words

Im here, queer, and much more active on my main blog, @tis-i-bat-anon :) (fun fact, it became my main blog after I used it more bc friends, this used to be my main lol)

[yetanothergreyjedi]

It's like not having a printer.

You need to print a document. It's 10 cents a page for black and white, 50 cents for color.

It's a little confusing, where do you pay? How do send the document? But your teacher requires you to print it, so you figure it out and pay the 30 cents for your three pages.

There is only enough time to go to the office and get things printed between class if the office isn't dealing with anything important. Every problem is more important than you needing to print your assignment.

You walk past the office between each class and if it's empty you go get you assignment printed.

Your friends decorate their binders with pretty pictures they printed in color off the internet.

You ask them if they can print your next assignment, they agree. They leave it on the printer, your assignment is late. Your grade is marked down.

You ask your parents if they can take you to school early, they are frustrated. Can't you print between classes? You can try...

You do this for several years, some teachers are kind and will except an emailed copy. Some understand, and will let you leave class to print. Not everyone. Not always.

The total you have spent on printing is not enough to buy a printer.

You spend significantly more time than your printer owning peers worrying about printing for all of your high school/college career.

Now you're an adult, and you need to print something.

You go to the library, It's 10 cents a page for black and white, 50 cents for color.

It's a little confusing, where do you pay? How do send the document? But the government requires you to print it, so you figure it out and pay the 30 cents for your three pages.

[ihaveaheadache-feather18581]

NOTE: IN THE USA, IN INDIANA. IF YOU NEED TO PRINT THINGS FOR FOOD STAMPS/MEDICAID. YOU CAN PRINT STUFF FOR FREE AT ANY FOOD STAMP/MEDICAID OFFICE. OTHER STATES MIGHT DO THIS TOO. JUST GO THERE OR CALL AND ASK.

[squirrel4299]

Smaller note: Some govt phone places will let you print things at their stores if you need to!!! I work at one in my town and we help people print/copy their govt documents all day!!!

[insomniac-arrest]

people talk all the time about “primal instincts” and it’s usually about violence or sexual temptations or something, but your humanity comes with a lot of different stuff that we do without really thinking about, that we do without being told to or prompted to

your average human comes pre-installed with instincts to:

Befriend

Tell story

Make Thing

Investigate

Share knowledge

Laugh

Sing

Dance

Empathize with

Create

we are chalk full of survival instincts that revolve around connecting to others (dog-shaped others, robot-shaped, sometimes even plant-shaped) and making things with our hands

your primal instincts are not bathed in blood- they are layered in people telling stories to each other around a fire over and over and putting devices together through trial and error over and over and reaching for someone and something every moment of the way

[full-moon-phoenix]

~“Your primal instincts are not bathed in blood.”

My god this is beautiful. Such a refreshing change of pace to the constant glorification of instinctual human violence.

[thechekhov]

Primal Human Instinct pack also includes bonus instincts such as:

imitating weird noises made by other animals

playing with water

the urge to eat anything brightly colored and jelly-like

touching things that look like they will move in a funny way

seeing faces in literally everything, including toast

jumping up to see if you can bap the top of that doorway

saying ‘ow’ when something unexpected happens, even if it doesn’t hurt

[blackgirlsreverything]

[ceekari]

All things that you should not have to be rich in order to do

[eldritchsandwich]

#those things shouldn’t be fucking pipe dreams!

[zohbugg]

[johanirae]

I want to be rich enough that whenever my internet friends mentions they have financial troubles or their pet cat is unwell I can anonymously drop a couple of K into their kofi account like some kind of fairy god mother

[xiranjayzhao]

Broke: Marie Antoinette bankrupted France with her dresses and wigs and got beheaded for telling starving peasants to go eat cake

Woke: France's debt from helping the American Revolution was a bigger factor in its bankruptcy than anything Marie ever spent money on, but she was scapegoated due to xenophobia and misogyny and never even said the cake quote

BESPOKE: Even though Marie was the victim of xenophobia and misogyny she was still an archconservative who resisted progressive reform harder than Louis, brokered secret deals with deputies to sabotage the Revolution, tried to escape with Louis to turn an army on their own people, and does not deserve to be glorified as some sort of feminist icon when events led by lower class women, like the Women's March on Versailles, are lesser known than the factoid that the cake quote is a lie

[newvegascowboy]

"Tumblr is my bedroom" this "tumblr is a pinboard" that

Tumblr is an apartment complex with thin walls and every so often you just have to listen to your neighbors say the most deranged shit imaginable

[a-ginger-in-black]

Sometimes you find out that the neighbor in question is Neil Gaiman.

