if i was a bird i'd be a bird

28｜she/her｜i dungeon, i dragon, and sometimes i art

[el-garito-deactivated20210126]

El ventilador, mola 👌😃  

[yeahiwasintheshit]

Gay sex is becoming more and more complicated

[starwarsgraphictee]

Go! Starmie!

[delphinidin4]

alysontabbitha on IG

[nerdygaykitten-deactivated20210]

[anexperimentallife]

Ah yes, the band made up entirely of lifelong political activists, and which contains at least one Harvard Political Science honors graduate, should "stay out of politics" lmao. Anyone who didn't realize RATM has ALWAYS been political has obviously never paid attention to their lyrics.

[vstheworld]

the only thing funnier is that this is the second time in the past year that RATM fans are discovering what the machine is like do y’all just not listen to the words or

[theworsethingsgettheharderifight]

i thought they were just Florence haters 😔

[anexperimentallife]

Now I want a Florence and RATM collaboration project called "Florence Against the Machine."

[erinlace-deactivated20200503]

[bone-and-brawn]

[official-lucifers-child]

no no that’s a bop, i love it

[flightyfinch]

“Woman!” cried I, somewhat tearsome,

“Who are you to stand so fearsome

With your wavy locks of auburn hair and eyes of emerald green?”

Quoth the woman, “I’m Jolene”

[perplexedhedgehog]

@lauralot89

[mockwa]

☻unmute☻

[armadillo-dreaming]

[Video: a construction worker shoveling dirt as children on the other side of the fence yell “YAY!” every time dirt is moved.]

[officialmacgyver2-deactivated20]

Often I am struck with the child like desire to just dig a hole. Kids love to dig holes.

[jaehaerys1]

Kids have a pure admiration for blue collar workers. Garbage truck drivers, construction workers, fire fighters, etc. They appreciate and respect these people more than grown ass adults do.

[sunnysimone]

[goatrodeo72-deactivated20221113]

#goals. I too want to be strong like bitch who fights bears in the forest!

[headspace-hotel]

she has her priorities straight

[babyfairy]

justin bieber having traction alopecia from his disgusting matted “””dreadlocks””” is about to send me over the edge

[babyfairy]

?.?$:&:&:@?!€++€~€}€{!|!€€{££{!~..,?,,?

[toastpotent-deactivated20250619]

[ladistark]

same expression and everything

[teamjacobthot]

[teamjacobthot]

@t-e-reynolds ok so boom

smeyer wakes up from a vivid dream on june 2, 2003

smeyer’s dream inspires her to write twilight

twilight gets published (2005) and the books and movies become a global phenomenon

e.l. james writes a bdsm twilight fanfic titled master of the universe

master of the universe is later published as fifty shades of grey (2011)

the fifty shades book series becomes wildly popular

fifty shades of grey gets adapted into a movie (2015), in which dakota johnson is cast as protagonist anastasia steele in her breakthrough role

the fifty shades movie series also becomes wildly popular and dakota johnson’s acting career takes off

dakota goes on ellen degeneres’s talk show, where ellen tries to play dakota for a fool and dakota shuts that shit down

people start noticing that ellen has a tendency to make her celeb guests feel very uncomfortable and is terrible to her employees

ellen makes the decision to end her talk show in 2022 after 19 years

[xenosagaepisodeone]

Submerging an Italian in olive oil like you would an Evangelion pilot in LCL so they can operate at maximum psychological capacity

[santa-destroy-deactivated202211]

this is what my bellisima mama did to me when i was but a six year old little bambine and now im so unbelievably fucked up

[pileofknives]

“what do you mean you wouldn’t personify your state as a hot young MILF with sweet perky milkers?!”

[pileofknives]

Iowa said “come get y'all juice!”

