That Graphic Guy @that-graffic-guy - Tumblr Blog

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of-aurora

Reblog if you're not homophobic

Every url that reblog’s will be written in a book and shown to my homophobic dad.

bigbuffcheetohpuff97-deactivate

ive never hit reblog so fast

mikelogan7-blog

Never

Just a bunch more tattoo ideas and inspiration

#tattoo #tattoo ideas #inspiration #drawings #my drawings #doodles #teepees #mandala #black on white

Oddly this sketch looks likes it has more sides than it does

#sketch #art #inkdrawing #idk #what?

Bored little sketch of a Tp mixed with the symbol of the all seeing eye

#sketch #bored #art #inkdrawing #all seeing eye #teepee #tp #tattoo maybe

A couple of simple doodles of Tps, tattoo ideas for my sister and I

#tattoo ideas #sketch #finepoint #uni pin

A drawing for the bored times

#drawing #art #sketch #doodle #blue

impossible object

God this Tumblr doodle is hard

#doodlepost #tumblr doodles #draw me

Australian Plebiscite

I just wanna take a minute to state that I support the lgbtqia+ community and their fight for equal marriage rights, PLEASE vote towards the correction of the current Marriage act in the upcoming Plebiscite.

#lgbt #lgbtqia #Ally #australia #plebiscite #love is love #fuck haters #vote yes

I'm finding this fun, but why the he'll cant a draw down the bottom, damn

#doodlepost #tumblr doodles #draw me #why?#can't draw down?#the shit?#but yay doodle

roachpatrol

on the subject of Humans Are Space Orcs i keep thinking it would be funny if ‘pursuit predator’ humans got together with an ‘ambush predator’ feliform species. and like. humans enjoy walking around with their friends! and the feliforms enjoy huddling in a concealed location with their friends! and it takes all of half an hour for a human to pick up a scarf and make a sling to take their pal with them while they go grab some lunch.

our new friends are like ‘are you sure this isn’t an inconvenience’ and the humans are like ‘are you kidding we do this with terran cats whether they like it or not’

also the team-up of humans and the feliform species gives most herbivore species in the galaxy screaming nightmares because here is a mobile tower that will follow you for 16 hours straight and it’s carrying a bag full of sneaky murder like it’s a baby this is not okay

armortechno

That last image was just, just great

krakenartificer

Humans will packbond with anything.... whether it exists or not

So I introduced one of my friends to Stabby the Space Roomba at 21:28, and at 21:37 he took me to task for being insufficiently enthusiastic about Stabby, and at 21:59 messaged me to say “I love Stabby” And, like, it’s one thing to get attached to an actual cleaning droid. It’s even weirder to get attached to the concept of a cleaning droid. But it’s not unusual. I mean, Tumblr is built – in large part – around large groups of people who have become emotionally attached to imaginary beings. We join together with other people who have packbonded to the same imaginary things, and we call it fandom, and we create other, related, imaginary things for others to get attached to

michelletheeditor-deactivated20

Humans are weird idea: malicious compliance. The aliens either do as they’re told or place an objection if there’s a specific reason, and once ordered to perform a task they do it to the best of their ability because their authority is logical and fair. Then humans show up and start disobeying in a way that is technically correct and they have no idea what to do.

“Human, you were instructed to bring ration packs to the storage bay.”

“I did.”

“There are only two ration packs here.”

“You didn’t say how many you wanted.”

“Why would I request only two? The ship needs to be restocked with supplies for a five-cycle mission.”

“Hey, I’m not a mind reader. You’re going to have to be more specific.”

*sigh* “Human, please bring the entire pallet of ration packs into the storage bay.”

…

“Human, why is the station’s luggage transport vehicle still in the storage bay?”

“You wanted it taken back out?“

“The vehicle belongs to the station. It doesn’t even fit in the storage bay.”

“Hey, after Tau Alpha you told me not to do anything unless I was ordered to. Nobody told me the forklift needed to be put away again.”

*alien turns rather purplish and makes a low hissing noise*

“…If you want me to put the forklift back you’re gonna need to give me an order, sir.”

*more hissing*

operation-earthanoids

So this post of mine really took off it seems! Looks like there’s a lot more of these blogs than I thought, which is super cool! Also, I was at 400 followers last night (which is about 300 more than when I last checked) and now I’m on 470, so I felt like I should do something cool. So I thought “How about a blog with a list of as many ‘Humans are weird’ blogs as possible? That’d be pretty cool, and if it gets popular, then it’ll help some newer alien blogs with getting their content out there!”

