salt and ice (m)
pairing: haechan x reader
genre: angst, smut, fluff, f2l (kinda)
warning: unprotected sex, sixty-nining, dirty talk, oral, fingering, semi-public fingering, orgasm denial, overstimulation
wc: 14.6k
summary: lee donghyuck was your best friend, but you hated him. well, at least you think you do. you hate everything that he is, and everything he had become. despite this, you find your friendship actually quite simple with him, never crossing the line of being too complicated. as time starts to grow, and as donghyuck starts to realize he wants to become closer to you, things start to change. and soon enough, you’re stuck on the ‘complicated’ line with him. your dynamic soon becomes like salt and ice.
your blood was running. you could feel your head turning hot and your hands becoming restless. you huff out a breath of air, your eyes scanning across the door in front of you. what the hell were you doing here? this was the last place you should have been at this hour. but you were here anyway, your body moving against you and knocking against the door with haste.
you hear a loud curse from the other side of door before it swings open to a very displeased donghyuck. his hair was sticking in different directions, his eyes narrowing in your direction, shirt barely over his head and pants hanging lowly on his hips. when he realizes it’s you who disturbed him at such an ungodly hour, his eyebrow raises and he has a smirk tracing his pretty features.
“y/n? nice seeing you here,” he leans against the frame, arms crossed. and you snort at the action, your eyes rolling.
quite frankly, you hated him. you hated donghyuck and everything that he was. but he was your friend, believe it or not. lee donghyuck was your childhood friend, and everyone knew that. no one made sense of it, and to be honest, neither did you. you weren’t a ‘good girl’, but you did care about your future just a bit. donghyuck, however, could care less. deciding that fucking around and causing trouble was his way to go. and you hated him. you hated your friend since childhood. but you were still his friend.
“never mind,” your voice was monotone, and he looks at you with furrowed eyebrows, “i see you’re busy.”
he rolls his own eyes at that, “not even. i was sleeping, idiot. you think i have a girl over at this fucking hour? fuck that.”
you nod your head, a smile creeping up on you. that’s right. donghyuck hated having girls over at night, he knew that was when you normally decided it was time to go see him. sometimes it hurt you for how thoughtful he could be.
“i see,” you shift on your feet, almost feeling awkward. you didn’t really know why you were there, in all honesty. and he seemed to know that, because next thing you know, you’re being dragged into his apartment. you let out a little noise of surprise, and he chuckles.
he shuts his door, “what’s wrong?” he questions, hand still in yours as he takes you with him to his room. you didn’t exactly realize just how tired you were until you made it into the confines of his surprisingly clean room. he was tidy, beyond most belief.
you sigh, letting your hand fall loose from his as you climb into his king size bed, “tired.”
he’s quick to join you, raising an eyebrow at you, “i know that’s not all, y/n.” and you hated how much he knew you. you hated how close he clung to you, knowing you like how he felt when he held you.
your body falls limp into his grip, and he tugs you closer, “i got broken up with again.”
at this, he tenses and his mind starts flooding, his stare turning intense the longer he looks at you. he could hear his heart in his head, blood starting to rush there. he almost felt light headed. he swallows, nerves starting to surface. in some ways, donghyuck loved you. he loved how driven you were, how you were respectful of others, and secretly loving. but he knew times a million that he wasn’t your type. you always went after the high scholar boys, even as kids. so, for the rest of his life, he will lay awake and imagine that you are his. he wanted you happy, and if it wasn’t with him? he had no choice but to accept his fate.
he eases as he holds you, “men suck.”
you chuckle at his statement, somehow finding his presence comforting. “they do.” but, maybe, he doesn’t. maybe donghyuck isn’t the person everyone else sees. you know he isn’t. he places a façade up, and you would be lying if you said it didn’t bother you. you wished he would just let his guard down. maybe then you would stop holding such a grudge against him.
“can we sleep?” hyuck yawns as he snuggles into you, breathing in your scent that makes you somehow at ease. “it’s late.”
you look over at him, and notice how his eyes were barely open at this point. he sluggishly smiles at you, making you want to smile back. “yeah, of course.” you did wake him up pretty late, and you felt quite sorry for him. he hums a soft ‘goodnight’ and easily falls asleep. but his hold on you burns your skin, and you feel like you’re going against your morals by simply laying in bed with him. but he was your friend. so, why did your heart pick up when you looked at the way his eyelashes rested beautiful upon his cheeks? donghyuck was in no way your type. he wasn’t someone you could see yourself with in the long run. you were even surprised you were still friends with him after all this time, especially since you had such a bitter feeling towards him. but maybe that’s why you felt so bitter towards him. he became apart of your life so easily, for so long. and it scared you. lee donghyuck was all that you truly knew.
you stare at him one last time, before placing a soft kiss on his forehead, “goodnight, donghyuck.”
maybe you didn’t hate him as much as you thought.
“hey there, pretty girl,” you hear a voice behind you. your eyes come in contact with honey brown ones, making warmth spread through your body. you weren’t sure if it was in annoyance or fondness. but there was no denying the way hyuck’s small smile made you stare at him for just a second longer.
“hey,” you’re short in your response, turning to pay attention to the book you hold. you can practically feel his pout burning holes into the back of your head. donghyuck constantly demanded attention, needing some type of affection or else he’d probably combust.
he plops in the seat next to you, “what’s up?” he rests his head in his hand, sipping the drink he had in the other. your eyes travel down to his lips, watching as he sips the drink. you unknowingly lick your own, but it doesn’t seem to go unnoticed by him because next thing you know, he’s smiling at you like he won the lottery. “wanna kiss?”
you scoff, rolling your eyes as you turn back to the book once again, “in your dreams.”
“always in my dreams,” he sighs dramatically, making you side eye him. he was still smiling, the small moment obviously boosting his already large ego. donghyuck can’t help himself from admiring you for a few seconds. you had your lips slightly pursed, indicating you were in deep thought. or you were annoyed, but either way he found it endearing. your eyes were scanning over the pages like you belonged there right in that moment. he admires you like you’re his, like he’s allowed to and this is a normal occurrence. and maybe you can feel his gaze, and maybe you ignore it. because maybe you liked his eyes on you.
“is there something you needed?” you ask him, bringing him out of the trance he was once in.
he eyes you for a minute before finally responding, “no, not really. i just wanted to be around you, i guess.” he shrugs his shoulders as he takes another sip of his drink, the condensation starting to drip onto the table.
you nod, “okay.”
hyuck never understood you. he could never predict what you were thinking and it frustrated him, in a way. you were quite cold towards him, never once opening your heart to him. you barely even opened your mind to him. you were a mystery. maybe that’s why he stayed for so long. and hyuck never asked questions, and maybe that’s why you stayed for so long too. your friendship with hyuck was simple, you assumed. but there was a fine line between being simple and complicated, and you were sure you were right on the edge of it. donghyuck knew you practically dreaded being around him, and he always wondered why you never rejected him or shoved him out of your life.
“how are you?” the words seemed to come out of his mouth before he could think. it wasn’t like hyuck to ask random questions without a reason. this makes you raise an eyebrow in his direction, eyes finally off the book completely.
“fine, you?” it felt almost awkward to talk to him like this. you definitely weren’t used to it. most of the time, conversations with him were short and came naturally. but it seemed as if he was forcing it this time.
“fine..” he pauses, clearing his throat as he looks around the room. you were in the college café, the sun shining in on the both of you. he can see the way it lights up your hair and brightens your eyes. he swallows, seeing the few people who came in and out.
“donghyuck,” the way you say his name makes his spine shiver, “are you okay?” you look curious, an eyebrow raised in accusation.
in all honesty, he wasn’t sure. because from the way he started to notice your small habits all over again, he wasn’t sure at all. he could see you starting to pick at the corners of the pages, your eyes switching from one of his eyes to the other, your face relaxing as you waited for a response out of him.
he nods his head, regardless of being unsure, “yeah, i’m fine. i think i’m just tired. i mean, come on, nine in the morning?” he makes a disgusted face, twisting in displeasure as he glances up at the clock for a brief second.
you scoff, eyes going back to the book, “don’t tell me then.”
at this, donghyuck can’t help the surprise from etching itself onto his face. his eyebrows shot up, eyes widening and mouth twitching. he watches as you look boringly at the thick pages in front of you. you were undoubtedly genuinely reading it, judging from the way your eyes were scanning just like before he interrupted. hyuck can’t help from his brain starting to wander. were you upset? he had no clue, because if you were then you were being quite passive aggressive about it. which he guessed would be about right with you. but it didn’t change the fact that he felt... guilty?
you break the silence first before he can catch up to his thoughts, “you’re distracting, i’m trying to read.”
