It's not gay if it's for ghosts

//all the cool kids call me Sparrow// mothras mom//Real dimetrodon hours//she/he/they/whatever makes the joke land

[victusinveritas]

[lakevida]

press the teleport button to come over to my house and eat a bagel on the porch with me rightnow and you will earn 5 gems

[felisgalactus]

Absolutely hilarious decision to make your protagonist a middle school teacher who doesn’t swear btw

[segamascott]

got my first ever official customer complaint because when i was going over the terms of their life insurance they were like "well i don't plan to die" and i was like "well you're going to"

[mellifexfarm]

behold my ugly

[itseasytoremember]

(To the tune of Rasputin): BLEH BLEH DRACULA, KING OF TRANSYLVANIA, HE IS A BAT AND ALSO A MAN

[tiredadventurer]

[phaeton-flier]

Bear religion probably fucking rocks. You're a fucking bear, you're the deadliest thing on earth, once a year an endless supply of salmon just flings itself up the river to gorge on and then you nap for 3 months.

[phaeton-flier]

The most delicious food in the world is protected by tiny demons who can defend it from everyone except you. Your natural armor is thick enough that you can just eat the damn hive while they buzz around you. God's chosen animals right there

[theaudientvoid]

[centrally-unplanned]

Regular bears tell stories of angel bears sent by the Bear God, pure white and twice as strong as any normal bear could be, who rule the summit of the Earth and kill all who stand in their path.

And they are right, those bears exist and totally do that. Humans just have fake angels as a cope.

[theabigailthorn]

love the idea of bears being the chosen species actually. having a near death experience and glimpsing heaven and realising it's just full of bears, no humans at all, humans not ensouled actually, humans an accidental byproduct of God's plan for bears

[abyssaldyke]

It's spring now which means the kids in my city have started drawing hopscotches on the sidewalk and as a rule I do every hopscotch I see because 1. Use it or lose it (ability to scotch) and 2. If a child got down on the hardscrabble streets of Boston Massachusetts to draw a scotch the least I can do is use it, but in doing the hopscotches, I've learned that about 50% of them are the typical 8-10 step scotch and the other 50% are. Somewhat avant-garde. And of course I'm not vetting the entire scotch before I start it so sometimes it's like haha 8 steps woo! Childlike whimsy! And sometimes they're 20 steps or 30 or they've got a section with three squares instead of two where you have to do a little Charleston to step on all three, or, memorably, FORTY one foot squares. A full BLOCK of jumping on one foot but I'm no quitter so once I've started Jigsaw Junior's fuckin hopscotch gauntlet I'm there til the end just a daily pot smoker in her thirties jumping kasa-obake style through an affluent suburb while some little proto-kennedy watches from his bedroom window rubbing his sadistic little third grade hands together and cackling. It's amazing. I love spring.

[ceruleanheaven]

month starting on a monday we have no excuse guys lets get to work and lock the fuck in

[ceruleanheaven]

yk its actually very chic and avant garde to start on tuesday the second

[ceruleanheaven]

many claim theres nothing more subversive and revolutionary than starting on wednesday the third

[noknowshame]

resurrected dead wife watching her own montage: wow I looked so hot in that

[tlirsgender]

I think it's cute when depictions of our solar system include earth's moon. Like yeah sure the moon's invited. We just like her

[tlirsgender]

Like simplified models that don't have Literally Everything just the planets. And our moon #OurMoon

[hellenhighwater]

My brother had lost the right to mock my deeply unwise vending machine purchase because he's spending his weekend driving to Iowa to buy a 1954 Cadillac limousine.

He doesn't have an explanation for this other than the fact that it's cool. And honestly, that's a pretty compelling argument

[hellenhighwater]

Oh good, he's named it.

[hellenhighwater]

He got her and she's gargantuan

[hellenhighwater]

THE BIG is home!!

[hellenhighwater]

Update: brother says: tell your internet people- I’ve been making the car shiny and it is COOL.

He's correct. This is excellent.

[hellenhighwater]

I left my brother unattended he traded the little corvair next to THE BIG for this thing. I think he's building an armada

He is casting spell of car repair on it, I think.

[hellenhighwater]

Brother has been left unattended and has gotten himself a 1970 Cadillac DeVille.

And now it just needs a plate!

Other options are LONNNG and LOMMMG.

it should definitely be

LOMG

LONNNG

LOMMMG

Remaining time: 12 hours 8 minutes

[qcharlie]

please god watch this right now

[fangirltothefullest]

The editing of this video is hysterical and genius- they switch between so many editing styles to reflect exactly what kind of thing they're going for in each segment its GREAT.

[bovineblogger]

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Fuck yeah droving

[painkillerscoffeeandcathair]

I wonder what they're saying to each other?

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Most of it is probably "hey calf! I'm here! We're going somewhere new so don't get lost!" and "Hey mum! Mum! This is confusing and I lost sight of you for three seconds! Tell me where you are!"

[beka-tiddalik]

There's also "argh flies why" just for texture

[bi-accident]

Niche skill check

[dollsahoy]

Slight correction to a lot of the comments--it's not "Baking guy plays piano too," it's "Piano guy bakes too"

Young pianist with a love for yesteryear hits the right notes

Inspired by the entertainers of Bermuda’s “golden age”, composer and pianist Dylan Hollis is hard at work on what he does best — creating mu

I was trying to track down a non-soundcloud version of Chords of Humanity, the song he wrote that when he was 17 was used by Doctors Without Borders, and instead found that it was used in a Fallout New Vegas mod that he may also have made at 17?

The Rockwell Pursuit

A Large Expansive Quest Mod has the courier travelling across Post-Apocalyptic America. To reunite the Rockwell People with their Superstruc

which is a sequel to another mod that's also credited to a Dylan Hollis, which I'm not necessarily assuming is him. Could have been a different Dylan Hollis who happened to have found the song by searching his name--oh, wait, there's a video of game play (with the song as background), and there's a tiny bit of voice acting...yeah, that's him.

[dollsahoy]

More people finding out his Fallout affinity thanks to this shirt

[bedupolker]

It feels cool to be "in" on celebrity gossip before anyone else. I ran into Californian Condor V9 and looked her up on the condor lookup website. It says her current mate is dead and she has no kids but I saw her with a new man AND a juvenile.

[taciturn-nerd]

OP I hope you don't mind but I made a tabloid cover out of this

I used two more condor photos by Andrew Orr and Alam Clampitt from peregrinefund.org

Gotta use the skills I learned from making tabloids out of the Jane Austen novels somewhere right?

Great, now I feel like I'm bird shaming. Congrats V9 on your new family!

[animals-with-fan-art]

This is art to me