[iamramonadestroyerofworlds]

I am not joking I am not exaggerating the thirst on this fucking website for cis dudes w a lil extra fat on their chests... And the insistence on referring to those as titties and boobs and big naturals. Has made me (trans man) feel significantly better about my boobs! Everyone here sees a dude with big ol bazoonkas and goes fucking apeshit. Hell yeah. Men's tits. I got those too! Maybe they're also hot on me! Holy shit! Men's tits!

[iamramonadestroyerofworlds]

You guys really like this post huh

[iamramonadestroyerofworlds]

The notes on this post:

1 hell yeah men's tits

2 sorry what did you say I saw men's tits and blacked out and reblogged

3 I'm also a trans guy/trans masc and I feel the same way!

4 I'm a fat cis guy and I feel the same way!

5 I'm a trans guy/ trans masc and I feel differently but I'm happy for u

6 I'm a lesbian, I don't even go here, but fuck yeah everybody loving their body is great

7 I'm a trans girl and I feel the same abt something this website finds hot (girldick, tall girls, also men's tits cuz less traditionally feminine titties being hot is great for anyone who wants to be happy with their body)

8 me wondering how the fuck my post got so many notes

9 people responding to that with what did you expect you posted abt men's tits on the liking men's tits website

[the-haiku-bot]

2 sorry what did

you say I saw men’s tits and

blacked out and reblogged

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[danwithouttheplan]

slowly puts my hand out for my new followers to sniff before I try to pet them

[danwithouttheplan]

Alright, post cancelled. You can all go home now.

[were--ralph]

when the human 2.0 patch rolls out i think people with uvulas should lay eggs rather than keeping them up in there

[were--ralph]

i can not stress the confidence when i paused and thought "I'm pretty sure uvula is the right part" and got it in one

[were--ralph]

i feel like im being pranked is it a uterus or an ovary or what what is happening in there

[were--ralph]

im tired y'all got conveyor belts and stuff in ya coochie ig

[posts-with-10000-notes-in-spirit]

current note count: 82

[were--ralph]

don't you put that curse on me

[were--ralph]

you little shits

[weaver-z]

Fondly remembering the time that a cat owner casually entered their calico Maine Coon in a cat fancier’s competition and the judges lost their minds because the cat was 1) male and 2) able to bear children

[weaver-z]

Anyway here’s Dawntreader Texas Calboy as a silly lil kitten

[weaver-z]

Here’s an excerpt from one of the articles about the drama his entry caused among the Cat Fanciers that I thought was very earnest and sweet <3

And also some of Calboy’s children!

[gasterofficial]

@pangur-and-grim

[elodieunderglass]

He is fearfully and wonderfully made!

[rainbow-lizzard]

ALT

I was about to say he would technically be an intersex king (not because I dislike the concept of trans cats, just bc intersex rep is sorely needed too) but I did some more reading on this icon and actually found the article OP referenced.

ALT

He’s not your usual male calico kitty as it turns out. That’s already cool and rare, but he’s even cooler and rarer than that!

ALT

ALT

Calboy is a chimera!! Which is really fucking cool of you ask me. The chances of having a male calico this way are slim to none, but the mad lad still exists! What an icon. I would die for Calboy.

[weaver-z]

Everyone in the tags of this post @ cat show judges

[sweetenby]

Originally I was looking for an adult picture of Calboy

(He’s so pretty 🥰)

But I also found a source for the article screenshotted above! And folks it’s WILD. It’s an incredibly interesting read if you happen to love hearing about niche hobby drama. It’s also just a fantastically written article!

