#source: staged

[kazashiniwielder]

Shinji: Is there a word for jealously mixed with pride?

Kensei, glancing at Shuhei and Mashiro: parenthood

[incorrectswarlaquotes]

Lisa is a bit bored without Carla

Carla FaceTiming Lisa: Hello! Are you okay?

Lisa: Give me a minute. *Stares out of the window*

Carla: What are you looking at?

Lisa: I worry I'm in a Hitchcock film.

Carla: What do you mean?

Lisa: The birds are coming back to Weatherfield!

Carla: ..... Thats ... nice

Lisa: The large blue finch is the leader it seems.

Carla: ....

Carla: Are sure you're okay?

Lisa: Of course I’m absolu-

Lisa: *Runs over to the window* I SEE YOU!!! YOU LITTLE FEATHERED SHIT!!!

Carla: ....

[hoarder-of-dragons]

Aziraphale: Crowley promise me you will be nice to him. He does not have his memories. Crowley: I'm going to be really calm and nice, trust me angel Jim Gabriel appears Crowley : SO THAT'S THERE YOU HAVE BEEN HIDING YOU FUCKING CUNT

[nympheallotus]

Sirius: Remus says we’re like an old married couple

James: … well you are

Sirius: … no … not me and Remus, me and you!

Regulus: who’s the big spoon?

James and Sirius: ME

[teenwolfpackincorrectcaptions]

Stiles: When I was a kid, my dad, if we lied, made us stand in the corner for half an hour. Cora: Did it stop you lying? Stiles: For half an hour.

[pizzaboat]

Eda: Camila's not a scary person

Raine: Camila has never asked for help opening a jar before.

[spiltinksky]

Junhui: What’re you doing?

Seokmin, eating cake and scrolling on his phone: Yoga.

Junhui: You found some good options?

Seokmin: Loads. I’ve narrowed it doing to five.

Junhui: Oh, well done. You must be exhausted.

Seokmin: Yes, that’s why I’m having cake.

[upside-down-peonies]

The Doctor: Wha-? Who would try to kill me?!

River Song: Well, the list is potentially endless.