I am So Fucking Pissed I'm resorting to this, but if it means protecting my damn privacy, I'll make the fucking machine eat its own tail like the ouro-fucking-boros.
Click Read More for instructions on bypassing the google age requirement.
So, if and when you get the age verification bullshit from google and youtube, DO NOT FUCKING GIVE YOUR ID/EMAIL/CREDIT CARD/WHATEVER. Use thispersondoesnotexist or this-person-does-not-exist to generate an older person (age requirements differ for different regions, but the USA is 18+ requirement, so choose someone OBVIOUSLY over 18). The first website is a refresh-to-generate site, while the second one allows you to input specifications such as age, gender, ethnicity (just pick white...), etc.
INSTRUCTIONS
When the age verification notification pops up, follow the below instructions. For those who ignored it/can't find it, go to this help page and scroll down to "Verify you’re old enough to manage your account", you will see a link to "verify your age" (image below)
BEFORE MOVING TO STEP THREE: THERE IS SPECIFIC REQUIREMENTS FOR YOUR GENERATED SELFIE
Must face camera,
No glasses,
BRIGHT ROOM. I cannot stress this enough, open ALL blinds, get artificial light, otherwise you get the "too dim" message. This is the trickiest part of the selfie bypass method.
You will only be allowed to use the front facing camera of your phone, so get in position to point your phone cam parallel to the image on your computer or tablet screen, and make sure YOU are able see if it's working/if you need to adjust.
"person" must look VERY OBVIOUSLY 18+.
Ideally choose a generated image of an elderly person, or a male with an obvious beard.
SAVE/CAPTURE MORE THAN ONE IMAGE AS BACKUPS.
For the website that allows you to set parameters, you will need to take a screenshot via the app on your computer. The site blocks right click screenshoting and it will have a watermark unless you pay for a nonwater mark version.
2. Select "take a selfie" for your method of verification. DO NOT SELECT ANYTHING ELSE. Verifying via your email might seem like a safe route, but it still allows Google to see EVERY website you ever visit, what you do on that website, and collect passwords, usernames, and other information.
3. Agree/continue with this method, and you will get a QR code that you'll need to scan via your phone camera. Follow the link after scanning.
4. Allow the site to use your camera (NOTE: I had to exit and re-scan the QR code due to a slight glitch, but the second scan worked just fine).
YOU WILL ONLY BE ALLOWED TO USE YOUR FRONT-FACING CAMERA FOR THIS.
5. Get your image in the scanning circle. The circle's border will gradually turn green as it scans and verifies. KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE PROMPTS ABOVE THE CIRCLE. These prompts could be urging you to center the face in the circle, say it's too dime, ask you to face the camera, or to remove glasses.
6. Continue trying numerous images or those getting very close to completion. It can take a while, and you MUST be in a brightly lit area, for the love of god. Keep trying. You will likely get a page that say it can't verify your age, but click "retry" and KEEP. TRYING.
7. When the image is successfully captured, you're golden! No more age verification bullshit from google. Close out the tab on your phone, and on your computer. Don't worry about the page on the computer staying on the QR code page, it doesn't change when age is verified, but it worked.
WHAT HAPPENS IF I DON'T VERIFY AGE?
Not doing all this makes google assume you're under age and you are locked into "safe browsing" mode, which impacts websites you visit, websites you can see when searching (aka excluding mature/percieved as mature websites from your search), and what youtube shows you. I'm not joking.
This will be the ONLY FUCKING TIME I will ever use genai, and against itself to boot. Fucking make it eat its own tail.
You can find similar instructions via Reddit (which is where I found this, but no step by step instructions).
If you are very against genai (I am too, but I panicked and needed a solution ASAP), there is a workaround where you can still get a fake face and not use genai.
Go to places like Fiverr and search for photoshop experts. You're very likely to find someone who can take a picture of either, A, yourself to alter beyond recognition, or B, a face picture from a magazine or online article. You can then use that image as the verification bypass, rather than a generated image.
Pros: You give genai a massive middle finger (and if you get your own face photoshopped, you're still TECHNICALLY submitting your own face, soooo...)
Cons: You will need to pay someone to do this--unless you know someone who does decent photoshop work and is willing to do it for free.
I wish I had done this myself, but like I said, I panicked and was given the whole "you have X days to verify your age before we assume you're a fetus" notification, so that sort of trigger my flight response. I'd rather have supported a photoshop artist than gone with the ai slop...
Simply get someone to photoshop your own (or a rando's) face to be basically unrecognizable, ideally looking older, maybe with gray hair and wrinkles added.
Remember, trying to trick the face recognition is TRICKY, so I recommend commissioning numerous photoshopped images of yourself/randos to be safe.
I can't believe I finished this in a night, my poor arm and hand are TREMBLING from all that!