[felderwin]

This website would be so funny in the death note universe I think some of you guys would be really pro Kira

[felderwin]

Imagining discourse where some people are reminding you not to put your name and face on your blog to stay safe and then other people call you toxic and abusive for that bc it means you’re hiding something if you don’t want Kira to be able to kill you

[direhuman]

me explaining to the other trainers that apricorns are unknown outside of Johto because of deliberate suppression by the Silph and Devon corporations to present artificial pokeballs as the only means of capturing pokemon and establish regional monopolies after they eliminate renewable sources

[theinsidiousdice]

(via @itsbenedict)

[itsbenedict]

eternalfarnham replied to your post

you’re in the pocket of Big Ball, I see

there’s no pocket for me to BE in, there’s no LOBBYING involved, there’s no SUPPRESSION campaign because you don’t need one! traditional methods suppress themselves when you make modern pokéballs available. you might as well start accusing AT&T of deliberately suppressing the noble traditional art form of the goddamn semaphore.

not to mention OP demonstrates a total lack of understanding of the market realities of the pokéball industry- Silph and Devon are not monopolies, if they weren’t in constant competition their magic monster domination spheres wouldn’t cost two bucks a pop. the ball spec is a public standard, and Bill Masaki’s storage system based on that standard is an open-source project. they’re only the two largest players because they’re able to leverage economies of scale. you still get smaller operations like the Laverre City Poké Ball Factory, with better regional supply chains and local brand recognition, making room for themselves in the market. 

sm FUCKING h at y’all granola-crunching conspiracy theorists. you probably also believe Super Potions cause autism.

[justisdevan]

Ok, but it is a shame that artisanal balls are basically off the market now. Like, you have to ride the monorail and hike through a half dozen routes just to find someone willing to sell you a Fast Ball. Believe me, when your boss at the power plant needs five Electrodes by Tuesday you are not going to want to make the trip to Alola; you’re going to head on down to the Mart and get some Ultra Balls, which will do the trick but aren’t well tailored to the job.

I’m with you that modern catching techniques are better, not to mention more humane, but there genuinely is a loss from more niche balls becoming harder to find. Maybe someday the long slowpoketail of consumer demand will be met, but I wouldn’t hold my breath for that Shellder.

[cetaceanhandiwork]

look y’all are missing the point. mass production of silph balls crowding out traditional apricorn craftsmanship is, if anything, more a side effect of the real problem: that capture artifacts are too easy to get your hands on these days. $2 basic balls are a problem. before modern ball tech you had to go to an artisan, yes, but part of their job was to care about who had the power to recruit pokémon from the wild, as a backstop against another Knight of Veilstone coming along. there was a time when you’d never lay a hand on a ball yourself until it was clear you respected pokémon, whether tame or in the wild. but now, a “pokémon journey” is open to practically every teenager, even if they’ve got not interest in treating their team with trust and love.

the worldwide rise in the last century of organized crime and apocalyptic cults who use pokémon as their muscle is a direct result of capture artifacts becoming a mass produced market commodity rather than a mechanism for preserving the sacred trust between humans and the wilderness. it’s a miracle that the powder keg hasn’t already gone off by now.

[eternalfarnham]

Oh that is rank historical revisionism - what, do you think artisans’ definitions of “respect” were constructed in a vacuum? We already had rhetoric as far back as the warring states period in Ransei about how only the soldierly classes, overwhelmingly descendants of nobility and taught from birth, had the intangible qualities necessary to “bond” with Pokémon. And when we start seeing apricorn balls develop in Johto, which borders Kanto - Kanto, where we know there’s been extensive cultural cross-contamination with Auroran and Dragnoran expeditions - surprise, suddenly only a small population has the intangible qualities necessary to use them, too.

That notion was, and remains, a tool to limit general access to Pokémon in the interest of maintaining class disparities. I mean, have we already forgotten the Aether Foundation’s pseudo-conservationist nonsense? Their attempt to manipulate natural resources and establish a power base in Alola, while they were modernizing and taking their place on the world stage, was founded on this exact rhetoric of “rescuing” Pokémon from local disenfranchised populations, as if taking Pokémon away from places like Po Town would improve things instead of increasing competition between trainers and decreasing safety.

Do you want more disillusioned kids joining gangs? Because that’s how you get Teams!

[sindri42]

Artisanal balls and anyone who supports them are tools of the aristocracy to suppress the common folk. In the days when a ball could only be made by hand by an expert, only the wealthiest could afford pokemon, and as a result anyone not born into the “elites” was forced to be subservient to their “betters” for protection.

The release of the $2 pokeball meant that the balance of power shifted to the common citizens. If any child can wield the power of a god, the military and the government and the wealthiest businessmen have no power over them.