So, uh, what do you think? Good idea? Bad idea? Let me know, please!

Here’s all the blogs I know of so far:

@space-australians

@human-aliens-collection

@humans-are-seriously-weird

@scifihumanheadcanons

@space-stuff-for-space-people

@humans-are-space-orcs

@what-are-even-humans

@justimaginethisweirdstuff

@pokemon-n-aliens

@odd-as-we-are

@stabbyroomba

@stabby-the-roomba

@humansarespaceorcs

@humansareweirdrebloged

@iwriteonthisblog (for your “humans are weird” series)

@spaceorc9

@space-australia-stories

@iron-sulfur-world

@onwardsuntiltheend

If you can think of any more blogs to add, let me know please!

what-are-even-humans

Reblobbing in case some of my followers doesn’t know about these blobs

sepulchritude

on the topic of humans being the intergalactic “hold my beer” species: imagine an alien stepping onto a human starship and seeing a space roomba™ with a knife duct taped onto it, just wandering around the ship

it doesn’t have any special intelligence. it’s just a normal space roomba. there are other space roombas on the ship and they don’t have knives. it’s just this one. knife space roomba has full clearance to every room in the ship. occasionally crew members will be talking and then suddenly swear and clutch their ankle. knife space roomba putters off, leaving them to their mild stab wounds.

“what is the point?” asks the alien as another crew member casually steps over the knife-wielding robot. “is it to test your speed and agility?”

“no it doesn’t really go that fast,” replies the captain.

“does it teach you to stay ever-vigilant?”

“I mean I guess so but that’s more of a side effect.”

“does it weed out the weak? does it protect you from invaders? do repeated stabbings let your species heal more quickly in the future?”

“it doesn’t stab very hard, it gets us more than it gets our enemies, and no, but that sounds cool — someone write that down.”

“but then what is its purpose?”

“I don’t know,” the captain says, leaning down to give the space roomba an affectionate pat. “it just seemed cool”

aethersea

this is the dumbest idea I’ve ever heard but I thought about it for five seconds and realized that if I were, say, a random communications officer onboard this ship and someone taped a knife to a roomba it would take maybe three weeks before even I was inordinately fond of Stabby. I would be proud of Stabby when I met up with my other spacefleet friends for space coffee, I would tell them about the time Stabby got the second mate in the ankle five seconds before the fleet admiral beamed on board and she swore in seven different languages in front of high command.

also by the fourth day Stabby would be in the ship’s log, he’d have little painted-on insignia, people would salute him as he went by, and someone would hook up a twitter account to tweet maniacal laughter and/or a truly terrible knock-knock joke every time he managed to nick someone.

tallteal

Omg so the ting I typed up might actually happen this is gold

petralemaitre

I am suddenly astonished that Stabby isn’t Farscape canon. 1812 was weird enough.

dearthoughthenightisgone

Stabby’s little charging dock would start accruing cuddly toys and commemorative holo-vids of Stabby’s greatest stabs. Its insignia would start off at a fairly low rank, but soon, without anyone every discussing it, everyone would know that Stabby got to take the rank of the highest ranking crew member it stabbed. The ceremony for Flag Admiral Stabby was beautiful. The captain gave a speech.

jumpingjacktrash

why am i proud of stabby this is irrational

bisectedbrioche

INCIDENT LOG: 46-7-2 Action #45437: Desc: Covert enemy boarding attempt

Details: Six (6) members of a Mercenary/Pirate crew of little renown attempted to infiltrate ship in order to steal equipment and/or personnel.

Prior to being detained they had remained undetected for eight (8) hours and accumulated several high value materials (see attached log), and incapacitated and restrained several crewmen (see attached log) in dock #3, with the intention of using a life boat to exfiltrate.

Just prior to their would-be escape, the boarding party encountered the ship’s mascot. A cleaning unit which had been modified by crew members to mount a traditional Terran melee weapon, as well as an officer’s insignia (having been jokingly given a commission by the Captain the night before). Curious, one picked it up, before realising the mounted weapon had a nickel finish (highly toxic to their species) on the handle, and dropped it in a panic.

As the unit’s anti-impact sensors had been disabled, it immediately tried to right itself on landing. This caused it to flip over and slash the third knee of the boarder who dropped it, prompting the rest of the boarders to flee. In doing so, they tripped over a waste container, causing the unit to “chase” them, as it collected the trail of dust they left.

