May I please request a sans aus raccoon!reader please? *(Idk seems kind of funny for the sanses to have a little thief as their partner if you think about it)
OMGG this is such a goated idea TYSM FOR THE REQUESTT (≧▽≦), well this one is rather unique headcannon so I hope u like it my jellies!!
Sanses Headcannons: What it’s like with a Raccoon?!
By: Yami
♡Scenario: Their S/O is a Raccoon
Sans AUs x Raccoon! Reader
Classic (Sans) 🍦
•he loves how low-maintenance you are about some things.
•the “raccoon instincts” trip him up sometimes
•he thinks your whiskers are adorable.
•sometimes he has to stop you from raiding the trash at 2 AM.
•LOVESS petting your tail, but is still cautious of your boundaries.
•You’ll be sitting on the couch, and he’ll hand you a bag of chips. Instead of opening it, you wander over to the kitchen sink, dunk a chip in water, and then eat it. “Uh, baby? You know those are already clean, right?” He just chuckles and pulls you onto his lap, letting you use his oversized hoodie to wipe your wet hands.
Underswap (Blueberry) 🫐
•Blueberry takes your diet very seriously.
•He looked up what raccoons eat, and still decided that meant you needed a 5-star meal of fruits, nuts, and cooked proteins.
•He gets incredibly excited when you take a piece of fruit and instinctively wash it in the little bowl of water he sets out for you.
• Lovess brushing your big, fluffy striped tail.
•Would make obstacle courses filled with shiny things just for you.
•“MWEH HEH HEH, MAIDEN! I HAVE CONSTRUCTED A NEW FORAGING COURSE FOR YOU!” He has literally hidden shiny quarters and colorful buttons all over the living room. You scramble around, snatching them up and stuffing them into your pockets while your tail swishes excitedly. Blue clasps his hands together, his eye sockets turning into literal stars. “YOU ARE SO EFFICIENT! JUST MAKE SURE YOU WASH YOUR HANDS BEFORE DINNER! I MADE TACOS!”
Underfell (Red) 🍫
•Red pretends he hates your raccoon tendencies.
•is actually a massive sucker for you.
•enjoys how fluffy you are, just like his jacket.enjoys how fluffy you are, just like his jacket.
•likes making you sit on his lap while you nap.
•‘cause of your hybrid nature, you have a habit of hoarding shiny things—including his gold tooth (you literally tried to pry it out of his mouth while he was sleeping. “Ya can’t just take a guy’s tooth, sweetheart!” He scolds you, blushing furiously while you pout at him. He ends up buying you a pack of shiny brass rings and foil wrappers just to keep your paws busy so you’ll cuddle with him.
Swapfell (Blackberry) 🍇
•He tries to maintain an aura of absolute authority,
•It completely falls apart when you view his expensive stuff as the ultimate shiny prize.
•Pretends he hates it, but actually loves when you would show him shiny things you find. (Tsundere ahh 😭)
•Like Blue, he likes to carefully plan what you eat.
•He will be giving a stern lecture, only to look down and find you actively trying to steal the golden ring on his finger. He sighs, pinches the bridge of his nasal bone, and picks you up by the scruff “UNHAND MY RING, YOU GREMLIN. IF YOU WANT SOMETHING SHINY, YOU WILL BEHAVE.” He immediately buys you a shiny silver bracelet to match with him later.
Ink 🎨
•Ink thinks you are the most fascinating person in the multiverse.
•He forgets things constantly, but he never forgets to leave out “treasures” for you.
•Paints you in bright, neon colors to which his room is full of paintings of you.
•Sometimes he forgets you have raccoon instincts and gets startled when you grab his giant paintbrush and try to drag it into a dark corner.
•Loves to draw glowing stars for you to play with.
•You’re playing with a glowing star ink painted for you, softly snugged up above your hanging nest as he stares up at you in awe. “Don’t move! The lighting is perfect!” Ink beams, his eyes shifting into a yellow star and a pink circle. You tilt your head, your face looking down at him curiously. “You look perfect my love, just hold still!” You smile as you let him do his thing.
Error 🧶
•Error usually hates being touched, but you’re an exception thanks to how meticulous you are about cleanliness
•you would always try to steal his strings when he isn’t looking.
•secretly loves it when you would stare at the marks on his face in fascination.
•sometimes get annoyed when his yarn isn’t as fluffy as you.
•He’ll be knitting, and you’ll stealthily grab a glowing blue string and bolt. “g-gEt bAcK hErE, YoU dAmN—!” He crashes for a second, but his glitches soften when he finds you curled up in a pile of his stolen blue strings, fast asleep.
X-tale (Cross) ❌
•Cross is incredibly soft with you.
•He thinks the fort you would always make with pillows and blankets is the coziest place.
•Loves to just snuggle with you after a long day.
•He loves when you curl up against his chest, your fluffy tail wrapped around his waist.
•He does, however, have to constantly check his pockets because you will steal his chocolate wrappers (and sometimes the chocolate itself) if he isn’t looking.
•You are currently hiding inside his giant furry cloak, only your masked face and fluffy ears poking out from the collar. “Dude, Chara is laughing at me,” Cross mutters, his violet eye lights softened as he looks down at you. You let out a soft whine and dig deeper into his fluff, your striped tail wrapping around his arm. Cross sighs, a massive purple blush spreading across his face as he wraps his arms around you, securing you against his chest. “Okay, fine, you can stay in there. But you’re not allowed to steal my chocolate wrappers anymore.”