“am i that attractive?” hyuck puts up his front again.
you stare for a second too long, which makes him nervous. you end up not saying anything as you close your book, and he finally notices the cup of coffee on the table. you take a big gulp, scrunching up your nose at the slightly bitter taste. he takes a sip of his own drink, the cold liquid running down his throat.
“i’ll see you later, donghyuck,” you state, and he’s quick to react.
“where are you going?” he furrows his eyebrows.
you slightly raise your own eyebrow, “class?” you say it like it’s obvious.
hyuck shifts in his seat, “oh, right, sorry.” he clears his throat, “see you later, y/n.”
you stare at him curiously, before finally starting to walk away after a soft nod of your head. he sighs, letting out a deep breath. it was truly getting harder and harder being around you. it was never like that with you. he found your friendship quite simple as well, so what would happen if he starts to complicate it by changing things? he didn’t mean to draw closer to the ‘complicated’ line of your friendship, he truly didn’t. but as he watched you walk away, he couldn’t help himself from wondering if you would have let him walk you there. why did he want to be closer to you?
he’ll never be closer than this. he’ll forever be stuck in this loop of uncertainty, and it almost pained him.
the thought of you pained him, just a bit.
hyuck’s sleepy eyes were barely adjusting to the bright contrast on his phone as it loudly rings. he let’s out a groan, his slumber being interrupted. when he looked at the caller, his eyes go wide and suddenly he feels wide awake. it was you. you were calling him. he checks the time on his digital clock, furrowing his eyebrows as he sees it’s one in the morning. it wasn’t super late, but it was for you. hyuck adjusts himself in his bed, sitting upright.
pressing accept, he sighs, “y/n?” there’s silence on the other line, and he assumes maybe you miscalled him and he’s about to say something more, but you speak up.
“hyuck?” his heart skips a beat as he hears you call him by his nickname. you’ve never addressed him by that, always being formal in the way you speak. so when he hears you start to break down that piece of you, his body becomes on full alert. just for you.
“yeah? i’m here.” hyuck’s voice is soft and almost giving out on him as he sits out of breath just from hearing you call him ‘hyuck’. maybe he was being a bit dramatic, but he swears you were an angel reincarnated.
“sorry, did i wake you?” your voice on the other end is so, so soft. it’s not as firm as normal and it feels like you’re genuinely giving him a part of you that you haven’t to others.
“kinda,” he clears his throat, and you hear shuffling coming from his end of the line, “but don’t worry about it. did you need something?”
your eyes scan the room of your bedroom. why did you call him? you were completely unsure. but maybe you needed to stop trying to be so ‘sure’ of everything. exhaustion was starting to get to you and for some reason, hyuck was the cure to a long day each and every time. before calling him, you were unable to sleep. tossing and turning most of the night, and your hands and mind subconciously ended up calling hyuck, leading to now.
“no, not really.” you were being honest. you didn’t need anything. “i couldn’t sleep.”
hyuck hums, and he nods his head as if you can see, “that sucks. is something stressing you out or..?”
you shake your head, thinking he can see you this time. you’re quick to answer, though, “no, not in particular. i just wanted to call you, i guess.” you shift uncomfortably in your spot, eyes nervously shifting around the room again. you were starting to grip the phone a little tighter and your lips were beginning to become swollen from biting them.
hyuck smiles, and he’s grateful you can’t see it because then you might have closed yourself off again. he couldn’t have that. “you can always call me.” it’s so genuine that it makes your head spin a bit. you weren’t quite used to this side of him, and you were sure he wasn’t used to this side of you either.
“thanks,” you pause for a bit, debating on your next words, “you, too. you can call me, too.”
hyuck chuckles a bit, making the air just a bit lighter, “thanks, baby.”
your eyes go wide at the nickname. it wasn’t uncommon for hyuck to just outright say those things, but it still shocked you when he did. your heart started to pick up speed a bit as silence was once again created on the call. hyuck almost started to panic, but he decided to be patient because at least you haven’t hung up on him. hyuck’s flirty attitude normally annoyed you. but, this time, it did the opposite. you quite liked it.
“yeah..” you sigh, pouting as your response comes out shaky and he starts to bubble up a laugh again.
“yeah?” hyuck mocks you, raising an eyebrow as he stares at his bedsheets, imaging just how you look right now. he was sure you were just gorgeous.
“shut up,” you grumble, tone slightly playful.
hyuck grins from ear to ear at this, enjoying this side of you very much, “i would love to see you make me.”
you scoff, but you can’t help the heat you start to feel creeping up the back of your neck, “i hate you.”
“you wish you did,” you can hear the smile on his face as he speaks.
you stay quiet for a few seconds, thoughtfully wondering if you were starting to ease up on him more and more. you were. but you were unsure if you liked it or not. maybe you wanted that certain closeness with him. the thought of being closer to hyuck made your stomach turn, making you shuffle around on the bed again.
“you okay?” hyuck asks after too long of a silence.
you nod, before realizing once again he can’t see you, “yeah, sorry. i just lost train of thought.”
he hums, “i do that a lot.”
“i’m aware.”
hyuck scoffs this time, rolling his eyes playfully even if you couldn’t see, “do you think i don’t think?”
“i know you don’t,” you smile, enjoying the conversations he sparks up. “hyuck, you never think before speaking.”
there was the nickname again. he tried to compose himself, “i never what before i what, now?”
you laugh, and it’s such a heavenly sound that he wants to lock up in his head forever. he wants this memory for the rest of his life. he can only really imagine the way your teeth show and your cheeks raise in a gleeful smile as your mouth produces such a happy and bright sound. his body starts to tingle just at the thought.
your eyes glance at your clock, noticing it was edging right near two in the morning, “we should sleep, it’s late.”
hyuck checks his own clock, before agreeing with you, “we should. pretty girls like you need their beauty sleep.”
you want to scoff and roll your eyes, come up with a comeback, but all you can seem to manage is a small smile on your face. “you’re so cheesy.”
“and you like it,” hyuck had a bright grin on his face.
you nod, knowing he can’t see this time. maybe you did like it. “goodnight, hyuck.”
his heart thumps in his chest as he licks his lips out of nervousness, “goodnight, baby.”
when you hang up, your body feels hot and tingly. you weren’t used to focusing so much of your time onto him, or anyone really. it was starting to make your head feel light. there was no describing the feelings hyuck gave you. and you were so unsure of where the line stood between you and him, but you were starting to not mind being unsure. because at least you had him, and you were too scared to lose that.
hyuck was growing onto you more and more.
this was ridiculous. absolutely fucking ridiculous. you let out a large breath of air, determined to start banging on the door of your ‘best friend’. just as your knuckles almost reach the door, it swings open. and you narrow your eyes at the sight of the pretty lady in front of you. you weren’t sure if the sting in your chest was because of jealousy, or if it was simply because he bailed on you for her. but to say you weren’t surprised is true. this was how it normally was with donghyuck, and that’s what created such a high tension between the two of you. you hated it. you were starting to remember why exactly you hated him in the first place. no matter how generous and thoughtful he could be, he would always be the same person he was a month ago.
“oh, hello!” she chirps with a light smile, unsure where to go with the conversation. you catch the sight of her slightly smudged lipstick and messy hair, failing to keep her composure the longer she stood there.
“hi,” you spoke firmly, like usual. you were starting to fall back into old habits between yourself and others, including donghyuck.
“are you alright-” you hear the voice of the male who bailed on you once again for a piece of ass. his face drains of color as he sees you at the door, suddenly realizing his huge mistake. but it doesn’t even phase you anymore, too used to the feeling of being disappointed by him.
