amorphous

24| queer| my heated rivalry blog is for ME and im shouting at the world | main is alex

[fistfights]

People are so quick to forget that Shane and Ilya are two jocks who plays a violent contact sport and fuck nasty about it lol

[jesterlesbian]

Hudson Williams and Connor Storrie drawn by Zoe Si for The New Yorker

[gaynehollander]

I think Shane coming hands free the first time he was fucked genuinely made Ilya feel insane. Like, here is your league-mandated rival, he skates like a god, he has the media eating out of the palm of his hand, he commands the room without even seeming to realise his power, he is fucking gorgeous, he drops to his knees at the slightest prompting, he moans like a whore, and, oh! he also fucking spurts all over himself just from having your dick in his ass. Have fun trying to content yourself with fucking literally anyone else for the rest of your life!

[russianblush]

#happypridemonth

[annabelle--cane]

sometimes someone I follow falls victim to severe Character delirium to the point where they stop even saying the character's name and just refer to them by an epithet like some kind of malevolent entity whom they don't wish to accidentally summon, so if the sickness sets in quickly enough and I don't pay close attention for a week I'm just Never going to figure Who this bastard haunting my friend Actually Is. and I'll spend months scrolling my dash occasionally seeing appeals to "that fucking horse" or "my evil grub."

[lemeduartes]

Canada Shane Hollander

[eemolu]

the idea that hollander "tamed" rozanov is really funny to shane because like. ilya finds it hot and is always going along with it, yes of course my husband is so sexy why do you think i moved to this boring fucking city. for dick. meanwhile shane knows the truth which is that ilya tamed himself. he herded shane like a sheepdog until he was exactly in the right position for ilya to flop down at his feet and say i love you, i am a one man guy, sleep with other people if you want but you are it for me, so shane is always there like ??? ilya. what are you talking about. i was literally prepared to be a secret slot on your roster for the rest of time without even admitting that i was gay until you decided to have me over make me lunch and say my name while you come like a love confession and ilya goes lyubmiyy. shut up. i was untamable you tamed the untamable and so shane has to be like yes, baby, i worked so hard, i used all my tricks but he's rolling his eyes because ilya wants to be a wolf shane coaxed inside to sleep on the hearth but instead he's a cat who snuck through the window and fell in love with his prey. self domesticated. and this is just one of the many perfect games they play

[wtf-is-hockey]

If a reporter ever asked Ilya what his thoughts were on some semi popular hockey hobbyist podcaster, YouTuber, influencer whatever’s latest beef with him that’s been blowing up on social media and inspiring gossip throughout the league, Ilya would respond “Who?” just to piss them off and make it seem like he is so unconcerned with what they’ve said about him he doesn’t even know about it. If Shane was ever in the same situation he would also respond “Who?” but because he sincerely doesn’t know and Ilya would unironically think Shane is so cool for this.

[madrasaur]

bellboy mr shane hollander at your service!

[catalpa-waltz]

Here is fucking view hollander check it out!!!!

[loontattoo]

Hahaha yeah that’s just connie from admin. she got a little wild at the staff holiday party. classic connie

[russianblush]

a night out in roku city

[sabotage-on-mercury]

They won't change their last names officially but Shane and Ilya very much have a "what is mine is yours, what is yours is mine" attitude to it.

They arrive at a restaurant, Ilya leading Shane inside, smoothly telling the maître d': "We he have a reservation for Hollander."  "Of course. Would you let me show you to your table, Mr. and Mr. Hollander." And Ilya looks so proud and so happy and Shane squeezes his hand tightly.

Ilya wants them to have new bespoke suits for the NHL awards, he got a rec for that hidden gem of a Québécois tailor, and makes Shane call him. Shane rolls his eyes, they have enough suits yet he indulges his husband. He stares at Ilya across the room when he calls and says. "J'ai besoin un rendez-vous pour deux personnes. Oui. Mon nom est Rozanov." Shane only notices after ending the call, blushing slightly, but Ilya comes sauntering towards him, grinning like the cat that ate the canary. "Oh, Mr. Rozanov it is, I see. Maybe we should swap."

They go on a family vacation together with David and Yuna and Ilya introduces them with "We are the Hollanders" to all the other hotel guests.

Shane introducing them as "We are Shane and Ilya Rozanov." to the new neighbours.

It's exciting and comfortable at the same time these little moments of being so openly married, of being seen a family together, and for this it really doesn't matter which name they use.

[fractally]

I think at some point one of the Cens is asking Troy like why he did all that and Troy is like "Well you know hurt people hurt people...I was really struggling with being closeted at the time....I know it was wrong but I was trying my best"

and Shane's eyebrow twitches and he goes "yeah I get it. Some people work through the closet by being rampaging monsters to everyone around them and some people work through it by winning three Stanley cups"

[kaijuerotica]

ilya in the pool final form

[gasolinewillmakeitgofaster]

I cannot stress this enough, but Shane Hollander has a perfect backhand shot and Ilya was teasing him. Shane Hollander is fast and has an incredible backhand. Please stop writing fics where Ilya thinks his backhand sucks. He is in awe of Shane’s skill and Shane knows that. Please. I beg.

[kaijuerotica]

[text: #(jake what's a backhand)]

it's when you pass/shoot the puck with the backside of the stick blade. they're curved for control so you usually use it so it cups the puck like o) but instead you're using it like o(

[lavenderprose]

There's never been a fandom ghost like Cliff Marleau. He's a vampire. He's an ally. He's a latent bisexual. He a little confused but he got the spirit. He's imprinted on Ilya like a duckling. He has three sisters, all of them lesbians. He is 42. He is 28. He's French Canadian. He's from Florida. He is being psychosexually tormented by his best friend's thot husband. He is Hollanov's platonic third. He has a beautiful, terrifying wife. He's made out with Ilya but they were in Paris it's chill. Of course he's slept with men he's a fucking hockey player. He is Ilya's ex-husband.

[hunybody]

the eleventh hour promise cliff marleau makes where he says Roz listen to me man Listen if it goes tits up in canada because you uprooted your life for some bitch i’ve never met—and nobody has ever met by the way—no don’t walk away. tell you what dude we’ll both trade to florida. Alright? you have an escape hatch you’re not trapped brother you say the fucking word and we are back on line together coronas in hand. fucking call whenever and i’m there i’ve got my agent on it let me know and i’ll pull trig