a book should be $5 a little drink should be $2 and museum access should be free and all hours
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Sweet Seals For You, Always
Mike Driver
Claire Keane
tumblr dot com

gracie abrams
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Jar Jar Binks Fan Club
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
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EXPECTATIONS
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

ellievsbear
noise dept.
Today's Document
★
Monterey Bay Aquarium
macklin celebrini has autism
untitled
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

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@shouldthestarsgoout
a book should be $5 a little drink should be $2 and museum access should be free and all hours
"going out to get milk" is a common turn of phrase used to describe a man abandoning his family.
the "milkman" is a common figure in stories depicting a woman's infidelity and adulterous affair.
this implies that the ability to provide milk would both decrease the likelihood of a man abandoning his wife and children, as it would eliminate the need for leaving to get milk AND would secure that man's marriage, as his wife would have no need to seek milk from an extraneous source.
therefore, all men should produce milk, through various means such as:
- being a cow
- being an almond
- being a woman
- being a coconut
- being in the omegaverse
- being an oat
(list is exemplary and not finite)
in this essay, i will redefine the nuclear family and explain the seductive and inflammatory nature of the 1993 "Got Milk?" commercials.
you shut your mouth.
”This portrayal of a marginalized group was wrong then and is wrong now” and “This portrayal of a marginalized group was very progressive for the time period and paved the way for more representation while likely limited by factors outside of the creator’s control” are two statements that can and should ABSOLUTELY coexist and be kept in mind when interacting with older media
Great example
$10 budget Raiders of the Lost Ark
I looked for the original tweet and found more
i really love this genre of image
The best part of that video is that the owner found the ORIGINAL plush later on the beach and took another video with it after their grandmother stitched it back up
I love the death grip after the toy was fixed up. Lessons were learned. Try to steal it this time you fucking bird. I dare you.
i am banned from eating my herring inside. they make me eat it on the smoking area by the loading dock, under the theory that it already smells bad there. but it was raining today which was preventing my breakfast, so i was feeling sad and hungry and then i realized that there was a large cardboard box in the dumpster from a previous delivery. like a fridge sized box. so i fished it out of the dumpster, then tipped it on its side and had a nice little cardboard cave to watch the rain and eat my fish in. which was a great experience. very soothing. very zen. at least until the security guard from the day before stepped outside to smoke. then i tried hiding from him by crawling deeper in the box, which unfortunately did not work. instead he saw a sort of damp sniveling pale hairless creature eating fish in a box, and delivered the verbal killshot of "good morning, mr. smeagol." which is how my day was ruined before 8 am.
it's hard being a polyamorous action hero because whenever i have flashbacks to all my dead wives it takes like 20 minutes to get through all of it
it kind of sounds like youre just feeding local women to the deadwife montage
this is so late renaissance early mannerism. the controversial male nudity? the lighting and value on the figure of emphasis?? him bathed in light and placed ABOVE while the police are clad in dark and BELOW?? Uh HES HITTING THE CONTRAPPOSTO??
i'm having a bad day. someone is going to die today (remembers suicide jokes are bad for my mental health) and it's not going to be me. (gets scared someone will report me to the police) people around the world die of natural causes every day. (remembers i want people to think i'm smart) and i know who it's going to be (remembers i want to retain an air of mystery) but i'm not telling.
ungrounding exercises.
what are five things you can't see? can you breathe in and out really really quickly for me? what are your biggest fears and what are the fastest ways they might occur? slouch in your chair put your hands on your head and picture yourself using your psychic powers to kill everyone. shoot the nearest dog.
I remember one time I got INSANELY high off of edibles while playing Among Us, and it quickly became apparent to the other players online. I forget how honestly but literally anything "sus" I did was ignored by everyone because I was so fucking high. I tested this theory by standing in front of a body and the person that actually reported it didn't even mention me. The funniest part was when I was trying to do wires, I kept fucking up over and over again, so I was just standing in front of wires for actual minutes trying to figure it out. A small crowd of players gathered around me to watch and would get mad every time someone reported a body or emergency meeting because "she's never going to get her tasks done if you keep interrupting them." I don't think anyone cared about winning at that point, they just wanted to see the high crew mate succeed in her tasks.
Question 7: Assuming that the Roman Catholic doctrine of transubstantiation is correct, estimate how tall Christ our Lord must have been in order for His body to furnish all properly consecrated Communion wafers consumed to date. Justify your assumptions.
Great work everyone
Loving the crowdsourced sacrilege on display here
I asked maths boy for his input
#ok but are we assuming average human density here or can we have a black hole jesus #will there be a noticeable gravitational effect from standing too close to our lord and savior #can i - and this is critical - can i be spaghettified by jesus (via @dreadful-puns-and-finger-guns)
One word: homeopathy
No no this is a typo
You see
He is six feet tall but infinitely bread
Watching Star Wars in chronological order is so funny.
Obi-Wan Kenobi really took one look at R2D2 in the middle of the desert and said “No, Luke, I’ve never seen this fucking droid in my life. Looks like a real bitch though. Not that I’d know. This is my first time meeting the asshole.”
No one in that whole franchise was Gatekeep-Gasslight-Girlbossing quite like “Ben” Kenobi, regular human-man.
Bish you cannot leave all this glorious commentary in the freakin tags
forever thinking of the time i just wanted to know how long i could go without sleeping and google autofilled it to “in minecraft” without me realizing. you can imagine my shock and horror until i read the website title
no you do not need to hold fictional characters "accountable". they are not real.
not a photograph, another art study
The only way forward is to stop treating masculinity as synonymous with harmful, monstrous, or dangerous.
There is a fundamental difference between "men are dangerous" (wrong, bioessentialist) and "the patriarchy allows dangerous men to exist unchecked" (true).