“i’ll be going,” the lady speaks softly, aware of the tension in the room. you don’t watch as she leaves, stuck on glaring at donghyuck in front of you.
“this is a classic,” you scoff, your voice spilling with a vile tone.
he winces, “look, i’m sorry.”
you laugh bitterly, not once breaking eye contact, “that’s a bigger fucking classic. what kind of ‘friend’ bails each and every fucking time on them for a fuck from a girl? was it worth it? was she good?” you step closer as you reach inside his apartment, “i’ve been patient with you, donghyuck. so fucking patient. you don’t text, you don’t even call. not a single fucking notice from you, and i have to come here personally each time just to see you’re fucking yet another girl. i could give two shits who you’re fucking, but it matters when you cancel on me each time for someone else.”
donghyuck freezes in his spot. you’ve never spoken that much before, normally opting to a ‘i see’ and then leaving. the guilt sitting in the pit of his stomach is large this time. he wants to speak and tell you he’s sorry, but he realizes now that it won’t make much of a difference this time. maybe it never has made a difference, maybe you always felt this way. he was sure you did.
you huff, finally looking away from him as you turn your back to him and walk out the door that still remained open. you didn’t have much else to say to him. you hated him, and this made it final. you kept him around each and every time because he stayed by your side too. but this time was different, so different. you wondered how you could go from opening up to him to hating him again so quickly.
“y/n,” his voice sounded almost fragile. “i’m sorry, and i realize it might not make a difference this time. or any other time. but i just don’t think i’m sure of where my heart lies when it comes to you.”
you stand still, and it feels like the world did too. you weren’t sure how to react. what did that even mean? you huff, the air suddenly feeling suffocating. friendships were in no way supposed to be like this, feel like this. it was hell on both parts. why were you so afraid of letting him go? when you turn again and look at him, you see he’s avoiding eye contact with you. it was tense, neither of you choosing to speak first after his statement. you desperately wanted to leave, turn around and walk out. your heart was hammering in your chest and the blood was rushing to your head. you could even hear your heart at this point.
“i think i have feelings for you,” he gulps, eyes wandering around the room.
you scoff, “you have a sick way of showing it.” it seems that you completely skip over the meaning behind his words. you only really realize what he’s said after you spit out your comeback.
“yeah.” he’s quiet, and you’re not used to that side of him.
you believed communication was a crucial part of a friendship, but you were at a loss of words this time. where did your friendship go completely wrong? when did it suddenly become so complicated? was it secretly always this way? your mind was flooding with questions, but you couldn’t bring yourself to ask anything.
your face turns into a deep frown, eyebrows furrowing as you try to complete the thoughts in your head. nothing felt right, not a single thing. maybe that’s why you leave that night with a simple nod of your head. you were unsure, once again. and you didn’t find comfort in it. you leave that night, a million questions unanswered and so many words unsaid. and donghyuck doesn’t stop you, and you don’t turn around. you can feel yourself just itching to turn around, but you don’t. you listen to your head over your heart, once again.
you end up going days without speaking to him, avoiding him perfectly. donghyuck makes no effort into communicating with you either, making it a lot easier to avoid him. as days pass, and as those days turn into well over a week, you can feel a hole starting to create itself in your heart. you were slowly starting to tear yourself apart each and everyday. was donghyuck truly that important to you? you tried filling the empty spots with studying and lots of sleep but no matter what you do, nothing ever felt right. nothing could fill that certain type of void that you knew, in a way, belonged to donghyuck. he was the comfort after a long day, no matter how many times he had disappointed you. you hated how much a part of you knew you needed him in your life. you hated that donghyuck had that kind of power over you.
you sigh, tears starting to prickle in your eyes. you scan across your desk in front of you, seeing the endless papers and pens and pencils laying there. you were slowly starting to understand what donghyuck meant when he said he didn’t exactly know where his heart laid when it came to you. because you were starting to become unsure of where your own heart was when it came to him. you desperately wanted to hate him. you shoved that certain idea in your head for so long just to avoid these kinds of feelings. maybe a part of you knew you couldn’t keep that up forever.
you jump when you hear your phone starting to ring, the annoying sound filling the once silent room. you search under the piles of papers, finally coming in sight with the device. when you see the caller, your stomach drops and your heart picks up. of course it was donghyuck. you stare at the screen for what seems like hours, before watching as the call automatically declines. you wanted to answer, but your fingers wouldn’t let you hit accept. your body froze, and your muscles seemed to stop working just for that small moment.
you let out a strong breath of air, wiping away the excess tears. you were starting to run out of energy. you quickly became exhausted, eyes drooping as you lightly place your phone back down. simply thinking about donghyuck was becoming draining, and you just wished you could turn that part of you off. the part that secretly cared so deeply for him. the part that wanted to keep trying for him. the part that kept bringing him back in, each and every time. but maybe you knew there was no turning that off.
there was no turning back from caring for donghyuck.
two whole weeks of not talking to donghyuck, and you were starting to fall into this sickly slow routine. it felt like days were dreadfully passing one by one. as you were studying, you hear a knock on your door. and you already assumed who it was, your brain starting to come back to its senses. and you don’t seem to hesitate this time as you make way to the door, swinging it open just to come in contact with honey brown eyes. you hated how significantly beautiful he looked, even with bags under his eyes and messy hair.
“i hate you,” you breathe out, your chest tightening the longer you look at him.
“i know,” he says, and you almost want to cry from hearing his voice after so long. “i know you do.”
“you’re such a fucking jerk, donghyuck.” and you fall into him. your body slugs its way into his arms, and he accepts you like you belong there and nowhere else. and maybe you did, but you weren’t admitting that anytime soon. your arms wrap around his torso, holding him so tightly you were almost worried for his lungs and ribs. but he didn’t seem to care. he just held you, his own arms wrapping around your shoulders and tugging you closer.
you can make out the scent that’s so distinctively him, your hands starting to fist into his shirt and causing it to wrinkle. you hold onto him and this moment so tightly. you were almost afraid he would disappear. why did you need him so bad?
when you start to pull away, he lets out a sigh. you can see just how exhausted and tired he was. “i’m sorry.” his voice is hoarse, and his eyes are barely awake.
“fuck you.”
you press your lips to his. and there’s no describing the feeling you get when he kisses you like you are all he needs in that very moment. his hands are on your body quicker than you can imagine, and your own are in his hair, tugging and pulling to bring him closer. he lets out a noise of approval, his hands traveling up your shirt to feel your bare skin. you shiver, the action not going unnoticed by the boy you’re kissing. you don’t feel sparks, but you do feel butterflies starting to form in the pit of your stomach. donghyuck was not the person you needed, but he was desperately what you wanted.
he makes his way into your small complex finally, shutting the door behind him as he kisses you for all he’s worth. and you feel that hole in your heart beginning to be filled the longer you kiss him. his tongue swipes along your lower lip, asking for access to which you grant him. the world seems to be falling into place for that small moment.
“bed,” you huff, pulling apart from him. he nods his head, eagerly leading you towards your bedroom.
he’s quick to push you down, and you’re quick to place your lips back on his, your fingers already pulling at the strands of his hair. you noticed it grew just a bit longer than usual, but you weren’t complaining in the slightest. donghyuck hums against your lips, exploring your mouth with his tongue and making you let out a sweet sound that goes straight to his ears. he can’t help himself from pressing into you, his hips rolling against yours. he needed to hear more of you, he was already addicted to the noises you made.
this prompted him in pulling away, earning the cutest whine from you. he chuckled at you expense, “i’m not going anywhere.” he licks his lips, “can i remove these?” he tugs at the hem of your sweatpants, looking at you for approval. when you quickly nod, he smiles angelically and makes quick work of removing them. he takes notice of the shirt you’re wearing, realizing that it belongs to him. “miss me that much?” his hands feel along your thighs, the skin soft under his fingertips.
“yes,” your response surprises him, his eyebrows shooting up. “it smelled like you.” he takes in the sight of your innocent eyes scanning him, the teary look making his heart beat wildly in his chest.
