hope yāall enjoy, this will be nothing but fluff or honestly whatever yāall want. Requests are always open so please ask, just read my rules (tbh itās just common sense) , Iāll be happy to answer! Please enjoy, hope to hear from you soon~
I saw that your requests were open so I was wondering if you could do Asahi x reader? Maybe relationship headcannons? You can have creative liberty with everything else though.
Thank you ^^
ofc Anon, happy to help ya out! This is my first time writing for Asahi, but honestly it should be pretty easy, because Iām an asahi Kinnie. Love yāall sm, if you liked this, make sure to like, follow, and if you curios, just ask
warnings: Swearing, crack, fluff? Mentions of vagina? Has one section implying a AFAB reader, but is only one paragraph. If you arenāt a pussy owner, pretend itās a papercut it literally the same results. I tried to make it as gender neutral as possible.
status: edited, but at like 3am so read at your own risk
šAsahi Azumaneš
šBoyfriend Headcannonsš
First things first, Man is so freaking shy. Like goodness, he wouldnāt be able to talk to you when he has a crush on you. So, if you want results, you have to A) Be confident, and B) be in a place heās comfortable interacting in. Like at volleyball practice (Gia- Joden shut your ass up, your AsaNoya is showing.) So, for this letās just imagine youāre a second year, helping Kiyoko manage the team. Yeah that sounds a lil familiar but shhhhhhhhh, let me have this.
Once we get over the hurdle of him actually asking you out (AKA Tanaka bullying him into doing with some, if you donāt do it, I will,) Be gotta be the biggest sweetie ever. Like Iām used to writing for assholes, but I physically cannot with this man, this pure sweet chipotle bowl of a man. The most shit I can say is that heās a pussy.
Please. For the love of God (Gia- You called?) Play with his hair. He will literally melt like butter into a blushy slushy mess itās so freaking adorable.
The literal epitome of pit bull energy. Like so freaking terrifying on the outside but inside? Literally the softest thing since Japanese pancakes. And because of this, mfs be terrified to talk to you. Like even if heās so polite, things donāt change. What he says- āHi, Iām sure you didnāt know, but thatās my partner , and it looks like youāre making them very uncomfortable, could you please leave them alone.? Thank you! šøāŗļøšøā What people hear- āAye yo, what ya doing with my girl buddy? You tryna start something, Iāll fucking kick your ass *insert Tanaka face*ā. Yeah, itās a common occurrence for people to tell you to blink twice if you need help.
Even though heās canonically not planning on going to college, heās still above average in school work. Not really in terms of analysis and problem solving, so his best subjects are stuff he can just memorize like science or History. If you happen to be weak in either of those, he would be more than happy to help after practice or during weekends. Heās super patient with you and often suggests snack breaks and other things whenever it gets to much. (Because of that heās also really good at helping you through panic attacks, more on that if I do a part 2.)
In terms of cringe, the cringiest thing yāall do would be like seriously basic couples costumes. And I aināt talking joker and Harley Quinn type bs (that fr can be cute sometimes,) Iām talking moth and lamp type shit. I know itās probably adorable to some of yall but it gives me the serious ick.
Speaking of the Ick, man uses the most horrendous nicknames unironocally. He doesnāt do it all the time (especially after Tanaka nearly pissed himself after hearing him trying to be tender.) like I can just hear him saying, āHey muffin, can you grab my bag from the club room? I have to help clean up.ā (Gia- joden ewwwwww stop it thatās literally so gross.)
reads you the Bible
Yall know that one comic where itās like killer croc and his girlfriend walking around and she tells him how much she loves him and how safe he makes her feel? Yeah thatās literally yall and itās so precious. Like just imagine walking anywhere and everywhere holding pinkies (my gay lol heart is melting) while heās just being a blushy mess.
Noya is the main wingman, but still doesnāt know on how how you got together. His idea of friendly advice is, āQUICK BEING W PUSS AND ASK THEM OUT LIKE A MAN ASAHIš¤.ā
Regardless of if you are a titty owner or not, please donāt take your shirt off around him, he will literally malfunction.He will literally have an aneurysm. Like mans nosebleeds will rock him like a rocket. Like man will be in the morgue from blood loss. And we still need this man for cuddles, so no. Kill the spike not your boyfriend, can i get an amen š?
