WhateverForever2313

°·°·°

[jordisstigander]

Reaper Chp. 3

Chp. 1, Chp. 2

I fought to keep my eyes on the road instead of the thing in the rearview mirror as the speedometer ticked higher, higher. Even so, I still caught glimpses of it out of the corner of my eye: some polymorphic shape, flowing in and out of itself.

It was gaining on us.

As it got closer, I started to notice individual features. Teeth, a wing. A face, or…not faces? But every time I thought I saw something distinguishing in what I now thought had to be more than one creature, I quickly lost track of it in the swirling cloud.

Aesa continued to fire at the swarm, and it seemed to ripple with the impacts. It didn’t slow down.

Suddenly, Aesa jumped on the hood of the car. I swerved in shock, nearly spinning out of control, but Aesa remained firmly planted where he crouched. His dark eyes locked with mine.

“Whatever happens, keep driving,” he ordered. Then he turned to face the road, coat swirling around him. He reached out, hands clawed as though he was trying to tear the air apart. The air began to shimmer and warp as he strained, the muscles on the back of his neck standing out.

The swarm was getting closer, and individual members of the group were breaking off, getting closer, closer.

Then Aesa screamed.

Energy pulsed through my being, and I saw reality rip in front of me. I had no time to react, and the next thing I knew, we were hurtling through.

I could feel the pressure around me once again, but this time it was neither soft nor gentle. It pulled  at me: my hair, my skin, my eyes, dragging me backwards like a rubber band. Then the pressure snapped, and we were through to the other side.

This place did not look anything like the fields and mountains of the landscape of the inbetween I had seen before. The terrain was warped, rocky, and violet-grey, the sky a strange olive green. I jerked the wheel to avoid twisted outcroppings and instinctively hit the brakes.

“Keep going!” Aesa yelled, “We have to draw them in!” And so I gasped a prayer and stomped on the gas as my tiny vehicle rocketed through the alien landscape.

We gained a little breathing room as the swarm was forced to fight their way through the hole Aesa had ripped for us, but they quickly burst through. Before, we’d had the advantage of a straight, clear highway; now we were slowed as I desperately swerved through the uneven terrain of the other place.

And now, I could hear them. They muttered and shrieked almost words, echos of hunger and hatred and an ancient fear. However, Aesa didn’t fire on them even as they neared, crouching in wait on the trunk. Finally, he reached out again, and the hole he had made in reality began to shimmer and knit itself back together.

Distracted by the sight, I was forced to jerk the wheel to the side, barely avoiding a large rock which suddenly loomed before us, sending us between the walls of a canyon. Horrified, I realized that the canyon appeared to empty out into nothingness.

“Aesa!” I screamed. He turned, sprinting to the front of the car.

“Just keep going!” He told me.

The swarm was right behind us now. Gas pedal pressed to the floor, I stared helplessly as we speed towards the edge of the cliff. Tires kicked up violet dust and pebbles before spinning uselessly as we hurtled over the edge. For a moment, all I saw was the olive sky. As we began to fall, I saw a deep abyss beneath us, sparkling with neon flame. I closed my eyes, the screams of the swarm enveloping me.

A moment later the pressure embraced me again, and by the time I opened my eyes we were flung back into the world. Gravity shifted, and instead of falling nose first, we crashed wheels down into the middle of a field of wheat, deploying my airbags as dirt spraying around us and we skidded to a stop.

Aesa flung up his arms to seal the hole, but the swarm was already forcing its way through. Three managed to squeeze their way through before the final cracks glistened and disappeared, severing another as they did.

Aesa drew his weapon and fired off three shots in quick succession, the final stray exploding into a grey mist beside my window.

I clung to the steering wheel and breathed as the wheat shivered and stilled. Everything fell silent. Aesa sighed, slumped his shoulders, and fell off the back of my car. I threw open my car door and tried to run to him, but my legs gave out. I fell to my knees and vomited.

On the ground beside me, the last remnants of the thing bubbled away into nothingness.

Breathing heavily, I crawled over to where Aesa lay, crumpled. He seemed almost ethereal, more a shadow than a man. I reached out a trembling hand to touch him.

“No,” he whispered, “no help, not safe, just, rest, a minute, please.”

I drew back and let myself sink into the crushed wheat, moving only to try to spit the foulness out my mouth.

Finally, Aesa stirred. When he spoke, I could barely hear his voice.

“We need, get back, people. Safer.” I dragged my eyes to his face. He wore a thousand-yard stare. “If, I can’t, another. Need others.” He began to drag himself back to the car, and I followed suit. I shoved the airbags out of the way and strapped myself into the seat.

