Whot?!

Cae / 20 / Queer / They/Them Sideblog @thestoriesweremember AO3 @CassandraFeather

[radiolightning]

In case anyone is having a bad night:

Here is the fudgiest brownie in a mug recipe I’ve found

Here are some fun sites

Here is a master post of Adventure Time episodes and comics

Here is a master post of movies including Disney and Studio Ghibli

Here is a master post of other master posts to TV shows and movies

*tucks you in with fuzzy blanket* *pats your head*

You’ll be okay, friend <3

[meanwolfs-remade-deactivated201]

i will reblog this everytime it shows up because any of my followers could have a bad night right now

[becausewhatiam-iswhatimnot]

All these links, besides the first, are broken. So here’s some more.

Here’s an emergency compliment

Here you can play 2048

Here’s a playlist of Bob ross

Here’s a website to watch movie’s and shows for free

Here’s a website to watch documentaries for free

Here you can to nothing for two minutes

Here you can break something. It’s good for anger

Here’s a button to press to make everything okay

Here’s a site to cut something up (TRIGGER WARNING)

Here’s a site that makes you a website depending on a song you choose

Here’s a gay comic. It’s adorable

Here you can spend Bill Gate’s money

Here you can draw your own island

Here you can learn about patterns website’s use

Here you can get your life stats

Here you can listen to the Tucker Zone (Headphones needed)

Here you can see how fast you’re moving

Here you can see the progress of time

Here you can see the future of the universe 

[becausewhatiam-iswhatimnot]

Want some more? 

Here’s the butterfly project

Here’s a snickerdoodle mug cake

Here’s a link to some free audiobooks

Here’s something to read when you feel like a burden

Here’s a secret

Here’s my playlist of some sea shanties 

Here’s another secret

Here’s a link to some cool websites 

Here’s a blog that gives you recipes for when you’re low on spoons

Here’s some Brony Headcanon’s

[becausewhatiam-iswhatimnot]

Some more? I’ve got plenty

Here’s 100,000 stars

Here you can control the weather (TW FLASHING IMAGES)

Here you can weave silk

Here you can make a castle of your own

Here you can make a kaleidoscope drawing

Here you can explore recursion

Here you can play a jelly block game

[becausewhatiam-iswhatimnot]

I’m back with some more! 

Here you can draw with pasta

Here you can draw logo’s from memory

Here you can play this is sand, here you draw cool sand designs

Here you can play The Organ Trail

Here’s a customizable white noise website

Here you can simulate gravity

Here you can create your own guardian of the galaxy

Here you can make your own galaxy

Here’s a website you can get some support at.

[becausewhatiam-iswhatimnot]

to find later

[addiewho]

Here you can split circles into smaller and smaller pieces (I found this really satisfying)

Here you can have images of people point to where your pointer is

Here you can paint someone’s nails

Here you can grow a garden across your screen (Audio included)

Here you can try out all kinds of mind illusions (Trigger Warning: Flashing Lights)

Here you can see how many miles you have scrolled

Here you can watch a website load forever, although you might be getting enough of this on Tumblr mobile

Here’s a rickroll

Here you can remind yourself that you’re awesome.

Here you can throw trash into a dustbin only for it to bounce right back out (Audio included)

Here you can make sand dunes using sand (Audio included)

And here you can generate more cool websites like these

[boy-in-the-stars]

pinning thissss

[fiddlepickdouglas]

And yet more!!!

Here you can listen to a gentle rainstorm

Here you can make snowflakes

Here is a Line Rider feature film with relaxing music

Here is the entire script to the Princess Bride (many don’t need it but it’s fun to read anyway)

Here is an abbreviated script for the entirety of Book 1 of A:TLA that I made out of anger at the film that definitely doesn’t exist

Here is a playlist of the top 10 most relaxing songs ranked according to science

Here’s a site where you can make a dude beatbox with fun animations

[nyxsomnia7]

I’m fully aware I will need this at some point.

[littlesistersti-backupandspam]

Doc of all working links from above for anybody on desktop

Working links from that insanely long thread

21 Aug 2013 Here is the fudgiest brownie in a mug recipe I’ve found 10 Jan 2021 The tv one is Tubi which is limited but it’s great for old c

[bananabytez]

@test-tubetango

[anexperimentallife]

[massiveharmonytiger]

It's not "autistic people do not understand hierarchies" as in we don't know what they are or how they work. It's "autistic people do not understand hierarchies" as in hierarchies are arbitrary, ever shifting and are based on perceptions and opinions of whether someone has value, not on whether someone actually has value (which we all do, by virtue of being human beings). So why would people place so much value on something like this? We just don't get why so many people would function this way. It isn't our default way of thinking.

