a mess™

I don't know what I'm doing half the time

[knightesscordelia]

Oh, you think it's "adorable" that I fell asleep on your lap? Well, it's a mark of my utter contempt. That's how little I fear you.

[homunculus-argument]

Fun fact: you can avoid midlife crisis by literally simply just skipping it. Straight-up just skip being middle-aged. Once I turned 30 and aged out of the "young adult" bracket, I skipped straight into being a weird little old man. Record youngest bizarre old geezer in generations. Now if I'm lucky and play my cards right, I've got like 80 or 90 years of being a weird lttle old man left in me. If I manage to do a hundred, I'm going to start telling people that the secret to living to 130 is that I ate an entire pine cone every single day.

That, or that I can't die because heaven isn't taking me and the devil owes me money so he's avoiding me.

[technofeudalism]

i love when i reblog a mutual's post and then they immediately reblog one of mine. it's the closest thing to sharing orange slices you can get on this website.

[egberts]

I really can’t believe we all grew up together on this goddamn bitch of a website

[bibiopic]

[xenosagaepisodeone]

are we not feeling very pious today, brother lionel

[gal-might-write]

BTW when you encounter a character and think "What's this guy's fucking problem?" that's your body trying to give you an out before you fall into obsession.

[lostxanadu]

do you ever start writing a comment on the internet and then think “oh what the fuck am i going on about” and delete it

[bramcrackerswrites]

I also enjoy writing an entire paragraph, thinking "you know, I don't actually need to be involved in this conversation," and deleting it

[crunchymayo]

Lord, grant me the strength to throw away this box that i'll never use, the courage to throw away this box that i'll never use, and the wisdom to throw away this box that i'll never use

[syrenki]

your daughter is a pleasure to have on the dashboard

[thebirdandhersong]

Absolutely horrid that a 10hr sleep does not cure you of all that ails you

[purr-in-ink]

[omtai]

How do they choose which sand to be the glass and which sand to be the sand in an hourglass... Imagine you and your best friend were two grains of sand and you had to be in the hourglass and your bestie had to be the glass. Ur together but youve never been more apart. A Sick and twisted practice hourglassery is...

[popsunner]

I love going viral on tumblr.com. It’s like if you stood in a field and said some of the stupidest shit a human being is capable of and then like fifty thousand crows attacked you

[popsunner]

Don’t do this to me

[professional-chaotic-dumbass]

my brother in christ you made the post

[tulipscomeinallsortsofcolors]

[kinuko]

The only good thing staff added recently

Mutuals we are doing this

[crossroadswrite]

idk about you but i’m a sucker for the we just had sex and it’s the morning after and i woke up to an empty bed and how could i be so stupid of course you left me alone but wait you’re in my kitchen cooking me breakfast and i’m so relieved trope

[sabertoothwalrus]

[whalbi]

Mitsuki and Inko decided to dress the boys up for a walk in the rain, they do not regret their decision 🧡💚

[kkorioio]

Art inspired by @xephemerall fic "under a sea of stars*