#constipation

[biology-geology-beaches-india]

The Scientific Research Notes of S. Sunkavally. Printed Part. Page 454.

Dates unclear, but certainly between 2006 - 2012.

[wanderingmind867]

Me and my dad just ate dinner. We ordered food out tonight, having nothing prepared for to be cooked in this heatwave. The humidity and the heat and the smog and everything else have been making my life absolutely miserable, and I've discussed that at length in other notes here in my notes app.

To summarize it all again: I've been unable to focus, my hands have been getting consistently clammy and sweaty, I've been sweating constantly, I've felt a rash on the back of my left leg, a sore right knee, a struggle to see certain things with my current glasses (which are something like 7-8 years old, to be fair) and oh yeah. I've had constipation. Really bad constipation, bad enough to warrant the taking of a laxative and to stress me out.

Whenever I try to go bathroom, almost nothing comes out. Nothing but blood from my hemorrhoids and the occasional small bit of poop. There's never enough to really clear me out and leave me feeling better. I wish there was something like that, but alas…no, there's been nothing. So I've just been stuck with this really bad constipation and stomach cramps. I've been probing my stomach by poking it with my fingers. And everytime I do that, I feel sore and gassy. So clearly something's blocking me up. But I'm scared it'll take me bleeding profusely just to get anything to come out of me. And that's stressing me out.

I really do want to get unblocked. But also…well, in this weather, who could even do it? It's smoggy outside from fires way up north. It's like 28 degrees outside. We've got no air conditioning in the house, and we can't open the windows for fear of smog. How am I supposed to function in an environment like this!? I mean… seriously. How am I supposed to function!? Yesterday a repairman came by to check out the ac, and he said it's frozen over. They've coming over to check on it tonight, but we haven't had air conditioning all day so we could melt the ice in our furnace pipes. And that's been responsible for me sweating so much today.

My dad goes back to work tonight. I feel like I haven't done much with him home these past few days. But to be fair…how could I be expected to find the time, what with the smog and the heat and everything!? My stomach still hurts, and I feel like I'm gonna need to go try and go bathroom in a bit. But I want to finish this first. I'm sweating and I'm uncomfortable. I'm really, really uncomfortable. But I guess I'll live.

I'm kind of hoping my dad doesn't go back to work tonight. Unless the air conditioning can get working and kicking into overdrive, I don't know if I'll want my dad working. Even if he does have to work tonight, I'm hoping he doesn't work saturday. Because saturday is when they're predicting a storm, and I don't want to deal with that alone.

On that note, me and my dad were watching a movie during dinner. I'm gonna go back to doing that now. My stomach is beginning to feel sore. Maybe I'll be lucky and I'll finally clear my bowels and get rid of all my gaseousness later. If not, hopefully the air conditioning can just go back to normal. I'm unable to go upstairs or follow my usual routine because of the heat, so I'm counting on our air conditioning getting repaired.

[wanderingmind867]

I feel weird. I woke up just a few hours ago, and I'm feeling uncomfortable. I'm really uncomfortable. I feel exhaustion seeping into my bones. I'm just not feeling great. Not at all.

I just got out of the bathroom. But in trying to go bathroom, I had blood also come out of me. This is how I know I'm constipated. Nothing really wants to come out of me. Just blood. Blood comes out, and I'm left with severe cramps in my stomach.

I just went bathroom. You know what came out? Five drops of poop, and more blood than anything else. My stomach hurts really badly, our house feels warm and tiring, I'm just tired, miserable and entirely in pain. sigh...

PS: This exhaustion is making me feel impulsive. I might post about somethings that aren't great. I want to philosophize on if it's okay for me to still think of/share anecdotes about harry potter sometimes, even though I'll never read the actual books again. But knowing me, I'd say something in a heat haze that'd make everyone hate me. So I don't know.

[wanderingmind867]

I'm so hot that I'm sweating all on my back. I had to take my shirt off. It feels warm in this house, and my stomach is sore and constipated.

I don't know how I'll sleep tonight, but I head up to bed in 30 minutes. I'll figure it out. Even if I need to sleep under my thick blankets, I have fans to help me. But gods ..I hate summer.

[wanderingmind867]

I just tried to go bathroom. Yet again, nothing really came out of me. Just blood, blood and pain. Well, pain didn't come out. Pain is what I was experiencing in there, because nothing wants to come out and I feel absolutely miserable. I think I'm just severely constipated, and it feels miserable. Absolutely miserable. I don't like it. I really, really don't like it.

On top of this, I'm suffering from pimples near my nose again. They're really sore, enough so that touching them makes me cry. Legitimately, they do make my eyes well up. It's awful.

Oh, and I'm freaking congested. I'm choking on my phlegm, and that's just great. Yeah, that's just great. I really, really don't like it. I think the smog of the weather outside is making me suffer like this. It's awful.

[wanderingmind867]

I've been paranoid about my stomach lately, and that's led me to try poking at my stomach all the damn time. And what that's seemingly led to is me having a really sore stomach. I assume the two things are connected, anyways. There's very little reason for them not to be, I think.

I still feel constipated, though. My stomach feels sore and grumbly, but nothing wants to come out. It's awful. It's really freaking awful. I hate it.

My mood is still a bit depressed. I still kind of feel like I've wasted the day. But I also know I can't have fully wasted it, so I guess I'll be fine. But yeah, my mood is all over the place. I'll be fine, nonetheless. I'll be fine.

I'm gonna try to go bathroom, I think. But there's something else I want to write in a little while. I want to write a vent about the weather. So I'll get to that in a bit.

[mess-mouse]

6:20 AM

Ohhhhh my god I almost lost it my guts are growling so so loud and cramping

[mess-mouse]

5:42 AM

Uggh I haven’t really been able to get back to sleep because I keep cramping with gas. I can’t stop letting out these rancid farts every couple minutes

I just tried to piss, but it only brought the shit closer to my hole. I’m repeatedly sucking it back in rn

I think this is going to end up great