Anywho, this is an idea I had in my head for a WHILE now, but was only recently prompted to start again after seeing an ask wondering about what Al summoning someone other than Rosie, and I just think it's a neat concept.
For this specific AU, Alastor's human circumstances varied, though all mostly have a commonality that he had to give up on radio due to needing to support his ailing mother and finding big breaks elsewhere.
Here, he became the chauffeur and assistant for to wealthy dance instructor and retired dancer with skeletons of her own, which Al was all too happy to help hide. She was a very strict and rough handed with students and peers alike, something Alastor admired and respected. He took lessons from her when she noticed his natural grace and coordination, and his tendency to dance when alone with some music. He ultimately died not long after his mother, whereupon he succumbed to a lot of internalized anger and murdered the nurse he had left in charge of his mother while he worked, who had been out at a speakeasy when she was supposed to be caring for his mother. He later spotted her at one of his madame's ballet events in the audience, lured her backstage, and violently murdered her in revenge. A fire broke out in the theater during the altercation, where he sustained injuries and ultimately burned alive.
Sometime between his mother's death and the fire, he summoned Carmilla. Consumed with grief and anger, he sold his soul in exchange for power in hell. Carmilla promised to "make him the most powerful weapon in hell". And so she did.
Al was quickly picked up by Carmilla when he landed in hell, and thus began their somewhat odd partnership. He essentially has the same job as he did when he was alive, but leaning more towards open murder and threat.
He primarily acts as the bodyguard and escort of Carmilla's daughters, Clara and Odette, of whom he is VERY protective of and allegedly close to. He is often called Carmilla's "attack dog" due to her siccing him on rivals, traitors, and enemies alike.
More under the cut!
MISC NOTES:
Alastor become oddly very quiet after he lost his shot as a radio host, and he maintains that eerie silence even in hell.
The muzzle over his mouth is more for safety than for actual restraint. Due to wrath being his dominant sin, he has a much higher affinity for fire magic, which can sometimes go out of control. It's mostly concentrated in his mouth, his hands being secondary and more easy to control.
He is armed with angelic steel claws, spear heads, and any number of small weapons hiding on him or in dimensional pockets.
His antlers are also coated in angelic steel.
His outfit is a bit of a nod to Carmilla's ballet shoe ribbons, and a straight jacket.
When not working for Carmilla, he is ultimately free to do as he pleases--provided he is not actively working against Carmilla or her daughters. He ultimately spends most of his time at dance clubs/halls, bars, music halls, or hunting Sinners (with or without Carmilla's prompting).
His temper is much higher and slightly less controlled than OG Alastor's.
His magic is still voodoo-adjacent, but more inclined towards fire. His shadow magic is a bit more limited to teleporting and forming shields and pocket dimensions. He is a much more physical fighter than OG Alastor due to training and the weaponry on his body.
Carmilla is fond of him, but rarely if ever shows it; choosing instead to show exasperation at his antics and occasional backtalk. She is ultimately a very fair owner of his soul though, and only cares about her orders being followed and him keeping her daughters safe.
He still doesn't much care for dogs, having been attacked by one as a child that nearly left one of his legs permanently damaged.
He does not have/use a cane.
Rosie has more than once tried to poach him from Carmilla (all for the love of the game, of course!).
He is technically a qualifier as an Overlord due to his power and the amount of souls he has accumulated, but ultimately chooses to remain as Carmilla's right hand where he does not need to comply with so many rules or restrictions. Or paperwork.
He does not have cannibalistic urges, but is not afraid to bite and rip out chunks of people should the occasional call for it.
A more respectable title he has earned is "The Furnace of Carmine", due to there being rumors of his fire being so potent, it can not only melt down angelic steel, but also infuse it with demonic magic. These rumors are unconfirmed.
He is unusually hot to the touch, even for a wrath Sinner.
He's still a fantastic cook.
He is more open to newer things (music, dance styles, and some tech) than OG Alastor.
He speaks fluent (european) french, having been rigorously tutored by his former madame.
He's somewhat claustrophobic and hates being restrained.
Vox still simps for him and has approached Carmilla at least once to ask what the price for him would be. He was ultimately thrown out with his own shoe in his screen.
He never met Vincent until he became Vox and they had their first encounter at an Overlord meeting.
He thinks Vox is pathetic and easily manipulated.
Odette and Clara adore him, and the feeling is mutual.
His deer traits are still apparent due to his consistent hunting to provide food for himself and his mother before he was hired on by his madame, who would later request he teacher her to hunt. "Such a fiery woman, my madame. Born into privilege, but she had the grit and callouses of a woman who clawed her way up."