I reached for the steering wheel and then stopped, trembling.

“What was that thing?”

Aesa didn’t look at me.

“I’ll tell what I can later. Rest now. Please.”

I looked at him sitting there, barely present, as though he might fracture at lightest touch. I pushed away my fear and made myself go numb.

I pulled out onto the highway, speeding away from unspoken terrors and a field of crumpled wheat.

[jordisstigander]

Reaper: Chapter Two

His hand was warm.

Isa pulled me to my feet. “Just a second,” he said, scanning the area.

I didn’t feel dead. I could feel the wind on my skin and my heart hammering in my chest. My hands were trembling with adrenaline. That had to be a good sign.

“Kat,” Isa said, startling me. I had been staring at my hands so intently that I hadn’t noticed he was holding out his hand to me again.

“I’m not dead,” I informed him a bit giddily, taking his hand again.

Isa didn’t smile, but the corners of his eyes crinkled. “This way,” he said, pointing with his free hand. I looked, but he seemed to be pointing towards thin air.

He led me away from the broken highway and my silver car, wading through the faded brown grass. After about twenty yards he stopped and turned to me.

“I need you to think of a place,” he said, “Any place.”

My mind went blank. “Any place?”

“Anywhere. Visualize it in your mind. Got it?” I hesitated before nodding. “Good. Now we’re going to take one more step together.”

I looked at the grass before us. It didn’t look any different from any other patch of grass we’d passed. I drew a deep breath.

“Okay.”

“And go.”

As we stepped forward together, the air went…soft. Like a deep, thick mattress. Like holding an overripe peach in your hands and slowly pressing in your thumbs, letting them sink into it. Not hot or cold or anything like that. Just soft.

Less than a moment passed before the softness was gone; I didn’t even have time to blink. We were still standing in the grass by the highway. I could see my car close by and the mountains looming in the distance. But the edges of the mountains were vague and unclear, and the light that filtered through the clouds was tinted red, almost as though it was shining through rose-colored glass. More telling was the quiet. The wind had disappeared, and the grass was silent and still.

“You know,” Isa commented, “I think people usually choose somewhere other than the place they’re currently standing.”

“I panicked,” I responded, taking in everything around me, “Which seems to be my basic state of existence at this point.”

Unlike everything else, Isa seemed more real than ever. The basics were still the same: pale, ashy skin stretched tight over his body, white hair, and jet black eyes set deep in their sockets. His fingers and limbs were overly long for his body, and he was wearing a black hooded coat with loose sleeves, grey pants, boots, and a t-shirt with a vintage ad for spam.

However, his skin lacked the translucent quality it usually had, and his shadow -

“You have a shadow,” I blurted out, “You have a - the grass. You’re actually crushing down the grass.” I knelt down and confirmed for myself that yes, the grass could be pressed down, and then I turned around and thrust out my hand. The softness was waiting just feet behind me. “Where are we?”

“This is an inbetween place,” he replied, watching as I shuffled a few feet to the side and stuck out my hand again, “We needed somewhere safe to talk.”

I pulled my hand from the softness and tried again. “And the deserted highway wasn’t cutting it?”

Isa pressed his lips together. “It’s not humans that I’m worried about overhearing us.”

I paused mid thrust. “Oh.” The fear which had almost been forgotten in my wonder flared up.

“Here,” Isa said, and he took my hand again, leading me around whatever invisible portal we had passed through. Almost mindlessly I walked towards the car.

“Are we safe here, then?”

He shrugged. “Should be. I don’t think I was followed - there’s no good reason anyone would, really, I’m not a major player. But it’s not wise to talk about these things in the open on principle.”

We reached the car, and I stretched out my hand to touch it. It was solid under my fingers, but the numbers on the license plate were scrambled, changing every time I blinked. 

Isa stopped me as I went to open the driver’s side door.

"I just wanted to see if it would start,” I said.

Isa shook his head. “It might, but it’s not wise to go through any doors here. There’s no telling where you might end up.”

A little disappointed, I perched on the trunk instead, pulling up my legs and wrapping my arms around them. Isa stood before me, hands shoved in his pockets.

“So…” I started, Isa looking at me expectantly, “Are you an angel?”

Isa burst out laughing. It was an odd sound, out of place in the unnatural silence of the inbetween.

“No, and I wouldn’t let an angel hear you say that if I were you. Actually, it would probably be fine; most angels I’ve met are quite nice. But trust me, if you ever meet an angel, you’ll know it. People tend to fall over when they show up.”

“Okay, not an angel.” There went half the theories I’d ever read. “Then what are you? And don’t say a reaper.”

