“And all those years of hatred were forgotten in the love of a minute.”
Summary: Everyone is born with a special shaped necklace that's half of a unique shape. The other half? It belongs to your soulmate. You don't believe in soulmates. So you keep yours hidden- until an accident leads you to find out Lee Felix, the person you hate most, is your soulmate.
CW: Angst, grunge, family issues, fluff, smut-free, soulmates au
⟡°. ⋆༺☾𖤓༻⋆. ⟡°. ⋆༺☾𖤓༻⋆. °⟡ ⟡°. ⋆༺☾𖤓༻⋆.
You look up from your oddly familiar K-drama to see Felix standing in the doorway, his figure framed by shadow, his eyes distant—cold, unreadable.
“What?” You spring to your feet, the motion sudden and frantic, your stomach twisting violently as his words carve themselves into you.
“I’m leaving,” he repeats, already turning away, his footsteps retreating before you can catch your breath.
You run after him, but the hallway stretches impossibly long, bending and warping as if the world itself is pulling him away from you. With every step, he grows farther, until he’s nothing more than a fading phantom, just beyond your reach.
You stop, breathless- until your necklace tugs at your chest, a sharp pull that drags you forward, collapsing the distance in an instant. He’s close now. So close it hurts.
You grab his hand and gasp, releasing him immediately.
So cold it burns, blistering your palms with a pain so sharp it steals the air from your lungs.
Felix turns back to you. His eyes aren’t cold anymore- just empty, like black voids swallowing all light.
He extends his hand towards you.
He says nothing, but his eyes say everything.
Your hand throbs, still screaming with agony. You know if you take his hand, it will hurt you again.
“I can’t,” you whisper, your voice barely there.
And then he dissolves into the darkness, fading until only the hollow space where he stood remains—an absence that lingers, heavy and suffocating.
You scream his name over and over again, arm outstretched, reaching for everything and nothing, your hand still aching with the ghost of his frozen touch.
Your necklace tightens around your throat, constricting, choking the breath from you until stars burst behind your eyes…
It shatters against the floor, fragments scattering like fallen stars.
Broken. Lifeless. Hollow.
You wake with a violent gasp, drenched in cold sweat, your heart hammering wildly against your ribs. Your chest rises and falls too fast, too shallow, each breath tangled in the remnants of the nightmare. Warm tears streak down your cheeks, blurring the world.
Your senses feel distant, dulled, drifting somewhere far away-so far that you barely register when someone- Felix- sits you up, steady hands rubbing slow circles into your back, grounding you until you can finally see again. Feel again. Think again.
Your ears ring, the sound overwhelming, almost drowning out Felix’s soft voice beside you.
“It’s okay,” he murmurs gently. “It was just a nightmare.”
When the fog in your head finally clears, you turn toward him. His blonde hair falls messily around his face, freckles glowing softly in the sunlight spilling through the massive windows. His brows are drawn tight, eyes heavy with concern.
Then the memories of last night rush back all at once. Delicious brownies melting in your mouth, a terrible k-drama you couldn’t take seriously, warm arms wrapped around you…
And then it hits you like a burst of cold air that you’re not on his couch anymore.
“I—I’m so sorry,” you rush out, tugging at the covers. “I didn’t mean to—”
Felix doesn’t let you finish. He catches your wrist and pulls you toward him, arms wrapping securely around your waist, his cheek settling against your shoulder.
“I asked you something,” he mumbles. “Are you okay?”
The image of him disappearing—the way your body froze while your heart screamed—feels too vivid, too raw to dismiss as a dream.
You wanted to go with him. Lord, you wanted to reach out so badly.
But his hand had been so cold. You can still feel it now, even awake, even held safely in Felix’s arms.
And the pain of that realization is sharp, real.
“I’m fine,” you lie, the words bitter on your tongue.
“Good,” he says, tightening his hold just slightly.
You pull away from his suffocating grasp and turn to face him, messy hair framing your tear-streaked face.
The house is quiet as you sit facing across from Felix at the kitchen table, the oversized t-shirt he lent you warm and soft against your skin.
You stare at him as he scrolls through his phone, absently stirring your cereal, willing yourself to ask him the question gnawing at your mind.
He glances up and catches you staring at him.
“Is there something wrong?” he asks, raising an eyebrow.
You tilt your head. “Why?.”
His brows crease in confusion. “Huh?”
