Is This Really YOUR Anxiety?
So, you're anxious again. Yea, don't fret, it's normal. We all have our emotional triggers, life issues and breaking points. But does your stress fit into one of those boxes? No? Hmmm. Then, what is it? If you're doing okay, what's left to be anxious about? Maybe, just maybe, it's not you! Maybe, you fell into a bit of a trap that now has you ensnared. If so, the anxiety you're feeling may not really be yours. Sounds impossible, right? Yet, in fact, we do this all the time. Well, here's what I think is happening and here's how to snap out of it.
I suggest that, in these times, you've been unknowingly sucked into someone else's anxiety. Maybe it's your colleague, a friend, your partner, other family members or even a stranger who have made a lasting impact on you. Regardless of who it is or the circumstance, the scenario is likely the same. Someone in your life is having a major issue, real or just perceived. They caught your attention and your caregiver instincts kicked in. You gave them your attention, you listened intently, you saw their problem through their eyes, and you offered them your caring support. Makes sense. This is normal, right? We all have a drive to help others in times of need. But there's a right way and there's a really wrong way to proceed.
First, the wrong way. This is where you hone into their mindset in the hopes to understand them. The problem here is that you run the risk of "purchasing" their problems in the process. And once this happens, you become part of their anxiety-fueled journey. They'll expect you to understand their thinking. They'll expect your unconditional support. And they'll expect your most precious resources, your emotions and time. Well, at that moment, you have to say "No" and set proper boundaries. The right way to continue is to recognize that you've encountered a problem. If you really want to support them, provide them with professional resources. Don't take on this unwinnable battle. And not to fear, it doesn't mean you're heartless or a bad person. Just remember that, when other peoples' problems start affecting your wellbeing, it's time to pull back and let the experts do their job.












