raventown

it's too much pressure

[raventownn]

blondies!

#sp #southpark #kenny #marjorine #tweek

[raventownn]

they're preteens who, in order to make some money, open a pet sitting service

[raventownn]

I have the theory that each slytherin needs a ravenclaw and each ravenclaw needs a slytherin in their lives 🐍🦅

[raventownn]

Gryffindor common room but it's golden hour ✨

[raventownn]

Gryffindor common room but it's golden hour ✨

[raventownn]

ok but listen up...

A Marauders' series starring Cory Gruter-Andrew as Remus "Moony" Lupin and Finn Wolfhard as Sirius "Padfoot" Black.

[scorpiusdraco]

SCORPIUS FLIRTING WITH ALBUS THEN PANICKING WHEN HE REALISES PLEASEEEEEEEEEE

[emmaiwatson]

[feketeribizli]

when draco accidentally befriended luna lovegood during his post-war eight year at hogwarts (plus their dumbass lovers)

[raventownn]

(headcanon)

Lily Evans was the first one of her year that could invoke a embodied patronus, a beautiful and strong doe.

So both, James and Severus had the same patronuses as her because they were completely in love with Lily, with the difference that Potter's patronus was a stag while Snape's was the same doe as Evan's.

This may be because despite the fact that James really cared and loved Lily with his whole heart, he still had another passions, another friends, an own personality. On the other hand, Severus didn't have other purpose in life more than love Lily, protect her and lately ""take care"" of her son.

So yeah, Lily didn't have the same patronus as James, James had the same patronus as Lily.

And Severus needed therapy.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

i like the sistine chapel ceiling a lot better now that i know it was painted by a gay man who was motivated entirely by spite

[i-should-be-making-homework]

Wait… whaaaaaaaaat? Where can I find the story behind this?!

[dragonimpal67]

Lol, here’s how my art teacher explained it:

The pope went to an artist, saying “We want you to paint the Sistine Chapel”. 

At the time, one did not simply say “No” to the fucking Pope. But this artist really didn’t fucking want to do it. So, clever little cookie goes “Dude I’d love to, but I’m unworthy of such an honor! You know who’s an even better painter? Fucking Michelangelo! Go check him out!” 

So, the Pope trots his little ass over to see Michelangelo and straight up tells him “I want you to paint the Sistine Chapel, and what’s his face said you’re the fucking best in the whole wide world.”

Now, Michelangelo, is one of the few people who would genuinely have been sassy enough to tell the Pope to go fuck himself. Besides, his true passion lies in sculpture, not in painting. Don’t get me wrong, he’s good at it, but he likes sculpting more. And just like the clever cookie artist, he knows that painting the Sistine Chapel is going to be a bitch. But he said yes. Why, you ask?

Pride.

If he turned the pope down, it would be as good as saying he actually wasn’t the bestest in the whole wide world and like fuck he was going to let that stand! So, he spent the next several years painting the Sistine Chapel, bitching about it to anyone who would listen (seriously, the letters that he wrote are fucking gold!), and attaining new levels of pettiness never before seen! 

There are cherubs doing hand signs that were (at the time) the equivalent of flipping the bird. He painted a great big picture of the gates of hell right behind where the Pope’s chair would sit! And so much more!

Michelangelo had exactly zero shits to give by the time he was done painting that fucker.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

someone post the letters & cherubs

[romantic-void]

Those are the cherubs, and in the second picture there are the gates of hell.

The guy on the right, the one with the snake biting his private parts, is actually a cardinal that was angry at Michelangelo!

And, just so you know, all the people in the picture were painted naked. Then, after Michelangelo’s death, the pope listened to the cardinal and he asked to a painter to add the clothes.

[olivescreech]

ALSO; The skin of Saint Bartholemew has Michealangelo’s face on it because he felt as though he was being skinned alive because painting the chapel was such a BITCH

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

this man was every level of gay pettiness oh my goodness

[official-lucifers-child]

SOME MORE STUFF:

so 3 of the 4 ninja turtle artists were all connected in this drama in some way, michelangelo, leonardo da vinci, and raphael

the asshat who sent the pope to him for the ceiling job? fucking bramante, the artist of st. peter’s basilica. his apprentice was raphael, and bramante thought that michelangelo would fail the painting and then raphael could sweep in and save the day because guess what? raphael was talented as FUCK and if he was able to do a better job than THE michelangelo? he would have a path straight to being Rich and Famous and michelangelo would’ve been humiliated and never taken seriously again

all of the ninja turtles were gay as fuck, and this is relevant bc raphael was painting the pope’s meeting room/study at the same time as michelangelo was painting the ceiling of the chapel, and one day lil raphael thought “hey i’ll go see what’s going on with mikey and see how bad he’s doing” but SIKE BITCH, michelangelo was doing a fucking FANTASTIC job so raphael went back to the study that he was painting and added michelangelo’s face in it despite the painting being of the philosophers of old. raphael was a petty gay bitch but he knew talent when he saw it and michelangelo had talent and gained raphael’s respect

michelangelo was also a petty gay bitch and he painted tons of people naked which was Bad and Inappropriate but he refused to cover them up so the pope then got a bunch of other dudes to paint robes and towels and shit covering up the genitals which is why there are so many people with half-assed cloth over their crotches (see: the dude holding the skin of st. Bartholomew)

the painting raphael did? it’s not anything little, it’s this fucking masterpiece we all know and love

it was no small thing that raphael did, and he is clearly a fucking amazing artist

bramante, the original dude, hated michelangelo because michelangelo knew leonardo da vinci and they both called each other out all the fucking time and bramante was a friend of leonardo’s and didn’t like this so yeah he’s also a petty gay bitch

michelangelo never knew this was all a setup for him to fail, but he didn’t fail so good for him

random: michelangelo spent so long painting the ceiling in such an awkward position with his head bent back and to the side to look up that he was permanently disabled in a hunched position. the sistine chapel job did a bad number on his neck and back

so yeah, 1500s drama is fucking hilarious, here’s a small article on this but ignore the last paragraph about raphael going back to his own work and “scraping it off the wall”, the work they’re referring to is the one shown above and all he did to it was add in michelangelo because he’s a gay bitch in love he respected the hell out of michelangelo and admitted that he was doing a fucking awesome job with the sistine chapel

hope you enjoyed this bunch of random knowledge that i do not know how i came across knowing but i do

