A Girl On This Earth

Although marked as my primary account, this is now a side blog to @severalattemptsweremade

[glumshoe]

I pretend to be complex and clever but in reality, nothing has ever made me laugh harder than those bad Chinese subtitles from the bootleg Lord of the Rings DVDs. Tears streaming down my face, core aching, slowly suffocating because I’m laughing too hard.

[absynthe--minded]

also (because one can never have too many of these)

and my personal favorite:

[glumshoe]

I somehow forgot to add my own favorite, which is this one:

I also appreciate the ones that really change the tone and suggest that the characters openly loathe each other…

and this one, which gently encourages self-care:

[steddiely]

listen you guys forgot some important ones

[nosoundinspace]

ya’ll forgot the best one

[mantisanarchy]

I CAN’T BREATHE

[jugex]

this is a treasure that cannot be buried

[mantisanarchy]

Had to reblog again because I spent hours searching for this and I finally found it.

[eltonjohndenver]

DJHSFAJDGHFDJGHFKGHG

[priscellie]

Excuse me, but you are excluding some GEMS:

And the greatest of all:

[ennorx]

Here are some more:

[hondakiku]

Alright everyone!! Here is episode 12 of World☆Stars!! This is the last one for now. I will keep you updated when I find out when the extra episodes will be available to me until then, enjoy!!

[everythingfox]

Bouncy bois

(via)

[prostheticknowledge]

Dildo Generator

Online 3D experiment by Ikaros Kappler which is described as a “Extrusion/Revolution Generator” ….

Created with three.js, you can alter the bezier curves and angle of the form, and is designed with 3D printing in mind (models can be exported and saved, as well as calculated weight in silicone).

Try it out for yourself (if you wish) here

[johnnystompanado-deactivated201]

the time is now

[susaine-mcswiney-deactivated201]

hell yeah

[defibrinationsyndrome]

ah yes, the ol rolling pin dilda

[spiffymuffin]

[caterjunes]

it’s called the purple ramjet

[jolys]

which end do you start with? the answer is yours to decide

[grillmasterxbbq]

shove a vase up your ass

[lord-kitschener]

not even jesus could save yall motherfuckers’ souls

[fan-troll]

i call it the matterhorn

[poultrymancy]

cackling just continues to get louder as I scroll through

[darklightescape]

i think this is the first time an internet community has discovered something customizable and adamantly refused to make penises

[teapotsahoy]

of course this is the post where tumblr is like “Seems sfw to me!”

[furiousfran]

I call this one the Megahorny

Just cram an entire table lamp up there

[ifitaintbaroque]

Me every time this post crosses my dash:

[rosegardenmassacre-deactivated2]

My laugh at this post is auditory evidence of just how sick I still am.

[prettyyinpunk]

Plate. 

[broadwaytheanimatedseries]

I’d usually post this to my NSFW blog but this is making me laugh so unreasonably hard that I can’t fucking breathe and therefore deserves to be on my main blog

[in3ffable-husbands-deactivated2]

Compiling some of the best ones from the replies-

[annoyed-almond-milk-deactivated]

jfc w h a t

[catchymemes]

[topshotpicks]

[youthoughtiwasasleepdidntyou]

I feel these in my soul

[decepticonsensual]

TurboTax Sucks Ass

Hasan Minhaj has created an actually free website for doing your taxes online, and it includes both a gallery naming and shaming corporate tax avoiders, and THIS little gem - an ASMR video.  About taxes.  That definitely falls into the category of “things that are unfeasibly hot for some goddamn reason”.

10/10

[kyraneko]

It is literally named TurboTaxSucksAss.com and that is the best thing I’ve seen all day.

[ladyshinga]

THE LOGO IS A BUTT WITH A STRAW IN IT

[babyanimalgifs]

Hilarious Cat Snapchats That Will Leave You With The Biggest Smile. 

Follow @animalsnaps​ for more

(via: boredpanda)

[blackness-by-your-side]

The sign of high quality is the fact the book was banned by the government. Trash literature NEVER EVER had any troubles with the law.

[cuntybearjamboree]

FARENHEIT 451 IS ON THE BANNED BOOKS LIST??? IT’S LITERALLY ABOUT THE SOCIETAL DANGERS OF BANNING/OUTLAWING/BURNING BOOKS ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

[dancing-coyote]

That’s the reason it’s on the bloody list.

BECAUSE IT’S ABOUT HOW BANNING AND BURNING BOOKS IS WRONG.

[unlimitedgamesbutnogames]

HERE’S ALL THE PDF VERSIONS I COULD FIND SINCE WE’RE ALL IN QUARANTINE AND WE CAN’T PHYSICALLY GET THE BOOKS WE DON’T HAVE

The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn

The Autobiography of Malcolm X

Beloved

Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee (this was the only free version I could find, and it’s a downloadable thing, so do so with caution)

The Call of the Wild

Catch-22 (it was either this version or one where the entire thing was in comic sans font)

The Catcher in the Rye

Fahrenheit 451

For Whom the Bell Tolls

Gone With the Wind

The Grapes of Wrath

The Great Gatsby

Howl

In Cold Blood

Invisible Man

The Jungle (personally I don’t like this formatting, but the site doesn’t look sketchy so…) - there’s also this which is the proper book format in a pdf, but it’s directly photocopied so it might be hard to read some of the print

Leaves of Grass

Moby Dick

Native Son

Our Bodies, Ourselves (we learned about this one in APUSH!)