The parts I find the most interesting are about how conservative the cat fanciers association is. This isn’t even all of the parts that talk about that.

People are so mad about this cat spefically because he has female colors. An animal who couldn’t choose how it was born. This is happening in Texas by the way. Hm. I wonder how they treat trans people over there?

[ilovedirt]

Reblogging again for this crucial addition

[discoasphodel13]

Hey so it's come to my attention that the Creators of Disco Elysium want you to share the game and not give the company who took over and fired them (illegally)?) any profits off of their ideas and work, and I originally joined tumblr 2 weeks ago when that post was going around about the Steam sale and how you should [Skull and Crossbones flag] it instead.

So.

in light of that.

Check the replies/notes of this post :)

I was informed that posts containing links in them aren't findable in the search so i'll just.... drop a link in a seperate reboot :)

first things first though, copy this key:

q4-EJ9G2DV7MYYI-Vs0KdQ

[discoasphodel13]

here's the edited version with the captal YY in the key above!

2326 files and 29 subfolders

and also the Google drive link :

[kmercl]

Burying your face in someone’s tits reblog if you agree

[jad3w1ngs]

Reblog this if you believe that Demisexuality exists and if you support Demisexuals

I’m sick of seeing apparently ‘LGBT inclusive’ posts that completely disregard my sexuality. I want to know who out there believes that I and others like me exist and have a valid sexuality. 

[aesterea-archived]

i really really mean it please write muslim characters, it’s really not that daunting literally all you have to do is throw in a few casual qualities.

have them squint uncertainly at the meat options in a restaurant and ask if there’s pork in the sandwich. have them mention on the phone “oh, i’m gonna stop by the mosque first for prayer but i’ll be there soon.” have your hijabi girls squeal over cute scarves in mall store windows and swoon over sparkly pins. have them kindly reject a glass of water and say “oh, i’m fasting today.”

just don’t make their religion their only defining aspect. like??

for most women, wearing hijab is about as casual as wearing a shirt or pants. give me a badass woman on a mission to save the world just like you’d write literally any other badass woman on a mission to save the world— this one just happens to keep her hair in a headscarf and is careful not to eat certain foods?

and not all muslim women wear scarves, a lot of them just choose not to or they decide not right now but they’ll do it later? like, give me a girl who’s absolutely determined to break a world record and halfway through the story she shows up in a headscarf for the first time and it’s no big deal. 

give me a kid who’s on the search for an ancient magical artifact and also they get anxious at some point cause they’re busy but prayer’s gonna start soon and they don’t wanna miss it. have them whip out their phone and search for the nearest mosque. have them find some quiet place to pray alone, like in the corner of a hotel room they just booked while their travel companion’s watching TV with the volume turned down low.

just?? do a bit of research (when are the prayer times, when is ramadan, what are halal foods, mosques in texas, etc.) and write!!! muslim!!! characters!!!

[mairzymarzipan]

i don’t think people understand that people can ‘love’ you and not actually love you

like my grandmother ‘loved’ me, but she also was always trying to change me.  she tried to take me away from my (catholic bisexual) mother.  she made me wear dresses when i was there.  she always tried to get me to go to church and was always asking me if i was dating a boy yet

i spent years feeling guilty that i wasn’t what she wanted me to be until my mom told me one day “she never bothered to know the real you”

and it’s true.  any time i tried to show her something about myself, even cook for her, it would be dismissed, and a replacement would be offered.  even northern food was somehow a sin.  

she loved me what she thought i should be, she never loved me.  

bc people who love you, they love you for all the stuff that makes you you.  they never consider that it makes you inconvenient.

[cameoappearance]

“It was true: the other mother loved her. But she loved Coraline as a miser loves money, or a dragon loves its gold.“

Loving someone like a prized possession is a very different thing from loving someone like a person you care about.