[iwillsithereandtrytocontribute]

This just in: all the artists of the Renaissance (including the writers) are just petty gay bitches.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

you don’t know what petty means until you’re a gay artist forced to accept major commissions from the roman catholic church 

[hazeldomain]

The church: so what are you going to paint?

Michelangelo: cocks. Just. So many cocks. On everything.

The church:….

Michelangelo (still trying to get out of it): cocks or no deal

[haikuubot]

Michelangelo

(still trying to get out of

it): cocks or no deal

[insumptua]

oh my god this post gets better

[raventownn]

ok but listen up...

A Marauders' series starring Cory Gruter-Andrew as Remus "Moony" Lupin and Finn Wolfhard as Sirius "Padfoot" Black.

[fangirling-20-deactivated202012]

2020

Friendly remainder that 2020 was the year Albus and Scorpius decided to fuck shit up.

Explains a lot really.

[jwirthdreams]

Not gonna lie, the first time I read the Cursed Child I had a fit of rage, but…a thing will grow on you when it’s your only cannon content serving that sweet, sweet “Albus the Grump” & “Scorpius the awkward-cinnamon-bun-nerd” action. 

So wholesome.

I need to sleep

[b4ssbr3aker]

We need a cringy ass romcom where the two main characters are our iconic local lesbian and her himbo best friend. The main female love interest catches himbo boy's attention so initially local lesbian becomes his wingman but then they both end up hopelessly chasing after the girl. While all this is happening there is another chick that goes almost completely unnoticed who is head over hills for local lesbian but hides it until local lesbian gets heart-wrenchingly shut down by the love interest and she finds her way to mystery girl as a last resort. The mystery girl is trying to give hints that she's interested but local lesbian is completely oblivious and gets a case of dumb gay bitch disease, but himbo boy takes notice of the hints and tries to tell local lesbian that mystery girl is hitting on her but local lesbian dismisses it and is like, "How would you know, you're a dingus". The mystery girl and local lesbian start hanging out to what local lesbian thinks is platonic but after a while, mystery girl changes that by confessing her feelings for her and they share a big, cliché movie kiss. Himbo and love interest on the other hand, they do have some sort of relationship but they find they have differences so they become friends with benefits and that goes on for another 5 years (while local lesbian and mystery girl are starting a happy family of cats) and himbo and love interest get sick of hooking up all the time so they try to commit to a long term relationship. The local lesbian and himbo drift away from eachother to prioritise their partners. Another 5 years go by, local lesbian and himbo both have families but they're in unhappy relationships so they break up with their partners. They get all down in the dumps because they have no one else to go to until they magically meet eachother at a cafe and himbo and local lesbian rekindle their friendship, becoming platonically closer than they ever were before.

[hecthledgers-deactivated2020112]

Long, time ago in a galaxy far, far away… 

[teatraysandtypewriters]

When Harry becomes the DADA professor, kids constantly ask him for an autograph, but he refuses, saying the only thing he’ll autograph is a detention slip. Eventually, though, he starts carrying around a stack of autographed pictures of Ginny, which he gives out when people ask for an autograph. It gets really popular, so he starts mixing it up with autographs from other people, mostly Ron and Hermione. But the students love it, so he adds more. Soon he’s giving out autographs from like fifty different people, including all the teachers at Hogwarts, and a bunch of other random people like Luna, Lee Jordan, Oliver Wood, etc. He even has some fairly rare ones from Krum and Fleur. It becomes a game in Hogwarts to collect all the autographs, like chocolate frog cards. Some of them are more limited edition than others, like signatures from all the ghosts (though Harry won’t reveal how he managed to get those). George starts to offer a discount at Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes (and a prize autograph from Peeves, who will only sign Bertie Bott’s scratch-and-sniff cards) to anyone who can prove they’ve collected the whole set. Harry provides him with up-to-date lists of autographs to check against. Every Hogsmeade weekend there’s a line of Hogwarts students in WWW’s Hogsmeade branch trying to get the discount.

At some point a seventh year comes up to Harry and asks for his autograph, but not as the Savior of the Wizarding World, but because they now have the autograph of every other Hogwarts teacher and want Professor Potter’s to go with them. Harry–trying not to tear up–agrees, but only in exchange for the student’s signature. He begins offering this deal to all departing seventh years, his autograph in exchange for theirs. He tells them it’s in case they ever get famous, so he can add it as a limited edition autograph, but really he keeps them all in a big binder just for himself, to remember all his students. (A couple times, though, when a students does become famous, he will contact them and ask if they’d like to be added to the game. So far no one has said no.)

When Teddy starts at Hogwarts he begins a black market autograph trade because he has access to a lot of the people Harry gets autographs from. Harry’s other three children proudly continue the trade when they get to Hogwarts. They’re all secretly aided by Ginny.