[starchid]

star⭐️ + orchid🌸 = starchid

[contemptible-scoundrel]

my buddy brings her angel girlfriend to the function, I spend the whole time refusing to look at or even acknowledge her existence, because I am a staunch atheist and dont believe in that nonsense. she starts to throw things at my head to get my attention and between volleys of marbles and kitchen utensils I grunt "swamp gas. aurora borealis. probably a weather balloon.youre seeing things"

[contemptible-scoundrel]

another day, I greet my friend at the door, I look over her shoulder and raise an eyebrow, "I see you've brought the electromagnetic phenomena again,"

[itsjunetime]

clowngirl getting an orchiectomy and the surgeon just keeps removing ball after ball after ball after ball after

[estrogenesis-vaporeongelion]

clown nurse standing by solemnly adding each successive ball to the ones she's already juggling

[spiribia]

Creative workaround for those who haven’t seen it

[silly-filly]

Someone in the reddit comments made a similar dress inspired by it and posted a pattern with it!

[plaguedocboi]

I think the absolute worst term to come out of this age of pseudo-scientific puritanical bullshit has got to be “dopamine addiction”. “You’re addicted to feeling good and having fun” bitch yeah???? What else are we on this earth to do??

[soldier-of-death]

letting yourself be calm or bored and not constantly consuming media or keeping busy can be good for you.

having tea or coffee or whatever drink you like while just sitting with your thoughts should be something a person can and will do regularly.

[nesting-dreams]

i feel dopamine when I do those things. They make me happy just sitting there with a drink though.

[plaguedocboi]

Getting up on my gay little soapbox again to remind everyone that prev is correct. Dopamine is not a chemical that is only released when you are overstimulated by Media Consumption or whatever. You can get a dopamine hit from sitting calmly in the dark and watching the rain. It is a pleasure chemical, not a Capitalism Chemical. Stop conflating “pleasure” with “being constantly busy and unable to tear yourself away from scrolling social media”. I hate social media and I love being alone with my thoughts. If you’re unable to experience joy in everyday life you probably need to be on antidepressants. That’s not me trying to be dismissive I’m speaking from experience.

[thepromiscuousfinger]

[smoothjazzdigit]

Have you guys seen that clip

Go off Kermit

[juliathefacesofevil]

we're just normal men

[oddjoblin]

Why the heck is this dude trying to confirm if the frog puppet is hetrosexual???

[karnalesbian]

assessing the situation before he shoots his shot

[defilerwyrm]

Happy Pride to Kermit the Frog, questioning king

[rkfisherphotography]

Sandhill Cranes in the fog

[apjvff]

if you were a mouse, these will be the dinosaurs…

[thequeenoftheentiregoddamnworld]

Hey, hey, look me in the eyes when I tell you this okay? The whole "do trans women or trans men have it worse?" debate going on right now is the most obvious CIA bullshit on earth cause honestly we've both got it pretty shitty and fighting each other isn't helping anyone

[cleo-fox]

Writing tips:

“You feel the bulge in his pants” - implies that you are feeling some guy’s penis, may be sexy depending on context

“You feel the bugle in his pants” - implies that this guy has a military horn in his pants, invites confusing questions like why does he have that and how big are his pockets

[maple-seed]

Both options convey that he's horny

[cleo-fox]

How dare you be funnier than me on my own post

[dafterwho]

“You feel the Bugles™️ in his pants” he has tasty corn chip snacks in there

[the-walrus-squad]

The beluga in his pants can be a throbbing hypersexual animal, make a horn-like noise, AND refer to a (very expensive) tasty snack.

[monster1994]

happy june everybody i hope you get fucked and/or sucked this month

[kazokuhouou]

what if we don't wanna be?

[monster1994]

then i hope for peace

[wheelie-sick]

sometimes people experiencing psychosis and/or mania will come up to you on the street and talk in confusing or upsetting ways. your job is to either have a regular human-to-human conversation with that person or politely leave. your job is not to call 911. do not call 911. you might kill that person if you call 911.

[wheelie-sick]

I don't even have the energy to screenshot and respond to your tags- what the actual fuck is wrong with you? "the cops are scared and rightfully so" "mental health calls are the scariest for cops" OH so this isn't about the safety of psychotic & manic people this is about piggy feelings?

and no, actually, this is not USA specific and no, actually, people from other countries should not ignore this post. police violence and sanism weren't invented in the US and they are certainly not unique to here. if you (or anyone) thinks that this bullshit doesn't happen elsewhere then you are not listening.

[headspace-hotel]

cops r Some Guy with a Gun

do we want Some Guy with a Gun in this situation? answer is usually "NO"

[tinyyellowflowers-blog]

After school care pulled me aside about my child dropping an f-bomb “without remorse” and I put on my concerned face and nodded a bunch.

Apparently he was building something with a younger kid “who really looks up to him and is just starting to make friends” and said “Hey, you’re really fucking good at this.” which is, in my estimation, really a parenting victory.

[tinyyellowflowers-blog]

I absolutely failed at doing this:

[cheesefags]

2-YEAR CHEDDAR

from GRAFTON VILLAGE

I usually try to review cheeses virginally - that is, ones that I’ve never had before. In this case, this is a cheddar I’ve had many times before. But I couldn’t leave it off the blog, what with its obvious appeal to leather and rubber fetishists.

As far as cheddars go, Grafton’s 2-year aged isn’t going to shock you. It’s mild, light on the salt, with a slightly sweet and grassy flavour. It’s got a nice texture. It’s dense, more moist than I expected, and smooth.

So what is the deal with the gummi suit on this cheese anyway? Well, cheese has obviously been around a lot longer than fridges. Fresh cheeses like mozzarella are too moist to last very long outside of a cold place (bacteria and fungi do so love damp places), though I don’t think anyone was too mad about eating that stuff quickly. But cheeses that have been aged (and dried) more have some more preservation options, which is where cheese wax comes in. The wax is a physical barrier, stopping fungal spores from landing, and also blocks moisture and air, making the cheese a pretty unfriendly place to grow. Even drier cheeses can be bandaged in cheesecloth and then slathered in lard to preserve them while allowing some ventilation.

I gotta admit: hot wax isn’t really my thing. But cheesecloth bondage and grease… it has potential.

[dumbpuppyfag]

this site used to be awesome

[orteil42]

given the current climate this pride especially i feel i must mention that i love my trans friends, i stand with trans people in the fight against transphobic legislation and those who would enforce it, and this blog is not a good place for you to be if you do not vibe with that

[twinktorturer]

the most sexual emotion a man can feel is fear

[browsingfreakshit]

Now why would Tumblr user twinktorturer say something like this

[glittervermin]