“fuck,” he lets out. he licks his lips again, “i want to eat you out.”
you laugh softly, “do you?” he nods. “i want to suck you off, though.” you pout, your hands starting to trail down to his own pair of sweatpants. he looks at you for a moment, before something clicks in his head. you’re about to ask what he’s thinking of, before he abruptly flips the two of you over. you let out a soft yelp, “donghyuck-”
“sixty-nine,” he says simply, taking sight of you straddling him. “ride my face and suck my cock.” you wiggle on top of him, feeling his hard on. he groans a bit, “please? i really want to taste you.”
you take a moment to think it over, before finally nodding your head, “okay.” he smiles at you as he makes quick work of his own shirt, making you follow right after. when his eyes come back to you, you’re shirtless and your breasts are right in front of him. he lowly curses under his breath, admiring just how beautiful you really are.
“holy shit,” he mentally devours you, his hands making way along your sides and going to cup you. you sigh into his hold, his fingers starting to pinch and pull at your nipples. the sweet mewl you let out makes his cock twitch in his pants. you grind against him, eyes starting to close out of bliss. “fuck, baby. so pretty.”
you whine, “please, donghyuck.” you open your eyes again to look at him, “let me suck you off.”
he groans, “fuck, yeah, okay.” he lets go of your breasts, trailing his hands to your panties. “take these off.” you nod your head, making quick word in slipping them off, leaving you completely bare for him. he takes in the sight of you once again, you were truly too beautiful for this world. so perfect in his eyes.
your hands tug at his sweatpants, “take these off now.” you smile sweetly at him, something he’s not quite used to. he’s not sure he ever would be. he follows your command, and you watch as his cock springs free from his underwear and sweatpants. you can’t help from licking your lips at the sight, wanting nothing more than to have him in your mouth. he was so pretty.
“turn around and sit on my face.” his words were so vulgar, but he says them like they’re the most casual thing in the world. you can feel your body starting to heat up, following what he said. when you start to inch closer to his face, you become more aware of how close he is to your pussy. “don’t be nervous. fuck, please don’t be nervous. you’re so damn pretty like this, so wet.”
you feel his hands make way to your thighs, his fingers digging into the skin there, “donghyuck..” you want to say more, but he’s already working on your core before you can get anything else out. you gasp, a sound of surprise leaving you and turning into a soft whine. he revels in it, wanting more and more out of you.
“so sweet, too,” he hums against you. the vibrations make you curl forward, suddenly aware of his cock that sat there painfully hard in front of you. two could play, you thought. when your hand shakily wraps around him, slowly going up and down, he groans against you and pulls away for a second. “fuck, okay.”
he quickly dives right back into your pussy when he feels you spit on his cock before licking up the base. he sighs, his tongue running along your folds before pressing into your clit. you moan as you suck on his tip, one of your hands gripping tightly onto his thigh while the other is wrapped around his dick. he’s heavy and hot on your tongue, but it’s so hard to focus when hyuck begins to moan against you and dip his tongue inside of you, curling it to reach a certain spot.
“hyuck,” you call out his name, and his ears perk up at the sweet sound. he works his tongue against you faster and your hips buck against him, wanting more.
“such a sweet, pretty cunt.” his words make you take him back into your mouth as far as you can go, slightly gagging around him. he lets out a choked groan, the sound going straight through you as his tongue continuously curls inside of you. it feels so fucking good, your mind turning hazy as you try your best to bob your head and stay focused on him. when you pull back from his cock, a string of saliva attaches there between your lips and you let out a loud moan of his name when you feel him press his fingers against your clit. you lazily jerk him off, your head resting against his thigh.
“fuck, fuck. hyuck, you’re so good, feels so good.” he hums, speeding up again and making you start to grind down against his tongue and fingers. you swirl your tongue around the head of his cock and moan, the vibrations making him buck his own hips into your mouth.
“shit,” he curses, “just like that, baby.” he feels as you start to speed up your own ministrations, bobbing your head quicker and wrapping your hand around what you can’t reach. “my pretty girl, fuck.” his voice was trailing away from him, making him go right back to tongue fucking you. you were so, so close. you could almost taste it.
“hyuck i..” you pull away from his cock, but your hand doesn’t stop its fast pace on him, “i’m gonna cum, shit, you’re gonna make me cum.” the hand that wasn’t rapidly jerking him off was still clutching desperately onto his thigh, and you were sure you left some kind of bruise there and some scratches. but he didn’t seem to mind as he hummed against you, encouraging you to cum.
“cum for me,” he licks you and his fingers pick up pace on your clit, making you wail out a cry, “cum on my tongue, let me taste my sweet girl.”
your hand tightens around his cock, making him hiss as you let out a string of moans and cries, your orgasm washing over you. he can’t help himself from cumming with you, the sounds you make being enough to set him off. you feel as some of his cum spurts onto your hand and even a little on your shoulder. and he licks you clean while groaning against you, helping you ride it out as you wildly buck your hips against his face. he thinks it’s the prettiest sight he has ever had the pleasure of seeing. he continues to lick you clean, and you have to swat his head away for him to stop after slowing your hand down on his dick. you roll off of him, your legs giving out on you as you lay next to him.
“you’re so pretty fucked out,” he comments, looking at you like you carry heaven in your eyes.
you laugh breathlessly, “thanks.” you lick your lips, tasting the small sheen of sweat, “you too.”
a light dust of pink spread on his cheeks, “you’re covered in my cum.”
“you’re covered in mine.” you spit back, and he laughs.
“we should clean up.” his voice is soft, and so are his eyes. his hooded lids trail across your body, admiring you once again. even when you look like a mess, he still thinks you’re the most beautiful girl to exist.
“yeah,” you agree, “shower?”
“please?” he whines, making you chuckle and nod your head.
the shower is mostly quiet, no words exchanged as the both of you clean one another off. there’s no hidden meaning this time, and it’s not rushed. you want this moment to last forever. there was no fighting, no heavy tension, and the moment wasn’t complicating like the rest. it was silent, but it wasn’t suffocating. and you could only wish for more moments like these.
the two of you wrap up in one another’s arms for the night, letting tomorrow worry for itself for the night.
you felt like you were on fire, your body burning as you catch sight of donghyuck. he was on campus on time for the first time in awhile, and it made you swim with curiosity as you start to approach him. he didn’t seem to notice you yet, eyes trained on his phone with a bored expression. when you reach him, he looks up with wide eyes, like he wasn’t expecting you. you hadn’t seen him in almost a whole entire week. you weren’t avoiding him, you just simply didn’t have the time to talk to him.
“what are you doing here? we don’t have classes together,” you pointedly ask him, eyes almost narrowing in his direction.
“come with me,” he cheekily smiles at you, like you’re really about to follow after him.
“no.” your answer is so simple, and he pouts at you.
“why? i promise it’s good.” he tries to persuade you, looking at you with a certain look in his eyes. and you hate that look, because you normally always fall for it. he was going to tear you down one day.
you feel irritation looking at him, “i have to study.” your tone was quite cold, and he seemed to catch on.
his eyes scatter around the building, “just this once.”
you roll your eyes, “no. if you want to head to the library with me, you can. but i’m not going anywhere with you.”
donghyuck stands for a minute, considering your words before finally shrugging his shoulders, “alright then. let’s go.” he smiles as you look at him blankly before finally starting to walk towards the library. you weren’t sure what he had up his sleeve, but he seemed too content for your comfort. he noticed your slightly tense shoulders, but said nothing. he just softly hums to himself, hands in his pockets as the both of you walk.
when you enter the library, you send him a look of warning to keep quiet. he just smiles like usual, making you even more uneasy. donghyuck was in no way innocent, and you knew this. maybe you shouldn’t have invited him knowing this, but a small shameful part of you was curious what he had in store for you. donghyuck would never go to the library voluntarily without having something else planned.
you walk to the back, somewhere quiet without many people. you preferred this spot over anywhere else, and suddenly you’re aware of how intimiate this all seems. you place yourself in the seat, and he makes sure to sit as close to you as possible. you huff, bringing out your books quietly and trying to ignore his presence. you had no plans of giving him the satisfaction of your attention. your mind plays several past events with donghyuck, unable to pay attention to your studies as you’re well aware of his cologne scenting up the air. you want to hate him for how much he has consumed your brain, but you can’t seem to focus on that as he lightly places a hand on your knee.
