#did fusion

[evergreensys]

telling singlet friends about your DID who didn't know about it when you met is so weird to explain. like.

"right, so, you know me as Cameron. I went by that name for years, and everyone in the system goes by Cameron, but technically, I'm not Cameron at all and Cameron doesn't actually exist. Cameron was the previous host, who later changed his name to Juno. also I'm Phoenix, a fusion of the previous host and someone else, so I'm partly Cameron, but not really".

how the fuck do you phrase that.

[freeyourparts]

hey ummm.. can I have some #awesome advice/hear yalls experience in smth maybb...

ive been feeling really weird lately, especially right now, and im worried it might be a fusion? but idk what that feels like? so I wanted to ask what it normally feels like/what the experience of a fusion is like.

we've had a few different splits, but we've only had 1 fusion we know about, over 5 years ago by now.

thankss :s

-a mildly concerned and worried 🥩‼️

UHHH... so. we,, haven't had any fusions as far as we know...?? so i don't really know how to help and i don't want to say anything because i don't want to misinform you.

however we found these from the r/DID subreddit, if it helps.

IF ANYONE IN NOTES HAS EXPERIENCE, PLS ADD ON!

[reimeichan]

I think it's easy for me to talk about fusion and integration as a whole, because that's what feels most natural for me. But I've started thinking about what it feels like as a specific part of me- and I think that's a useful perspective to have, especially when it comes to trying to share and express how that feels for others who haven't experienced it for themselves, for those who want to but aren't there yet, and for those who never will but are still curious.

For me, it feels like I was missing a part of me that I didn't even realize was missing until I fused. I didn't realize just how much of my own... like, ability to feel emotions and experience life? was missing, and each time I fused it felt like my awareness of myself and my surroundings widened and became clearer. I feel like with each fusion, my emotions became deeper and more layered, my understanding of the world more nuanced, and my memories more detailed. If I were to use metaphors, it feels similar to putting on glasses for the first time, or adjusting a camera's focus. But it also feels like adding color to a drawing. Or... you know those TV shows or movies where you're given one perspective of an event, and then as the story unfolds you see that same event from different perspectives and you realize you actually didn't have the whole picture beforehand? It feels kind of like that, but applied to my entire life and my entire understanding of what it means to live and exist in this world.

Speaking of perspectives, it feels like I can now move between these different perspectives easily, or even see things from multiple perspectives at the same time. I have more context for things that I otherwise would have never questioned before.

And while I'm aware of all of this happening to me specifically as a part... I'm also aware of the other parts of me experiencing the same thing. We're all going through this together, after all, and adjusting to this to be our new normal. It's kinda funky to be able to feel and see things from each of our points of view at the same time, and it was definitely quite overwhelming at first. But it's better now, and I'm less scared of having access to all of these memories and emotions and stuff that had been kept away from me. I'm even starting to accept what it means to be happy and to deeply, truly love people. That's a huge step for me, and I'm excited to see what else fusion and integration has in store for me.

[greens-spilled-tea]

I will admit that the Tumblr CDD communities have been pretty good to me in regards to reaching final fusion. I don't remember seeing many posts from people about how fusion is killing alters or how final fusion is like conversion therapy to turn multiples into singlets or whatever. Either I've somehow avoided most of the stigma surrounding fusion in recent years or Tumblr really is just more mature/better informed about it than some other spaces.

So anyways if you have any fusion and integration hot takes and don't mind me commenting on them, feel free to send them my way. Or if you've got questions on fusion and stuff, I also love answering those questions.

[horrorcrew-diary]

I'm fairly sure a fusion of some sort has happened.

I (Phil) feel different, and I'm beginning to remember things from highschool. Specifically, Karkat's time helping us through it. I remember sophomore year, which is well known throughout the system as one of the worst years of our life, as well as when we figured out we were a system at all.

I'm not sad, as I barely knew her, and since her memories and mannerisms are still here through me, it's barely like she's gone at all.

I've had a feeling that some sort of fusion was gonna happen soon, as I had started heavily thinking about it for no reason out of the blue. If anything, I was expecting me and Pastra to fuse, but it has its own subsystem now, so that's unlikely to happen any time soon.

Our outerworld partner is taking this surprisingly well, too. I was expecting him to be upset because Karkat was one of his partners, but really now I'm like, girlfriend^2, because I remember Karkat's time with him, too.

I can see why it happened, as from what I've heard about her, we're fairly similar. We both are very girly in our own right and have similar favorite foods and even mannerisms.

I'm also not upset because this is a sign of healing. We've been on vacation, which has really done wonders for our mental health (albeit coming with the added side effect of having weird system shit going on).

[adamdeez]

I’ve only seen one other person talk about almost fusing and then something else extremely traumatic happening so you split mid ALMOST complete fusion. Anyone else experience that? I know DissociaDID experienced it recently. I wish I saw more examples of it because they didn’t even know how to describe it.

[haunted-children-didsys]

rant

so many of us just fussed and that made us tired af but hey, at least I have a in system boyfriend now🤷🏼‍♀️

~luna𖤐

[ghosthouse-sys]

Our friend knows we're a system nd they know we are a fusion and they know our source and they still are making us watch a deep dive of the source content. They know. My friend knows. They know itl triggerus it might make us resplit or it might make the original fictiv spltt agsin amnd thyreopenly making fun of it and they won't let me comment on it they yell and scream at me to shut and imhaving a rlly bad time we wannt to crhy