“I never really liked that name anyway,” he replied. He kicked the ground for a moment, thinking. “I’m the guardian of your soul. I’ve been with you since your soul first joined your body. I will ensure no one touches it until your life is complete.”

“…And when my life is complete?”

“I take your soul,” he answered nonchalantly, “ - Kat?”

I rolled off the car, running into the field, running towards the softness.

Maybe he wasn’t an angel after all. But there were other theories about the reapers.

“Kat?” he called after me, “I’m not taking your soul here and now.”

I stumbled to a stop in a panic. The grass all looked the same. Whatever gateway we’d walked through wasn’t marked by any kind of visual cue. I was effectively trapped.

“Maybe you’re not taking it now,” I said as I turned, arms tight by my sides, hands clenched, “but you’re going to.”

Isa walked towards me slowly, “That probably wasn’t the best way for me to phrase that.” I shrank away from him instinctively, and he sighed. “This would be easier if I was an angel. They’re good at explaining things. Can I try again?”

He waited until I nodded hesitantly.

“I’m the guardian of your soul. I was bound to you the moment your soul entered your body. While you live, I’ll protect your soul from harm. When your days are complete, I’ll carry your soul to its rest. I’m not going to kill you, consume your soul, drain your life force, steal your corporeal form,  keep you in a tortured disembodied state devoid of all sensation, or anything else of that kind.”

I stared at him. “That’s…really specific.”

“But you’re not running this time,” Isa noted.

“If you’re lying, I’m screwed anyway,” I retorted.

“Ah.” Isa’s body seemed to droop ever so slightly. “I liked it better when you just trusted me.”

“And I liked it better when I wasn’t afraid I was going crazy,” I snapped. I shut my eyes and paused, willing myself to breath deeply. “I’m tired. I’m stressed and exhausted and I have no clue what’s going on. You disappeared for two weeks and I didn’t even know reapers could do that, and now you’re talking and you touched me and I’m somehow not dead and we’re in a freaking alternate dimension or something and it’s just a bit much.”

“I didn’t intend to let things get this out of hand,” Isa admitted, “I only thought I’d be gone for a few hours at most.”

Finally, the question that had been burning in my chest for weeks. “What happened? Why did you leave?”

“There was a reaper who needed help. He and his human were being targeted, and they weren’t going to make it.”

“Are they okay?”

His face brightened a bit. “They are. The woman died and he was able to deliver her soul safely.”

“Your definition of a happy ending and mine are a little different,” I muttered, “What did they need protection from?”

Isa looked grim. “There are many beings who would want to misuse a human soul,” he said softly, “And there are others who would like nothing more than to see a reaper give into the temptation to take advantage of their charge. Some of these were attacking this reaper in the hope of either claiming the soul for themselves or, if nothing else, forcing the reaper into a position where he drew on the soul for power. I thought they’d back off once I came to his aid, but they fought until the end.”

Behind Isa’s shoulder, I saw something like a dark smudge on the horizon where the mountains met the sky. A horrible sense of wrongness settled in my gut.

“I didn’t mean to leave you for so long,” he continued, “And it shouldn’t -”

“Isa,” I interrupted, pointing urgently, “There’s something here.”

Isa turned to look. The smudge was getting larger. “No,” he said, “No no no no!” He grabbed my hand.

“We need to move now!” He took off across the field, dragging me behind him. We passed through the softness and the world shifted, the rosy light turning grey. We sprinted back to my car.

I looked back towards the mountains. I couldn’t see anything.

“Get in the car,” Isa ordered, and I hurried to do so. After buckling myself in, I looked up to see Isa pull out a gun.

“Drive home as fast as you can,” he said, ignoring my shock, “And don’t stop until I say so.” With that, he swung himself onto the roof of my car.

I turned on the car and made a U-turn, pressing the pedal to the floor. A minute later gun shots rang out, and I looked into the mirror to see something burst through the portal and hurtle down the broken highway in pursuit.

[writing-prompt-s]

Everyone has a reaper. The further away it is, the longer you have left to live. Every day it inches a little bit closer, but it is always there. Except yours, which disappeared three weeks ago

[jordisstigander]

I pulled over to the side of the highway, legs aching from sitting so long. I was in the middle of nowhere, and I’d driven hours to get here.

I steeled myself and turned off the car.

Everyone’s born with one. A reaper. People say nobody’s reaper looks the same, like everyone’s personal terrifying snowflake of death. No one knows for certain, though, because you can only see your own reaper. 

Very little is actually known about them. It’s hard to study something you can never touch.

The car door slammed shut more loudly than I’d intended. Now that the engine was off, the only other sounds were the wind softly trickling through the brown grass and the soles of my sneakers on the pavement.