now you know what he wants.
your eyes shoot him a glare, silently telling him to knock it off. he doesn’t seem to listen as he smirks to himself, looking at your lips. you can’t seem to deny the intriguing feeling you get as he runs his hand up higher to your thigh. you can feel his thumb rubbing in circles, practically burning holes in your clothes. you break eye contact, hands hastily clutching onto the book in front of you. but you never once tell him directly to stop, and he takes it as a sign to continue. it fills his pride, and you know it does. you curse to yourself in your head. you shouldn’t be giving him what he wants so quickly. but you can’t help yourself from slightly spreading your legs when his hand inches higher and higher before finally hovering over the button on your jeans. he watches your face, licking his lips as he imagines kissing them to distract you. his hand is hot against you, making you slightly squirm.
he lowers his face to your ear, “can you be quiet?” his tone is teasing, and you immediately want to slap him. but you also desperately want him to finger you.
you’re suddenly aware of where you are, looking around with panic, “here?” you ask back in a hushed whisper before looking at him. he was really close to you, you could practically taste the mint of the gum in his mouth.
his lips quick up, “i asked you to go somewhere else earlier, but you refused.” he lightly kisses your cheek, his fingers starting to move again and make work on your button and zipper, “so i’ll just have to finger fuck you here, hm?”
you look at him with soft eyes, and he admires you for a minute. you weren’t normally obedient towards him, always having to argue against him. but you couldn’t seem to stop the soft nod of your head as you spread your legs wider for him. he’s almost just as surprised as you, but neither of you say anything. his hand makes its way inside your jeans, cupping your heat over your panties. he watches as your tense shoulders start to sag and you ease into his touch, it fuels his ego. he hears the soft sigh you let out when he presses his fingers against your clit, rubbing in agonizingly slow circles. you direct your gaze back to the book in front of you, trying not to look too obvious. your hands are tightly clutching onto the ends, your fingers turning cold from the lack of blood. hyuck softly chuckles, watching you closely.
“you’re so cute,” he presses his fingers harder and starts moving quicker, “and you’re getting so wet, soaking your panties.”
your walls flutter against your own judgement, and you don’t say anything as he whispers soft dirty words in your ear. you gasp when he finally moves his hand inside your panties, fingers making direct contact with your wet pussy. he swirls his fingers around your hole, spreading the wetness along his fingers. he watches as your breathing becomes heavier, but he really wants to watch you try to keep your composure. he slowly inserts one of his fingers inside of you, and he watches as your eyes start to flutter shut.
“dripping cunt,” he leans closer to you, nipping at your ear softly, “so snug around my fingers. i wonder how tight you’ll be around my cock.”
you bite at your lower lip to prevent any noise coming from you as he inserts another finger inside you, pumping too slowly for your liking. donghyuck licks his lips again, enjoying the sight of you and feeling your body starting to heat up. his cock was becoming hard just watching you.
“faster,” you huff out, sounded quite breathless. you didn’t want to sound so effected by him, but it was getting harder and harder. “please..” you plead him so quietly, he was almost unsure if he heard you right. but when you look at him with hooded eyes, he knows he heard right.
he can’t seem to deny you, moving his fingers at a faster pace. the slight constriction of your jeans makes his palm rut against your clit, causing extra stimulation and making you shudder. he watches as your body reacts so perfectly to him. how could someone look so pretty? he was truly lucky that no one was around, because they’d definitely know what was happening from the way hyuck was staring at you right now. when hyuck curls his fingers upward with each harsh thrust, you let out a soft sound and immediately cover your mouth with your hand.
“feel good, baby?” he asks, looking at you with sickeningly sweet eyes. “you like my fingers inside you? inside your pretty pussy? i can feel just how wet and tight you are.”
you sigh, closing your eyes as your mind turns hazy from pleasure, “hyuck.” his name sounds so pretty and beautiful coming from you, even in a soft whisper. he finds himself completely whipped for you in that moment. he wants nothing than to please you.
“yes, angel? what does my baby need?” his voice is low and raspy in your ear, making you clench around his fingers.
“wanna cum,” you open your eyes and look at him while removing the hand from your mouth, your lips almost touching his. he swallows at the sight of you so fucked out from just his fingers. “let me cum, make me cum. please.”
he nods his head quickly, “anything for my pretty girl, anything.” he kisses your temple as you face the direction of your book again, nowhere near focused on it. he hears the soft whimper you make when he picks up his pace more, curling his fingers and making sure to rut his palm against your throbbing clit. it feels so good, he knows exactly what to do. and you find yourself becoming achingly close to your release, one of your hands reaching down to grab onto his thigh. your nails dig into his skin, and he watches with awe, admiring you like you’re the most beautiful creature to exist on earth. and he thinks you are. he imagines your nails digging into his arms and back as he makes you cum on his cock, but that’ll be for another time.
“i’m so.. close,” you whisper, your eyes squinting shut as your hips twitch.
“cum for me,” he urges you, “cum around my fingers, princess. right in this library where anyone can see.”
you shudder, your body seeming to comply to his words. your nails press into his skin so harshly, he’s almost afraid you’ll draw blood from his thigh. but he doesn’t care as he hears you utter out a soft whimper of his name, cumming right around his fingers and completely falling apart. he sees as you struggle to keep quiet, opting to rest your head on his shoulder while you nuzzle your face into his neck. he can hear your little whines so clearly and feel your breath there. it makes him swell with pride that you’re in this state all because of him. he works you through your pleasant high until your tugging at his hand and pulling it out of your pants.
“fuck,” you sigh, buttoning and zipping up your pants as quick as you can. “i hate that you just did that.” your tone is so harsh but it doesn’t effect him in the slightly. he just pops his fingers in his mouth, tasting your sweetness.
he hums as he releases his fingers, “you taste so good.”
you hush him, hitting him lightly on the shoulder and looking away from him. you look at your abandoned book that you dropped on the table while in the middle of getting absolutely finger fucked by your ‘best friend’. you huff, still unsure if you even considered him as a friend after everything. you hated him, but you didn’t. it made you almost uneasy, but you try your best to hide it as you look back at the boy next to you. he runs a hand through his hair, looking at you curiously.
“i have classes,” you state simply, gathering your books and placing everything in your bag. he watches you with a raised eyebrow.
“that’s it?” he asks.
you furrow your eyebrows, “i have classes. i’m not skipping them.”
“i’m so hard right now, though.” he whines a little too loudly.
your eyes go wide, placing a hand over his mouth, “god, shut up!” you hurriedly whisper, “take care of it yourself, i didn’t ask you to finger me.”
“you loved it, though.” he smiles cheekily again as you remove your hand from his face.
you roll your eyes, “bye, donghyuck.”
he watches as you walk out, his cock hard and his heart suddenly feeling empty. a part of him wanted more than that. not just sex-wise, but he wanted you completely and wholly. he sits back in his seat, sighing to himself. he really wasn’t sure how else to exert his feelings towards you other than this.
he really fucked himself this time.
your eyelids were heavy, and your head was pounding. you were inevitably tired, completely exhausted. walking out of your last class of the day, you’re greeted with a bright smile and gleaming eyes from the man himself, lee donghyuck. over the course of the month, the two of you starting hanging around each other more and more. but it was never casual, always leading to something ‘more’. you assumed this was what others called friends with benefits, but you were still on the fence of calling him your friend. you really shouldn’t feel that way, but you couldn’t help it. you guessed for now, donghyuck was just someone you were fucking around with. you haven’t had actual sex yet, but you assumed it would come sooner or later. the thought crossed your mind several times, but it never came up with him. you weren’t complaining too much, though. he could eat pussy like a god and finger you well enough, and you didn’t mind sucking him off and giving him handjobs.
donghyuck, on other hand, was internally struggling and you had no idea. he was slowly dying on the inside. donghyuck wanted more out of you, but he had no way of asking properly. he had no way of addressing anything to you. he always had a hard time putting his feelings on the line, especially when it came to you. the both of you were never really like that. it was always a simple exchange, never being too intense or filled with too much emotion. he saw you as distant, or simply in another world in your own head. he wanted to be apart of your world. he wanted to be your world. but he had no idea how to be. and you’ll probably never know that.
