LIVING IN SIN - CAMERLENGO CARLO VENTRESCA
nun!reader x camerlengo!carlo ventresca
word count: 1, 673
contents: Small 18+, fluff, mentions of God
You stood outside the confessional box, waiting another moment before stepping into the small room. You knelt down, looking through the screen at the priest hidden behind it.
“ Bless me father for I have sinned, it has been a month since my last confession. ”
“ Good evening my child, I am here when you are ready. ”
You took another breath, trying to collect the courage before beginning.
“ I have given into temptation, I fought against it, but I was weak father, please forgive me. ”
“ We all have our weaknesses, but what is important is that you fight against it. Go and say five Hail Mary’s God will forgive you, my child. ”
You quietly thanked the older priest before you left the small room. You walked down the church aisle, bowing to the crucifix that hung proud in the center of the altar before entering a long wooden pew. You sat down on the wooden bench folding your hands reverently on your lap. Your head dropped, your eyes shutting before you began to quietly pray. You went through all your prayers before rising, once more you bowed as you left the aisle before exiting the church.
You padded down the tall marble steps, watching carefully not to bump into any of the men of clergy that passed. As you walked one man in particular caught your eye, Carlo, he was the closest man to the pope, his own personal aide. You had spoken to him a few times, in fact you had quite a close relationship.
Carlo’s eye caught onto, you were much different than the other sisters. You weren’t yet a nun officially, your vows having not been taken. You didn’t wear black, or a habit, instead you wore a white gown paired with a lace veil to cover your hair, you stood out like a flower in an empty field.
“ Sister, you are coming from the church? ”
“ Yes, I just took confession, and you know I am not a sister yet. ”
“ You will be soon enough. ”
“ But not yet. ”
“ Soon though. ”
You rolled your eyes at his persistence, continuing your path back to the nearby convent. Carlo continued following your lead, even though the Vatican where he belonged was the opposite way.
“ And why may I ask, are you following me? ”
“ Heaven forbid I wish to make sure you make it home alright. ”
A small smile slipped across your lips as you walked beside him. You remained together in a peaceful silence, simply taking comfort in one another's company. Your heels clicked against the stones, as did Carlo’s loafers.
After some time had passed you finally reached the convent, the grand building standing tall beside you.
“ Thank you for walking me. ”
“ It was my pleasure, goodnight Sister. ”
“ I told you, I am not a sister yet, I am a postulant. ”
A laugh escaped Carlo, a smile slipping across his lips from your correction.
His eyes followed you as you entered the convent leaving him a small wave and goodbye.
-
The next morning you left the convent, walking down the stone streets of Rome. Your veil caught in the breeze letting it flow as you walked. You held a few books in your arms that one of the sisters had requested you bring to Carlo.
You found him in one of the Vatican’s private chapels, lost in prayer. You quite approached, reaching out to touch his shoulder. Carlo jumped at your sudden touch, his eyes opening as his head turned to face you.
“ Sorry, sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. I was asked to deliver these to you directly. ”
“ It’s quite alright, I just wasn’t aware you were here. ”
Carlo now stood in front of you, his hands reaching out to take the books from your arms. He opened a few of the covers, looking through the material.
“ Thank you for bringing this to me. ”
“ Of course, is that all that is needed of me? ”
“ Yes, I suppose, but you’re more than welcome to join me while I go over this. ”
“ Yes, I would like that. ”
Carlo led you down the winding halls of the Vatican, and you simply followed after him. He reached out, opening the door to his office for you, allowing you to enter before him. You entered the room, sitting down in a chair on the opposite side of his desk.
“ How are you to see the text from over there? Come around, sit beside me. ”
“ But there is no seat on that side? ”
“ You are welcome to sit on my knee, would that be alright. ”
You gave a weak nod, rounding the desk before coming to sit down on his thigh. Carlo opened the books, spreading them out across the top of the desk, revealing all the material. You sat together in silence, your eyes roaming the words on the page. All the books were in Latin, which fortunately you both understood.