“Why did I…” You pause, letting the unspoken words hang cautiously in the air.
Why did I wake up in your bed?
Felix somehow reads your mind, because he averts his eyes from yours and smiles shyly. “You seemed uncomfortable on the couch.”
“Oh.” You try to focus yourself on stirring your cereal, now soggy from being left in the bowl for too long.
“Are you always so clingy in your sleep?”
Your head snaps up and heat floods your cheeks. “What?”
Felix is smirking, leaving you uncertain whether he’s teasing or serious. Instead of elaborating, though, he lets out a quiet laugh and returns to his phone, the smirk still lingering.
That wasn’t your last sleepover with Felix. As the weeks pass by, your walls come crumbling down with every smile, every hug, every moment. The time you spend together becomes an escape from reality, from your mom, from life. Every moment, every unspoken promise, every whisper in the dark slowly breaks your carefully built walls.
Your necklace no longer feels like a chain, but more like a reminder.
A reminder that you belong to Felix and he belongs to you.
Some nights, the nightmare returns- the endless hallway, the broken necklace, the hollow eyes.
And every time you wake up screaming he’s there, comforting you, holding you gently, wiping away your tears, reminding you it’s just a dream- and he’s there.
He never asks what the nightmare is about.
“How come I’ve never met your parents?”
“My parents?”
You’re lying in his backyard side by side, grass cool beneath you, staring up at the sky painted with stars.
It feels ironic how they only shine when everything else is swallowed up by darkness.
Felix turns to face you, propping himself up on one arm. “Every time I'm at your house it’s just us.”
You never told Felix about your parents- he never asked.
His parents are amazing, both his mom and his dad, and yours…
You don’t look at Felix. “My dad left when I was little,” you say quietly. “And my mom is just never around.”
Your gaze stays fixed on the night sky as you trace your favorite constellations. Ursa Major, Orion, Cassiopeia, Polaris. The stars glow softly, suspended in moonlight.
“Y/n… I'm so sorry,” Felix says, his voice thick with sympathy.
He’s apologizing as if it’s his fault. Apologizing as if it will fix every crack, as if it can somehow undo what’s already been done.
Apologizing as if it will bring your dad back.
You don’t really remember the day your dad left. You were only seven. The memory is like a foggy window, no matter how hard you try to look through it, everything is blurry and distant, far from your reach.
You just woke up one morning and he was… gone. No goodbye. No explanation.
He just left silently, his absence haunting you like a ghost until you felt like you were suffocating.
The only clear memory, the only break in the fog, is your mom- sitting in a corner sobbing. Her soulmate necklace wasn’t around her neck anymore. It was cradled in her hands, dull and cold.
Soulmate necklaces don’t just represent existence- they represent recognition, connection, choice.
And your father chose to leave.
He chose to stop loving your mom. He chose to be free of the crushing weight of unrequited love. So your mom’s necklace broke- along with her heart. Along with her memories.
And that’s why you hate everything about soulmates. You hate the sociological concept, the forced devotion and intimacy. But more than anything, you hate the way that people can still leave. You hate that even though you’re bound together forever by metal and elements, if you abandon fate, the necklaces are detached and your fate is sealed. Forever.
And as you explain this to Felix, tears blur your vision, the stars dissolving into a haze just like your memories.
“I know I'm difficult,” you choke out. “I know it’s hard for you to love me. I’m just scared.”
But this time, you really look at him. His freckles. His soft, blonde hair falling gently around his face. The crease between his brows. His eyes glassy with emotion as they search yours.
And the words that have been aching inside of you spill out, raw and trembling.
“Please don’t leave me, Felix.”
He pulls you to his chest, softly kissing your tears away as he strokes your hair.
“I’ll never leave you,” he whispers. “I promise.”
When you get home the next morning, a surprise is waiting.
She’s standing in the kitchen like she never left, arms crossed tight against her chest. She’s always been like this—coming and going, disappearing for days, sometimes weeks—but this time feels heavier. Wrong.
She’s been gone for two weeks this time.
Two weeks of silence. Two weeks of loneliness. Two weeks of wondering if she’d even come back at all.
“Where have you been all night?” she demands, eyes sharp, voice already raised.
“Where have you been for the last two weeks?” you fire back. You don’t even recognize your own voice—low, shaking, angry in a way that scares you.
For just a second, her face falters. You see it: the guilt, the hesitation. Then it’s gone, replaced by anger like armor. “I know you found your soulmate.”