“how was class?” donghyuck nods at you, greeting you easily like he wasn’t freaking out inside. you don’t notice any different.
“fine.” you sigh out, eyes tiredly gazing at him. he seems the way you barely keep them open, pouting at you.
“you didn’t get enough sleep, did you?” he sounds concerned, but you brush it off.
“no,” you pause for a second, adjusting the strap of your bag so it’s over your shoulder with more ease, “i was up studying most the night. time got away from me so easily.” you sounded so exhausted, he was almost worried. oh hell, he was worried. he knew he was worried for you.
“wanna cuddle and sleep?” he raises an eyebrow at you, the question sound too inviting to you.
you look at him curiously, before slowly nodding your head, “i’m so tired.”
hyuck grins from ear to ear at you agreeing, “my place or yours?”
“yours,” you answer quickly, “my neighbors suck, i barely sleep there.” you grumbled with a sour expression, and he chuckles at your cute tone.
“that sucks,” he says, walking along your side as you both make it to his car. he opens the door for you, just like he did this morning. donghyuck was now giving you rides to and from college, being way too doting but you don’t complain or make objections. he was grateful for it, and so were you.
as he situates himself in the car after helping you in, he drives away with ease. you watch as he becomes focused on the road, his occasional furrowed eyebrows as he silently becomes angered by the drivers around him. it was actually quite endearing, and you liked watching him so closely. you assumed he didn’t notice or mind, but in reality he was way too aware of your eyes. they were burning into his skin and a part of him loved it way too much, and the other part wished you would look away from him. he could feel his neck and ears starting to get hot, but he tries to brush off the feeling of your eyes on him. he sighs when he finally reaches his apartment complex, looking over at you as he parks the car.
“let’s get you rested,” hyuck smiles brightly at you, and you notice a soft dust of pink across his cheeks but you don’t say anything.
“can’t wait,” you yawn, stretching out your arms as donghyuck makes his way out the car and to your door. he holds his hand out for you to take, and you look at him gratefully. his palm feels so warm in your own as you take it in your own, feeling just how soft it really was. his slender fingers wrap around your hand, and you feel almost flustered. when he lets go of your hand, you almost want him to keep holding onto you. you shake off the feeling immediately.
walking to his apartment was quiet, but for once it was comfortable. it wasn’t a suffocating silence like most times between the two of you nowadays. it felt nice being able to be around him like this for the first time in awhile. when you make it to his door, he opens it for you and waits for you to walk in first, holding his arms out in gesture for you to walk in. he has a bright smile on his face, like usual. you start to find it more and more charming as the days go by, and that develops a fear inside you. you wouldn’t be able to handle loving him. the thought alone made you more cautious and more anxious.
“do you want some of my clothes?” donghyuck closes his front door, taking off his shoes with you as the two of you make it to his bedroom. you place your bag next to the bedroom door, another yawn escaping you.
you nod your head, “please?” you ask cutely, and he lowly chuckles.
“anything for you,” he smiles, handing you some of his clothes. you take them with a warm smile of your own, and he feels his heart start to flutter. when you start to strip in front of him, he raises an eyebrow as he watches you with a close eye. “right here?”
you roll your eyes, “it’s not something new for you to see, donghyuck.”
hyuck simply smirks to himself, watching you as you change. when you slip his shirt over your head, he finds it quite endearing. you look pretty in his clothes, and he decides he’ll offer you his clothes more often just to see you wear them. you don’t wear pants, simply slipping your own off and leaving you in panties and his shirt. he admires you like you’re a work of art, and he believes that you are. he moves closer to you, wrapping his arms around your body. you jump slightly, feeling his chest pressing into your back. when he starts to press soft kisses along your neck and up your jaw, you ease into his hold. he feels you slump into his chest, and watches as your eyes flutter close.
“too tired,” you groggily answer, and he laughs against your skin, making a shiver run down your spine.
“i’m not expecting anything,” he mutters, the vibrations traveling through your body, “i just wanted to kiss you.”
you hum, resting your head against his shoulder as you look over at him. he was incredibly close, you could feel his breath fanning your face. he looks at your lips, making you unconciously lick them. his own quirk into a small smile, before leaning over to press a soft kiss to your lips. this kiss feels so different, and it sends your mind swirling. there wasn’t a hidden intention, and his hands were soothingly rubbing your sides. his lips were so soft against your own, slowly kissing one another. it feels unfamiliar coming from him, but you were too tired to really do anything or think too much about it. it feels... good. you discover that you like kissing him like this. your mind feels floaty by the time the two of you part, looking into one another’s eyes as he rests his forehead against your own. he looks so pretty up close like that, and he can say the exact same for you.
“let’s get some rest,” he whispers, slowly pulling apart from you. you subconciously follow after him, your body suddenly drawn to him like a magnet and needing to be near him. when he lays down, he opens the covers for you to slot yourself next to him. you ease into him so easily, and it feels more comfortable than normal. it feels less out of the ordinary, and more like...home. resting in his arms, felt like a certain different type of home. the kind you never wanted to leave. but you don’t struggle against him, and you don’t try to escape that feeling for the time being.
donghyuck may have always been home to you.
“i don’t get it,” you huff, eyebrows furrowing in the direction of the boy in front of you. he looks at you with nervous eyes, scanning your face and trying to read the room. he had no idea what you were thinking right now, and that terrified him. “i really just don’t get you. at all, donghyuck.”
hyuck lets out a breath of air, and he’s starting to feel the same way that you do. he didn’t exactly understand himself either. he was never sure where his feelings sparked up, or how they developed. the two of you sat together on his couch, in the middle of kissing before donghyuck abruptly pulled apart from you with wavering eyes. you tried to ask him what was wrong, but he just shook his head. you wanted to know what was wrong, but you knew he most likely wouldn’t say. you never opened up, so you didn’t expect him to either. the two of you were stuck in that cycle.
“sorry,” he mumbles, slowly shuffling away from you.
there’s a strong silence being created in the air as the minutes go by. you weren’t sure how to go from there. your mind was starting to flood with possibilities of the way your current relationship with donghyuck would go. you stare at his features, watching as his jaw starts to tighten under your gaze. his eyes fall onto his hands that are fiddling with the ends of his shorts, and he only lightly licks his lips. he can taste the excess of your chapstick, making him frown. it truly pained him, because he wished your kisses were out of love, and not out of lust.
“don’t be,” you say quietly, still inspecting him from your seat. he looks at you briefly with a small smile before looking away again. his eyes were almost empty, and it made you start to worry. “tell me what’s wrong.”
“nothing,” he tries to assure you with a smile again, looking you in the eyes again, but maintaining eye contact this time. you frown at him this time, knowing that’s not true. you didn’t want to force him into talking, but it bothered you that he was struggling and not saying anything to you.
you were completely unaware it was about you.
you didn’t know what to do. you felt like you were stuck, frozen in place. you ease into your spot on his couch, sitting criss cross next to him. donghyuck returns to his gaze on his lap, his fingers now intertwined with one another. he screwed up, he really screwed this up. if only he wasn’t so hesitant about everything that involved you, maybe he could ease up again. but he realized that would never be the case. for as long as you were around, he wasn’t going to be able to escape this feeling. everything about you seemed to drive him crazy. the way you would laugh, the way your chapstick stained his lips after kissing, the way you smelled like his own version of home. no matter what, he was convinced you would have always been a big part of his life. a huge part of him was grateful to have met you. he would never feel like he deserved you after everything, and a strong part of him felt sorry. he will never understand why you stayed for so long, but he truly wouldn’t be able to thank you enough.
donghyuck looks at you again, seeing how you sit patiently next to him. he then realizes that’s how it had always been. you waiting patiently for him while he figures his shit out. every single time, it had been you. his eyes well up suddenly while you sit, unaware of his current debate in his head. your eyes were scanning over your phone, scrolling through whatever app you were on. he admire the way the screen lights of your face, created a gleam in your eyes under the dim lighting of the room. you were beautiful like that, and he noticed the way you would scrunch your nose when you saw something you didn’t quite enjoy. he noticed the small twitch in your thumb as you pause to read something. he was noticing small details that you were probably unaware of. he found them endearing, all because they were you.
suddenly, hyuck slowly takes the phone out of your hand. you look at him with curious eyes as he turns it off, placing it on the coffee table and looking you deeply in the eyes. you feel your heart starting to pick up speed again. his stare was turning intense, making you want to scoot away from him almost, but you don’t. you stay put as he tries to figure out just what he wants to do. and donghyuck feels his own heart thumping against his chest. you would always be patient with him, he realizes.