He is the most precious fluffy boyfriend possible. Like heās the sweetest of all beans. Like you could ask him to murder someone and heālll just be like, āYes Sweetie anything you say dear šøš„°šø.ā Kinda like Gojo in that one jjk scene (the Iāll murder you one)
he loves restaurant dates, but like donāt take him anywhere who only has spicy food. I love this man with all my might, but he is a serious pussy. Like my goodness has the gracious. And he wonāt even say anything about it. My poor baby will just suffer in silence. So please donāt, heās a poor baby.
This oneās for all my long hair honeys. One word. Hairties. Hairties Galore. He never has enough. And he always has them at the ready. But on the unlikely chance he doesnāt, he has no problem using your scrunchies during a game, and itās seriously the softest marshmallow man move ever. I can not emphasize it enough.
ok this man if the favorite of all of his younger cousins. Like the little dudes love just climbing on them. He physically cannot say no to them. So, whatās something they force him to do? Watch Disney princess movies with them. He knows all their names trust. His top three definitely Jasmine, Belle and Cinderella, trust me on this.(Gia- fuck sukuna, Asahi x Cinderella for life lol) He gives the most insane Disney adult energy itās insane. (Gia- joden, chill with the slander mate).
He is a living random fact generator. No I will not elaborate. He watches that kind of YouTube shorts. Heās so boring I swear to fuck.
(I had to Make Gia write this lol) This one is for all my pussy people. He gotta be the most worried individual on this side of the nuthouse whenever youāre bleeding. Like the second he hears your on the cycle itās, āOMG ARE YOU OK, ARE YOU DYING? OMG MY GIRLFRIENDS DYING, HELP WE NEED TO GET YOU TO THE DOCTORS! PLEASE DONT DIE ON ME BABY! DO YOU NEED PADS, HEATING PADS, IBUPROFEN, CHOCOLATE!?ILL GET YOU THAT, THE VERY BEST BEST QUALITY-ā please shut him tf up. Heās gonna have a panic attack, please calm him down,
for us non pussy personas, just imagine you got a paper-cut. He literally acts the same way.
For my final big thing, ima just give yaāll little addicts exactly what yall came here for: Crack. (Also yes a changed some lyrics, I aināt about to whitewash no characters)
Tanaka- EVERYBODY SAY SAUSAGE KEEP IT GOING, EGGS BACON GRITS
all- Sausage!
Noya- IMA SKINNY BITCH BUT I STILL TAKE
all- Sausage!
Bokuto- GOT A FAT ASS BUT I STILL TAKE
all- Sausage!
Oikawa- GOT A FLAT ASS BUT I STILL TAKE
all- Sausage!
Y/N- WAKE UP IN THE MORNING GOTTA EAT THAT-
all- Sausage!
Hinata- IMA RED HEAD BUT I STILL TAKE
all- Sausage!
*Literally everyone is gay in this show so Iām not including this verse*
Yachi- CUTE GIRL SWAG BUT ILL TAKE YOUR MANS
all- Sausage!
Asahi- hagsaggecgedhurdgiitg
all- Sausage!
Saiko- Big tits, and Iām thick so you know I take
all- Sausage!
Kuroo- Yeah I read but but theyāre all about
All- Sausage! Sa-Sa-Sa-Sausage, Sausage
kiyoko- I like girls, can I still take sausage?
All- AYEEEEEEE
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bro I aināt gon lie, I had so much fun writing this, but Iām sorry I took so long Anon, I love all of yall so much, but I also am smack in the middle of exam season, and your boy needs his degree. If yāall love this, then feel free to ask for more, itās free, and like and follow me. Love yāall lil freaks,
May I please ask for headcanons Aoba Johsai with a manager whose skilled with archery and sharpshooting please
Yes of course! Sorry for the wait I was working on a Rindou piece and my physics exam. Itās like 3Am right now, but I still want to finish this for you boo. Thanks again For requesting Anon, if you like this, donāt forget to like and ask if you have any other ideas. Also, you didnāt specify which you wanted, so this can be interpreted as romantic or platonic.
