I post a bit of everything here. I'll occasionally chime in on science or engineering subjects and I'm a huge space and rocketry dork. Avatar by @cottaterra.
every time i start to feel cringe for being too deep in the hyperfixation i remember the intense depression i have waded through and have to remind myself that enjoyment is fleeting (so grab it with both hands), and life is for loving (so hold that love close), and if anyone thinks i’m cringe they must not be having a very good time (and i hope they can find a good time soon).
2025 vs early June. Ages 48 vs 49. I noticed my hairline start to take off around age 41, but didn't start taking meds til age 46 because I was worried about side effects and was too stressed about trying to get out of Florida to focus (or spend money) on hairloss.
I've been on oral finesteride about 3 years now (so, 13 years on HRT), which has kept my hairline from creeping back further. It works by blocking DHT, which is a masculinizing hormone converted from testosterone that contributes to hairloss on the head.
Side effects for me are less body hair (counterintuitive, but yes) and some spotting (never enough to be a mess) every day of my cycle. My libido took maybe a little hit (refactory window was usually ~5-10 min, but now sometimes closes for the night), but that's sometimes a good thing, being so tightly wound. I also am lucky not to suffer from the depression/suicidal ideation side effects.
I am also about 5 months on oral minoxidil, which promotes hair growth through a few mechanisms. I am nearing the early side of max effects (around 6 months, may continue up to a year, mainly as the hair grows longer). Side effects for me were increased tachycardia (my doc cleared me for use as someone who already has this issue and is on propranolol) for just a few days, and then my body acclimated. I also saw some body hair regrow from loss to finesteride.
I don't have crown balding - just the receding hairline, which is *very* aggressive on my mom's side. My hair is about in the middle of both parents. (Dad's side wasn't too bad.)
These photos aren't quite the same angle, but you can still see how my temples and forelock are fuller and have more definition. I am pretty happy with this result, as I like having a somewhat "mature" hairline. But like a lot of my transition milestones, I wish I had started earlier. My 39-year-old hairline was pretty perfect. 🥲
I thought sharing would be good for setting expectations, as well as combating the myth that minoxidil is only for crown balding.
Who knows how long my hairline will stay at this point, but the meds are fairly inexpensive and as I said, I'm lucky where my side effects are manageable. This combo of meds is considered the most effective at hairloss, and is prescribed even if one opts for a hair transplant.
I feel like hairloss options are gatekept from trans men/masc folks who take T. "Just man up," "this is what you wanted, isn't is?" and so on. I wanted to show an option for those who have not considered it, or maybe who are not even aware of its existence. :)
who on earth is out there waking up early to get shit done??? the purpose of waking up early is to have QUIET TIME LOUNGING IN BED before the world gets LOUD & ANNOYING AS FUCK
so much respect to the people in the notes waking up early to play video games, watch tv, phone scroll, and in general Fuck Around for a few hours before the world intrudes. now THAT'S productivity!
Easy, I've been raised to believe it's actually rude to look at someone else's book / newspaper / these days phone in public and if you're doing that, you're the creep. ♥
maybe y'all didn't notice but fat people who don't hate ourselves sure did notice that people were obsessed with shitting on fat people in the late 90s and early 2000s (conservative political time) and now are again (fascist political time), coincidentally while the market for weight loss has become a 90 billion dollar industry due to glp1s.
you are not immune to propaganda. it makes some people a whole hell of a lot of money for you to hate fat people and fear becoming (or staying, I think like 70% or something of the US is fat) one of us.
a lot of the fearmongering over fatness comes from studies directly funded by the weight loss industry...i think people don't really realize or think about the fact that research can absolutely be influenced and skewed by its funding. there is also research that shows that an amount of the negative health outcomes for fat people come from anti-fat bias. if you go to the doctor with concerns and the doctor simply tells you to lose weight, your problem is neglected and you may not even bother going to the doctor with the next problem.
every fat person you know for the most part probably has a story like this, of medical neglect. many of the stories i've heard personally are when the complaint or the doctor wasn't related at all, like being told to lose weight at the ear nose and throat doctor or at the dentist. it's straight up just bias. it's such a thing that in the show Shrill it's portrayed, when Aidy Bryant goes to the gynecologist and her doctor suggests she get gastric bypass.
the studies on health and fatness are simply not that black and white and there is basically no research that shows that more than an incredibly tiny minority of people can lose weight and keep it off for more than like 2 years. bodies have set points that they gravitate towards, it's not a personal failure. this also is how the weight loss industry succeeds so well - repeat customers.
some of the harm associated with fatness is also due to weight cycling, which is very hard on your body and is even worse if you get off a GLP1, which according to a recent study causes weight to be regained at a rate that is 4x faster than without taking a GLP1.
you don't have to hate yourself. you don't have to hate other people for their body type either. it makes me so sad to see the thinspo tag going around again in 2026 a lot like it was back in the day.
