i think what makes the couch scene after tuna melt so devastating is the fact that shane is in charge of it all.
like we all know ilya is being big vulnerable the entire time they’re in his house (asking shane to stay, caring for him, family issues etc.) but it’s taken to another level when shane holds the cards on that couch.
shane initiated it and drove the interaction. you can see it in how decisive he is with want he wants in that moment without hesitating and the biggest indication of that for me were the kisses.
thus far ilya’s really been the one who peppers shane with kisses while they are together and this is the opposite of that. shane can’t get enough of ilya in that moment — i’m still trying to fully figure out why tho — and is kissing him all over his face aimlessly because his iron grip on controlling himself is slipping.
and honestly i think it catches ilya a little off guard! he’s being taken apart by this guy he reallllllly likes, he’s melting under shane’s touch, he’s the one at shane’s mercy - not the other way around like typical.
and fuck does it feel good. right? and ilya is already so vulnerable no matter how much he tries to play it off in the moment that it’s almost inevitable that something was going to happen.
letting shane’s name slip was a moment of total submission for ilya, with every single safeguard and wall gone. and that’s why the hurried “hollanders” when shane starts to panic hit so much.
ilya’s “shane” is saying “you have me, i’m ruined” the small smile he has, the soft meaningful kisses are all saying that.
and shane about faces out of that situation as fast as he can because the power dynamic between them has never been flipped. he’s never had to confront his feelings for ilya head on and be responsible for how he might be making ilya feel. so he runs.
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