More than that, instead of power being determined by the wealth to acquire pokemon, power comes exclusively from the dedication, effort, and empathy required to train them to high levels and to maintain their loyalty. If a person simply buys their pokemon, then those pokemon will either stay at low levels forever, or refuse to obey the human because there is no respect between them; the most powerful people in the world are those who caught a critter at level 2-5 and then devoted their life to raising it into a world power.

And as a beautiful side benefit of this, standard of living has increased across the board. Since every household has at least one minor pokemon in the family and there are increasing numbers of professional, working pokemon joining cities and other civilized areas and working to improve them, every aspect of economy and industry has been enhanced by their supernatural capabilities. Electricity is generated cleanly and in abundance for everybody. Pollution is cleaned up almost completely and instantly. The production of farms, mines, and workshops is multiplied, even as safety standards improve. Yes, every few years another potential apocalypse comes about and needs to be prevented by a couple of brave teenagers, but outside of those incidents the world is damn close to utopia.

[6qubed]

…that was all fascinating to read and I would like to see more like it, please

for instance; what the hell is in lemonade that makes it a more powerful healing alternative to regular potions

[suinicide]

Opium

[lemondorp]

See, unlike in the real world, the Pokémon world has yet to ban cocaine in drinks.

[antique-scarecrow]

this website is INCREDIBLE

[nevertheless-moving]

[tally-art-deactivated20201005]

Only the subtlest metaphors on this Tumblr.

[pastel-hutt-deactivated20180115]

This works as a metaphor for children but also it works perfectly well when played totally straight because horse people are actually like this

[rider-waite-blog]

it literally took me three solid readings through this to realize that it wasn’t necessarily about horse people, because they are exactly like this

[dajo42]

oh FUCK its GIANT ANTIMATTER SATAN better bring out the CAR KEYS

[the-a-j-universe]

Pokemon’s pretty great

[zizibutik]

why is Hilary Clinton there?

[yeah-yeah-beebiss-1]

pokemon go-ing to the polls

[arugulafriend]

The final Pam walked so Alicina Dimitrsecu could run

[ashestoashesjc]

😌 (x)

[paxamericana]

you’re hearing it more and more

[kyrare]

Spotify Premium ad: “Imagine playing music without interruptions! Infinite skipping! Replay the song you want! And even do it offline? No ads! Whatever songs you want! For a small monthly payme-” Me: *nods, turns off Spotify and turns on my MP3 player and does all the things they offer, but for free and with songs they don’t even have*

[jimtheviking]

For those of you who might not know how to do any of this:

To convert CD audio into mp3s, you just follow the steps here

To play mp3 files, you download an mp3 player like Winamp here and away you go

On mobile? There are plenty of free mp3 players for your phone available, too, so check them out

You don’t need to be tethered to an online streaming service for your music. Be free.

[eroticcannibal]

You can also rip audio files from youtube and find files all over the internet. It is far easier to come across great and lesser known music if you dont limit yourself to spotify.

[aromanticduck]

[Image description: a tweet from Don Hughes (@getfiscal) which reads:

“Started imagining paying for Spotify for the next thirty or so years and got a bit dizzy, cancelled a bunch of subscriptions, installed Linux on my computer and then pulled out my old CDs to rip. Going caveman”

End description]

[girlbossganondorf-moved-deactiv]

She calls men “man-things”...ofc she’s a lesbian

[countdraluka]

People in the comments being like "her lines state she is into men" clearly played a different game than the one I did.

Also, her objectifying men as prey for slaughter is even the least lesbian thing about her. It just makes it clear she isn't into them.

But have you been to her castle?

Have you looked at the four erotic statues of women being pinned down? That was what initially gave the game a "sexual content" rating, apparently. You also cannot walk into a room without finding art depicting some half-naked Maiden, and don't even get me started on the Sanguis Virginis business model.

What about the servants she infects and keeps around to serve her every whim? Not the nicest thing - but she is a villain, so one can hardly blame her for acting as one. Even still, the game files do make it seem that this is a relatively recent thing, and that the castle had a functional servant dynamic at one point.

Woman is living the evil sapphic dream, is what I’m saying.

[hyperfixation-loto]

Facts.

[eternal-fractal]

you don’t need the analysis she’s a 9ft tall vampire lady, theres literally no way she’s straight