[the-sunshine-cult-deactivated20]

Different person, but, I've seen some people who are older in the community claiming that kink and polyamory have historically been considered part of the community. I don't know enough about the history there, do you know anything on that? I've been on the "no" side with those two, but I mean, I don't really know anything that would go against those historical claims, so do you know if are they true?

I don’t know any history surrounding that but kinks and poly are not LGBT+. They deviate from social norms, certainly, but they’re adjectives, not subjects.

okay idk if that made sense im not an english major guys

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

Okay so I’ve made about a dozen of these posts in the last month or two, so I’m not going to get as exhaustive as I sometimes do, but here’s the history that my mother and aunties taught me about kink and polyamory as queer.

When I was growing up, I was told that the kink community was the physical space in which the queer community existed and that non-monogamy/polyamory as the concepts that exist today were born directly out of queer culture and the environments that shaped it.

Basically, back in the early years when most of queer culture was an arrestable offense and people mostly only got to meet their partners in the backrooms of old speakeasies and nightclubs, kink spaces were doing the same thing and were one of the only non-mob owned options for gatherings. Kink communities themselves were almost entirely made up of queer folks already anyways because surprise surprise a community made mostly of abuse survivors is gonna have pretty high rates of queer folks in it. And because of the semi-public nature of the spaces and the limited safe dating options polyamory and related non-monogamous practices became common place.

They became so common place in fact that queerness and queer culture completely and foundationally shaped the discussions around consent, relationship needs, emotional connections, and ethical behavior that became central to kink and polyamory as practices. They became so common place in part because it made sense, in part because the cultures all needed each other, and in part because, as my mother always said, “if society had already damned you just for being queer, what did you have to lose by trying all the other things society was going to damn you for as well?” This, incidentally, is also why there have historically been such high numbers of queer folk in illegal occupations like sex work and why my mom and aunties also used to consider sex work as a culture pretty fucking queer too.

But the years went by and your average, “respectable” white gay and lesbian folks with their picket fence day dreams started making progress. They started kicking people to the curb in an effort to make queerness look less “challenging” and different. Bye bye, bisexuals, bye bye drag and trans culture, bye bye non-monogamy what do you mean you actually think the “slippery slope” to gay marriage also leading to polygamy might be a good thing? Bye bye all you sex freaks, sexuality is something your born with and you can’t help who you love, it’s not like all that disgusting talking-about-sex-and-building-the-entire-network-of-sex-ed-information-we-used-to-desperately-try-and-survive-the-AIDS-crisis-ew-you-perverts-our-sex-is-beautiful-and-pure-like-marriage! And so on and so forth.

See, when it was all about survival, the distinction that Straight people drew between gay, kinky, polyamorous, trans, ace, etc was irrelevant. They’d kill us all the same so we might as well band together and make a world in which the next generation might not just live but thrive. But once it became about gaining access to state acceptance and making room within the legal framework that already existed, those of us who were too scary to Straight society, who still needed the hierarchy destroyed, not just expanded, became dead weight. Our labor, our physical space, our intellectual efforts all became irrelevant and all that mattered was when the Straights looked at White Cis Gays they saw Us instead. So the White Cis Gays fixed that by making it clear they thought we were just as disgusting as the Straights thought we were. They abandoned us and took our history and our language and our fucking lives with them and said we weren’t ~allowed~ to have it. And because those of us who were marginalized in many ways or who were doubly or triply damned were more likely to have suffered massive losses during the AIDS crisis and to still be living in poverty, in crime, and in general destitution of social capital, we’ve been fighting an uphill battle not to be erased ever since.

So now you have a whole generation or two or three who grew up being told a sanitized history where a “drag queen” threw the first brick at Stonewall, Pride wasn’t started by one of the bisexual Queens of Kink, and non-monogamy hasn’t been the natural progression of so many of our communities for generations. And they tell us we never existed, we’re just secret straighties thinking our gross sex lives make us queer, we could just choose to be respectable and “normal” like everyone else and then we wouldn’t be “bullied” (because god forbid our actual oppression be recognized) and they completely miss the irony.