Your heart slams so hard it hurts. “What?”
You never told her about Felix. You knew exactly how it would end. You knew she’d tell you that you’re making a mistake. You knew she would twist it, ruin it, make it ugly.
And for once in your life, you’re right.
“I’ve seen you wearing his T-shirts,” she says. “I’ve seen your phone wallpaper. You think I don’t notice anything?”
Your throat tightens. Those were supposed to be safe things. Small things.
The words are flat. Final.
Your breath catches like you’ve been punched. “I— I can’t just—”
“Do you want what happened to me to happen to you?” she cuts in, voice suddenly loud, almost desperate.
The words that you’ve been trying to avoid. Trying not to think about.
“Felix is different, Mom,” you say, even though your voice is shaking now. “He’s not like—”
“That’s what I said about your father,” she snaps. Her eyes are glossy now, and that somehow makes it worse. “I thought he was different.”
You hate that she always drags the past into the present, always bringing your father into this, always comparing everyone to him. But you do the same thing.
Maybe not out loud, but inside, deep in your heart, the past is there- clawing its way back out until it rips your heart and breaks free.
“You don’t understand how fast it falls apart,” your mother says more quietly now. “One day you’re in love, and the next day you’re alone, cleaning up a mess you never thought would be yours.”
“I’m already alone every single damn day,” you say before you can stop yourself. “You leave all the time.”
Silence slams down between you.
Her mouth opens, then closes. Her shoulders sag just a little, like something heavy has finally settled.
“I’m trying to protect you,” she says. “I don’t want you to get hurt.”
You shake your head, tears burning behind your eyes. “But you are hurting me.”
And for the first time, she doesn’t have an answer.
“I love him,” you say, the realization of your feelings towards Felix raw and real now. “And I’m not breaking up with him.”
Her jaw tightens. “Everyone leaves, y/n. Everyone.”
And it hurts- because deep down, you know she’s right.
Felix knows something's wrong.
Your mom’s words had sunk deep into your mind, burning and haunting you every time you see him .
You don’t lean into him like you usually do. You don’t smile. You don’t ask for his hoodie or brush your fingers against his when you walk side by side. You keep space between you, like there’s an invisible line you’re scared to cross.
He doesn't say anything- until you’re walking home from school a week later, pouring rain slapping against the pavement, clouds heavy and gray in the dull evening.
“Hey,” he says softly. “Did something happen?”
You shake your head too fast. “No.”
It’s a lie, and you both know it.
“You’ve barely texted,” he continues, careful now, like he’s approaching something fragile. “I was worried.”
You hear her voice instead of his.
I know you found your soulmate. You’re setting yourself up for heartbreak.
“I’ve just been tired,” you say. You don’t look at him.
Felix frowns. “Did I do something?”
That’s the worst part. He always asks like that—like he’d take the blame if it meant fixing things.
“No,” you say quickly. “It’s not you.”
Then why does your chest hurt like it’s breaking?
You stop walking. Felix stops too, turning to face you fully now.
“Talk to me,” he says. “Please.”
Your mom’s face flashes in your mind. Her tired eyes. Her bitterness. The way she said your dad’s name like it still tasted like betrayal.
One day you’re in love. The next day you’re alone.
“I think…” Your voice cracks, and you hate yourself for it. You clear your throat and try again. “I think we should slow down.”
Felix blinks. “Slow down?”
“Yeah,” you rush on. “We moved really fast, right? And maybe that wasn’t smart.”
You step back. Physically. Deliberately.
Felix’s face falls in a way that makes your stomach twist.
“Are you starting to regret this?” he asks quietly.
You stiffen. “Regret what?”
“Giving the whole soulmates thing a chance,” he says. “Giving me a chance.”
“I just don’t want to wake up one day and realize I ruined myself over something that was never going to last.”
Felix’s eyes search yours. “Is that really what you think we are? Just soulmates?”
You think about how safe you feel with him. How he laughs with his whole chest. How he looks at you like you’re something good.
And you think about your mom—alone, angry, hurt, warning you like love is a trap you can never escape once it closes.
“I don’t care that we’re soulmates, y/n,” his voice is rising now. “I care about you. I love you.” He’s yelling now, the sound of the rain and his voice piercing your ears. “Isn’t that enough?”
You don’t answer fast enough.
His jaw tightens. “Do you want this?”