[toastbutteregg]

why is this so true

[si1v3rpho3n1x]

As someone who’s tagged images for an AI neural network, you want to ignore those. just throwing that out there so yall don’t gotta worry too hard bout it

[nudityandnerdery]

This is fucking fantastic. The Edelweiss Pirates.

[cameoappearance]

[ Image description: A Facebook post by James Fell. Transcript reads:

Imagine this. It’s 1936 and you’re a teenager in Hitler’s Germany. Membership in the Hitler Youth has just become mandatory, but you say no fucking way because fuck that Nazi bullshit. What do you do? Answer: you become a pirate.

–On This Day In History, Shit Went Down: October 25, 1944–

At this time, you were allowed to leave school at age fourteen, but if you were seventeen you were going to get conscripted. If you stayed in school, you’d be forced into the Hitler Youth in order to be indoctrinated into Nazism and work to convert others into its murderous cult. Many young people quit school and formed their own resistance group called the Edelweiss Pirates, and they loved to punch Nazis.

Besides the whole allegiance to Hitler stuff, being in the Hitler Youth sucked. It was highly regimented fascist paramilitary bullshit and totally the death of fun. Hitler Youth was boys only; girls were made to be part of the League of German Girls. Edelweiss Pirates were all about freedom of expression and growing long hair and mixing genders and fucking up those Nazi punks.

They numbered in the thousands, and in addition to just enjoying being teens and playing that “degenerate” jazz and blues music and exploring their sexuality, they’d hunt down Hitler Youth patrols and beat the shit out of them on a regular basis. A pirate slogan was “Eternal War on the Hitler Youth.”

Before the war the pirates were seen as little more than an irritation, but during the war they did things such as gather up Allied propaganda dropped by airplanes and push it through people’s mailboxes to help spread the word that Hitler was bad. They also helped German Army deserters disappear. They added sugar to the gas tanks of Nazi vehicles, pulled down Nazi flags, and even derailed munitions trains. On October 25th, 1944, the Nazis finally took them seriously and Heinrich Himmler ordered a crackdown. The following month, thirteen people, many of them Edelweiss Pirates, were publicly hanged in Cologne.

The Nazi regime kept up the pressure on the Edelweiss Pirates, imprisoning many and even sending some to concentration camps, but their spirits would not be broken. History was unkind to the pirates, viewing them as criminals rather than a true resistance group. But efforts have been made to rehabilitate their image and view them as an important part of resistance to fascist authority during the Second World War. ]

[ black-and-white picture of a group of Edelweiss Pirates outdoors, with mountains in the background; there’s slightly more boys than girls and one boy has a guitar. ]

[yellowxperil-deactivated2026012]

srsly tho this is absolutely a thing that dudes do all the f***ing time

like where if he knows a girl doesn’t necessarily want to give him a hug, he will trap her in this position in front of witnesses where she has 2 options- both of which are undesirable for her, while simultaneously desirable for him

if she doesn’t want to hug him, whatever she does, it will suck for her.

she can 1. say nah and be the fucking asshole in front of other ppl or 2. forsake her corporeal boundaries and allow unwanted intimate contact

it’s a f***ing trap

[bombchelle]

F***ing hate dudes forreal.

[poltxsexkitten]

too many f***ing times ugh

[potamideriver]