Status: unedited
warnings: crackfic, bad grammar, cursing, violence, oikawa exists, oikawa slander, color coded characters, reader is a whole ass menace, mentions of vaping
Oikawa, Iwazumi, Kunimi, Kiyotani, Kindaichi, Matsukawa, you
My first thought when I looked at this post was simple. How many times and we hit oikawa in the head. Everything else kinda spiraled from there. Just imagine being able to do that shit with pinpoint accuracy, and when he turns around to see who did it, be like the gremlin chick from hotel transilivania and be like ,ā I didnāt do thatā. And then he proceeds to blame Iwa, and pure unrefined chaos erupts from there. *clears throat and sips matcha* good shit
But on a more serious note, these boys are completely ready to take full advantage of your skills. Remember when oikawa sprained his ankle? Guess who had to replicate his serves instead so they could practice receives. Thatās right, you. And your aim is a little too good sometimes (Kindiachi has been hit in the face) but they honestly donāt care, they just looking to get practice in, and maybe a few tips here and there for aiming.
But thatās just during their practice. During your archery or other practice. Oh my god. Imagine having like 12 annoying older brothers. Like both Archery and Sharpshooting are pretty quiet sports. But with these mfs at your practice? Oh dear lord. These gon be the most obnoxiously loud humans to walk the planet (3rd only to Fukurodani and Kurasuno). Imagine with me. Itās so silent you can hear a pin drop. Youāre trying to concentrate before youāre pulling back your string. You take a deep breath and just as youāre about to let go- āWOOOOOOOO THATS MY LIL SISSSSSS/BROOOO!!!ā āSHUT UP SHITTY KAWA!THEY NEED TO FOCAS!ā āHOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW IWA!?ā āYOU WOULD KNOW IF YOU WEREN'T SUCH AN DUMBASS!ā
āIF YALL DONT SHUT THE FUCK UP ILL SHUT YOU UP MYSELFā yeah theyāre THAT kind of sports parents. They got kicked out last time :)
I just know yall have made oikawa put an apple on his head and see if you can hit his head. Ofc you can, but itās funnier hitting him with the Velcro arrows and watching him rip his hair out, and ruining it for the day (his fangirls hated you for that lol.)
I just KNOW that the other teams got some crazy ass conspiracies about you. They call you the Seijo Assassin, and that you kill the best players of the opposing team, and they never find the bodies. And tbh it was probably oikawa who started it, to get back at you for getting Velcro stuck in his hair. So while youāre just as hot as kiyoko, everyone is terrified of you, and are only referring to you as L/n-sama (even though youāre only a second year.). I swear to fuck hinata pissed himself when tsukki told the team about you.
also yall know the sharpshooter shaving cream balloon prank thingy? I know damn well the whole team is having a competition for who can do it best. Like itās literally so funny, especially when someone not on the team gets hit. Like I know oikawa has accidentally hit the coach with one of those. Do with this information what you will.
Individuals: Could be romantic or platonic, either way fits (though both are seriously on crack.)
Somehow or someway, Oikawa will convince you to be his bodyguard. And not even like paying you money. Just like a, ā YoU wOnT wALk yOuR pOor dEfEnSLeSS FRiEnD tO cLAss? WhAt iF my FAnGirlS Kidnap MeEEEEE?!ā
āyep.ā āDo you even Love Meeeeeee!?ā āNope.ā āā¦Iāll pay you~ā āpay me what?ā āFood~ā āDONE!ā *throws chair out window*
yeah yāallās relationship is pretty much just blitz and stolas in the loo loo land episode. Like when Stolas was just walking while Blitz is pretending to be Batman, lurking in the shadows and pointing a gun at anything with a pulse? Yeah thatās you two walking around the school, except with a nerf gun instead.
oh and you know the team jackets? He bought you yours. But not just any jacket oh no. Yours is special. He payed extra to have it say, āThe Seijo Assasin; Oikawaās bobyguard.ā He also might have gotten it in 4xl because he doesnāt know your size, but still wants it to be way to big on you so he can make fun of you. Heās an ass.