“I don’t know,” you whisper.
That’s the moment something breaks.
Felix nods slowly, like he’s bracing himself. “Okay.”
Not I’ll wait. Not we’ll figure it out. Just okay.
He’s finally fed up with your hesitation. How you always pull away from his lips first. How you isolate yourself from him instead of telling him when you’re upset.
Guilt floods you, hot and choking. You want to tell him you’re scared, not done. Tell him that you love him so, so much, so much it hurts-
But love is terrifying. Love takes trust.
And no matter how many times he promised he would never leave, deep down you know that promises are meaningless.
He takes a step back this time. And the distance feels final.
When he turns to leave, you don’t stop him. You tell yourself that this is the right decision and that you’re just trying to protect yourself from heartbreak. That leaving hurts less when you choose it first.
You let yourself linger for a moment as the rain comes down hard.
Cold droplets strike the top of your head and run into your eyes, blurring the world as your clothes cling to your skin.
You turn- for one final look at Felix, one last reminder of his warmth in the cold, pouring rain…
Just in time to see him step into a car's path.
“He’s in a coma. A bad one. We don’t know if he’ll ever wake up.”
The words are spoken gently, like they’re trying not to hurt you. That almost makes it worse. They don’t sound like an ending, but they feel like one.
My fault. My fault. My fault.
The words repeat in your head until they blur together, until they stop sounding like language and start sounding like truth. They fill every quiet space, every breath, every second you’re awake. There is no room for anything else.
You shouldn’t have exploded at Felix. You should have kept your mouth shut.
You shouldn’t have let him walk away.
You don’t know how long you’ve been sitting in the hospital waiting room.
Time doesn’t move the way it used to. It stretches thin, fragile, like it might snap if you touch it.
They have people they love to go home to.
People that they can touch and talk to and tell them they love them.
He’s here, unconscious, lying limp in a hospital bed hooked up to wires and breathing through a mask.
You know you should go home.
But every time you close your eyes the memory comes flooding back, drowning you until you can’t breathe.
The way time had stopped as his body was suspended in the air, before landing on his head, a broken, bloody mess on the rain-soaked pavement.
That image is carved into you now. You don’t think it will ever leave.
Running to him, shaking him, screaming his name like it might pull him back. Tears falling onto his face as you begged him to wake up while he lay there, still and unresponsive.
The guilt settles deeper when you remember holding his cold hand in the ambulance, your fingers wrapped around his as the paramedics tried to bring him back. You held on like letting go meant losing him forever.
You wonder if he knew you were there. If he knew you were holding on to him, if he knew you were sorry.
You sit in the empty waiting room for too long, starving and exhausted, staring at the fluorescent lights until everything feels washed out and unreal.
Until your mom finally comes after 25 missed calls and takes you home.
She doesn’t ask how you feel, or if you’re okay.
She drives in silence, eyes fixed on the road, hands gripping the steering wheel tightly.
The silence between you is thick and suffocating, filled with everything she doesn't say.
I warned you. I was right.
At home, all you do is sleep. Sleeping helps you escape.
Escape the thoughts you can’t outrun while you’re awake.
Your phone feels empty without his good morning texts, without proof that he’s still out there somewhere, breathing, moving.
Your bed feels too big. Too empty. You miss the way he used to lie beside you, absentmindedly running his fingers through your hair, whispering quietly until you fell asleep to the sound of his voice.
Your lips feel cold without his pressed against them, warm and comforting.
Your necklace feels heavier than it ever has, a constant pressure against your chest, a reminder you can’t take off no matter how badly you want to forget.
You lie in bed, numb from crying and shaking from hunger, your body slowly wearing itself down and losing itself the same way your heart already has.
You spent so much time pushing him away. Hating him. Hurting him. Convincing yourself you didn’t care.
And now the space he left behind is unbearable—like a sky without stars, like standing in a room where something important has been ripped out, leaving nothing but the phantom of an echo.
He was warmth. He was comfort.
Now everything feels distant and hollow, stripped from color and meaning.
And still, there is hope.
Small and fragile, but still there.
You cling to it like it’s the last thing keeping you alive, because it is.
He’s still alive, still breathing. It’s just a coma, you tell yourself. He’ll wake up. He has to.
You know you have no right to feel this way. You’re the one that pushed him away, who stood in the pouring rain and told him you don’t trust him and he’s not worth it.
You let your fear that he would leave consume you so much to the point that you left him.