And as much as I hate that I have to list my credentials in order for there to be a chance in burning hell for this response to be considered legitimate, I am the nonbinary, bisexual, polyamorous, kinky, intersex child of a bisexual, kinky, polyamorous woman who spent all of my life and most of hers in the heart of Queer culture and politics to the point that she put me on the stand in front of the entire school board and a third of the state at age 10 to fight for our right to participate in the Day of Silence without fear of suspension, expulsion, abuse, or injury/death. I was on my mother’s hip at the state capitol protests with police in riot gear ready to do whatever it took to prevent us from entering the building. I am Queer in so many ways, including ones no one can dare fucking argue and so was my mother before me and my aunties before her, and this is THEIR history I am telling and will keep telling until I’m dead because I will rot before I let people erase their memories, blood, and joy from our history by claiming that kink and polyamory don’t belong.

I apologize for that all sounding angry and upset. It is not aimed at anyone in particular. I am just very very tired and it’s almost Passover which means that my auntie’s are a lot more on my brain than usual and I am just so exhausted by the way I have been mocked and belittled for months now over things that were simply Truth when I was growing up. Please understand how much history is denied and how many ancestors are dishonored by this rhetoric of “who REALLY belongs in the community?”

We were not supposed to be an exclusive club with a guard at the gate. We were supposed to be a role model by which society learned to better itself and treat us ALL with dignity and humanity. And I am tired of seeing people pretend otherwise.

[whovianuncle]

We were not supposed to be an exclusive club with a guard at the gate. We were supposed to be a role model by which society learned to better itself and treat us ALL with dignity and humanity. And I am tired of seeing people pretend otherwise.

[jenroses]

When I met my “First queer person ™” back in 1990, one of the things she said to me that I spent about 27 years unpacking was this:

“monogamous heterosexual relationships are patriarchal bullshit.”

I took offense at the time. But when you don’t let people use words like “queer” to describe “everyone who isn’t in this Normative Bubble of heterosexual serial monogamy”, you have to get pretty specific about the fact that STRAIGHT refers to this concept of being “normal” which in this culture has meant for many years “Straight, cis, monogamous (or doing your best to fake all of the above)” 

Quit fucking gatekeeping.

The people who hate us hate all of us. Joining them in their hatred doesn’t solve the problem. 

The way they win is if they get us to fight each other. 

[grace-and-ace]

I don’t reblog sensitive topics on this blog, but this is exactly what I had a long conversation about recently. I’m not young, and I remember shit like this as it was happening. polyamory is queer as fuck and learn to respect that

[penrosesun]

Relatedly, also – the legal fights for legal polyamory and kink are fundamentally tied to the legal fights for gay and trans rights.

Here’s something that doesn’t get talked about nearly enough: even today, most states have anti-kink laws on the books, and will sometimes prosecute consenting kink participants for assault and battery. And in places where this happens, it is pretty much exclusively used to target queer clubs and spaces, in almost exactly the same way that anti-sodomy laws once were.

When I was in undergrad, a queer nightclub near where I went to school got busted because someone was reportedly “hitting a patron with a wooden spoon”. The people arrested were charged with assault with a dangerous weapon – the alleged ‘weapon’ being the spoon – a felony punishable by up to 5 years in state prison and $1,000 fine. Turns out, there wasn’t any play happening in the club at that hour, and there were no wooden spoons found anywhere in the building… but you better believe that the proud queers the cops arrested for it had to find lawyers and make bail and go to court dates anyway. And even if the cops had found a fucking spoon in the club, would that have justified any of it? Make no mistake – this club, like so many other queer kinky clubs across the country, was targeted because it was queer. And separating out the queer from the kinky would do jack shit to help anyone arrested that night.

Anti-kink (and anti-poly) are weaponized in order to target queer people, specifically, and in significant numbers. And as far as I’m concerned, that’s enough to make them inherently anti-queer as political tactics, even laying aside all of the history above. Don’t do our enemy’s dirty work for them.

[moki-dokie]

god fucking thank you for thoroughly explaining this. i’m so exhausted by this argument and so exhausted explaining these points to people.

i am once again begging the baby gays to LEARN YOUR QUEER HISTORY

[bemusedlybespectacled]

just on the flip side of this, since this is also an issue: the kink community tends to forget that its roots are very firmly rooted in queer culture, particularly gay male culture. leather subculture, which most mainstream kink copies to some degree, was very specifically a butch gay male thing (formed out of the cross-pollination of post-WWII military guys, bikers, and gay men). high protocol dynamics? collaring? flagging? the aesthetic of wearing leather clothing or harnesses, or using leather equipment like floggers and handcuffs? the sheer concept of using “topping” and “bottoming” as term at all? that’s all fucking gay, dudes!

and incidentally this is why I get pissed off at heterosexual kinksters who like to act that their dynamic is The Truest Expression of Dominance and Submission because the man is the dom and the woman is the sub and that’s the only true/traditional dynamic. my dudes, the “traditional” kink relationship was a Tom of Finland comic.