“you mean the world to me.” it’s so abrupt, and you open your mouth slightly in shock as your eyes go wide. “i’ve discovered so much these past few months. and it’s not just because we created some kind of friends with benefits thing here, but i realized this was coming for a long time now.” his eyes never leave yours. “you’re always there. you’re always in the back of my mind no matter what. you’re the only person who has stuck by me through everything. you’re the only one who makes me feel this way, the only one who makes me question everything. you’ve made such a huge impact on my life, believe it or not. and i believe you will always be a huge part of me.” hyuck lightly grasps your hands in his, and you feel your body freeze in place, “i will never be able to get you out of my mind, because you are my home, i’ve discovered. you will always be home.”
time stands still. everything stands still. not much else mattered in that moment other than hyuck. he was staring you down, and you realize he was probably waiting on a reply. but you had no idea what to say after that. what were you supposed to say? you look him in the eyes, seeing the world in his honey brown eyes. donghyuck was in no way always good to you, you know this. your dynamic was actually quite toxic at some point. neither of you knew how to outwardly put your emotions on the line. but as you look at him in that very moment, you realize maybe hyuck was all you needed. you realized you would always end up caring for him, no matter what phases he goes through. and he knows this. he knows you will always be there, and he promises in his head that he will do the same for you now. you deserved that, at the very least.
you don’t say anything as you slowly lean forward to press a sweet kiss to his lips. he accepts you completely, the taste of your chapstick putting him under a spell. your hands leave his to trail along the nape of his neck, fingers lightly massaging his scalp in reassurance. he knows there probably wasn’t much you could have said in that moment, so he just kisses you back. he kisses you like he truly means it, and you can feel his emotions pouring out of him. his own hands grasp onto your hips, urging you to come forward onto his lap. the kiss remains slow and sweet, sending you into a frenzy. you weren’t used to kissing him like this, but you definitely weren’t complaining. it felt right. you knew this was right where you were supposed to be.
hyuck’s thumbs trace soothing circles into your hips as his hands lightly travel up under your shirt, but they don’t go anywhere. his hands are glued to the skin of your hips, sending a shiver down your spine when he lightly nips at your bottom lip. he smiles, before letting his tongue slip in your mouth. you let out a soft noise of approval, and he can’t seem to adore you any more than right now. he wishes he could stay like this forever.
when he pulls back, he sees the way your lips shine and your eyes glitter for him. he rests his forehead against yours after placing a soft kiss to your cheek, “i only need you.”
you softly smile, and he feels his stomach flip at the sight, “me too.”
he would not trade this, or you, for anything or anyone else.
you gasp for air, your back arching up as donghyuck works his fingers inside of you at a fast pace, his kisses marking along your neck, “feel good, baby? you’re so wet.” he hums in your ear.
you let out a strangled sound, “fuck, feels good. so good.”
he adores seeing you fall apart for him like this. you’re displayed so deliciously for him on his bed, and he wants to devour you. he curls his fingers up as your hands start to claw up his arms, indicating you were becoming close. you weren’t entirely sure how you ended up like this with him, but you felt too good to really care. your relationship with donghyuck was still undefined, but the two of you still haven’t stopped whatever the hell this was. you didn’t exactly mind, the air was less tense between the two of you at least.
hyuck bites your neck softly, teasing you, “gonna cum, princess? all over my fingers?” the moan you let out sounds like heaven to his ears, but for some reason, he wants to watch you suffer. maybe he was a bit cruel, because next thing you know, he’s withdrawing his fingers from your sopping core. you squirm below him and try closing your thighs together, only to be stopped by his body hovering over you. you whine, eyes shimmering under the light.
“what the fuck?” you ask, out of breath and clearly annoyed, “let me cum, hyuck, please.” he adored your begging, almost as much as he adored the way you said his name.
“you want to cum?” he tilts his head as he licks his fingers clean, your arousal covering them. you huff, throwing a small fit in front of him. he chuckles lowly in his throat, enjoying this side of you. “how about cumming on my dick then, hm?”
you lick your lips before nodding your head, “please?”
the way you beg for him makes his ego sky-rocket, his head feeling like it’s floating. the two of you haven’t fucked before, but the idea of his cock inside of you made you eager. you wanted all of him, and you could tell by the way hyuck quickly takes off his underwear that he wanted you too. you smile to yourself as he reaches for a condom, but you catch his hand before he can start looking. he looks at you with curious eyes.
“i’m on the pill, and you’re clean, right?” you ask, and he licks his lips before nodding at you.
“yeah, of course.”
“then you can cum inside me,” you bite your lower lip, staring at him with bright eyes.
he curses under his breath, “fuck.” he returns back to completely hovering over you, “are you sure?” he softly kisses you, trailing his sweet kisses down your cheek and jaw to your neck.
you smile in thought, “always.” your arms circle around his neck, softly tugging at his slightly long hair. he looks at you with adoration, before reaching down and slowly pushing his cock inside you. he stretches you out, making you gasp as you feel every single inch of him. “oh, fuck.” you sound strained, making him stop with worried eyes. you laugh a bit, “keep going, hyuck. please.” you sounded so out of breath.
he kisses your neck again, hissing at just how wet and hot and tight you were around his cock, “shit.” one of his hands grip onto your hip tightly, the other beside your head and clutching onto the sheets. your own hands were in his hair, tugging at his strands. “so tight, baby. you’re so fucking tight and warm, so snug around my cock. you were made for me.” he huffs, licking along your jaw before sucking there.
you let out a pleased sound, wiggling your hips as he bottoms out, “move, please. wanna feel you, want you to fuck me.” one of your hands travel down to his back, lightly pressing your nails into his skin as he immediately follows your request. you can feel the drag of his cock inside you, and you can’t deny just how good he feels. “oh god, hyuck.” your nails press just a bit harder, not enough to cause alarm.
“so good, baby.” he praises you, his own breath is being swept right out of his lungs as he feels you clench around him, “you’re doing so good, feels so fucking good.” he lets out a groan, his hips moving at such a steady rhythm. and while you love it, you want more. you need more.
“more, faster.” you kiss his shoulder as he nuzzles his nose against your cheek, “please, go faster, hyuck.”
and he can’t seem to deny you, speeding up the thrust of his hips. you can feel his cock hitting right against your sweet spot, making you arch your back up and press your chest to his. you let out a whine of his name, telling him to keep right there. he quickens his pace again, this time with his cock pushing right against where you need him most. and it feels so fucking good, making you throw your head back against the pillow with your eyes shut. he admires you, seeing just how pretty you look losing yourself on his cock.
“such a good girl,” he hushes, hearing the small mewl you let out at the praise. he chuckles, sweat starting to form on his body as he keeps up the fast pace of his hips. you were so tight around him, he was going to start losing his mind soon. you were clenching around his dick so much, and he knows you don’t mean to but, fuck, it was driving him insane. “baby..”
your nails press into him harder as a response, “wh- what?”
hyuck licks his lips, “look at me.” he kisses you on the lips, “please?” when you slowly start to open your eyes, you immediately want to roll them back in your head out of pleasure. “there’s my pretty girl. always my good girl.”
you let out a strangled moan, “please, wanna cum.”