As for the hotel...I'm not sure if he'd be going to help it due to Carmilla having no interest in it. In the AU, regardless of who he summons (besides Rosie), he has no reason to stay at the hotel or help Charlie. But I DO imagine that Charlie, realizing she needs more influential help, does request a meeting with the Overlords to gain their support, where she meets Alastor, and likely tries to have him get a good word in to Carmilla. He is charmed and amused by her, but ultimately takes the "back stage" role, and only comes out to "set the stage on fire", if you will.
he does likely join in on the battle at the hotel against Adam and the Exorcists, though the outcomes of his injuries (if he sustains any) is not yet determined.
Next up!
Zestial
Maestro
Zeezi
(possibly) Velvette
(I'm at a bit of a loss regarding Prick and Hatchet, that design/AU might not happen asdfgh)
People don't care as much about being called Lazy. But calling them Rude? That gets to more folks. It's rude that they didn't bother to put effort into whatever it was they used chatgpt for. It's rude that they thought they could advertise to you with cheap slop, thinking that would get your attention. It's rude that they didn't care enough to actually write that email.
Honestly it depends on the person and what they use it for tbh. I have a lot of people around me justifying it as a progressive advanced way of doing things, so pointing out that chatGPT actually just makes them dumber and less qualified as a person tends to be more effective - also because it's objectively true lmao
"But how am I supposed to be able to finish my PhD in 3 years without chatGPT premium?" Maybe if you can't do it without a chatbot you were never qualified for it to begin with, Karen
Alternatively. Give them the sad, defeated look like you were just told your dog has cancer, and in a calm, melancholy voice "Oh. Thats...disappointing."
You gotta emulate the tired energy of a single mom whose child has disappointed her one too many times.
OceanGate, the deep-sea exploration company that created the Titan submersible, has removed its Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and LinkedIn a
poor things, well we should definitely make this easier on them by never repeatedly mentioning their name and deeds on the "reblog things forever" website
“if you take medication for that, you’ll be taking medication all your life!!” yeah, and?? bud, i already put on my glasses every morning. it’s like. a condition of mine, not a side hobby i’m pursuing irresponsibly.
and the thrilling sequel: “taking meds for that is the easy way out!” right you are my dude, i’m a huge fan of not making things harder than they have to be
The trilogy: "taking meds changes your brain chemistry/hormones/body functions, you won't be the same person!" I would fucking hope so. I quite like not being a seriously depressed and anxious mess on the daily while suffering irregular and painful periods, what's your point?
Perill was a fleeting flower in my garden, but I am fond of her all the same.
I remember her spending countless evenings here in the Omphalos Chamber, pondering Ventari's teachings, and the good natured complaints of her mentor. “She's asking too many questions, my throat hurts from all the explaining I have to do!”
Perill had a tendency to linger and listen whenever I had audiences with her siblings; a silent observer as I settled conflicts and offered comfort. She often would stay afterwards to ask about and question me about the reasoning behind my words and decisions, and – on rare occasions – even scold me for being too soft. It was … refreshing, yet over all too soon.
She barely stayed long enough for her mentor to finish preparing her for the world before she set off to follow her calling.
Perill always had a strong sense of justice, but where others might reach for sword and shield, she armed herself with pen and paper. Studying law in old libraries and busy courtrooms; heated debate chambers and solemn gathering halls. Treading a most unusual path among my children, opting to protect the people not with her sword but her cunning mind instead. Though, her martial prowess is nothing to be ashamed of, either.
I often wonder what she's up these days, where life has guided her and if she's found what her heart longed for ...
a little something I did for a dear friend's (@sumi-sprite) OC <3
The idea of dragons in modern times is so fun because imagine a hot summer day on your vacay and go to use the hotel pool and staff is like "valued guests we regret to inform you that the pool area is out of service at the moment, we apologize for the inconvenience"
And people like "wtf why" looking out their hotel room window and there's this. This dragon just curled up in the pool chilling, literally, cooling itself down
Some of the staff are trying to gently shoo him away and the dragon does a soft little "rrrrrr" like a grumpy cat and a warning puff of smoke and they're like "fuck it i don't get paid nearly enough for this" and no ones using the pool today sorry!
i think we should be ridiculing them more for this. you don't get to try and go all "queer website" when your staff likes to go on nuking sprees targeting the trans fem users
would be remiss not to mention that the rainbow notably straight up just removed the trans flag colors from it. like they’re gone. it’s the progress flag minus the trans flag colors.
I was thinking of reblogging this again just because the original video is still amazing, but then I see the second video and lost my mind. The upgraded fan, the body glitter, the sheer fact that he got to do this with the actual singer.
This is Mark Kanemura, he’s worked closely with Gaga and been a finalist on So You Think You Can Dance twice. He didn’t “get to do this”, she hired him and he’s been in her music videos. He’s not just some nameless funny queer on the internet, say his damn name lol
