a were seagull doing were seagull stuff

this is my old blog that I didn't know even existed anymore. my other blog @wermoewe was deleted (for whatever reason) still an ageless werebeing with an alter ego that's 18+

[wermoewe-the-first]

Side blog? Never heard of her! Get blasted with a plethora of random posts that the meerkats operating my brain seem reblog worthy!

[ina-gartens-weave]

why haven’t I seen anyone posting about that giant fucking baby penguin in Melbourne that’s bigger than some of the adults already

[ina-gartens-weave]

his name is Pesto <3

[ina-gartens-weave]

this bastard weighs 46 lbs at 9 months old. he’s 22 lbs heavier than his PARENTS

[aichu-dechu]

[somewhatstacey]

OMG I SAW THIS LAD IN PERSON AND LOST EVERY OUNCE OF SHIT I’VE EVER POSSESSED

Look at him!

Also he was separated with one of his parents when I saw him but obviously wanted to Be Where The People Penguins Are so they’d set him up with a little rock stool so he could gaze upon his brethren:

Which enabled me to capture the single funniest video I’ve ever taken of anything in my life:

All hail Pesto! The king of chonk!

[disneyflopera]

He's adventurous, cheeky, sings to the caretakers who clean his enclosure and has been seen CANOODLING with a penguin named Pudding.

[asexxxualauthor]

And fucking handsome too—look at him striking a pose with his new look!

[the-haiku-bot]

And fucking handsome

too—look at him striking a

pose with his new look!

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[curlicuecal]

Y'all omg, look at him in his awkward teen phase

[lycions]

x

[instant-oatmeal]

[ryan-sometimes]

Some names just sound so ridiculously fake that had they been fictional, people would’ve rolled their eyes in complete disbelief. Like seriously. Wdym there’s a mf called Galileo Galilei. Stfu. You just made that up

[ryan-sometimes]

Fastest man on earth is a guy called Usain Bolt. Sure I guess. There’s a poker player whose real name is Chris Moneymaker. Whatever. Scott Speed is a racecar driver. Founder of Tito’s Vodka is some guy called Bert Beveridge. There’s a former CNN bureau chief called William Headline. You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.

[david-de-bergerac]

[silversoulstardust]

let's put this one here as well

[somecunttookmyurl]

[weirdnessdk]

I fucking love it when people are OBVIOUSLY born to do that exact job! 🤣🤣🤣

[mightyoctopus]

[ID: Andrew Drinkwater, water research center. Dr Dick Chopp, urologist. Tweet by @JimMFelton “Do you have any other urologists I could talk to?” PC Rob Banks, Avon & Somerset Police. Lieutenant Les McBurney, Sun Prairie Fire Department. /end ID]

[cryoverkiltmilk]

US Army Staff Sergeant Max Fightmaster.

[foldingfittedsheets]

[mymidwestheart]

Well, that made me happy. 😌🎠❄️

[rainbowbarnacle]

[prokopetz]

Flavours of unreliable narrator:

Lying to the reader

Lying to themselves

Simply misinformed

Not paying attention

Has weird priorities

Assumed you knew

Hates you personally

Bad at communicating

Easily sidetracked

Will believe anything

Has weird prejudices

Just kind of dumb

[byjove]

he doesn’t know you can see his poop

[tainbocuailnge]

forget everything anyone has ever told you on the matter the truest marker of adulthood is starting to hear the siren call of high quality kitchenware

[tainbocuailnge]

to be clear you SHOULD buy that cast iron pan and you SHOULD buy that knife set and you SHOULD buy that fancy rice cooker and you SHOULD buy that novelty mug. high quality kitchenware is always worth it you’re literally gonna be using that almost every day

[nudityandnerdery]

This seems like a good post to include this link on:

Your Cookware Got Worse On Purpose

One buyout firm quietly collected Pyrex, Corelle, Instant Pot, and Oneida. Farberware is a name on a 200-year lease. And the pans still wort

Talking about popular kitchenware companies undergoing enshittification, and gives you a list of brands towards the end that are more reliable.

[normystical]

wedding dresses are white specifically so that if the bride goes axe-crazy you can rest assured you will see the blood stains all over her and it'll be sick as fuck

[wizardarchetypes]

it’s sooo funny when rude customers encounter employees who can deny them service for the first time.

i was working at a little cafe where I could deny service over bad behavior, harassment etc. & mask mandates had just ended a week before & already people were being weird about me still wearing mine—an N95, the kind shaped kinda like a duckbill.

so this man walked in, looked at me sooo scathingly, laughed at me, and said “damn. never known a woman to choose…practicality over looks.”

And I just said, “oh. you can go, you’re not getting a drink.” And he said, “what???”

I said, “sir, you just walked in at 6 am & called women impractical and me ugly in one sentence.”

And he was so astonished he didn’t even argue he just turned around and left 💀🙏🏻 it was like he suddenly became self aware

[carolinalaurel]

One summer I was running ferry rides across a lake so people could see the waterfalls without walking 6 miles when a guy snapped my bra strap as he was boarding the boat. So i immediately threw him off, he started yelling for my manager, my boss cheerfully informed him that, yeah, she’s the captain of the boat and she can kick off anyone she wants. He goes to storm off, looks expectantly at his girlfriend, and she just goes, “Well, I’M not walking six miles, Michael! I’ll meet you back at the car!” and sits right back down!!!!

The expression on his face when he was told that he couldn’t get on the boat, then immediately told that his girlfriend was ditching him? PRICELESS. he just blinked at her and then stormed off like a child. I gave her a free hat and was like maybe rethink this relationship…….

[hickeywiththegoodhair]

i once had this fucker come up to order a beer. while i pour it he shows me the wanky fucking chemical structure tattoo on his arm and he’s like “hey. you know what this is” i was like “nah sorry” (never cared abt chemistry in school, plus having to look at a some rando’s pretentious tattoo gives me the douche chills). he decides to respond with “heh. you must not read many books”

i immediately stop pouring his beer. i reply: “heh. you must not want this beer.” thirsty boy immediately starts groveling like a worm “please please no i do want the beer im sorry im sorry” believe me when i say it was one of the most pathetic things ive ever witnessed

[lezbadeez]

gotta love people immediately backpedaling when they realise that there are Consequences To Being Mean

[lastvalyrian]

I genuinely believe that part of why it has become so normalized to be openly callous and evil in politics is that customer service culture has trained affluent people that they can treat everyone they consider beneath them however they want and still be treated kindly.

[hazard-symbols-that-fuck-hard]

[asmeesh]

NGC 7380 // Wizard Nebula

2.5hrs exposure

[binturong-of-the-day]

The binturong of marine biology

[teaboot]

why would you post radfem talking points and then claim to be anti terf

Terfs and Radfems are slightly different, they just have a lot of overlap

"The patriarchy has a negative impact on men in a way that fosters a hostile environmen for women", "the patriarchy is bad for all genders", and "men as human beings are not fundamentally different from women" are not contradictory statements

I'm anti terf AND anti radfem

Can we not just be decent to each other

[enki2]

[notallmensheviks]

legendary scamming right here