imagine if i did my work. if i sat down and Did it. and it was Done. can you even imagine such a thing
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@rainonthegumleaves
imagine if i did my work. if i sat down and Did it. and it was Done. can you even imagine such a thing
This is wild.
they need to come up with more words like necrosis and miasma and mausoleum and cadaver and morose and decrepit and stuff like that just so metal bands can expand their vocabulary
*coughs blood* youre all just jealous of my wound. yuore trying to make me get rid of it because you wish you had a wound this cool
i would like to officially thank sesame for its seeds, its oil, and of course its street
bullying the apple-deficient girl
Mouse belongs to @duckroulette<3
it's good and cute when girls have horns
having the Aviation Accident Investigations Autism™️ has actually done wonders for the way I process and respond to my own fuck-ups
And I don't just mean "oh, my little work mistake is actually nothing compared to a fiery crash that kills people," either. The reason commercial flight is so many orders of magnitude safer than any other form of transportation is because after every accident and incident, an independent regulatory body investigated it with the express goal of figuring out exactly what happened, why, and how to prevent the same thing from ever happening again—not to root out which person deserved the blame or the liability.
It's a simple, shockingly effective idea. It's also worlds away from how most people approach their own mistakes and the mistakes of others.
Because it’s never just one person’s fault. And even when it is, it still isn’t.
The sharpest, best-trained pilots make worse decisions when they're tired or sick or stressed out, so there's two of them. The most dedicated and experienced air traffic controllers garble an instruction over the radio sometimes, so pilots are trained to always repeat clearances back to catch misunderstandings quickly. The best and brightest maintenance mechanic still overlooks a screw or misconnects a wire once or twice in her career, so aircraft systems are built with two or three or four layers of redundancy, and pilots are exhaustively trained to deal with failures safely.
Everyone eventually has a bad day. Every component breaks down. Every computer gets a bad a Windows update and spirals into a reboot doom loop. If it’s possible for one person’s mistake to domino into a mushroom cloud of a fuckup, then that task is too critical to be one person's sole responsibility. The accident sequence starts with the design of the system—so how do you improve the system to keep it from happening again?
oh yeah. The “modern commercial aviation is the safest form of transport” thing only applies to planes, btw. A helicopter is a beautiful metal horse that wants to break its legs and die so so so badly
Why is public sex so hot 😫😫
Climate change.
Why do you blog?
Honor
Glory
Duty
Justice
”spam like = block” yeah ok buddy. when i wake up to tumblr notifs of someone spam liking my stuff i start giggling and kicking my feet
you've heard of "quiet quitting," now I'd like to introduce you to the next level, The French Work Ethic:
Do exactly what you're paid for and nothing more
Absolutely refuse to be available to contact when you're off the clock
Never prioritize work over your own health, wellbeing, or family because that would be insane, it's just a job.
Have a little glass of wine
Take as long as you feel like for lunch
Deeply understand that work doesn't matter
Make sure your boss your boss knows they're always your second priority ❤️
🗣️ Hey, young Americans:
Old Millennial American speaking here. I need you to adopt this mentality as early as possible and hold to it. The older you get, the harder it is to begin this practice and claw back the extremely unhealthy effects of a workaholic lifestyle. I am speaking from 20 years of experience.
This does not mean having a shitty attitude at work, or not doing your job, or relying on co-workers to carry your water.
This means you do what it says above. It also means not making work and productively your entire personality; not tying your productivity to your value; and not becoming so emotionally enmeshed in your work and workplace so that you are living and dying by what happens there.
Good luck out there. American workplace culture is mostly designed to work you to death. Moving against that tide can be challenging, so having a healthy mindset is important to living a life not consumed by your paid labor.