The Red Badge of Courage

The Scarlet Letter

COULD NOT FIND Sexual Behavior in the Human Male (the ebook is 47 fucking dollars??? and i can’t even find sketchy websites that’ll let me download a pdf. if anyone manages to find a link, lmk please)

Stranger in a Strange Land

A Streetcar Named Desire

Their Eyes Were Watching God

To Kill a Mockingbird

Uncle Tom’s Cabin

Where the Wild Things Are (this is a slideshow!!!! how fun)

COULD NOT FIND The Words of Cesar Chavez (however I did manage to download the first 71 pages of the book from EBSCO and I put it here but I couldn’t get the rest. sorry y’all)

[readingishellalit]

!!!!!!

[cav-core]

I still want to know what The Great Gatsby did to get banned.

[strengthins0lidarity]

If a book is banned, there’s a good chance it’s important.

[followsthesparks]

do not ignore this

our momentum is slowing down. we can’t let our dashes go back to normal when the world is not normal. so, if you are reading this, you are ~legally~ obligated to choose 2 numbers below; you must complete the task of those two numbers today. don’t pretend you didn’t see this. either do them right now or set a reminder to get it done before the sun goes down. the timer starts now. choose two. 

sign some petitions. LINK HERE. if change.org hasn’t accused you of being a bot yet, you haven’t signed enough. 

watch these youtube videos. LINK HERE. do not skip the ads. this is a way to help raise money without having to donate any.

sign up to get daily actions. LINK HERE. after filling out the form, you will receive texts Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays telling you what action to take. 

text or call for any of these victims. LINK HERE. this website is extremely helpful, well organized, and practically does all of the work for you.

donate some money. LINK HERE. if you have any more money to spare, please donate it to one of these funds.

follow every single one of these organizations on social media: blcklivesmatter, colorofchange, reclaimtheblock, showingupforracialjustice, and civilrightsorg

post these important sources to your social media. LINK HERE. you have no idea who it might help. 

read this article and forward it to at least one person. LINK HERE. 

watch this video explaining the racial wealth gap. LINK HERE. it’s really informative and only about 15 minutes long. 

do some reading. LINK HERE. this link has a ton of great resources to educate yourself. read at least one. 

[a-fucking-velociraptor]

Cool Tip

If you are like me and always need to be working on something to keep your anxiety under control, during this quarentine why not helping scientists by looking at pictures of some neat penguins? or even galaxies?  There’s this site call Zooniverse, where you can help on scientific projects by analyzing pictures and data!  Right now my favorite project has returned, called Penguin Watch (where yeah, you get to watch penguins, it’s amazing)

you basically have to analyse photos looking for penguins, their chicks, eggs or even predators and human interaction But there are lots of interesting projects you can help in areas such as biology, physics, history or even art: 

Oh and the best part, some institutions even accept it as volunteering/service hour requirements for graduation and scholarships!! It’s helping me a lot during this time, so I thought it was worth sharing 

[decodering]

Redditors design worst volume sliders possible

Some of these are genius! ( see reddit / via )

[decodering]

Well, this post went a bit nuts.

[xxxtictacion]

That last one honestly belongs in hell

[official-lucifers-child]

ALL OF THESE HAVE ME WHEEZING AND CACKLING SO MUCH

[ha-nice-joke]

All found in the comments but not found in master post, you’re welcome :).

[shametheshadow]

WHO GOT CAUGHT!?

[thetrashiestoftrash]

I love that the highlight is on playing Flight Rising when everything else on this list is objectively funnier

[iliveinmyblanket]

I’m Hamilton tickets

[vinyaya-jay]

As someone who goes to that college....Go Blue y’all lol

[aswiftfooted]

Monty Python’s Life of Brian (1979).

[ayellowbirds]

The story goes that John Cleese used to teach Latin, and drew upon that experience for this scene—leading to many of his former students howling with laughter in theaters.

On another note, i want to see this scene redone with other fandoms.

[solarbird]

this is every Latin teacher ever including mine

[fozmeadows]

I love this scene with my whole heart forever and also the locative is a fucking BULLSHIT case that exists for literally TWO WORDS, WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK

[ampervadasz]

Unmute !

[je-blauge]

Oh, so that’s what sexual magnetism is

[ruffboi-mags]

Here’s the full version on his youtube: HOLY SHIT???

[shadowdragonia]

I actually prefer the clip if only because of how it starts you off. You go from “This is silly” to “Okay this guy can actually dance” to “Wait, WHAT THE FUCK!”

[korusalka]

Electro Swing = Leg Precision. For Arm Precision, please check out frequent waacking champion Ibuki (on the left). Waacking is like the West Coast cousin of Voguing.

[niuniente]

CAT by  By 九米 / Zhaobangni (1631123)

[youthfulstudents]

Peek - a ..... BYAKUGAN!!!!!!