Dream 💫
•Dream is like a walking sun beam, and your raccoon instincts are naturally drawn to his bright, positive aura
•He would smile brightly whenever you bring him shiny objects.
•Like Blue, he loves brushing your fur.
•You think Dream’s crown is the shiniest thing to ever exist.
•He would try to make you a matching crown so you don’t steal his.
•You spend half your time trying to gently swipe the crown off his head. Dream just giggles, tilting his head down to make it easier for you. “Do you like it, project? You can hold it, just please don’t wash it in the sink!”
Nightmare 🌑
•Nightmare claims he keeps you around because you’re a “chaotic little menace,” which appeals to his dark nature.
•In reality, bro is down bad.
•You like to wrap up his slimy tendrils and just snuggle with him.
•He pretends to be annoyed, but his tendrils will gently secure you so you don’t fall.
•He also uses his shadows to steal high-end jewelry from jewelry stores just to watch your eyes light up.
•You are currently sitting on his throne, aggressively playing on a shiny silver pen you stole from his desk. “Unhand it this instant,” Nightmare commands, his single cyan eye narrowing. You pout, puffing up your tail until it’s twice its normal size, holding the pen tighter. Nightmare pinches the bridge of his nasal bone. One of his dark tendrils snakes forward, but instead of snatching the pen, it gently tickles your side. You squeak, dropping the pen, and the tendril immediately scoops you up, bringing you directly into his lap. “Mine,” he mutters, wrapping you in his dark aura.
Dusttale (Dust) 🌪
•Dust’s house is a bit chaotic, so you fit right in.
•he loves your chaotic energy.
•he finds it hilarious when Phantom Papyrus tries to talk to you, and you just stare aggressively at the empty air because you can sense the weird magic.
•with the help of Dust, you would sometimes try to talk to his Papyrus.
•would get shy whenever you would gift him shiny objects you find.
•You two are currently sitting in the ruins of Snowdin. You’re digging through a pile of snow, looking for lost gold coins, while Dust watches, his phantom brother floating nearby.
“he says you look stupid digging in the dirt,” Dust murmurs, his mismatched eye lights gleaming. Suddenly, you pull out a perfectly preserved, shiny glass marble. Your ears perk up and you hold it up to him like a prize. Dust blinks, a faint purple blush dusting his cheekbones. He takes it, turning it over in his skeletal hands. “Huh. not bad, bandit. tell ya what, let’s go find some more.”
Killer 🔪
•Killer treats you like a partner-in-crime.
•he loves your stealth, bro will literally use you to prank the others.
•“hey babe, go steal Nightmare’s favorite pen. I’ll give you a whole bag of shiny marbles.” You take the deal every time.
•you do the distractions while he does the chaos
•you two are a chaotic duo that the rest of the castle fears.
•You two just got back from a prank war with Horror, and you managed to steal Horror’s favorite shiny meat cleaver “pfft! look at you! you’re a literal criminal!” Killer laughs with his void-like eyes as he watches you proudly guard the cleaver under the couch. You grin excitedly, your tail thumping. Killer slides under the couch with you, pulling you against his chest. “we gotta hide out here till he cools down. but hey, good job on the loot, babe. you’ve got great taste in weapons.”
Horrortale (Axe) 🍴
•Axe completely understands the “scavenger” mindset.
•he loves that you aren’t picky about food, but he is fiercely protective of making sure you get the “good” stuff. •cooks massive meals for you, and he finds it absolutely endearing when you take your food to the sink to wash it.
•he loves petting your ears his massive hand.
•If you ever raid the trash because of your instincts, he gets sad thinking he didn’t feed you enough, so you have to reassure him with lots of tail-wags and cuddles.
•“good…clean food…” Axe rumbles, his deep voice vibrating through his chest as you happily wash the food he made for you. You finish washing it and take a happy bite, your ears twitching. Axe reaches out with a massive, scarred hand, gently stroking your ears. A rare, genuine smile tugs at his jagged jaw. “eat up, my love. i’ll get ya somethin’ shiny later if ya finish it all.”
Epictale (Epic) 😎
•Epic is the ultimate enabler to your shenanigans
•you want to raid the fridge at 3 AM? bro right there with you, wearing matching sunglasses.
•he loves your raccoon ears and will constantly scratch behind them
•just like Killer, both of you are an absolute menace together.
•likes making you shiny D.I.Y with foil and other things you can find at home.
•You two are currently sitting on the floor of his lab, surrounded by empty chip bags, wearing matching sunglasses. “bruh, look at this,” Epic says, holding up a completely empty, shiny aluminum foil ball he rolled up. Your eyes lock onto it, ears twitching “You want the forbidden orb, bruh?” You leap at him, and Epic laughs hysterically, letting you tackle him to the floor. He wraps his arms around you, snuggling his head in your tail as he enjoys this moment.
Fresh 🌈
•Fresh thinks your whole aesthetic is “totally radical, brah.”
•he doesn’t mind your hoarding instinct at all
•he gives you his brightest, most neon keychains and shiny 90s slap-bracelets.
•you love how bright he is (literally).
•he would give you a bunch of his stuff just so you two can match.
•Right now, you are literally clinging to him like a koala, staring intensely at the bright, reflective “YOLO” text on his glasses. “whoa there, radical bae! my eyes are up here, dawg!” Fresh says, his tone totally casual despite you trying to pry the sunglasses off his face with your tiny hands. You let out a frustrated sigh as Fresh chuckles, pulling a pair of brightly colored, neon-pink shutter shades from his fanny pack and slipping them onto your face. “there ya go, baby! now you’re matching the vibe!”