[polyamorousmood]

Being polyam is FR like "I'm not aro/ace but I believe in their beliefs"

[polyamorousmood]

Posted this an hour ago and already got the tags peer-reviewed twice so here they are in the main post for all to see: #sexual stuff doesn't make/break/define a relationship #People can be meaningful to you in a variety of ways and these are all valuable #The nuclear family is a false ideal #I could go on

[not-scared-of-microwaves]

Meanwhile being aro/ace is legit like "i'm not polyam but i believe in their beliefs"

[tchaikovsgay]

my step mom was asking me more questions about the nonbinary thing and after talking to me for a bit, she said "oh, so youre a rosé! not a chardonnay transitioning to a merlot, just your own unique type" which was such a middle aged white woman way to frame it, but i cannot lie gang. it did make me want to cry

[mikkeneko]

[vacskamativagyok]

This is the funniest thing on the internets today, don't you hide it in the tags

[pacificseaotter]

genuinely think everyone would benefit from learning about aromanticism and relationship anarchy. even straight, allosexual, alloromantics. because amatonormativity affects everyone, and learning about relationship anarchy and redefining how you think about relationships is so freeing. youcan do whatever you want 4ever.

[allthingswhumpyandangsty]

reblog if fanfic writing has been a source of happiness for you and has helped with your mental health

[bruno-has-definitely-deactivate]

[chilewithcarnage]

[atomicniire]

You can not untangle alt culture and being queer

[gothiccharmschool]

Louder for the people in the back:

YOU CAN NOT UNTANGLE ALT CULTURE AND BEING QUEER

[whotwentwrong]

As your friendly neighborhood English lit major I wanted to point out what Hu Tao seems to be referring to when she tells Xiao “you’ll be wandering lonely as a cloud in no time!” Because, since this is a poetry event, I don’t think it would be a stretch to say that it’s a reference to the well-known poem “I Wandered Lonely as a Cloud” by William Wordsworth, which is pretty interesting—

Let me add the poem in question here:

I wandered lonely as a cloud

That floats on high o'er vales and hills,

When all at once I saw a crowd,

A host, of golden daffodils;

Beside the lake, beneath the trees,

Fluttering and dancing in the breeze.

Continuous as the stars that shine

And twinkle on the milky way,

They stretched in never-ending line

Along the margin of a bay:

Ten thousand saw I at a glance,

Tossing their heads in sprightly dance.

The waves beside them danced; but they

Out-did the sparkling waves in glee:

A poet could not but be gay,

In such a jocund company:

I gazed—and gazed—but little thought

What wealth the show to me had brought:

For oft, when on my couch I lie

In vacant or in pensive mood,

They flash upon that inward eye

Which is the bliss of solitude;

And then my heart with pleasure fills,

And dances with the daffodils.

This could be a super interesting poem to look at in relation to Xiao, now that the English version of Hu Tao’s line has brought it up, especially with how the poem mentions “dancing in the breeze” (line 6) and “[my heart] dances with the daffodils” (line 24) and how that may relate to the text in the description of Xiao’s namecard:

[whotwentwrong]

So I was watching the new Gen V episode (spoilers btw) and something that struck me was how Jordan switched right before they kissed Marie.

It got me thinking on why they did it and then I thought of their powers— one form always takes the hits/energy, while the other expels energy/produces hits of their own.

Maybe Jordan changed forms (subconsciously) because they thought they were going to take an emotional hit, bracing themself for rejection? Might be reading too much into this though.

[whotwentwrong]

Friend of mine also elaborated on this, pointing out that in the conversation with their parents Jordan’s masc form took the hits whereas they fought back in their fem form

[whotwentwrong]

So I was watching the new Gen V episode (spoilers btw) and something that struck me was how Jordan switched right before they kissed Marie.

It got me thinking on why they did it and then I thought of their powers— one form always takes the hits/energy, while the other expels energy/produces hits of their own.

Maybe Jordan changed forms (subconsciously) because they thought they were going to take an emotional hit, bracing themself for rejection? Might be reading too much into this though.