“already?” he starts to thrust harder into you, your heat tightening around his cock again. “fuck, so fucking greedy for my cock. you wanna cum all over me, hm? all over my cock? make a mess?”
you whine out, “please! oh god, please, hyuck. wanna cum on your cock.”
his dick twitches, but he’s not quite there yet, “can you wait? just a bit longer?”
you shake your head, “no, please..”
hyuck licks his lips as you squint your eyes shut again, tears starting to brim there. he takes sight of you, admiring what he sees. “just a bit.. longer, baby.”
you try as hard as you can to hold it, but you gasp out as hyuck presses his thumb against your clit, rubbing fast circles against the bud, “hyuck! fuck, i’m cumming, i’m gonna cum, oh fuck fuck fuck.” you thrash underneath him, feeling as your high takes over your body and you clench sporadically around him, making him slow his thrusts down just a bit.
you don’t seem to register he’s still thrusting into you before you his from being overstimulated, “you just couldn’t hold it, could you, baby?”
you shake your head, one of your hands clawing up his back as the other tugs desperately onto his hair. he loves seeing you like this, watching as your eyes open back up again with small tears in them. he licks his lips, leaning down to kiss you quickly before thrusting into you at his previous pace again as his thumb continues to rub your clit. you cry out, nails digging into him.
“o- oh fuck! hyuck please, please..” you weren’t sure what you were begging for, but you’ve never felt so damn good before.
“can you cum again then, princess? can my baby cum on my cock for the second time?” his words feel so dirty, but sound so good coming from him. “hm?” he waits for a response while he fucks you like he won’t get to for a long time.
“yes, fuck, yes. i can.” your mouth releases the prettiest sounds, going straight to his cock as it twitches inside of you. you can tell he’s close from the way his hips stutter against you, and his thumb presses harder into your clit. his thrusts were becoming desperate, making you whine. “wanna cum on your cock again, hyuck. wanna feel you cum inside me, fill me up.” you’re so sensitive, but you want nothing more than to make him cum.
“fuck,” he lets out a loud groan, “cum for me, then, pretty girl. let me fill this pretty pussy up with my cum. make you mine.”
one last thrust, and you’re coming undone around him for the second time. the way you claw at his back and practically shout his name out sets him off, feeling your tight walls grasp onto his cock. and it feels so good, so fucking good. his cum shoots inside of you, warm and full. you gasp out as hyuck bites down onto your shoulder with a groan, riding out both of your highs.
“my baby,” he kisses the spot he bit, soothing it with his tongue after. you smile at the gesture, kissing the spot behind his ear.
hyuck only pulls back after a few minutes of staying like that, watching as some of his cum falls out of you. he grins at you, making you playfully roll your eyes. he hurriedly gets a rag, making sure to clean you up well before tossing you one of his shirts while he places his underwear back on. he offers you a pair of panties with a raise of his eyebrows, and you gracefully accept it. you always kept some of your clothes here just in case, and you’re suddenly aware of how close that makes you and him.
he climbs in with you, placing a blanket over the two of you, “i really can’t get enough of you, i hope you know that.”
you smile at him, “i can’t get enough of you either.”
and you knew the both of you were telling the truth.
the air was crisp, you could feel it in your lungs. your eyes travel towards the male beside you and see the small smile on his face as he feels your gaze. your hands stay intertwined together, like you were a sweet couple who couldn’t take being apart. the two of you walk hand in hand, and there’s nothing to fear in that moment. because you had him, and he had you. you lick your lips after some time, and hyuck turns his head to look at you.
“good?” he asks with a soft tilt to his head.
you nod back, “yeah, i’m good. you?”
he smiles at you, “with you? always.”
he turns his head to the path in front of him, still continuing to walk with your hand tightly in his. the two of you were walking back to his place from a local coffee shop. it feels surreal being around him like this, and not feeling a pang of hurt lingering there or a tinge of annoyance. it feels good, though. and you really could get used to this side of your relationship. you assumed he thought the same way from the small smile that wouldn’t leave his face ever since he first saw you this morning. you smile to yourself at the thought, and you feel hyuck start to swing your hands in the air. you giggle a bit, and he’s quick to place a kiss on the back of your hand with an endearing smile.
when you finally make it to his apartment building, the both of you walk in and head towards the elevator. you could feel the both of your palms starting to slightly sweat, but neither of you make a move to let go. as the two of you hear the ping to his floor, you make way to his door. he reluctantly pulls his hand away with a shy look, scuffling around to find his keys in his pockets. he unlocks the door, before pressing his back against it and making way for you to enter. you smile at him and place a kiss on his cheek as you walk in, the familiar scent and feeling of his apartment enveloping you in a warm hug. you welcome it, looking around.
“it always smells nice in here,” you state as he closes the door and locks it. he nods as he takes his shoes off, and you follow right after him to take your own off. “it smells like you.”
hyuck walks towards you with a pretty grin, “yeah?” his arms wrap around your waist, tugging you against him. your body fits perfectly against him, you decide.
“yeah,” you breathe, looking into his honey brown eyes. he was dreams and honey. you smile in thought, and he raises an eyebrow.
“what’re you think about?” he can’t help himself from kissing your own cheek, returning your earlier gesture when you walked in.
you accept him with open arms, your hands tangling in his long hair, “we really grew.” you pause as he waits for you to continue. you frown slightly, “i used to actually hate you.”
he nods, “i know.”
you figured he knew. you stand silently as you look into his eyes. you feel as if you can see the entire universe in them, and you decide then that maybe you didn’t hate him back then.
“no,” you start, and he looks at you with a curious look, “i think i just wanted to believe i hated you. it was easier than admitting that you hurt me back then.” you lean into him further, and you can feel his thumbs rubbing your back in soothing circles. “we both had a lot of faults.”
“i had the most,” he snorts.
you shake your head, “quit that. it doesn’t matter right now, does it?”
he stares at you and shakes his head back, “definitely not.”
“if i’m honest,” you talk in almost a hushed whisper, “i believe you’re all i want, all i need. always have been.”
he rests his forehead against yours and glances slowly across your features, capturing you in his mind forever, “i only need you and only want you, too.”
you smile to yourself, before leaning in and finally kissing him on the lips. you can still taste the soft tinge of coffee on his lips, and you find comfort in it as he kisses you softly, slowly. there’s no rush in the way he kisses you. his hands burn into your skin as they travel beneath your shirt, needing to feel your skin on his. you realize then that you would do anything for the man in front of you. you would travel the ends of the earth, if it meant having him like this for the rest of your life. he was your solace at the end of it all, and you knew that now. there was no more denying him, no more denying how you felt or where the both of you stood. there were no more lines in your relationship, there were no more barriers. i was just...this. it was just you, and him. and you were more than okay with that.
when he pulls away from the kiss with biting your lip, you huff out a breath of air. donghyuck decides that you are the most beautiful human to grace the earth. he felt like he was floating in heaven right now, his head swimming and his heart soaring. he watches as your eyes flutter open, and he can feel the heat in your skin as he trails his hands along your back in a comforting manner. it was his way of showing he cared, and you knew this. you could feel the soft drag of his nails in your back, making you smile a bit from the ticklish feeling. he smiles back, adoring the way you look right now.
there were so many ways you could have left him. so many opportunities. but as you stare him in the eyes, you know you made the right choice this time. there was no more being unsure, this was right. you knew this was right. you don’t regret this one bit.
donghyuck looks at you for a bit longer, before uttering out his nexts words, “i love you.” you can see the stars in his eyes, and if you’re honest, it felt like love. it was you and him, against the world.
“i love you, too.”
he grins before pulling you back in for another long kiss. the words were music to his ears, and he wished to repeat them to you for as long as he could live. the world went quiet for the time being, not a single thing distracting either of you from one another. it was like everything was falling into place, the beats starting to make sense again. you sigh into the kiss, feeling at ease in the arms of the honey eyed boy in front of you.
he pulls back slowly, “don’t worry,” his eyes sparkle a bit, “i’m right here.”
and you were convinced that was all you needed for now.
so may you find in each other what you came here for. and trust that this is love because it is (love is trust). and tangled lives you may lead but into each other, never apart, till you can’t distinguish between being and being together.
a/n: please give this a lot of love! i worked really hard on this one, and it’s my longest fic i’ve written so far. i hope you all enjoy it! thank you so much for reading :)