For miles around me, there was only grassland, flat, empty. I turned, round and round, searching.

And saw nothing.

When you’re born, your reaper is far away. From that moment, it starts to move closer. Sometimes it’s slow, not even an inch over years. Sometimes you look up, and it’s standing face to face with you.

The things you do can affect how quickly it moves. My grandfather confessed that his reaper started moving faster the day he first smoked a cigarette. Drunks report getting behind the wheel of their cars only to see their reaper sitting beside them.

They say you never touch your reaper until the day you die.

My reaper disappeared about three weeks ago.

I’m not sure exactly when it happened. It isn’t close enough to always be in the same room with me, and it isn’t like I’m constantly checking to see how close it is.

But I usually do catch glimpses of it in the hallways of my office, lingering near the doorway while I wait in line at the coffee shop, watching as I get in my car in the morning. And one day, I just…didn’t.

It was gone.

It. When did I start calling it “It?” Not it, him. He. My reaper’s not an it. He.

Was it my parents or a teacher who first told me to stop calling him a him? Don’t personify it. Don’t give death that kind of power in your life. Your reaper is not a person. Your reaper does not have a gender. Your reaper does not have a name.

When did I start listening to them? When did I lose his name?

I spent the first few days in denial. I just wasn’t looking in the right places, I told myself. Just because I didn’t see it (him) didn’t mean it was gone.

But I didn’t see it (him him him) anywhere. Not in the grocery store parking lot, not in the stairs of my apartment building, not in the long dusty stacks of the library.

So I turned to the internet. 

Reaper Disappeared

My reaper is gone

I can’t see my reaper

What does it mean if I can’t find my reaper

I found all sorts of articles and forums on reapers. People freaking out because their reaper was moving faster, people trying to figure out why their reaper was farther away, people arguing over what it meant if their reaper’s appearance changed.

No one claimed their reaper had suddenly just disappeared.

Reapers aren’t people.

My mother was firm.

Reapers don’t have names.

She told me over and over until I learned to stop talking about it.

Until I started to doubt what I had heard.

Reapers never talk.

But that didn’t mean I forgot.

There wasn’t anyone I could talk to. How would I even start? What did this even mean if he was gone?

Had I discovered the cure for death? Was I going to live forever?

Or was I simply going to have to walk through life not knowing when death would come for me?

One way or another, I had to be certain he was gone.

I got into my car and started driving.

I couldn’t see anything but brown grass and broken concrete.

Maybe if I could just see a little bit farther, I thought as I scrambled on top of my car. I perched on top of it uncertainly, scanning the horizon for any sign.

I started to scream.

Where are you and Why are you doing this and Please, I can’t take this and I don’t understand, please.

Please.

I don’t want to live forever.

I don’t want to watch everyone die.

I don’t want to be alone.

Please, don’t let me be alone.

I whimpered the last ones into my knees, curled up on the ground beside my car, then whispered the name I heard him say so many years ago.

“Isa, please.”

After a few minutes I calmed myself, swallowing deep breaths of air. I unfolded my body and went to stand up.

Isa was standing over me.

“Sorry about that,” he said as I recoiled, falling back against the car.

“You’re talking,” I stated dumbly.

“Well, yes. That shouldn’t come as a total surprise. We have spoken before.”

“You said one word to me when I was a kid,” I replied indignantly, fear turning to anger, “And my mom sent me to a child psychologist because I kept insisting you talked. And where have you been? Reapers aren’t just supposed to disappear!”

He shrugged. “There was something I had to take care of, sorry.” He smiled a bit ruefully. That was something else reapers weren’t supposed to do, and it must have shown in my face.

He crouched down beside me, ignoring how I flinched backwards.

“Look, there are some things we need to discuss.” He held out his hand, “Let’s go somewhere we can talk.”

I stared at his hand. “Look, I know I don’t want to live forever and all, but…that doesn’t mean I want to die right now or anything.”

“You’re not going to die,” Isa said, mouth twitching upwards, “Not for a good while, not if I can help it. Most of what you think you know about us is wrong, okay?”

“So you’re saying I shouldn’t be afraid of you?” I hedged.

He shook his head. “No, that’s not what I meant at all. But you can trust me.”

“That’s…not very comforting,” I muttered. He waited, patiently, hand outstretched.

“Ah, what the hell,” I said, and I took Isa’s hand.

[imnotsomefloozy]

taylorswift we need a recipe for these please! 🍪🍪🍪

[taylorswift]

MMMKAY— there are two ways you can go about this. The quick and easy way is to make sugar cookies from a sugar cookie mix and just cut open a packet of chai tea and pour it into the batter as you make it. Cause you’re busy and you want making cookies to be a chill part of your day. Pow. Done.

