#husband 1

[dix0nspretty]

Something something having a bad day and finally getting home to relax with a comfort food and a drink under your favorite blanket only to spill it all over you. Staining your shirt and soaking the blanket.

Breaking down in tears because why can’t anything go right?

Simon coming home to find his love bawling her eyes out, teary and borderline wailing.

Thinking she’s hurt or someone’s done something to her until you babble to him about work and stress and “stupid fucking motor skills, I can’t even feed myself-“

Simon taking it upon himself to fix everything. Making up a warm bath full of bubbles, candles lighting the bathroom so you don’t have to put up with fluorescent lights.

Scooping you up into his arms like you weigh nothing- it’s laughable when you mutter something about being too heavy. As if.

“Hush,” he murmurs and sets you atop the sink, taking your wet clothes off with a gentleness unlike the large Lieutenant.

He gets you situated in the bath, leaving to return several minutes later with a brand new drink and food for you.

By then you’re embarrassed over the breakdown, peeking at him from your hiding spot behind the bubbles.

He pays it no mind. You’re shy, so what? It won’t stop him taking care of you.

“You’re alright love,” he says in a loving tone that’s reserved for you. Only for you. He’ll sit with you in the silence of the room, not bothering to make you speak or ask you questions. You’re overwhelmed, that much is clear, and you deserve some peace and quiet.

So Simon sits beside the tub with you, feeding you small bites as the soothing water and aromas calm you down. He treats you like a princess, washing your skin and your hair for you. Blatantly ignoring whenever you protest that “I can do that, Si, you don’t have to-”

You’re his baby, his world, and he’ll treat you like so.

He dresses you in his clothes so you’ll feel warm and comforted in his big hoodie and boxers. Staking his claim on you.

He tucks you into bed despite your whines of how early it is, wraps his mountain of a body around yours to keep you grounded and feeling safe. Turns on that show you’ve seen a million times that he bitches and moans about but watches anyways.

And he watches you fall asleep, whispering soft declarations of love and adoration into your dried hair. Never letting you think for a second that you aren’t absolutely cherished.

[dukeoftheblackstar]

The thought of being Jango Fett's client and more. He'd deny you sex even if you were at the level of casual fucking or being intimate unless you pay up.

I LOVE THIS MAN SO MUCH.

"Sitting on my face does not settle your tab. Also, you do not have a tab."

"You know what to do" as he waits for you to transfer payment withholding himself from giving you even the slightest peak of that glorious Fett gene distributor.

Jango getting very turned on watching you tap away on your device as you add another digit to the original amount agreed.

Jango gives you a receipt with an itemized breakdown of added cost (example, another G for doing that position you like that is not very good for his middle-aged back, additional costs between armor on and armor off + helmet on and helmet off)

Jango has insurance clause. if you damage his armor during sex, you pay double.

No, you do not get to fire the missile — ever.

The rangefinder is not a toy.

You get a discount if you wear the helmet while getting rawdogged.

Emphasis on being a CLIENT.

[hxuse-xf-black]

Harry, rolling out of Hagrid's arms in the Battle of Hogwarts:

Andromeda, upon seeing Remus and Sirius together:

Narcissa about herself:

Bellatrix, reading baby Draco a bedtime story:

Beth, counting the money she got after Husband #1 mysteriously died:

Regulus:

[grits-gal-raised-in-the-south]

Meghan convinced Harry to over share his psychological and emotional problems with the world. She also convinced a weak minded Harry to bury himself under a mountain litigation.

If I didn't know better, I'd think Meghan's ultimate goal is to LEGALLY dispose of her 3rd "husband¹" by booting him out of The United States of America.

¹Trevor is the 1st husband & Cory is the 2nd.

[djesusgetnaked]

I ship you with Ben Mendelsohn because it just makes sense. Tall, attractive, beautiful in every way. Funny and sensitive but a massive goofball. It just works

iuygtfgy My first husband. Okay you managed to kill me with only one answer.But I’m so down for it !

We’d be very chaotic together, doing random stupid things which make sense only in our minds, be funny and very sexy ofc.

Where do I sign up for this ?

[herewegoagainniall]

An actual text I just sent to @my-drug-is-styles

[serket-swapped]

I’m usually not one for digital art but I felt like drawing my husband after several hours of Stardew tonight <3 

[hxuse-xf-black]

Beth, when the aurors accuse her of killing her husbands: This is the worst kind of discrimination! The kind against me!