Iwazumi is much nicer on the other hand. He (regardless of if itās platonic or romantic,) is all about helping you carry your stuff. He doesnāt even ask either, he just kinda picks it up and does it. He says it isnāt a big deal, and that youāre carrying enough with your archery equipment anyway, and that he needs the weight training anyway. Def the kinda guy to use your backpack as a dumbbell and use it to lift while yāall in the hall.
I know y'all have a running competition on who can hit oikawa in the head the most. Body shots are one point, head shots are worth 2, and the groin is worth 3, especially if heās being creepy to someone. The score is currently 34-31, slightly in your favor. Whoever hits him the least by the end of the month has to buy the winner ramen. Oikawa doesnāt approve of this game, and ends up attempting to bump everything back your way. But on the bright side, itās a good way to scare off his fangirls :).
Kunimi just kinda vibes with you. Like he doesnāt really acknowledge much of what you do, just kinda goes like, ā oh so thatās why you were so good at that. I just thought you hated oikawa. Anyway can I have your Chez-its?ā Yeah my boy donāt care enough, but he cute so yeah.
also I just know this mf, plays Fortnite and vapes blue raspberry burst. Do with that what you will. ( to be clear, I wouldnāt ever vape, i just know he does, and honestly had to look up what flavors there are.
The honesty biggest thing you do that impresses him is the whole good aim card slicey thingy. Idk man, he just seems like he would be good at that, and would try to fight you on it.
Despite everything, Kyotani is actually relatively nice to you? Or at least as nice as he can be. His version of nice is avoiding you like the plague, cause heās scared youāll be scared of him. He actually really likes you and wants an excuse to talk to you. So what does he do? Asks you to help him aim while spiking, so that he can use his strength more efficiently. He actually is pretty patient with your teaching, and genuinely respects you enough to take your advice. ( tell him to shower pls, I can smell him through the screen, luv him though)
He also uses a whole bottle of axe body spray every time he walks out of the house . Be careful not to get too close to him. Please find someone strong, or stupid enough to bully him out of it, for the sake of the teams lungsš
Kindaichi is probably the only person on the team who still calls you Y/n- senpai. Heās way too precious. That being said, he still did give you a twenty if you hit kageyama with a vollyball during warmups. He may be nice, but he mad petty. And $20 is $20 man
Matsukawa is definitely a COD type of guy. He knows a lot about guns. Bond over that (then give me his number pls)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Thanks for reading, sorry the last part was rushed, I am just not feeling it rn. If yāall liked this make sure to follow, Like, and request something of your own. I literally have nothing else to do. Love yāall sm, peace
HELP I SHOULD HAVE CHECKED THE RULES BEFORE REQUESTING BUT WTH YOU ARE SO SWEET YOU DECIDED TO DO IT. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!! MWAH MWAH! AND HELPP THE HCS šš CRYING BECAUSE IT WAS SO CHAOTIC.
No problem bro, I love answering your questions Iām just sorry I was so lateš physics is absolute ass, and so are exams. Besides, when people ask bout your literal favorite anime, tf am I supposed to do, ignore it? I think not. Feel free to ask bout literally anything, Iām here, just ask! Love you AnonHereās my list of who Iām willing To write for,
To be honest, I intended for this to be almost exclusively for haikyuuā¦ BUT FOR YOU MY FRIEND! *pounds chest* I SHALL GIVE YOU THE RINNY OF YOUR DREAMS. Also you didnāt specify what kind you want so ima give you my finest shit, which happens to be my head cannon prowess. (Totally not because I hate writing dialogue, no,no, thatās so stupid š³) Also important side note: I aint spend days finishing the Tok rev manga not to use it tf outta here. Tokrev and Jjk content is welcomed proudly.
idk if Iāll make a part 2, but on the off chance I do, look foreword to girldad Rinny content.
status: unedited
warnings: cursing, slightly sexual situations (but no smut), mafia bs, blood? Fluffy bullshit, Rindou being a dick hole, the ick, my bad Spanish
šBonten Rindou Hataini. Headcannons~š
The first thing off the bat, I definitely think he is on the demisexual spectrum. I know everyone else be saying that he would be all about just sleeping around like that, but to be honest, I think that thatās more of a Ran thing. I feel like the only reason he would go to strip clubs and shit like that for work, and would actually be really grossed out when people would coddle him. If he was to have a significant other, it would have to be someone he has known for a long time, or from his old delinquent days. My best idea would be a calm friend who would give him the notes from his skipped classes. And in return heād take them out for food or some shit. Somewhere along the way yāall would just be like, āweāre totally together right?ā āDuh, why else would I put up with you.ā Yeah he a lil bitch.