OR

If you want to make the cookies from scratch (that’s what I did for the 1989 Secret Sessions), you can use this recipe I found on a baking blog I like, joythebaker.com and I believe it was originally from a book called The Pastry Queen. If you want another great baking blog, I get a lot of great ideas from smittenkitchen.com too. This is a recipe for basic insanely good sugar cookies. I added the chai element to the recipe because I thought it would infuse cozy holiday vibez into the cookie and it really did. So I’ll star the part that I added in the recipe.

http://joythebaker.com/2009/06/giant-vanilla-sugar-cookies/

***after you add the egg and vanilla, cut one chai tea packet open and empty the crushed up tea leaves into the batter CAUSE CHAI COOKIES ARE ABOUT TO HAPPEN UP IN HERE***

I made an icing for the cookies, but they’re fine on their own. If you want to make icing for them, just mix 1 cup powdered sugar with 1/4 T-spoon of nutmeg, 1/4 T-spoon of cinnamon and 3 TAYblespoons <—-(I’m so annoying, it astounds me sometimes) of milk or eggnog if you can find it this time of year. The more milk/eggnog you add, the more your icing will become a glaze. But glazes are legit too so basically just LIVE YOUR LIFE.

I lightly sprinkled cinnamon over the icing once the cookies were baked and iced, but there are so many icing options you can pair with these cookies—I mean it’s out of control. If you’re really feeling like living on the edge, you can go ahead and add a few drops of food coloring to the icing to make it festive. No one is going to stop you.

Why?

Cause the bakers gonna bake bake bake bake bake.

Bye.

[aurevoir-mes-amis-deactivated20]

did taylor swift really just show up out of the blue on tumblr only to drop some betty crocker shit on us what the fuck

[wlw-mess]

I’m reblogging this solely bc Taylor Fucking Swift just wrote a whole thing about cookies and ended it with a reference to her song.

I have so much respect for her right now.

[whateverforever2313]

Realigning cuz it's swiftmas and everyone needs ro remember this exists

[celiastjqmes]

taylor swift lockscreens

like or reblog if you save them

[whateverforever2313]

These are

Gorgeous

[whateverforever2313]

Favorite Lyrics From folklore

the 1 ~ You know greatest films of all times were never made

cardigan ~ you drew stars around my scars but now I’m bleedin’

the last great american dynasty ~ I had a marvelous time ruining everything

exile (feat. Bon Iver) ~ Second, third, and hundredth chances Balancin’ on breaking branches Those eyes add insult to injury

my tears ricochet ~ And I can go anywhere I want Anywhere I want, just not home And you can aim for my heart, go for blood But you would still miss me in your bones And I still talk to you When I’m screaming at the sky And when you can’t sleep at night You hear my stolen lullabies

mirrorball ~ Hush, I know they said the end is near But I’m still on my tallest tiptoes Spinning in my highest heels, love

seven ~ Please picture me in the weeds Before I learned civility I used to scream ferociously Anytime I wanted

august ~ So much for summer love and saying “us” ‘Cause you weren’t mine to lose

this is me trying ~ They told me all of my fears were mental So I got wasted like all my potential And my words shoot to kill when I’m mad I have a lot of regrets about that

illicit affairs ~ And you know damn well For you I would ruin myself A million little times

invisible string ~ Cold was the steel of my axe to grind For the boys who broke my heart Now I send their babies presents

mad woman ~ And you’ll poke that bear ‘til her claws come out And you’ll find something to wrap your noose around

epiphany ~ Something med school did not cover Someone’s daughter, someone’s mother Holds your hands through plastic now “Doc I think she’s crashing out” And some things you just can’t speak about

betty ~ Will it patch your broken wings? I’m only seventeen, I don’t know anything But I know I miss you

peace ~ Sit with you in the trenches Give you my wild, give you a child Give you the silence that only comes when two people understand each other

hoax ~ My only one My kingdom come undone My broken drum You have beaten my heard Don’t want no other shade of blue but you No other sadness in the world would do

the lakes ~ we’ll find out when I hear it

This album has everything I love about Taylor’s voice and songwriting. It is so beautifully done, the songs tying together in a complex web of golden thread. There are lyrics tying cardigan to betty, betty to august, my tears ricochet to hoax, all of it. It is a true masterpiece.