It seems that you’re no different than your father.
Your mom stops feeling sorry for you and forces you to go to school.
You wander the hallways without direction, your body moving while your mind stays somewhere else entirely.
You hear the whispers and you feel the stares of people wondering what’s wrong with you, where Felix is.
Instead, you discover that it’s possible to exist without really being there.
You breathe air, you speak full sentences to people, you show up to class.
But everything feels empty. Every word, every step, every heartbeat.
Everything is empty without him.
Days blur into weeks. Weeks blur into months.
You miss him so much it physically hurts- your body is fighting to survive, while your heart is trying to die.
He’s alive, but he isn’t here.
It feels as if he might as well be dead.
You’re sitting on a hard plastic chair that bites into your skin, your hand intertwined with Felix’s limp one.
His fingers feel like ice.
You listen to his breath—slow, soft, but still there.
The hospital room is so quiet you can hear your own heart.
You fill the silence with your voice, hoping it reaches wherever he is.
“I used to hate you. I hated how happy and popular you were, and I hated how blonde your hair was. Everyone knows you bleach it.” You laugh softly at the memories. They feel so far away now. “When our necklaces connected, I was so, so pissed. Of course the one person I hated more than anything was my fate.”
You swallow, tightening your grip on his hand. “But Felix, you never gave up. You pulled every single one of my strings and pushed harder and harder every day until I finally snapped and went out with you.”
You stare at the floor, guilt flooding you. “And even when I was difficult, even when I treated you badly, even when I thought I was hopeless, you stayed. You didn’t love me because we’re soulmates, you loved me because you chose to.”
But seeing him like this—lying there, so small and still—makes something deep inside you just snap.
“I don’t believe in soulmates. And I don’t think I ever will.” You whisper the next words like a forbidden promise. I believe in you, Felix. I love you.”
You promise yourself you’ll tell him that if he ever wakes up.
You sit on the floor of your room, staring at the wall with blank, tired eyes. Five assignments lie scattered in front of you, unfinished and untouched.
You’re exhausted, your grades have fallen apart, and you haven’t showered or eaten for what feels like a long time.
You don’t care about anything anymore.
A bitter laugh slips out of you, hollow and sharp.
You’re the one who fell in love.
Because in the end, you pushed Felix away and now he is in a coma.
You spent years building walls to protect yourself, tried so hard not to end up like your mom and avoid her reality.
The two words glow on your phone screen like sunlight breaking through the clouds after months of darkness.
Two words that shatter your numbness and make your heart lurch back to life.
You jump up out of your seat in the middle of class and bolt out the door, ignoring the threats of your English teacher and the gasps of people in the hallways.
You’ve never run this fast in your life.
You run until your lungs burn and the street noise turns to a hum. You don’t see the cars swerving past you- you only see him.
You keep running as you push open the hospital doors and run up too many flights of stairs for you to count.
You only stop when you finally reach his room, sweating and breathless, strands of hair flying loose, willing yourself to open the door.
Awake. Alive. Breathing. Standing.
Staring blankly out the window, fidgeting with his IV cord, blonde hair gently falling over a white bandage around his head.
He’s not a dream. He’s real.
Your body moves on its own. You run to him, locking your arms around his neck. You hide your face against his skin, letting the tears fall hot and fast.
“I’m so sorry,” you sob. “It’s all my fault.”
He doesn't pull away, but he doesn't hold you back.
You pull away to look at him, reaching for his face, searching for the boy you know.
But his eyes are blank. Empty. Confused.
Your heart sinks, and your hands drop to your sides.
The silence grows heavy, thick enough to drown in.
He’s mad. He hates you. You deserve it.
You brace yourself for him to voice your thoughts- for him to tell you he hates you and he never wants to see you again.
But instead, he tilts his head, frowning, and looks at you as if he is studying a photograph he doesn’t remember taking.
And then his voice drops, barely there, but clear.
“I’m sorry… who are you?”
And then everything falls into evanescence as your necklace slips from your neck and falls to the floor with a sharp, final clatter.
⟡°. ⋆༺☾𖤓༻⋆. ⟡°. ⋆༺☾𖤓༻⋆. °⟡ ⟡°. ⋆༺☾𖤓༻⋆.
a/n: this fic is complete. Some things are meant to end unfinished. I'll leave the rest to the silence between the lines. I’m sorry I couldn’t be kinder.