homestuck au where everything is the same except all the beta kids were raised as siblings by johns dad because jade didnt deserve to be alone, rose didnt deserve to be ignored and dave didnt deserve to get his ass beat on a regular basis. bro is in jail
they get in the game and find out theyre actually two sets of legitimate siblings and instead of being like āwhy were these two people were not related two raised as our siblingsā (because dad is clearly johnās bio father) john and jade are just like. āawwww WE wanna be related to dave and rose too. this isnt fairā
they meet the alpha kids and rose turns to the derse kids and is like āim rose. i think im your daughter? this is my brother dave, my brother john, and my sister jade. what are your namesā and dirk actually literally has a fucking stroke
john and jade have lived together their ENTIRE lives as siblings even though theyre technically second cousins? but dave and rose came later. john and dave had been internet friends and one year when theyre in like fifth grade dave comes to visit and when dad sees all these fuckin bruises all over him hes like āwhat the FUCKā and when dave goes āoh yeah bro and i were fighting. hes training me for something i guess its no big deal rly. the swords are p badassā dad is like JOHNā¦.JADEā¦ā¦SLEEPING BAGS ARE DOWNSTAIRS and later when daves supposed to go back home john and jade go with him and dads like āim taking your kid because youre incompetent and a monsterā and bros like āfair.ā and then they call the police on him
roses mom and johns dad were dating for a while like two years later and they were all INTIMATELY aware of the fact that she had no idea whatsoever about how to take care of a kid. one day she was like āhey can you babysit rosey for a few hours i gotta do somethingā and dad went āyeahā and then mom like. never picked up rose. she just kind of skipped town. so dads here with his two Actual children plus johns internet friend whos brother beat him up and this goth eleven-year-old with a negligent mom and hes just. āguess i need a bigger carā
oh also john and jade are on the meteor during the game. thats a thing. the trolls are all like ā???????moirails?????ā but thats just kind of how the kids have always acted with each other and they see zero reason to stop now. theyd always been super close for siblings (rose thinks its because theyre all roughly the same age) but for some reason they never grew apart like some kids do and just. stayed really close. they love each other dammit
john and jade legitimately do forget that they arent really related to dave and rose btw. like they straight up are like āremember when this thing happened when we were fiveā and dave is like āi didnt live with you until i was like 9 dudeā and john and jade are like āwhat reallyā
also like. since jade was raised around people (including john) theyre both EXTREMELY touchy and even though theyd NEVER say it out loud dave and rose are extremely hungry for like. healthy physical contact that didnt involve fighting ESPECIALLY dave so they have movie nights and shit and they all fall asleep in one big pile??? jadeās got her arms around rose whoās holding hands with john whose legs are tangled up with dave whoās got his face in jadeās hair and despite the logistical speed bumps its literally the most comfortable any of them have ever been as some dumb movie plays on the television and they dream
johnās a prep jadeās a jock daveās a nerd and roseās a goth. they all go to public school and have no friends aside from each other for almost two years because since the strilondes dont look like theyre related to the harleyberts people assume that john/rose and jade/ dave are couples and therefore Do Not Interact
one day jades like āblah blah blah my brother daveā and whoever shes talking to is likeā¦..ādave strider? i thought he was your boyfriendā and jade says without skipping a beat āhis name is dave egbert and no offense but i would actually rather dieā
dave and rose have simultaneous identity crises in sixth grade. āoh jesus oh fuck were not legitimate harleybert siblings what if john and jade dont think were validā so they sneak out one night to the 24-hour drugstore, pool their allowances to buy enough black hair dye to make rapunzel a goth, and spend two hours together silently destroying their hair as they soak it in cheap dye long enough to literally make it black almost permanently. john gets up to get a glass of water at 2 am and opens the bathroom door to see dave wearing a shower cap and rose frantically scrubbing off the dye stains on the sink and walks right back out again. jade wakes up the next morning and sees two dark-haired people she doesnt recognize asleep next to her and almost has a fucking heart attack
I almost didnāt like this because my angst brain was like ātoo happyā and then the hair dye to feel like they fit in? Love it.
good post op