Honorable Mentions ~ 

Peter Losing Wendy

Bad was the blood of the song in the cab on your first trip to LA

Every single word in my tears ricochet

Hell was the journey but it brought me heaven

Pouring my heart out to a stranger but I didn’t pour the whiskey

Don’t call me kid, don’t call me baby Look at this godforsaken mess that you made me

At least I’m trying

“fuck you forever” 

Will you tell me to go fuck myself or lead me to your garden

I gave so many signs

Tell yourself you can always stop what started in beautiful rooms ends with meetings in parking lots

Fifty years is a long time Holiday House sat quietly on that beach free of women with madness, their men and bad habits and then it was bought by me

Every line of hoax

Every single time Taylor swears

Every line of epiphany

All the lyrics. They’re just so amazingly written.

[whateverforever2313]

After some contemplation, I have decided that my favorite lyrics from the lakes is

I want to watch wisteria grow right over my bare feet 'Cause I haven't moved in years And I want you right here

[whatapunderfullife]

what if when Taylor said "I was so ahead of the curve, the curve became a sphere / fell behind all my classmates and I ended up here" she was talking about how she was quick to achieve her goals (a multi-tim grammy winner before they would have graduated college) but now all of her classmates have settled down and had families and in Miss Americana she talks about how she can't just have children or get married without planning things out 2 years in advance but how she clearly wants them (paper rings and the line "give you a child" in peace)

[whatapunderfullife]

everyone is saying taylor left her comfort zone for folklore

but I counter this, with the fact that on every album there is one song that would fit perfectly in folklore

taylor didn't leave her comfort zone

she left the expectations of her as a pop artist behind

she left the pop music industry's comfort zone

[weltonboys]

the folklore album makes me want to wander the forest in search of a lost lover, turning myself in circles and getting tripped up in the fog, getting lost in the trees, getting lost for love

[whateverforever2313]

Glad I'm not the only one

[whateverforever2313]

Favorite Lyrics From folklore

the 1 ~ You know greatest films of all times were never made

cardigan ~ you drew stars around my scars but now I’m bleedin’

the last great american dynasty ~ I had a marvelous time ruining everything

exile (feat. Bon Iver) ~ Second, third, and hundredth chances Balancin’ on breaking branches Those eyes add insult to injury

my tears ricochet ~ And I can go anywhere I want Anywhere I want, just not home And you can aim for my heart, go for blood But you would still miss me in your bones And I still talk to you When I’m screaming at the sky And when you can’t sleep at night You hear my stolen lullabies

mirrorball ~ Hush, I know they said the end is near But I’m still on my tallest tiptoes Spinning in my highest heels, love

seven ~ Please picture me in the weeds Before I learned civility I used to scream ferociously Anytime I wanted

august ~ So much for summer love and saying “us” ‘Cause you weren’t mine to lose

this is me trying ~ They told me all of my fears were mental So I got wasted like all my potential And my words shoot to kill when I’m mad I have a lot of regrets about that

illicit affairs ~ And you know damn well For you I would ruin myself A million little times

invisible string ~ Cold was the steel of my axe to grind For the boys who broke my heart Now I send their babies presents

mad woman ~ And you’ll poke that bear ‘til her claws come out And you’ll find something to wrap your noose around

epiphany ~ Something med school did not cover Someone’s daughter, someone’s mother Holds your hands through plastic now “Doc I think she’s crashing out” And some things you just can’t speak about

betty ~ Will it patch your broken wings? I’m only seventeen, I don’t know anything But I know I miss you

peace ~ Sit with you in the trenches Give you my wild, give you a child Give you the silence that only comes when two people understand each other

hoax ~ My only one My kingdom come undone My broken drum You have beaten my heard Don’t want no other shade of blue but you No other sadness in the world would do

the lakes ~ we’ll find out when I hear it

This album has everything I love about Taylor’s voice and songwriting. It is so beautifully done, the songs tying together in a complex web of golden thread. There are lyrics tying cardigan to betty, betty to august, my tears ricochet to hoax, all of it. It is a true masterpiece.

Honorable Mentions ~ 

Peter Losing Wendy

Bad was the blood of the song in the cab on your first trip to LA

Every single word in my tears ricochet

Hell was the journey but it brought me heaven

Pouring my heart out to a stranger but I didn’t pour the whiskey

Don't call me kid, don't call me baby Look at this godforsaken mess that you made me

At least I’m trying

“fuck you forever” 

Will you tell me to go fuck myself or lead me to your garden

I gave so many signs

Tell yourself you can always stop what started in beautiful rooms ends with meetings in parking lots

Fifty years is a long time Holiday House sat quietly on that beach free of women with madness, their men and bad habits and then it was bought by me

Every line of hoax

Every single time Taylor swears

Every line of epiphany

All the lyrics. They're just so amazingly written.