Story time. One day I was on the MAX (basically a giant street car that goes all over the metro area) on my way to meet up with a few friends. I didn’t look at anyone, I didn’t speak to anyone, I just stood to the side on my phone making sure I wasn’t going to be late to my meeting. Out of no where, this guy comes up to me and starts to chat me up. Me, being who I am, am absolutely terrified to tell this guy to f*** off. He was at least half a foot taller than me, and was way too bulky for me to fight back. So I suck it up at humor him, say hello. Before introducing himself or asking me for my name, he asks me out on a date. Not wanting to piss him off I try to make light of the situation and I laugh, telling him that my boyfriend wouldn’t like the idea, but thank you for the offer. He just shrugs and says, “He doesn’t need to know.” At this point I’m scared out of my mind. There’s this guy who, after seeing me run two blocks to catch the train, comes up to me and has made it perfectly clear that he wasn’t going to leave without getting something out of me. I deny him a second time, saying, “I don’t even know you’re name. We’re strangers, I don’t know you.” He finally introduces himself and asks me for my phone number. I tell him I don’t give my number out to people I’ve just met and he says, “Fine, but at least take mine so we can meet up later.” So he watches me plug his number into my phone (which I deleted as soon as I knew I was safe and away from him) as we’re pulling up to my stop. I tell him I need to leave and switch trains and he tells me, “Oh, I’ll wait with you. I don’t have any plans, so I’m in no rush.” It’s important to note what at this point he had previously told me that he was late to a job interview, but he has all the time in the world because he still hasn’t gotten what he wanted from me; a yes. I get off of the train and he follows me, and waits at the platform with me for over ten minutes until my train arrives, asking me all sorts of personal questions about where I live and where I was going that day. As soon as the train pulls up he grabs for me and says, “Do I at least get a hug before you go?” I was terrified. I was embarrassed. This dude, who before even asking me for my name asks me out on a date and then continues to harass me after I tell him I have a boyfriend, asks me for a hug only fifteen minutes after meeting. People around us were staring at me, as if I was being rude for denying him, and every inch of me was mortified. I wanted to run, but I felt like if I had done that he would have chased after me and things would have gotten worse. So I did, and he squeezed me so tight I felt like I was going to burst. It took me a good ten seconds to get him to let go and I ran to the train car just as the doors were closing. He was trying to get me to miss my train so I would have to wait with him even longer. I would have been stuck there for over a half an hour until the next train came by, and the platform (aside from the few buses coming by) was now COMPLETELY EMPTY. He knew EXACTLY what he was doing and he knew EXACTLY how to get me alone with him. People, if you are in a situation like this do not feel obligated to give in. If someone is making you uncomfortable and asks to touch you in any way, YOU DO NOT HAVE TO SAY YES. Make excuses, be blunt, just straight up say ‘no’. If possible, go to someone else near by who you think can help you and ask them to help you. It’s important for guys to learn that they can’t get what they want just by asking over and over again. I got lucky. But not everyone does. Please, everyone, Be Safe.

[d-o-llf-a-ce]

SECOND STORY TIME

So I was on the transit bus alone one time. This was my first time riding, and so already I was PETRIFIED. I sit down, pull out my ipod, and begin to play some games. This guy sits down next to me, and begins trying to have a conversation. I don’t really respond, I don’t even look at him, just give half-hearted “mhm”s and “oh”s, as I don’t want to be rude if he was just striking up a friendly conversation. He then asks me on a date.

Now, as I stated before, I already was absolutely petrified. My heart stopped and I didn’t know how to answer. So I just didn’t. He didn’t let up and I could feel his eyes on me. I quietly stammer out a “no thanks” and my stop HAPPENS to be coming up, so I pull the string thing to let the driver know I want to stop there, and once we stop and the doors open I get up and he asks me, “Well, can I at least have a hug before you go if you won’t go on a date with me?” 

This makes me break. There are now people staring, as we are the only people standing up and not getting off… So I just start crying. Hell, I am bawling almost instantly. He looks so fucking freaked out and people are now getting up to come over and comfort me/question him. I don’t stop crying, and he keeps trying to comfort me by touching me, and people are yelling at him for that. 

AND THEN. AND. FUCKING. THEN. THE GOD DAMN BUS DRIVER. A VERY EASILY 6 FOOT BURLY MAN. COMES OVER TO US. PULLS THE GUY AWAY. AND KNEELS DOWN. HE THEN ASKS, IN THE MOST CALM VOICE, “Did you request the stop?” I very slowly and shakily nod, as I am still crying my eyes out. He then asks, “Do you want to get off?” I give a quiet “mhm” and nod once again, and he offers me his hand. I take it, he stands up, and he escorts me off the bus. He asks me questions such as where I was going next, if I was going to meet someone shortly, if I was going to transfer buses from there. He was very polite and waited for me to answer the entire time, and my friend (who I was going to be meeting there) showed up. He asked me if this was someone I knew, I said yes, and he said alright, have a good day. He then told me- and this is something stuck in my mind forever, so it is word for word-

