the latest meme was attributing all human achievement to a little league baseball team. like “wow, the pyramids of giza are stunning! those boys sure are talented, building pyramids to raise money for their trip to regionals!”

“its really incredible that the redhawks synthesized penicillin and invented vaccination. not as incredible as their 12-2 season record, though!”

[bisexualpiratequeen]

that’d be a pretty good meme

[sarahseeandersen]

[frogmunist-deactivated20190724]

Legend

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

not japanese so maybe I'm outta line here but ... is saying smth is certainly japanese bc of the aura alone racist?

i was basing it on the fact japan has produced, among other things

square watermelons

a long egg

alcohol and tobacco vending machines

a rabbit island created by secret government experiments 

and for no conceivable reason, a penis festival. 

if it was a white guy holding a glazed donut hamburger w/ a side of deep fried twinkies, i would take a wild guess and say that emits an ominously american aura 

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

i’m crying, it turns out the photo this ask was about

is in fact japanese. 

called it.

Chindōgu (n.): The Japanese art of inventing gadgets that are seemingly useful but too absurd to actually use.

[gif87a-com]

[nadiaoxford]

I don’t know a word of Korean, but I love how I can tell the chat is clearly cracking up at this.

[robotlyra]

“LOL I’M DRIVING” is a universal experience

[ohhdannyboi]

_

[rawr-booklover]

OMG

[unexplained-events]

Researchers have used Easter Island Moai replicas to show how they might have been “walked” to where they are displayed.

VIDEO

[smileforthehigh-deactivated2017]

Finally. People need to realize aliens aren’t the answer for everything (when they use it to erase poc civilizations and how smart they were)

[desiremyblack]

(via TumbleOn)

[pearlsnapbutton]

What’s really wild is that the native people literally told the Europeans “they walked” when asked how the statues were moved. The Europeans were like “lol these backwards heathens and their fairy tales guess it’s gonna always be a mystery!”

[kiwianaroha]

Maori told Europeans that kiore were native rats and no one believed them until DNA tests proved it

And the Iroquois told Europeans that squirels showed them how to tap maple syrup and no one believed them until they caught it on video

[theopensea]

Oral history from various First Nations tribes in the Pacific Northwest contained stories about a massive earthquake/tsunami hitting the coast, but no one listened to them until scientists discovered physical evidence of quakes from the Cascadia fault line.

[thegirlthewolfate]

Roopkund Lake AKA “Skeleton Lake” in the Himalayas in India is eerie because it was discovered with hundreds of skeletal remains and for the life of them researchers couldn’t figure out what it was that killed them. For decades the “mystery” went unsolved.

Until they finally payed closer attention to local songs and legend that all essentially said “Yah the Goddess Nanda Devi got mad and sent huge heave stones down to kill them”. That was consistent with huge contusions found all on their neck and shoulders and the weather patterns of the area, which are prone to huge & inevitably deadly goddamn hailstones. https://www.facebook.com/atlasobscura/videos/10154065247212728/

Literally these legends were past down for over a thousand years and it still took researched 50 to “figure out” the “mystery”. 🙄

[archaeologistforhire]

Adding to this, the Inuit communities in Nunavut KNEW where both the wrecks of the HMS Erebus and HMS Terror were literally the entire time but Europeans/white people didn’t even bother consulting them about either ship until like…last year. 

“Inuit traditional knowledge was critical to the discovery of both ships, she pointed out, offering the Canadian government a powerful demonstration of what can be achieved when Inuit voices are included in the process.

In contrast, the tragic fate of the 129 men on the Franklin expedition hints at the high cost of marginalising those who best know the area and its history.

“If Inuit had been consulted 200 years ago and asked for their traditional knowledge – this is our backyard – those two wrecks would have been found, lives would have been saved. I’m confident of that,” she said. “But they believed their civilization was superior and that was their undoing.”

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2016/sep/16/inuit-canada-britain-shipwreck-hms-terror-nunavut

“Oh yeah, I heard a lot of stories about Terror, the ships, but I guess Parks Canada don’t listen to people,” Kogvik said. “They just ignore Inuit stories about the Terror ship.”

Schimnowski said the crew had also heard stories about people on the land seeing the silhouette of a masted ship at sunset.

“The community knew about this for many, many years. It’s hard for people to stop and actually listen … especially people from the South.”

 http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/north/sammy-kogvik-hms-terror-franklin-1.3763653

[crazythingsfromhistory]

Indigenous Australians have had stories about giant kangaroos and wombats for thousands of years, and European settlers just kinda assumed they were myths. Cut to more recently when evidence of megafauna was discovered, giant versions of Australian animals that died out 41 000 years ago.

Similarly, scientists have been stumped about how native Palm trees got to a valley in the middle of Australia, and it wasn’t until a few years ago that someone did DNA testing and concluded that seeds had been carried there from the north around 30 000 years ago… aaand someone pointed out that Indigenous people have had stories about gods from the north carrying the seeds to a valley in the central desert.

[fluffmugger]

oh man let me tell you about Indigenous Australian myths - the framework they use (with multi-generational checking that’s unique on the planet, meaning there’s no drifting or mutation of the story, seriously they are hardcore about maintaining integrity) means that we literally have multiple first-hand accounts of life and the ecosystem before the end of the last ice age

it’s literally the oldest accurate oral history of the world.  

Now consider this: most people consider the start of recorded history to be with  the Sumerians and the Early Dynastic period of the Egyptians.  So around 3500 BCE, or five and a half thousand years ago These highly accurate Aboriginal oral histories originate from twenty thousand years ago at least

[ironbite4]

Ain’t it amazing what white people consider history and what they don’t?

[gluklixhe]

I always said disservice is done to oral traditions and myth when you take them literally. Ancient people were not stupid.

[ameliaglitter]

I saw this and thought of @fleamontpotter.

[justicewitch]

OP HOW CAN YOU NOT ADD THE BEST PART OF THIS TWEET THREAD

[catchymemes]

Conditional Immortality of Lobsters