[bone-cement-huffer]

memeception

[hashtagloveloses]

WE’VE HIT TERMINAL MEME

[bl00dlikeice]

@caesarianconfection

[fidefortitude-deactivated202011]

I’ve said “I hate this” so many times on this website, and never actually meant it, because “I hate this” is just shorthand for ‘this is an example of a meme given a twist I wasn’t expecting with intent to surprise’. Which is, in of itself, a meme on this site. God damn it.

But this… This is something else.

The rapidity of a meme’s introduction to its zenith to its decline is so rapid that in ten years, you’ll need a damn twenty-page manual to explain this. It’ll be as unfunny and hard to explain as jokes in Shakespeare plays, except even more inexplicable because fuck, at least Shakespeare’s jokes are usually about anal or fucking your mother, good wholesome sex jokes we can all get behind.

For the love of fuck, how do you explain loss.jpg? How do you explain gun?

[mommacomms]

….I THOUGHT THIS WAS A YMCA REFERENCE

[pagesofkenna]

it is a YMCA reference - that’s one of the 6 memes being represented here

ok let me see if i can break this down easily. YMCA is the easiest place to start - the song itself has become a meme over time with people changing the lyrics to reference other pop cultural events. so YMCA is meme one (1)

this first lyric replacement (”take the breadsticks and run”) is a reference to the tumblr meme ‘stuffing breadsticks into my purse’. i think everyone remembers that one so i wont bother to explain it. that’s meme two (2)

“man door hand hook car door” is a meme of its own, a creepypasta from i dont remember when. it was a terrible stupid retelling of the generic ‘stuck in a car while hook handed man tries to kill us’ story so the stupid title caught on for memorability. that in and of itself is meme three (3)

‘gun’ is… yeah i dont know how to explain gun. long story short you add gun to the end of a phrase instead of what you expect the last word to be. its shock funny. its everywhere but its popular to add to “man door hand hook car door” for.. some reason? gun is meme four (4)

and the thing is, this four meme combo is something thats gone around before. meme combos are, itself, a meme. which means taking this meme combo and mixing in another meme actually becomes meme five (5)

which leaves us at loss.jpg. loss.jpg was a terrible bad comic supposed to be about some tragic event, but it was presented so poorly literally no one takes it seriously, and for some reason recreating the four-panel setup has become popular. so thats meme six (6)

(but i need to add that this is the greatest version of loss.jpg i think i’ve ever seen. the initial ‘young man’ lines up with the guy bursting through the door, and the shock meme ‘gun’ matches the shock scene of the woman in the hospital and idk if OP even thought about that but it makes this just so much better)

[animatedamerican]

I wasn’t going to reblog this, but @pagesofkenna‘s comprehensive meme-by-meme annotation is a thing of beauty and should be shared.

[captainlordauditor]

average tumblr post contains one meme, this post, which contains six, is an outlier and should not be counted

[japhers]

it might also just be a coincidence due to loss.jpg’s format but the whole white minimalist four-panel setup is also suspiciously reminiscent of those early 2000’s rage comics

[maps-and-elvis-and-zelda-n-shit]

I was getting a political compass vibe too

[your-uncle-dave]

tag urself im man door hand hook car gun

[politicalcompassmemes]

This works better than I thought it would.

[chiribomb-deactivated20220820]

This was in my senior project

[kait-the-kitty]

I’m not sorry.

[panickedmartian]

EIGHT MEME COMBO

[smooththegoofyshark]

FATALITY

[soda-soda-pop-deactivated202005]

We have officially created a new language 

[soda-soda-pop-deactivated202005]

I just had to do it to em

[phoneykin]

THIS FUCKING THREAD I’M GONNA CRY

I LOST IT AND MAN DOOR HAND HOOK CAR GUN AND DIDN’T EXPECT MORE I’M SOBBING

[soda-soda-pop-deactivated202005]

M E M E T E N

[soda-soda-pop-deactivated202005]

OwO?

[garecc]

[your-one-true-prince]

W o w

[screamingveryslowly]

You know I had to

[bone-cement-huffer]

I hope you know this is the most cursed addition to my post, and I love it

[joyriding-in-the-fandoms]

THIRTEEN!?

[junepop45]

SOMEONE EDIT THIS FROM THE ORIGINAL PHOTO SAYING “this one does not spark joy” TO THIS VERSION SAYING “this one sparks joy”

[astral-ghoul-deactivated2025100]

[moved-to-ancient-gaylienz]

well i added my contribution : )

why—

[fandersunite]

IM SCREAMING

[robynspreciousnest]

This is the most elaborate meme I have ever seen and damn am I concerned by how it makes sense.