A study spanning almost four decades and involving more than 100,000 adults in Denmark found that those with an 'overweight' body mass index
there's so much crazy shit once you go down the rabbit hole. for example, BMI was not invented by anyone with a medical background. it was never meant to measure individual health.
and if i said nolan's odyssey starring no greek actors and with no recognizable aspects of greek culture or involvement by greeks, is the direct legacy of white supremacist colonialism that treated ancient greece as not just the pinnacle of ancient culture, but of an artificially created "european" culture, which white western europeans and their settler descendants, as the new pinnacle of culture, were the sole spiritual inheritors of.
^^^ PEOPLE ARE STILL THERE. There's a metro station across the street from the colosseum where i found a hair in my pizza slice. We drove by ruins of an amphitheater next to a motorway in greece once. It's literally just real places where real people live and have lived. It's not mythical perfect lands that once existed. I went to Itacha in 2023 and there was not enough parking space.
“Who is the internet even for anymore?” is such a valid question. Companies are sanitizing the internet and stifling natural human expression in the name of child safety and being family friendly, but the kids such as fuck aren’t benefitting from this. The internet is becoming too childish for adults and yet still too adult for kids.
[Image ID: Post from dhuartson reading: Don't let anyone talk you out of spending $15 on a new hobby. That $50 will be the best $400 you ever spent. /End ID]
I love youtube off-grid/homesteading videos because they're always like "living the simple life" and then depict a life ten times more complicated than mine
Like I'm sure it's way more rewarding to grow and can your own tomatoes and they're probably healthier or whatever but is it simpler than me giving Coles one dollar to bring a much more safely canned can of tomatoes to my house? No. No it is not.
Most homesteaders still need to have a job and keep a job and pay all the fees of living in a society. There seem to be a lucky handful who have reduced their costs by homesteading (usually due to the free labour of friends and family) but there were easier ways to reduce those cost. In the vast majority of cases, homesteading is a lot more expensive than not homesteading. And where people are saving money, the amount of labour per dollar works out to well below minimum wage in savings.
From what I've seen, successful homesteaders do it because they find it rewarding. Rewarding does NOT mean simple.
I can't speak to Australia, but at least in the US there is another group of homesteaders who are trying to live self-sufficiently off-grid because they expect the imminent total collapse of civilization, and they have fantasies of themselves living happily on home-grown produce while everyone else is killing each other for the last can of tomatoes at the store.
Another thing about this subset of homesteaders* is that they are insistent--proud, even!--of doing things that are unsafe, and encouraging others to also do those things.
One example is canning dairy products (milk, butter, cheese). They'll show up in a canning group and say something like, "Look how I canned all this milk that the store was getting rid of this milk for 50 cents a gallon because it's the last day!"
Sane and responsible members of the group will say things like, "Dairy isn't safe for home canning; if you have fresh milk that you need to save for later, you can freeze it or make cheese!" And, "If you need shelf-stable milk you can buy powdered milk," or "You can dehydrate it at home, but you need a really good dehydrator, plenty of trays, and it takes forever; you're usually better off just buying it."
And then the person who just canned 20 quarts of botulism will start frothing at the mouth about how when the shit hits the fan--
And yeah, I'll grant that if grocery stores cease to exist, and you are entirely reliant for your winter survival on what you can put up during times of plenty, the risk-benefit analysis would be different. But in the actual world that we currently live in, it's false economy at best, and at worst a stupid flex that could end up killing somebody.
Anyway, TL;DR, "simple" often refers to an imagined past when the problems of modernity did not exist--yet somehow, the problems of that era have been left behind--which in turn is often a racist dogwhistle.
(*Besides their substantial overlap with weapons stockpilers/"militia" types.)
The Can/Dehydrate Absolutely Everything people baffle me. Most homesteaders (sensibly) have personal solar panels, because they want to live off-grid and still have electricity. When Shit Hits The Fan, their solar panels will not stop working. Their freezers would work fine. Canning or dehydrating or salting is great for certain foods (especially if you want to ferment, pickle or flavour something) but for so much stuff the best thing you can do to preserve nutrients and preserve it safely is chuck it in the freezer.