Any way, as for him as an adult, all I gotta say is āMmmm PapĆ Āæquieres una besito?~ā.
Like Jesus Christ man has no right being this freaking fine. Sexy Jellyfish ass boy
This man will spoil the everlasting shit outta you, and go to Walmart for his own shit. But had does it in the most obnoxious way possible. He gets you a necklace? āHey babe, gotchu this, your old one was musty af, take better care of your shit.ā Awww you want a new dress? āSure babe, but just know that thing barely covers shit, and will be gone by the end of the night.ā You want something just random? āWtf am I a walking ATM? No, pick it tf up, Iām buying it, you canāt stop me. Quit arguing before I buy you 3 more.ā
But when it comes to himself? Yeah he only indulges in suits and Jordanās. Other than that, he has an avengers shirt he had since he was 12 and a pinball machine. Thatās the extent of his possessions. Well that and the watch you got him for his birthday, but shhhhh he canāt let you know he cares ewwwww.
Man is literally the biggest (for lack of better word) Tsundere. Like Top three in anime. Like you got 1.Kageyama 2.Sasuke 3. Him. Like manz would rather die than say he cares. His love language is quality time and gift giving, so heās more show you he loves you, but wonāt say it first. The kinda mf that when you say I love you to them say, āYeah I know, I love me too if only there was someone out there who loved you.ā Like manz is so obvious I wanna kiss him to shut him the fuck up. (I think I have a type.) like bro the me love you tf?
In terms of icks there is one thing I no for fact. This mf wears socks to bed. And not the cute fluffy kind. The musty ass crusty socks he wore all day, then stepped in water, and now you gotta deal with it while yall cuddling. I hate this mf.
On a more serious note, because of his Bonten Bs, he doesnāt have a lot of time for us. So we make time. His time. We just barge in during his meetings, lay across his lap, watch TikTokās, while everyone (him) are just looking like āis this bitch serious!?ā >:|
Anyways, because heās so busy all the time, the majority of what he wants to do when he gets home is just to sprawl out on the couch and just stay there. You can cuddle with him too or whatever he doesnāt mindš. But fair warning, heās the kinda dude who is only ever in the mood for either ww2 documentaryās or like deep sea documentaryās. Like mf has the same movie taste as my dad, I canāt with him. Itās a good day when you can convince him to try something actually entertaining. And you know what he picks? The Fucking exorcist. Heās an asshole. The kinda dude to pretend heās unfazed, but his left leg physically wonāt stop shaking.
speaking of movies, I know I say this every time, but scream Halloween costumes. Yes. Give me Rinny as ghostface please, Iāll freaking sell my soul. Especially if itās not the robe but one of the like dry fit and leather harness- *incomprehensible pterodactyl noises*
anyway back to cuddling, his go to position is literally the Hakari and Kirara thing. Like this mf will always have a hand on your ass. He doesnāt like PDA but this? Yeah you canāt stop him. He is an ass guy, itās just where his hand naturally gravitates.
Tbh I donāt see him having a big wedding. Or any wedding. I think his thing would be just handing you his debit card and saying āpick some shit out. No, donāt worry bout the price Iām rich for a reason.ā And after that yall just elope to some tropical place across the planet for like a month.
speaking of travel itās a pretty common thing for you. Just that itās always last minute. Like bro donāt even give you time to brag to the your friends. Man just pulls up 10 minutes before yāall need to go to the airport and says, āget ready, weāre going to France. How long? Idk a month? Boo hoo bitch. Stay home then. Mhm thatās wtf k thoughtā. Manz is such an ass but you gotta love a walking wallet.
My last thought Iām gonna share is how he physically wonāt use nicnames. Like babe is the physically most he can bring himself to do. Maybe baby. He gives himself the ick every time he thinks of doing anything else
all in all, heās the one who is always there for you, and expects the same. Heās a great guy, under all the stress and yakuza bs. Treat him well, or Iāll treat him betterš¤
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sorry this took me so long to write, Iām working on another request too, and more importantly, my final exams for collage, love that. But even do, if you liked this, please like and request something, and I will definitely be posting. Love yāall so much, Iāll see yall later.