“we live in an uncaring universe” yeah dude and I live in an uncaring house. and I shit in an uncaring toilet. but do you touch an uncaring lover? do you comfort an uncaring child? do you guide to sleep each night a cold and uncaring self?
please hurry up in reblogging this I wanna jorts it before someone puts it in one of those heartwarming tiktok slideshows
i was like 'what could jorts it possibly mean' but as with many things clicking the original post immediately clarified the situation
ok so this would be my vision for the cigarette cake x
I made this, and it's cooling right now. Just realized I accidentally ONLY did oreo bits instead of "cut with caramel".
(I'm super proud that I made this, please reblog <3)
I made another; Dad wanted it for his birthday.
Sure, here's my disorganized recipe from hell, cobbled together from various websites and experiments. I just realized that I pasted the caramel and pastry cream in the wrong order... It's easier if you make the pastry cream first and clean that pot for the caramel. I'm on mobile. Will fix.
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1 box white cake mix, using egg whites. Bake. Flip onto a wire rack.
2/3 box spice cake mix (save the rest to turn into batter later, or portion the batter and bake it on the side.) I add extra allspice. Bake in previous pan.
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Caramel Ganache (kinda):
1 cup granulated sugar
⅓ cup butter, salted or unsalted
White chocolate and hot milk ganache (pre-prepare or don't; pour hot milk over the chocolate and stir until thick but fluid consistency. Use the same method over dark chocolate to make a separate, thicker ganache for later).
Heat until fully melted and amber, without burning. People say don't stir the sugar; I don't think it matters much for a cake like this and I stir it to help it melt faster after it has started.
Add the butter pieces and stir until smooth. It's gonna look scary. Just keep going.
Add the white chocolate ganache until reaching desired consistency. This is done now. Transfer to a holding container and immediately wash your pot. Filling the pot with water and letting the leftover scuz simmer on low helps.
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Pastry Cream (it's just custard with butter, apparently) (ALSO NOTE: I never have a ton unless I make a thin tall cake, but this amount offers an appropriate texture. Maybe double this exclusively if you can make it look pretty. IMO, I'd turn this into a mousse to stabilize it, but I haven't. Spicetrekkers Walnut Espresso Blondie has a good custard->mousse setup.)
▢ 2 cups whole milk
▢ ¼ cup granulated sugar
▢ 1 large egg
▢ 2 large egg yolks
▢ ¼ cup cornstarch
▢ ⅓ cup granulated sugar
▢ 2 tablespoons unsalted butter
▢ 1 teaspoon vanilla extract (or vanilla bean, split open, to add to the milk during heating)
In a medium saucepan, combine milk and granulated sugar. Gentle simmer/steam. Do not boil.
Whisk together 1 large egg, 2 large egg yolks, ¼ cup cornstarch, and ⅓ cup granulated sugar in a mixing bowl until smooth and pale.
Slowly pour about half of the hot milk into the egg mixture in a steady stream, whisking constantly to temper the eggs and prevent curdling.
Immediately pour the tempered egg mixture back into the saucepan. Return to medium heat and whisk constantly until the mixture thickens and begins to bubble, about 2 to 3 minutes.
Remove from heat. Stir in 2 tablespoons unsalted butter and 1 teaspoon vanilla extract until fully melted and incorporated.
Transfer the pastry cream to a clean bowl. Press plastic wrap directly onto the surface to prevent a skin from forming. Refrigerate until completely chilled (can use freezer initially, if you want).
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Layer as per image. Layer as follows:
Spice cake → Caramel ganache → White cake → Plain pastry cream → Pastry cream with add-ins → Dark chocolate ganache with oreos if you want it that way → Crushed biscoff cookies
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It is very reminiscent of a typical Southern dump-cake, but if you organized it. It's fun. With work, it could be kind of classy?
If I had enough free-time, I'd change a lot about the layering. The caramel and spicecake is fantastic, but the pastry cream doesn't layer perfectly with the white cake. If it was up to future-me, I'd make round cakes, and stack the white in 2-3 layers with the caramelly cookie cream, and coat the entire thing in chocolate ganache (with a little espresso powder). This would do great with coconut and/or almond in a form of preference, too.
I'm so horny I could fuck a person I was attracted to #TRUE