The simplest, but also the most immature, answer is that solar panels are 'cheating.' These people base their doomsday images on Fallout and zombie apocalypse movies. But not even on them but this lone wolf stereotype of a stereotype.
If you can just create electricity from the sun, then it means you can bypass the gritty survival of eating canned goods and just live like you used to.
And that kills the fantasy.
I haven't seen that kind, all the ones I've seen get solar panels as soon as they can afford them because living off generator power is expensive and sucks (and, unlike solar panels, would not serve you well in an apocalypse because you need to keep buying petrol for them). I don't think I've ever seen these anti-solar-panel homesteaders that you deal with. Variety in every community I suppose.
Whenever I hear homesteaders and trad wife people talk about how much better it is to do your own canning I remember my grandmother telling me about the canning days from her childhood and how she would help her grandmother can fresh fruit (we lived in orchard country) in a hot canning shed built for that purpose for days at a time in the middle of summer
Specifically about how it was hell on fucking earth and how her grandmother fucking hated every single second of it
The moment her grandmother could buy canned fruit easily in the supermarket? Never fucking canned a thing herself again and was so relieved and grateful that she would never have to again
Canning as a hobby in your kitchen? I can see that being fun
Canning because you have a fuck ton of fresh fruit coming off of your trees and if you don't can it all NOW you won't have any fruit for winter and it's all you do from sun up to sun down in the middle of summer?
That isn't a cute fun rewarding time. It's hard fucking labour
When all of us kids were finally grown and out of the house, my parents (finally) separated and sold their house, my mom used her half of the proceeds to rent a nice little apartment that is now filled with her diamond art and the other little things that make her happy.
(Tbh, I think she's the happiest she's ever been since I was born. She would probably agree.)
My dad, on the other hand, took his half and bought a tiny parcel of land with a rickety barn on it with the determination to do the homestead life. It's in the middle of nowhere and off the grid completely: no electricity, no sewage, and has a well to draw water from. It's been a little over a year since he moved onto it full time and he explains his life like this:
"It's simple — simply harder."
Every moment of his day, from the moment he gets up to the moment he goes to bed, there's something that needs built or repaired or prepped. Now that it's warmer, it's a race against the clock to grow and can his food and cut down enough wood for the winter because he lives on a mountain and that means snow comes in much earlier for him than everyone else. There's just not much downtime if he wants to be comfortable and, idk, alive, after the snowfall has blocked him in for weeks.
On top of that, something is always going wrong from the generator (decided to quit working in the dark in the middle of winter), to the barn he renovated to live in (mystery hole in roof discovered just as it starts to piss pour outside, along with a bat just chilling out and pissing off the cats). And it's not like he can just call a guy to come fix it because he's living quite a way from civilization, so dad has to do it all. He's always been the guy to call when you need something fixed, so it's whatever to him, but how many of these "preppers" have that kind of know-how?
Shit, my dad doesn't even have a mailbox bc the mail carrier says that putting one at the end of the little road to his property would be too dangerous, which it would be because it's located on a blind corner with no lights. And that road is nearly always foggy (from the low lying clouds) and driving it at night when you can't see far ahead and there's no street lighting is terrifying.
Despite everything, he likes his life and its inherent challenges, but all these internet personalities trying to sell it as something worth giving up all modern conveniences for because it's "simpler" make me uncomfortable because, no, it's not — and saying so is just downright stupid.
I've been meaning to make a post talking about my stroke because y'all got bits and pieces of the recovery but I never actually told the story of HOW it went down and the thing is the type of stroke I had is usually the type young people have and since having mine i've now heard multiple stories of people under 40 having very similar strokes and the scary thing is, is that they didn't get help right away. Because you're young and healthy and sure you feel weird but it'll pass right? but it doesn't, and it gets worse, and by the time you get to the hospital (some people literally take days to go) the deficits are worse and recovery is harder.
so here's a super long post about strokes in general, and mine in particular/what I went through.
So for strokes the signs are abbreviated BE FAST. Balance loss, Eyesight changes, Face drooping, Arm weakness, Speech difficulty, -> Time to call 911.
