Sparkly Eevee

Eevee, 30, trans man, he/him. Writer, publisher, blogger, aspiring gardener, amateur herbalist, occasional real-life activist.

[elenafisher-archive]

[mavenmemnon]

[yujateaandpi]

Was driving with my grandmother and in broken English she says “no eyes… no nose… no face. Don’t trust.” To which I looked around wildly in search of this omen of ill portend.

Cybertruck. It was a cybertruck.

[tentacleteapot]

are you familiar with Articuno, the legendary Pokémon that’s a combination Ice-type and Flying-type? well, this is the end of the pointy crest thing at the top of its head.

and that’s just the tip of the ice bird…

[tentacleteapot]

[vintage-tigre]

[squaresaw]

So last month I got hit by a car and died right. Which I didn't initially realize until I watched some guy haul my body into his pickup and drive off. Which, being that it's deep in rural Michigan, I assume means my body will make some venison jerky and maybe some wall decoration, and I'll be resigned to being one of hundreds of deer ghosts floating around Saginaw, which is w/e. But then I find out the guy works at a taxidermy shop or something, and he's actually pretty good at stuffing and mounting deer carcasses, which I come to find out when I find myself face to face with my old body in the shop window. So naturally, I figure since ghosts need to possess something to interact with the living world and etc etc etc the most logical thing to do is to possess my own body, since it's basically a statue of myself. And a little surprisingly, it actually fits like a glove. Like, since it's my body, it feels like stepping right back into place. So I get out of town and back to my herd, eventually. And that's where the trouble starts coming into it, because after I get settled again, I don't know how to explain to everyone else what feels so weird. Like since I can move my body and do everything I used to do, it's functionally the same, like nothing happened. Or it SHOULD be, so I don't know how to explain how it's NOT. But it's just hard to explain it to someone who's never been hit by a truck I guess

[jansila]

@charl0ttan

[beardedmrbean]

[prokopetz]

Blackout poetry exists on a dual axis from "banal" to "insightful" on the input side and "kind of deep" to "incredibly fucking dumb" on the output side, and while taking something banal and producing something kind of deep is well and fine, for my money taking something insightful and rendering it incredibly fucking dumb is where the real art is.

[petrodykeonicapocalypse]

[absolutelynotclassicusernam-blog]

#i stuck the word 'banal' in there twice specifically so that 'anal' would be low hanging fruit#but i genuinely did not anticipate 'banana' --@prokopetz

[inthefallofasparrow]

[puddox]

saw someone including "Mandate of Heaven" as one of those christian terms tumblr likes to use to sound profound. which i get where you're coming from but t☝️hat one is chinese

[yuriinullification]

holdon

what the fuck is going on in this site's backend

[mrsandman42069]

[thecryptkeeper]

i know the way people talk about their pets now is probably how we’ve been doing it for all of history. a cat owner in ancient rome saw their cat lounging on the dining pillows and commented “he thinks himself to be the senator claudius 🤣”

[hotvampireadjacent]

https://twitter.com/birdtickler/status/1552657242909904897?s=21&t=q4JEDIALmV-cAjcoEOypdw

[littlemisspipebomb]

ok so I looked it up, and it turns out they made a track out of PVC pipes, down a hill. The owner didn't realise PVC expanded in the heat, so on a turn the track just fell apart and the dude inside went over a fucking free way and into a swamp.

[aspiringwarriorlibrarian]

The funniest part is that the inspector was watching the whole time, and once the ball stopped he left without saying anything. Park management just shut it down then and there.

[baronfulmen]

"The ball cleared a small hill, briefly going airborne, then zipped right across Route 94, the two-lane road splitting the park. Cars honked and slammed on their brakes. If there had been opposing traffic, Frank would have become part of a real-life game of Pong, volleying from one bumper to another.

Still in pursuit, we followed the ball toward a small lake in Motor World that had been earmarked for a fleet of tiny bumper boats for children. The area wasn’t open yet, but the empty boats were being tested and floated on the surface. The ball soared over the grass and smashed into several of them, scattering the others with rippling waves from the impact, which launched some of the boats several feet in the air.

Charlie and Ken waded into the water looking for the hatch. After some difficulty, they got it open. Charlie pulled Frank out by grabbing him under his armpits like a baby. Frank crawled up the bank, coughing and sputtering. He splayed across the grass as we all stared at the ball, which bobbed in the water like it was attached to a fishing lure.

We did not ask for the inspector’s report, nor did we ever hear of one being filed. Ken Bailey returned to Canada. The snow-makers cleared away the PVC. Told to dispose of the Bailey Ball, they rolled it into the woods, where it remained for many years."

I don't know that this beats the teeth story, but it's pretty great.

[toastbutteregg]

[random-jot]

Standing directly in the doorway to achieve peak mental health.