[operahousebookworm]

“You’re in your 30s, but you still understand all this meme stuff?” “Oh yeah, sure.” “Can you explain it to me?” “I absolutely fucking cannot.”

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

finally made that patreon page ya’ll been on about

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

that’s fair. i did make a real one though

[daughter-of-the-sea-and-stars]

I will throw you into the dashcon ball pit.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

lol sorry, couldn’t resist. real link is one of these three:  link 1  link 2  link 3

[snows-buttered-scone]

hint: it’s the third one

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

i hope some student out there somewhere, for some reason, has at some point plagiarized my blog for an assignment 

[dragonisprime]

Worse. I cited you.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

I would like to hear the story

[dragonisprime]

I was writing an essay on internet culture and began discussing internet humor. I wrote this.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

that’s not absurdism that’s ART

[cool-guy-1000]

They called you Gaud in an ESSAY

[dragonisprime]

I called them Gaud in a formal essay and still got an 83%.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

reblog to get a 83% 

[whateverforever2313]

This is what I aspire to

[charlemane]

i’m still PISSED about harry potter leaving draco to die because “oh boo hoo there aren’t enough seats in this minivan someone has to stay behind” like you fool. you fucking fool. i’ve ridden to walmart and back in an 11-person shuttle seating 17 people just bc i didn’t wanna wait to get some skim milk. are you really telling me that you couldn’t put a dude in the trunk for the sake of getting away from a collapsing island? you worried about not having enough seat belts??? people died bc of your poor minivan management skills, harry

[charlemane]

i drafted this in a blind rage immediately upon waking up today and i may have misremembered some plot points of the Harry Potter series

[hypokeimena]

#THERE 👏🏻 WAS 👏🏻 ROOM 👏🏻 FOR 👏🏻 DRACO 👏🏻 IN 👏🏻 THE 👏🏻 MINIVAN (via @dracomalfoyofficial)

[jacketslutjayse]

Bfhcjgjfhfbf

[ubernoona]

Whatever version of hp you’ve been reading, i would like a copy

[kombatkraze-blog]

This is one of my favorite posts on this hellsite and I love seeing it every time.

[whateverforever2313]

Ok, hear me out. They make a spin-off series of Anne With An E, same actors, picking up on the same plot, on a different network with a different title. Anne With An E is her childhood, and the new series is her adulthood. Just a thought.

[preferredfanart]

If we can’t have a focus on Anne for whatever reason, I want to see a spin-off focused on Bash and his family with everyone else making timely reappearances. 😊 

[whateverforever2313]

This would also be awesome

[whateverforever2313]

Ok, hear me out. They make a spin-off series of Anne With An E, same actors, picking up on the same plot, on a different network with a different title. Anne With An E is her childhood, and the new series is her adulthood. Just a thought.

[whateverforever2313]

Favorite Lyrics From Manic

Ashley~ Apart from my beating heart Its a muscle, but it’s still not strong enough to carry the Weight of the choices I’ve made

clementine~ I left my daydreams at the gate because I just can’t take ‘em too Know my heart still has a suitcase, but I still can’t take it through

Graveyard~ It’s gettin’ real You lock the door, you’re drunk at the steering wheel And I can’t conceal

You should be sad~ I’m just glad I made it out without breaking down And then ran so fucking far That you would never ever touch me again

Forever... (is a long time)~ ‘Cause I could never hold a perfect thing and not demolish it What am I thinking? What does this mean? How could somebody ever love me?

Dominic’s Interlude~ And if you’re lookin’ for signs then, you should know There’s power in the words you’re thinkin’

I HATE EVERYBODY~ And really, I could fall in love with anybody who don’t want me So I just keep sayin’ I hate everybody

3am~ Know that my identity’s always getting the best of me I’m the worst of my enemies And I don’t really know what to do with me

Without Me~ And then I got you off your knees Put you right back on your feet Just so you could take advantage of me

Finally // beautiful stranger~ I’ve never seen a mouth that I would kill to kiss And I’m terrified, but I can’t resist

Alanis’ Interlude~ ‘Cause he is she is her And her and he are love

killing boys~ And I won’t ever feel this way again ‘Cause you don’t need me anymore

SUGA’s Interlude~ I wonder what’s in store If I don’t love it anymore

More~ Wanna scream, but what’s the use?

Still Learning~ I know that I’ve done some wrong But I’m tryna make it right

929~ And I remember the names of every single kid I’ve met But I forget half the people who I’ve gotten in bed And I’ve stared at the sky in Milwaukee And hoped that my father would finally call me

This album is just completely amazing, and raw, and... well... manic. I love the whole thing. If you haven’t listened to it yet, I strongly recommend it. Low-key disappointed Nightmare wasn’t included.