Had I known those MAYBE I would have figured it out but my symptoms were a little mixed. I was reading (fanfic!) in bed because it was a sunday morning and i had nothing pressing to do and suddenly got dizzy. I put my laptop aside because my eyes were blurring (Eyesight changes - symptom #1), and laid down, thinking it would pass, it didn't, it's a little vague how it progressed because I'd been having headaches and neckpain for about 3 weeks leading up to it so I was like 'idk is this a migraine?' (headaches can be a stroke symptom so symptom #2) but i got nauseous and eventually got up and to my utmost surprise I immediately fell over as if I was the drunkest of frat bros. The room literally spun before my eyes as I fell to the floor (Balance loss - symptom #3). I have had some Nights and I had never been that unsteady before. I crawled my way to the bathroom, threw up (nausea - not a common stroke symptom) , took 800mg of ibuprofen, and crawled back to bed.
if you know anything about ibuprofen you might know it's a mild blood thinner and that's a high dose. I may have inadvertently helped myself with that one. I was just feeling like shit and thinking 'idk this might help'
At this point I still thought we were still in Normal Land. Sure, it was a weird morning, but Surely There Was A Reason. (Yes There Was) Anyway, as I'm lying there willing my body to stop suffering I realize my arm is going numb (stroke symptom #4) and I switch positions, because weird, but it doesn't go away, and I gave it a good little while. I'm on a medication that can make my limbs tingle but it usually just does it to my fingers and it dissipates quickly but this wasn't dissipating, and then I realized one of my legs was also going numb. Then one side of my face is going numb.
(at the time I did not look in the mirror but I had a drooping eyelid - symptom #5)
Those all seem bad. I grab my computer and google 'when to go to the hospital for dizzyness' as that felt like the worst of my problems. and indeed the list I found highlighted that if you are also experiencing loss of balance, blurred vision, nausea, and limb numbness, you should see a doctor. That seems like far too many symptoms to be having all to be listed. I grab my phone (thankfully plugged in and by my bed), and start layering on more clothing because it's about 10 degrees out and i'm in a pajama dress. The very nice man at 911 talks with me and sends an ambulance, I tell him I don't think I can get out the front door of my building on my own and he asks if I can get to MY apartment door to which I say yes and he assures me that's fine they will have keys to my building.
(I have been since informed they love to chop down doors but no, I could get that far)
I wait by my door laying down on the ground and they arrive pretty quickly. They see to me in the hallway, which is more of a lobby in my building and the only place with room for me to lie down (I cannot stand unassisted at this point) they ask me a bunch of questions, take vitals, and ask me where I would like to be taken. Me, having never had to go to the fucking hospital in an emergency before, simply go 'wherever is close' because I again, I am having a stroke and do not have the wherewithal to think through these things.
A big firefighter helps me down the stairs (it's only a half flight and I still almost did not make it) and we get underway.
At the hospital they wheel me into triage and I mostly lie there gratefully and answer some questions and respond to some tests (grip strength, following a pen with my eyes, that sort of thing) and then I hear what is great when you've been at urgent care for two hours but what is Very Bad when you just arrived in an ambulance and that's 'She's next'. I jumped the line for a CT scan and an MRI. I was there less than ten minutes before I was actively being scanned. honestly closer to five.
my active symptoms seem to have been worse than some of the stories I've heard, not being able to walk AT ALL in particular, although some other are pretty equal (Footless Jo on youtube had a stroke around the same time I did of the same type and has discussed hers, she delayed going in despite the severity for a variety of reasons and it sounds like her recovery has been difficult) My recovery was pretty easy because i was actively being cared for and on blood thinners right away. I was pretty out of it in the beginning, but I was only in the hospital for 6 days and then in a rehab for another 4 to relearn how to walk and balance, then i was released unto the world and just spent time going to physical therapy and recovering for awhile. I was out of work for about 8 weeks total. I basically had the best outcome for a stroke. I recovered almost fully back to 100% (I'm about 2% less sure footed than I used to be, but it's rarely noticeable), my face still feels a little weird but has markedly improved so I live in hope it will eventually get back to normal. It massively sucked. But strokes can fuck you up for life and I came out a weird medical story to tell and have to take some extra medication now/precautions to take (i cannot do certain types of yoga, no weightlifting, no push ups, no going on rollercoasters.... things that could strain my neck essentially) but overall I escaped very lucky.
For the record, i'm unsure that taking a blood thinner of any kind if you suspect a stroke is a good idea - about 1 in 5 strokes are haemorrhagic strokes, that is, they're caused by a brain bleed, not a bloot clot. A blood thinner will make that worse. I'm unsure if these numbers apply to strokes in younger people.
But thank you for sharing - even if one does know BE FAST (or, even more if one knows only the older FAST) - it can be really difficult to recognise these sorts of things when you're actually having an odd experience, 'cause you knew it as abstract and outwardly-observable facts? So sharing a description of what it could actually feel like is really important. Thank you.
Happy Moon Landing Eve! Remember to leave out milk and cookies for Buzz Aldrin and Neil Armstrong, and don’t let Michael Collins convince you to prank NASA!
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