[bog-girl-blog-deactivated202310]

I think there’s something to be said about the healing process of growing up Superwholock( save the vague/assumed rep in DW) , getting queerbaited your entire life and then being an adult and getting to watch shows like Our Flag Means Death, What We Do in the Shadows and Good Omens all explicitly portray queer characters that are the MAIN characters and display healthy and diverse narratives that you can see yourself in. I swear if 10 year old closeted me could see myself now, an openly queer female filmmaker with actual pieces of media to reflect on in a healthier manner, she’d be feeling alright.

[judescai]

“you’ve changed” i change my personality depending on the book im reading

[deadmomjokes]

It recently came up in conversation with my toddler that some birds can talk, and this has caused her great concern.

See, we were talking about how movies are pretend and how in real life, animals don’t talk. I mentioned that there are some birds who talk a little bit, but not like the animals in movies, and she just looked at me like “???”

So I informed her that some kinds of parrots can copy sounds that people make, and can learn how to say words. I thought this would give her a giggle, as fun new facts often do, but she was just deeply perplexed and a little worried about this.

“Birds can talk?” “Do they ask questions?” “What do they say?” Why do they talk?” “Do chickens talk?” “What about Blue Jays?” “Why do some birds talk?” “How do they talk?” “Birds TALK???”

We showed her a video of a parrot doing the “Hello, pretty bird, give a kiss” thing, and she was dead silent the whole time, hugging her comfort pillow with her knees to her chest. We asked if she wanted us to turn it off, and she shook her head. But we also asked if she wanted to see another one, and she shook her head even harder.

I don’t know why it has distressed her so greatly to learn that some birds can mimic human speech; but then again, I don’t know why it doesn’t distress the rest of us more to know that some birds can mimic human speech.

I keep thinking about that post that’s like “The first person to hear a parrot talk was probably Not Okay.” Because that’s exactly what happened. She had never been introduced to the concept, and her entire worldview got SHOOK.

[philosophicalparadox]

Part of why Ravens are considered Spooky Bad Things We Associate With The Faeries is because they can and do mimic human speech - but much, much better than a parrot. With a parrot, you can tell something is off about the sound. You can tell it doesn’t belong to a human. Ravens don’t sound like that, no, cause they’re overacheivers. (And passerines). They sound EXACTLY like the voice of whoever they are mimicking.

But more importantly they love the sound of human laughter. No one knows why. But it is totally, 100% possible, and it happens to this day, to walk along the paths in the Black Forest and suddenly hear a strange kind of giggling sound, or maybe even a very clear, definitely human sounding “hello?” “Hiiiii!” Or “let’s go!”.

However, it takes a lot of practice for them to copy sounds as perfectly as they do, so you’re equally likely to hear something that definitely sounds human-like, but the words make no sense and the sound is unlike any language you know.

Ravens at the Tower of London do this all the time. Theyre pretty sociable with humans though, so they do it quite openly. I have seen videos of people, mostly Americans, look absolutely spooked out of their skins when a big ol’ raven (mind ye, these are birds that are 2 feet tall with a 5 foot wingspan) comes waltzing up on the deck and starts talking to them.

And ravens, especially the ones there that have been bred and raised by humans for centuries, don’t just imitate - they have one of the same language processing genes we do, and they understand the way a toddler might that things, places, and individuals have names, and can string together basic sentences much like an african grey.

I know because I used to work with one, Darlene, who knew, quite well, what she wanted and how to ask for it. If you were preparing her breakfast, she would hop on up and investigate. She used to be an illegal pet, and had been taught “manners”. That is to say, if she went for something and you told her, sternly, “mind your manners missy!” She would stop, look at you, perhaps for up to a minute, and then point with her beak to what she wanted. If that did not work, she would ask, in plain English, “grape?” Or “Darl have grape?” And lord help you if you gave her anything less than what she asked for. She would throw it at you, and try to bite you, sometimes while saying “No!” In the same tone as I imagine she was reprimanded in her home.

So yeah. Parrots arent the only ones.

[summer-fruits-and-cream]

WHAT

[roseofithaca]

Was anyone gonna tell me that ravens can talk or was I meant to read about it on a tumblr post?!

[retrogradedreaming]

“Ao3 needs an algorithm” no it doesn’t, part of the ao3 experience is scrolling through pages of cursed content looking for the one fic you want to read until you get distracted by a summary so cursed that it completely derails your entire search

[whotwentwrong]

Today’s gender of the day: manspread, mansplain, manwhore

[a-large-orange-cat]

tumblr advertising "you can ask neil gaiman questions about his works!" like that isn't something you can do literally any day of the week on here