“If some guy EVER starts harassing you like that again, do exactly what you did there. Cry. Cry and scream and have a temper tantrum. Not only will it throw him off, but it will get others to notice. They might not interfere, they might, but you will have gotten their attention and if you happen to go missing the next day the search for you will be a hell of a lot easier because everyone in that location will have seen you screaming and crying with a guy now very awkward with his actions. They will know. That is what my daughter did, and three days after she went missing she was back in my arms. I pray for you and every other person like you who has this done. You stay safe now, okay?” And after I began blubbering again, I nodded and he left.

So this is the second lesson for yall. If you can not have the courage to say no or make an excuse, cry. Let out those sobs and tears and cry your heart out. Because it is going to make people notice and make people aware.

[cosmic-noir]

Reblogging for that second story. This might save a life.

[grumpybeardruid-archive-deactiv]

I just wanna note that bus drivers can be really amazing and good ones do look out for their riders.

[han-syolo-shot-first]

Also, as an additional tip (in case you cannot cry on command or such), you can say, “No, because you’re creepy/creeping me out” and if he persists or tries to laugh it off, say “I do not want to be touched” and look at one of the strangers/persons that is watching.

It: 1. Gives them a sense of urgency in the situation, as the eye contact is a way to make them feel as though you are personally asking for their help and it is now their obligation to help. 2. Contains words so that if you’re in a public place but people aren’t necessarily watching, then they (as natural evesdroppers) can overhear the attention-grabbing words and then notice the situation. Note, this does NOT mean that they will come for help, but you might be able to look someone in the eye (as previously mentioned) or just get some people’s attention. 3. It shows that you have fight in you. As with rapists, those who are physically aggressive (ie. these huggers) choose women they see as an easy target. The moment you show them you are going/willing to fight them, they are less likely to continue. Sadly, this is not always the case, but every little bit helps.

Hopes this also helps, guys, and I’m so sad that this has to even be a post we need.

[oxfordcommaforever]

Dudes who follow me: 1) reblog this 2) don’t be the creepy guy who asks random women for hugs 3) be aware of your friends or random creepy dudes and call them out if they act gross towards girls/womem

[midoriko-sama]

Ok, I wasn’t going to comment about this, because there was no way of doing it without talking about a part of my life I really didn’t want to. But fuck that, there be young girls out there who need a hand.

So I used to be hot when I was young. I mean, model hot, because I actually used to model. Even now, I’ve let myself go on purpose because I was tired of the harassment. But I fit a UK size 6 with a pert ass from volleyball and a cup c breast. As you can imagine, I couldn’t wear anything or go ANYWHERE without being harassed. I sometimes even happened in church.

Anyway, I’m not a shrinking lily, and when I get angry enough I can do some crazy shit. So here are some of my coping mechanisms:

1) find a matronly looking lady, run up to her with ‘aunt may! I haven’t seen you in ages! ’ then whisper ‘please help he’s harassing me!’. 99.9 times out of 100, she will be scandalised and help you anyway even if she’s annoyed or in a hurry. If no older lady is available, find a younger one, or a nun, or a trans lady. We of the sisterhood know what it is to be harnessed, and I guarantee if you look frightened enough, they will help.

2) If you are out alone at night, and someone is following you, spot a house or apartment where the lights are on and knock, asking ‘mum’ or ‘dad’ or ‘john’ to let you in. Even if the people inside are annoyed, odds are they won’t turn you away, and you can phone someone to pick you up, or phone the police from a safe space

3) Make noise. Cry and scream loudly, call them out ‘i don’t know you and you are terrifying me! Please get away from me!’ if there are people around. Even if they don’t help directly for fear of their own safety, someone around you is calling security or 911.

4) speak a foreign language. If you know it, speak the language to them fast and incessantly, like you have just met someone you knew and you’re just giving the best performance rant of why your OTP is the best OTP. Make yourself ANNOYING. Think about what would be awkward and annoying to you and make it what you do to them. If you make them think YOU are something to get away from they will leave you in peace.

