Irondad Is Superior

Eh so far it’s been just random memes for myself-

[skitch0sketch]

Tony: god, I need another coffee

Peter: you’ve… you’ve already had 5 cups

Tony: I don’t remember asking how many I’ve had??

[skitch0sketch]

[Text]

Peter: Hey Mr. Strsk si it not as badjh as it seens

Tony: dear god what did you do

Tony: why did you just spell almost every word wrong

Peter: waifr

Peter: sorry I was dizzy I just had to wait a sec for it to go away

Tony: why were you dizzy????

Peter: Um so I got stabbed agai and am kinda bleeding out as we soeak

Peter: [let’s play 8-ball!]

Tony: PETER WHAT THE FUCK

[skitch0sketch]

Peter: *stumbles into room*

Tony: hey, what happened?

Peter: no one died

Peter: it’s also not as bad as it looks

Tony: what-

Tony: WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT

[skitch0sketch]

Peter: *crying*

Tony: what’s wrong??

Peter: I just realized Mr. Rogers can’t build legos

Steve: why can’t I?

Tony: yeah why can’t he???

Peter, sobbing: BECAUSE THE AGE RANGE ON THE BOX SAYS 4-99 AND HES 105

Tony:

Steve:

Steve: *clicks legos together seriously* it’s ok. I’ve done more illegal things

[skitch0sketch]

✨Rhodes and Tony in their chaotic college life✨

Rhodey: did we actually just lock ourselves out of the car?

Tony: I thought you got the keys

Rhodey: Tones you drove here. You drive, you get the keys

Tony: I’m sorry, when did we agree to make me the responsible one?

Tony:

Tony, eyes widening: Oh. Oh shit-

Rhodey: ???

Tony: I left Shellsea in the car I LEFT SHELLSEA IN THE CAR-

Rhodey: I’m sorry, who?

Tony, already tossing a shopping cart at the car window: NO TIME TO EXPLAIN

~~Bonus~~

Rhodey: you destroyed our car window for a turtle you picked up off the side of the road?

Tony: tortoise

Tony: and yes. It was my dad’s anyway he can afford it :)

Rhodey: you pissed him off so he took it

Rhodey: we now have no car Tony

Tony: oh yeah

[skitch0sketch]

Peter: My spidey senses-

Bucky: lmao you mean tingle

Peter: call that again and I’ll-

Bucky: *laughs* you’ll what

Peter, tearing up: I dunno cry about it

Bucky:

Tony glaring at him, repulsers glowing in the shadows:

Bucky: *stares fearfully*

[skitch0sketch]

Peter, on the phone with Tony: hey Mr. Stark! So I know you’re busy but I just wanted to know if I could borrow your first aid kit to fix up a little thing… I also need a way to stitch it up so I just wanted to make sure that’s in there too. If not that’s totally ok though! I could just use May’s sewing kit again and I saw a video on five minute crafts that I could use-

Tony: Peter

Tony: this is exactly why I have anxiety oh my god

[skitch0sketch]

Peter: *humming patriotically*

Tony: what’s that song?

Peter: Oh it’s from that new Rogers Musical.

Tony, now very much intrigued: what-

Peter: it’s kind of like the Walmart version of Hamilton. Songs are pretty good but you should see the costumes-

Sam: I BOUGHT US TICKETS

Bucky: FUCK YEAH LMAO

~~~~~~~~~

Everyone: *grinning at Steve as “I can do this all day” plays*

Steve:

[skitch0sketch]

Peter: *walks out of his bedroom*

Happy: *walks out of May’s 🧍*

Peter:

Happy:

Happy: um… hey Pete-

Peter: oh my fucking god

*flips out window*

~~~~bonus~~~~

Peter, now on the phone with Tony: MR STARK THE WORST THING JUST HAPPENED I WOKE UP AND I JUST- *starts sobbing*

[greeds]

strong stoic man with sad past: *adopts child*

me every single time:

[westiec]

It’s about choosing to break the cycle of abuse and doing your best to ensure the next generation doesn’t have to endure what you did. And that’s fucking heroic work.

[greeds]

and it is also about learning to heal 🥺😭

[skitch0sketch]

Peter after getting a paper cut: ow-

Tony:

[skitch0sketch]

Peter: Hey guys I brought Oreo cake

Tony: cool tha-

Bucky: wait- Oreo???

Peter: ..y-yea-

Bucky, absolutely amazed: HOLY SHI- THEY HAVE OREOS IN CAKE NOW?? THATS SO AWESOME GIMME

Everyone:

Sam:

Sam: you know, Steve had the same reaction when he saw all the ice cream flavors they didn’t have before

Bucky:

Bucky: *walks out the door* I’m going to Publix

[skitch0sketch]

Tony: Hey, kid are you doing ok?

Peter: Today, I crossed the street only looking one way instead of both ways.

[skitch0sketch]

*Peter and Ned having a sleepover at the compound*

Peter: ok so if Tony comes let’s just be like “Andy’s coming” and pretend to sleep because he doesn’t like when I’m up late

Ned: seems legit

*Tony walks in knowing they weren’t asleep*

Peter: Andy’s coming

Peter and Ned: *collapse*

Tony:

Tony: what the fuck did you just say to me

Based off true events because my friend and I are literal dumbasses and we’ll laugh at anything at this point so we wheezed at this for a while :,)

[skitch0sketch]

*The rouge avengers back at the compound*

Peter, staring at Steve: Captain.

Steve: Uh... So you’re Spider-ma-

Peter: I’d like to let you know that if you ever touch Mr. Stark again, I’m flinging you off the Manhattan bridge

Steve: I..

The other avengers:

Peter: That also goes for the rest of you, bye assholes *jumps out window*

Tony:

Tony, his voice cracking because he loves his protective son: S-so yeah that’s Peter

[theglowpt2-deactivated20200101]

oh you think your life is hard? try being a gay rat living in france who hates your dad and just wants to cook

[owlistic]

why did this post make me realize there are no female rats in this movie

[deathdaydreamm]

actually there is, she has one line at the end when she says “how do you know?”

ok I just skimmed though the movie again, and here she is in the beginning, she just doesn’t say anything, and you wouldn’t guess she was a girl because they didn’t do that weird humanizing, tits and longer eyelashes thing that most movies with animals do.

i’m pretty sure that all the female coded rats are the smaller rats, which is apparently accurate to real rats. Remmy is also really small. after going though the movie I realized that there are only five rats that have actual lines. Remmy, Emile, the dad, the really big bodyguard rat, and the rat at the end. whack.

[gabriellegibby]

>girl rats are smaller

>Remmy is smaller

>Remmy is trans

[lemememeringue]

remmy is trans and his father accepts that but not his passion for cooking

[loopityboop-deactivated20221117]

remmy: dad i think im a boy

dad: sure son

remmy: also im tired of eating literal rotted garbage

dad: you w h a t

[lilyrosegold]

Dad: no daughter of mine is going to cook!

Remmy: actually dad I’m a boy

Dad: thank you for telling me I support you

Dad: NO SON OF MINE IS GOING TO COOK!

[ultimatebottom69]

Educate your girls like you would educate your boys. Take litterally

[skitch0sketch]

Tony: what do you guys want for Christmas

Clint: Arrows

Nat: knives

Bucky: a flying car

Peter: anything sciencey :)

Steve: a sketchbook

Tony: Ok-

Coulson raising from the dead: A captain America scented candle

Everyone:

Coulson: Smells like f r e e d o m