Lawyer: How would you like to handle the custody agreement?
Parent: I want my wife to take one of my infant daughters to the UK and I’ll take the other one and we will never see each other again.
Lawyer: You want to fucking what?
occasionally subtle

⁂
NASA
cherry valley forever
Today's Document
Mike Driver

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
we're not kids anymore.
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Xuebing Du
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

JVL
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Claire Keane
will byers stan first human second
styofa doing anything
tumblr dot com

titsay
Monterey Bay Aquarium

PR's Tumblrdome

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@sarahgarlic
Lawyer: How would you like to handle the custody agreement?
Parent: I want my wife to take one of my infant daughters to the UK and I’ll take the other one and we will never see each other again.
Lawyer: You want to fucking what?
developing the hots for ryan gosling because of project hail mary is so fucking embarrassing I swear to god. that is a conventionally attractive man. a noted hollywood heartthrob. he's even blond, are you kidding me? did he win people magazine's sexiest man alive? I don't know. I'm not going to check but it wouldn't surprise me at this point. it's such a mainstream taste. such a clichéd celebrity crush. like oh I fancy ryan gosling and my favourite drink is coca-cola and my favourite snack is ready salted crisps. jesus christ. 'b-b-but i only like him when he's in a science pun tshirt and playing a dorky-awkward loner type!' doesn't matter. he's still ryan 'ken from barbie' gosling. it's so trite. I feel like the weird nerd girl in a teen coming-of-age romcom falling for the super popular jock. don't I know that I have a reputation to uphold here? cringe.
This post is the spiritual successor to that post about David Corenswet:
via
Sometimes my dad likes to put little pills in my food. And in those pills is more of the food.
good morning soft sad freaks on an unprofitable website
look dude me transforming painfully into a centipede isnt a fetish thing its for work. Can you take a pictyre for my linkedin its starting hherggghh
Hollywood archaeology: Secret treasure! Hidden maps! Ancient tombs!
Actual archaeology:
so I wanted to find a picture of the lobster and
behold! an archaeologist
There are many benefits to being a marine archeologist
I love this post especially the rat part
going on me feed
what do you mean there are exactly zero rats i. this post
These guys would be the biggest hit at any Renaissance fair they went to.
An envoy from a kingdom in the far East comes to your hamlet and of course you give them a warm welcome!
Do you have any idea what access to the spice road would do for the tiny Dukedom of Fairground By the Budget Hilton?
these are the people you have to share a highway with
genuinely what is the alternative here
also i cropped the image but the thing they were using as an example was the nut allergy in Hereditary
i do NOT write for myself i write for the eleven year old girl walking circles on the playground making up stories in her head and muttering the dialogue out loud. i see you girl. that stick you found DOES look like a cool dagger.