Now beware, the following ones are the CRAZY ones and may not always work. But they are a valid last resort:

5) stare at them. Stare at them like you’re hungry and they are a hapless deer you’re going to tear to pieces. Like yours the girl from the ring emerging from the TV to kill them. Don’t smile, don’t change your expression. DON’T BLINK. Hold their state like you’re Wednesday Adams about to do unspeakable things to a spider, and they are the spider. Even the most courageous of stalkers balk at this, but if they don’t…

6) Use the Hannibal Lector. After staring at them for and extended period of time (imagine all the things that have made you scared, imagine you could get revenge on them for putting you here, that’s the thought you need to have), if they are getting closer to you, whisper something like ‘i would fry your liver in garlic’. Even the hardiest ones will be taken aback, but keep it up while making sure you don’t let the others hear you. Things like, occult star readings requiring blood, wondering whether he is the offering the spirits sent. If you’re on this site you’ve read some weird shit at least once. Tell him that. Tell him you would like him to meet your lord, Vlad the Impaler, who requires much blood to be appeased. Be a stereotypical ‘crazy bitch’ like they see in the movies. Believe it or not, this has worked for me twice.

Above all, banish the notion that you have to be polite.

They were impolite by approaching you. If you can, ignore them. If you are not alone, pointedly put headphones in your ear, and don’t make eye contact, wait for them to realise that ‘youre a bitch anyway’ and move away. If you are alone, evade and find places and ways to fix that as soon as POSSIBLE.

And if all else fails, summon Satan.

[prismatic-bell]

Something I have learned at work:

Never underestimate the power of a good “EXCUSE me????”

Legit. It makes people STOP IN THEIR TRACKS. This is the one I whip out when people start swearing at me over the headset and always, without fail, they stop what they’re saying, shocked.

Go for offended, and go for loud. Not yelling loud, but giving-your-best-presentation loud. “EXCUSE me??? You approached me two minutes ago, I don’t even know your name, and you want WHAT? Creep.”

For one, the presentation will shock them. For another, that indignant tone? EVERYONE AROUND YOU IS GOING TO WANT TO LISTEN TO THIS JUICY SHIT.

Now the second key here is, DON’T LET HIM JADE (justify, argue, defend, explain). He smiles and goes “I just wanted–” FUCKING INTERRUPT HIM. Firmly. Irritably. “I heard what you wanted, and I’ve already declined once. Maybe you should go back to kindergarten where they teach you no means no.” Run right over the fucker. He’s not respecting your words, you don’t need to respect his.

A further note: if you’re an iPhone user, you can use Siri to call 911. (I know Android has a similar function, but I don’t know what it is–play with your AI and find out.) If you’re in a secluded area, this works well; I used to walk home from work at 2am and had to do it twice. Make eye contact with your harasser, activate Siri, and loudly, firmly say “Siri, call 911.” Siri will immediately reply “calling emergency services.” (It actually takes five seconds to activate, but there’s a Call Now button if you need it.) Almost ALWAYS the person harassing you would rather take off than wait for you to get a dispatcher on the line.

[lazycrownsuit]

Don’t want to post much stuff like this but this might be helpful one day for someone. Read it, even just a small part.

[prismatic-bell]

I have no memory of this post, but it remains true with one update:

Iphone users past the 6, there is now a new way to activate emergency services. I have the SE 2016 and cannot help you, but the internet should be able to tell you how to access this function. Check for it. It could save your life.

Also I didn’t mention this the first time around, but a guy tried to steal my carryon when I was on a flight once and and the trick I mentioned above kept him from walking off with it. EVERYONE turned to stare. EVERYONE. He dropped the bag and went “Uh I was just-just-just I thought it was mine.” “Really? You thought my women’s backpack was your bag that you haven’t taken out of the overhead bin?”

He went SILENT. He knew he had no defense left. He just sort of slunk off the plane with his (definitely very distinctive, not at all resembling mine) bag.

IT WORKS.