[meowtalhead]

[greelin]

being alive is great because there are so many different vegetables you can sauté. but then there are also the horrors

[yves-and-scessernee]

with faith and perseverance, one day we will sauté the horrors

[so-much-to-read-deactivated2025]

[half-giant-fighter]

[cungadero]

i hate viruses so fucking much. literally getting attacked by a fucking shape. a concept. consumes no energy. responds to no stimuli. its only existence is to fuck with you. like fuck offf

[thrice-the-nobling]

prev's tags are too good not to save

[skipppppy]

So can non-disabled people stop doing that thing where they act like it’s morally righteous to force yourself to work while you’re sick and assume taking sick days automatically equates to laziness. Any time now. That’d be great

[skipppppy]

The leader of the scout group I help out at approached me out of hours while I was walking to work to tell me that people have been talking behind my back because I missed more sessions than I attended this term (on account of having Covid twice) and was like “We all show up when we’re sick because we take responsibility” and I felt really shitty and guilty and cried the whole workday then I got home and told my mum and she was like “So they want you to throw up on the kids? That’s dodgy. They don’t even pay you. Stop going” and a wave of serenity hit me like a bus

[fu-boss]

Real life Road Runner

[sahonithereadwolf]

Looney Tunes is real and happening outside.

[dancing-crow]

good lord its feet really do spin around in a circle when going fast

[despazito]

Sooner or later leftists will have to deal with the issue that capitalism has made many people used to wanton excess and sooner or later we'll have to legit tell everyone we can't have plastic treats and luxury produce or cruises instantly available year round and it's gonna make so many people mad and call you a big meanie worse than stalin over it. It will not be popular at all but someone's gotta hold a firm no or the planet will never stop collapsing. We can't save the planet by living exactly how we do now just with a communist banner over it we have to take a loss sorry, shein product cycles shouldn't have been normalized to begin with.

[despazito]

The banana discourse really separated the wheat from the chaff of which "lefties" actually want a global workers revolution and which ones just want more stuff to be free

[jdtrashman]

this kind of childish thinking, and it is childish, is why the left always loses.

Everyone will not "just". Everyone will never "just". If your plan hinges on everyone going along with your plan, even under threat of force, then you do not have a plan. Everyone has never "just" in the history of the human race, and they sure as fuck ain't gonna start now.

I want leftism to succeed. I do. But the situation we're in is a genie that isn't going back in the bottle. There ain't nothing in those century old theory books that has the answer for 2026 capitalism.

[chelonianmobile]

Also, like, I'm not an economist, but would putting the means of production in the workers' hands really result in less work, if that's what they're getting at? Why wouldn't bananas still be produced, with the payment for them just going to the people who actually grew them?

[hmantegazzi]

It's not that they don't get produced, it's that, if you pay the farm workers fairly, cultivate them in an environmentally responsible fashion and pay for the actual costs of shipping them transcontinentally, bananas would be quite expensive in places like the United States, more or less how melons are super expensive and regarded as a luxury product in Japan. And because the price is higher, less bananas would be bought, meaning that less of them would need to be produced, and the economies of scale to keep costs low would disappear, resulting in extra price increases.

Now, this is not a particularity of bananas, they are just a good example because they don't grow in rich countries. It's the same thing with Bangladeshi clothing, Taiwanese microchips, Czech cars, American medications or Argentine beef. But only some of those products already have their actual costs included in their prices, and are those that come from countries where labour, industrial and environmental regulations are strong and firmly established.

Luxury isn't the only reason that makes people prefer products from certain origins: well paid, well trained and healthy workers using good tools and good materials make better things, and some countries, companies and associations make the point of keeping their standards high so that people abroad keep choosing what they make.

What's the overall result of an economy that works on those principles? In general, better paid workers paying more less times for better products that serve them well for longer,a resurgence of the repair economy, efficiency biased on the side of quality rather than speed or volume, smaller gross production and higher surplus values, hence smaller and more productive economies, and a massive transference of wealth from the top to the bottom, with billions of poor people in poor countries living significantly better at the cost of some time and money inconveniences for those of us they have more than enough to live comfortably, like having to pay a premium for a smartphone you'll be using for the next decade, or having to wait a few months until tomatoes are in season locally.

[chelonianmobile]

I feel that if people are paid fairly here too, they'd have more money to spend on bananas.

[hmantegazzi]

Yes, but you are paid more fairly than people in El Salvador or the Central African Republic, so something like a worldwide agreement on minimum wages or workplace safety would mean a much bigger improvement for workers there than for their fellows in rich countries. Even correcting for costs of living, poor people in rich countries are still significantly better paid and better served than poor people elsewhere, and inevitably that means that they wouldn't be the most benefited ones by a large-scale project of internalising production costs.

And that's the point OP is doing: that there is a lot of leftist people in rich and middle income countries that is not rich in their context, but still benefits from being, lets say, internationally rich, and if confronted to the implications of that fact with respect to their ideology, they tend to backtrack on the latter as they see that they don't happen to be the biggest beneficiaries of fairier social policies.

[chelonianmobile]

Fair enough. Lot of people in the comments seem to be talking like luxuries literally should not exist, though, whatever OP meant.

[sparklyeevee]

I'd love to know how out of parameters it would really be to grow bananas in, say, Florida, what the ecological concerns are, etc.

[cheaphalloweencostume]

yesterday my grandma found a penny on the floor and said to my grandpa “there’s that penny again, pa!” and i absolutely lost my mind because i couldn’t shelve the thought of a single panel Far Side comic of two old people on the front porch in the middle of nowhere and a giant penny angrily and inexplicably rolling through the wastes

“there’s that penny again, pa!”

[secreteggplantbaby]

[cheaphalloweencostume]

this is hands down my single favorite post ive ever made that got notes

[morgannalefey]

I sincerely hope that the OP realizes that gramma was very likely quoting that cartoon.

[cheaphalloweencostume]

the cartoon that was drawn and posted based on my post? probably not, but i guess we can never know