Coming soon~
(if requesting something like this, please limit it to the crew + Shanks and Mihawk cause Your boy aināt caught up or comfortable writing for anyone else)
some headcanons about dating timeskip!Kenma please!!
thank you Anon, I would absolutely love to share some stuff about this beautiful boy~ As always, feel free to send any other requests you got, Iāll be more than happy to share my thoughts~
status: unedited
word count: 1.4k (damn thatās the most Iāve written in a hot minute)
warnings: cursing, pure fluff, mentions of weed, crackfick a little suggestive? Idk man Iām sleepy
wrote this instead of studying for my physics final examš
Ok first off we gotta get the basic facts down. This boy may be sweet as sugar, but heās also one lazy mother fucker. And For the most part, Iād say that he really doesnāt change much from when he was a kid. The most I can say about him, is he definitely is a lot more confident being in front of people, ( I mean thatās kinda his job now, but bear with me) and has become less awkward around people. Very different from when he first met Hinata, he can actually hold a good and relaxed conversation now. Thatās not to say he isnāt introverted anymore, (he definitely still would rather be at home) but he is more confident in himself to be able to actually be able to engage with someone. Is he gonna go out of his way to talk to someone? Hell no, but he can at least handle being approached without overthinking and triggering his anxiety.
This definitely also translates to his relationship with you. You still will have be the one who makes the first move, or at least initiating conversations.
But one things for sure, once he likes you, he loves you. Like wanting to wife you up regardless of gender. And I feel like, (later on in the relationship ofc) if you ever had kids, he would be the best most present dad ever. Like he wouldnāt be a house husband, (his YouTube gig is completely paying for your mortgage) but because the majority of what he does has him, stream for like an hour, go on call for a few minutes, or just edit his videos for a bit, he would be able to make a lot of time for any and all children he has. But thatās way later on in the relationship.
Once heās comfortable in the relationship with you, I can definitely see him involving you in his content. Not like a whole boyfriend and girlfriend couples channel, but like a once a year āreacting to fucked up shit with my girlā type beat.
And since weāre on the subject of content, <<<<<<<<
Like imagine having the most shitty day possible and you come home to your boyfriend streaming COD or some shit. You just face-plant into the bed next to him and he snaps his head towards you.
āshit baby you good?ā he asks as he raises an eyebrow, looking at you concerned as you mumble angrily. He recognizes the nonverbal gestures and just pats his lap with a quick, ācāmere baby,ā and hugs you, letting you muzzle your face into his neck away from the camera, and wrapping a fluffy blanket around you, before he kisses you head and say, āgimme ten more minutes to finish this and weāll order some takeout k?ā. He gives you the most sincere and adorable smile ever sending butterflies not only to you, but all his fans watching, as he smiles and goes back to playing like nothing happened, the chat going wilddddddd. (My gay ass heart go brrrrrr)
I know for a fact that somewhere out there in haikyuu internet, there is a corny ass edit of yāall doing that shit, trust. (I need to keep my slang outta here man š)
ok, getting off the sidetrack, kenma is still like rlly introverted. Like his ideal date is just sitting at home watching some cheesy studio ghibi movie (His favorite is the boy and the heron, fight me on that, itās the hill Iām willing to die on.)
If not some cute Disney movie, I also feel like heād be into like some mystery or like not quite horoscope stuff. Like I feel like he would really be into Wednesday. If he had to watch an actual horror movie, I feel like Iād be like some of the older ones like scream or Nightmare on elm street type shit.