The security crew were alerted to the boarding party’s presence by an entry on “Sargent Stabby’s Hit List” - an account on an intership microblogging site which automatically logs any injuries caused by the cleaning unit in question - and quickly intercepted them.

Casualties: Four (4) crewmen treated for minor lacerations sustained after detaining boarding party, one (1) captured crewman treated for negative reaction to sedatives used by captors.

Belligerent status: Two (2) members of the enemy boarding party remain in stable condition in sickbay. Three (3) remaining surrendered peacefully and remain in the brig. One (1) refuses to leave the safety of a storage cupboard he went to ground in.

Recommendations/Actions:

All captured guards to undergo debriefing and possible disciplinary action for breaches of security protocol.

Remind all crew members to report missing colleagues immediately.

Retain a guard outside cleaning storage room 87 until the final boarder can be coaxed out and properly detained.

Cleaning unit D4.87 AKA “Sargent Stabby” has been promoted to Quartermaster, and is now considered the superior officer of all autonomous drones on the ship. All Class #1 drones have been programmed to salute their superior with their effector, should it enter the room while they’re active.

theotheristhedoctor

Ok but what about that final bit - all the other space roombas respectfully standing to the side and saluting when Quatermaster Stabby comes past?

flyingwerecats

Quartermaster Stabby goes on to have many more adventures and many more promotions.

Quartermaster Stabby becomes a famous icon of the human race, proof that humans can and often are unintentionally terrifying, but maybe there actually IS something to their strange attachments to inanimate objects…?

Aliens are now convinced that humans have some weird psychic/aura powers or something. “Object Tamers” they call us. Humans are so amused that they adopt the term for themselves. They love it. They start printing it on bracelets and T-shirts. Aliens can’t tell if this is a joke or a confession.

Through a disturbing number of coincidences like the above, aliens begin to fear Quartermaster Stabby and are legitimately unsure if it has intelligence or not. It doesn’t help that humans refuse to break the joke to explain it to them.

Alien scientists try to explain the strange phenomenon that is Quartermaster Stabby. They cannot. Humans are delighted.

Quartermaster Stabby is eventually promoted to a position of authority over all autonomous drones in the entire human empire. It also escaped the ship once and managed to become the mayor of a small alien city. That city has since begun using the fact as a tourist attraction, and the episode has brought to human attention the fact that Mayor Stabby technically fulfills all of the criteria necessary to become a president or council member. (Minus the sentience.)

Humans are now trying to vote Mayor Stabby into office, using the aliens’ inability to determine its sentience level to their advantage.

They are successful. Counselor Stabby is most universally beloved representative of the human race. (Among humans, anyway. The aliens have mixed reactions, ranging from amusement, to fear, to outrage.)

Counselor Stabby goes on to somehow reveal a corrupt plot among several other counsel members and essentially averts a huge political catastrophe, all because one of the spies dropped her earring and Counselor Stabby ate it. The earring was bugged. Good call, Counselor Stabby.

Every time Counselor Stabby breaks down and has to be repaired, trillions of humans flood its social media accounts with ‘get well’ messages, and many flowers and gifts are sent to the repair bay or to its charging station.

Counselor Stabby has somehow blundered its way into receiving all of the highest honors that can be bestowed by human society. It helps run an empire. It saves lives. It cleans donut crumbs off of the floor without being asked.

All without a single sentient thought.

Counselor Stabby becomes legend.

dixeyray

The humans have started a campaign to use Counselor Stabby as a model to create better bots.

“Why does a human’s consideration for a ‘better bot’ mean more knives, sir?” the young ambassador said, staring at the contraption in front of him.

“ we are unsure of their purpose, we have many reports of these creations protecting their home ships. “ The advisor said also staring at the contraptions many spinning blades.

The residing human walked into the room squealing, quite to loud for the ambassador’s taste, at the contraption.

“ Aren’t you just a spinning bundle of death! “ The human cried out happily? (The ambassador was still unsure of humans deployment of emotions.) The delivery droid, with knife blades above its propellors, bobbed up and down before depositing it’s ‘gift’ (as the human called it) and leaving through the bot-hatch with a frightening scream accompanying it.

Thes humans, they were, well, humans. The ambassador would need to read more on their culture to even remotely understand them.