Carlo went through the material, writing down notes in a separate book. He went through all of the material in a matter of hours, the sun just beginning to set when he finished. He reached out, shutting the books, setting them aside in a neat stack.
“ It’s quite late, I’m not sure you should walk back to the convent. ”
“ It’s only a quarter to nine, it’s only just getting dark. ”
“ I would feel better if you stayed at the Vatican, just for this evening. ”
A sigh escaped your lips, turning to face him.
“ If it will calm your worries, I will stay. ”
Carlo helped you off his lap, guiding you from his office. He snuck you down the Vatican halls, successfully getting you to his private chambers.
His bedroom was fit for a king, a large four poster bed dressed with red silk sheets, there was a velvet sofa pressed against the wall just below a window. Opposite to his bed there was a large wooden wardrobe with a matching desk. It was like nothing you had ever seen before.
“ Your bed reminds me of a princess’. ”
A smile slipped across Carlo’s lips, his hands moving to pull off his clerical collar. He set the white band aside on his desk beginning to unbutton his black dress shirt. You stood awkwardly behind him, unsure of where to sit or what to do.
Your eyes dropped, following Carlo’s shirt as it fell to the floor. He continued to undress, seeming as if he had forgotten you were even there. His hands moved to pull loose the buckle on his belt. His pants fell to his ankles before he stepped out of them. He now stood in only a grey undershirt, his boxers hanging low on his hips before he turned around.
“ I apologize, have I made you uncomfortable? ”
“ No, no, I just was lost in a moment of thought. ”
“ You are welcome to make yourself comfortable, I do not mind. ”
You only responded with a small nod, your hands reaching up to pull loose your veil. You removed the pins from your hair, setting aside the lacey cloth. You wore a much simpler gown than the other nun’s, having not yet taken your vows you weren’t held to as high standards, so it didn’t take you long to remove the garment.
You slid out of your dress, letting the white fabric fall to your feet. You now stood in only a silk chemise, the garment falling just past your mid thigh, Carlo couldn’t help but stare.
“ Will I sleep on the sofa? ”
“ No, of course not, you will share my bed. ”
You responded with a nod, rounding the bed before crawling under the blankets. You knew men and women of the church were forbidden to give into temptation, but Carlo was a high member of the clergy, surely he knew best.
You laid together under the blankets, your bodies near, but not touching. Your eyes were both trained on the covering that lay over his bed, neither of you speaking.
Eventually sleep took you, allowing you to drift off, letting your thoughts subside.
-
Throughout the night your bodies moved, searching for each other's warmth. Your arms slipped around his neck, your face hiding against his neck, your legs entangled together under the blankets. Carlo’s arms were wrapped around your waist, holding you tightly against him, his face hidden in your hair, inhaling the sweet scent of your shampoo.
The moon stood high in the midnight sky but yet you began to stir, shifting and tossing against Carlo’s front. Your eyes cracked open, finding yourself entangled with Carlo, but you didn’t break apart. Your eyes found his closed ones, silently wishing he would wake. As if God himself had heard your prayers his eyes cracked open.
Even as Carlo came to he didn’t pull himself from your embrace. You both simply laid there in one another’s arms, keeping each other near. Eventually you broke the peaceful silence.
“ We are sinning. ”
“ We can ask for forgiveness in the morning. ”
Carlo’s arms tightened around you, pulling you nearer to him. His head dipped down, his lips finding your neck. Soft sounds escaped past your lips as his lips moved about your smooth skin. You knew in your heart this was forbidden, but yet it still called to you. Carlo’s kisses trailed up your neck, tracing the soft edge of your jawline before finding your lips. His fingers dug into your hips pulling you closer.
Your fingers slid up the nape of his neck, pulling on his locs of chestnut hair. Sounds you did not know you could make slipped from your lips, falling into Carlo’s mouth. The desire you shared together was primal, both of you to lost in one another to care of any consequence.
That night you laid together in a way no priest should lay with a nun, but deep down you did not feel sorry, you did not even feel regret for it, but yet the next morning you sat in a confessional, confessing your deepest sins to a priest whom you did not even know.