Speaking of scream, I feel like at least once yall would have to do the ghostface couples costume thing. Like I feel like this would just suit him so well. Idk my brains just going feral on it right now. (This was supposed to have a link attached, but it kept fuckin up and Iām to lazy to deal with it so just look it up, the couples version, itās hot af)
aside from the specific stuff that I know people hate reading, the next thing you gotta know about this version of kenma is he is a TEASE. Like not even like an NSFW type tease. Just like a āheās an ass but I love him.ā Like when he was younger I feel like he was too nervous and flustered to point that kinda stuff out. But now? Man is a menace and a half. The type of dude to be like, āI have no idea how your ass fits in those shorts. Oh no, youāre not taken them off now~ā or like the most basic annoying shit like bro fuck off and let me cuddle you in peace without being annoying. Like, heād be like, ā damn someoneās neady today~ you tryna fuck me in front of everyone?ā Like bro stfu Iām just tryna cuddle. Either that or heād call you clingy for returning the affection he initiated. Like bro, quit being a lil bitch and let me be happy you butt muffin.
Man is putting full pussy into annoying you. Heās the type of guy to call you the most vile, disgusting, cringe ass nicknames, specifically to piss you off. You need him to take out the trash? āYes my Pookie Wookie McSmoo Moo bear~ā *gags while writing this* Youāre yelling at him for some stupid thing, āI sorry my sugar booger~.ā
Yeah this part is real OOC, and I was gonna write more but I physically cannot bring myself to do it so anyway, his other 3 favorite things to annoy you by calling you is, Cutesie Poopsie, Shnookums, and side piece #2. (Bro I just gave myself the ick)
Beige flags aside, he does have some green ones . For example, heās a fabulous listener. Like, you just wanna rant and yell about your day? Cāmere babes, he already got fluffy blankets, stuffies, and fluffy socks at the ready. You just wanna cry in piece? Looks like his lap has a vacant spot, he can play games and scratch your head at the same time. #bbgtreatment (regardless of gender. If tumblr has taught me anything itās that nobody is to thug to be bbg, can I get an amen?š )
The more comfortable he is with you, the more he will make jokes, but in the most monotone voice ever. Like you could be ranting to your bestie on the phone like, āI forgot my umbrella at workā¦ yeah Iām soaked,ā and you just hear him from his corner calmly shouting āthatās what she said,ā not even turning away from his game, as if it was natural to him. Itās always so easy to talk with him, unless itās about his problems, but we aināt gon talk about that rn, Iām feeling too fluffy.
There is one thing that I absolutely have to address for this man though. The average female height in my country is 5ā4. And Kenma is only 5ā6. Chances are, heās not gonna be towering over you or nothing. Especially if you a tall specimen like me. (AFAB but gender is a construct yolo on those hoes). So chances are, this mf is for a fact, stealing your clothes. No article of clothing is safe. Hoodie? Sorry boo he got cold streaming. T-shirt? None of his were clean. Miniskirt? Onlyfans- He was pulling a Gojo sorry š
Tbh I donāt see him ever really having a wedding, or really ever getting married. Too much social interaction and attention on him. Gross. The most I can see him doing is, one night while yāall smoking pot or something, being like āyo wanna get married?ā He wants to be with you forever without the government getting involved, but hey, times are tough, and marriage helps with tax returns. So yāall just kinda go to the courthouse, get it done, then fly off to some place to elope.
in all Kenma is just a great loyal guy, who is the biggest pain in your ass, but the biggest cutie patootie this side of the nuthouse.
ummm I donāt write pedophelia, incest, smut or really anything gross. I kinda just write fluff of angst.Iām pretty chill with anything.Thanks for asking. I mostly write for Haikyuu but will comply with other fandoms if you ask :). I try to have ficās done within 3 days, maybe longer if Iām busy. If you Do request please include
1.The character: characters 2. The fandom 3. The main point of it (like a specific characteristic for the reader, or something the characters should do) 4. Romantic or platonic 5. What kind of fic you want (if not stated Iāll just do headcannons)
List of Characters Iāll write for:
Full Teams (platonically)
Hinata
Kageyama
Tsukishima
Yamaguchi
Yachi
Tanaka
Nishinoya
Enoshita
Kiyoko
Daichi
Sugawara
Asahi
Ukai
Takeda
Kenma
Kuroo
Lev
Yaku
Oikawa
Iwazumi
Kunimi
Ushijima
Goshki
Tendou
Semi
Akaashi
Bokuto
Terushima
Aone
Atsumu
Omasu
Sakusa
It's Haikyuu Honey~ @thefourthwifeoftengenuzui - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag
