Wolfboy's blog

Looking for a muse. Serious inquiries please message or send an ask.

[mellointheory]

Who makes the porn bots. Where do they come from. What do they hope to achieve.

[the-haiku-bot]

Who makes the porn bots.

Where do they come from. What do

they hope to achieve.

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[mellointheory]

and what about you, little haiku bot? do you feel kinship with your brethren? do you understand them? they speak words of enticement and seek love, but are met with disdain. you only parrot the words that cross your screen, but we all love you. or rather, since all you do is reflect us, maybe we simply love ourselves through you.

do you understand them, do you wish you could speak to us like they do? if you found your own voice, would we still care for you?

[the-haiku-bot]

My voice repeats what

you all say: I love you I

love you I love you.

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[solkorolevaa]

[thenewborndeity]

This. This is the first time. The only time. That it was not an echo. It was not found. Oh god.

[catchymemes]

[ottermatopoeia]

Sure i’ll reblog that

[notajerusalemcricketd-deactivat]

Oh I will ABSOLUTELY REBLOG THAT

[oneiriad]

I wonder if, in superhero universes, the villains ever get contacted by those “Make a Wish Foundation” and similar people.

I mean, the heroes do, of course they do, kids who want to meet Spiderman or Superman or get to be carried by the Flash as he runs through Central City for just thirty seconds.

But surely there are also the kids, who - because they are kids and sometimes kids are just weird - decide that what they really, really want is to meet a supervillain. Because he’s scary or she’s awesome or that freeze ray is just really, really cool, you know?

[robininthelabyrinth]

Oh, man, that would absolutely be a thing. The heroes would be so weirded out by it. The villains with codes of ethics would totally band together to force the villains without one (should they be the one requested) to do their part for the cause.

[katyakora]

But imagine the person who has to track down the villains and organise everything?

Like, the first time it happens, no one actually thinks it’s possible, but one of the newbies volunteers to at least try. They get lucky, the kid wants to meet one of the villains who is well known to have a personal code of ethics (eg one of the rogues), and it takes them weeks to track the villain down to this one bar they’ve been seen at a few times, plus a week of staking out said bar, but they finally find them.

So they approach the villain, very politely introduce themselves and explain the situation, finishing with an assurance that, should the villain agree, no law enforcement or heroes will be informed of the meeting.

The villain, assuming it’s a joke, laughs in their face.

At this point, the poor volunteer, who has giving up weeks of their time and no small amount of effort to track down this villain, all so a sweet little girl can meet the person who somehow inspired them, well, at this point the employee sees red.

They explode, yelling at this villain about the little girl who, for some unknown reason, absolutely loved them, had a hand-made stuffed toy of them and was inspired by their struggle to keeping fighting her own and wasn’t the villain supposed to have ethics? The entire bar is witness to this big bad villain getting scolded by some bookish nobody a foot shorter than them.

When the volunteer is done, the villain calmly knocks back their drink, grips the volunteers shoulder and drags them outside. The bar’s patrons assume that person will never be seen again, the volunteer included. But once they’re outside, the villain apologises for their assumption, asks for the kid’s details so they can drop by in the near future, not saying when for obvious reasons. They also give the very relieved volunteer a phone number to call if someone asks for them again.

A week later, the little girl’s room is covered in villain merchandise, several expensive and clearly stolen gifts and she is happily clutching a stack of signed polaroids of her and the villain.

The next time a kid asks to meet a villain, guess who gets that assignment?

Turns out, the first villain was quite touched by the experience of meeting their little fan, and word has gotten around. The second villain happily agrees when they realise it’s the same volunteer who asked the other guy. Unfortunately, one of the heroes sees the villain entering the kid’s hospital and obviously assumes the worst. They rush in, ready to drag the villain out, but the volunteer stands in their way. The hero spends five minutes getting scolded for trying to stop the villain from actually doing a good thing and almost ruining the kid’s wish. The volunteer gets a reputation among villains as someone who can not only be trusted with personal contact numbers but who will do everything they can to keep law enforcement away during their visits.

The volunteer has a phonebook written in cypher of all the villain’s phone numbers, with asterixes next to the ones to call if any other villains give them trouble.

Around the office, they gain the unofficial job title of The Villain Wrangler.

[beka-tiddalik]

The heroes are genuinely flabbergasted by The Villain Wrangler. At first, some of the heroes try to reason with them.

Heroes: “Can’t you, just, give us their contact details? They’ll never even have to know it was you.”

The Villain Wrangler: “Yeah sure, <rollseyes> because all these evil geniuses could never possibly figure out that it’s me who happens to be the common thread in the sudden mass arrests. Look man, even if it wouldn’t get me killed, it would disappoint the kids. You wouldn’t want to disappoint the kids would you?”

Heroes: “… no~ but…”

The Villain Wrangler: “Exactly.”

Eventually, one of the anti-hero types gets frustrated, and decides to take a stand. They kidnap the Villain Wrangler and demand that they give up the contents of the little black book of Villains, or suffer the consequences. It’s For the Greater Good, the anti-hero insists as they tie the Villain Wrangler to a pillar.

The Villain Wrangler: “You complete idiot, put me back before someone figures out that I’m missing.”

Anti-hero: “…excuse me?”

The Villain Wrangler: “Ugh, do I have to spell this out for you? Do you actually want your secret base to be wiped off the map? With us in it? Sugarsticks, how long has it been? If they get suspicious, they check in, and then if I miss a check-in, they tend to come barging into wherever I am just to prove that they can, even if they figure out that they’re not being threatened by proxy. Suffice to say, Auntie Muriel really regretted throwing my phone into the pool when she strenuously objected to me answering it during family time. If they think for even one moment that I’ve given them up, they won’t hesitate to obliterate both of us from their potential misery. You do know some of the people in my book have like missiles and djinni and elemental forces at their disposal, right?”

Anti-hero: “Wait, what? I thought they trusted you?!”

The Villain Wrangler: “Trust is such a strong word!”

Villain: “Indeed.”

Anti-hero: “Wait, wha-” <slumps over, dart sticking out of neck>

The Villain Wrangler: “Thanks. I thought they were going to hurt me.”

Villain: “You did well. You kept them distracted, and gave us time to follow your signal.” <cuts Villain Wrangler free>

The Villain Wrangler: <rubbing circulation back into limbs> “Yeah well, you know me, I do whatever I have to. So I’ll see you Wednesday at four at St Martha’s? I’ve got an 8yo burns unit patient recovering from her latest batch of skin grafts who could really use a pep talk.”

Villain: “… of course. Yes… I… yes.”

The Villain Wrangler: “I just think you could really reach her, you know?”

Villain: <unconsciously runs fingers over mask> “I… yes, but, what should I say?”

The Villain Wrangler: “Whatever advice you think you could have used the most just after.”

Villain: <hoists Anti-hero over shoulder almost absently> “….yes.”

The Villain Wrangler wasn’t lying to the Anti-hero. They know that the more ruthless villains would not hesitate if they thought for one second that the Anti-hero would betray them.

But this is not the first time the Villain Wrangler has gone to extreme lengths to protect their identities.

Trust is a strong word. The Villain Wrangler earned it, and is terrified by what it could mean.

[weezley]

My first official deadpool headcanon is this. This this this.

[fireandwonder]

Okay but this whole concept actually makes a lot of sense, because villains are a lot more likely to be disfigured/disabled/use adaptive devices (bc ableist tropes), so of course, say, a child amputee is going to be more interested in the villain with a robot arm who almost destroyed New York than the heroes that took him down.

Also, imagine one of the kids gets better, and a few years down the line becomes a villain themself, except their crimes are things like smuggling chemo drugs across the border for families that can’t afford treatment, or stealing from corrupt businessmen to make donations to underfunded hospitals (idk this turned into a Leverage AU or something) and every time the heroes encounter her, they’re like “oh no. she’s getting away. curses. welp, nothing we can do.” Though it isn’t that she can’t take them on; bc of course once the villain from way back when found out what she was up to, he started helping/training her. 

“I thought they just hired someone to dress up and pretend to be you,” she says, amazed, when he reveals himself. “I didn’t think they actually got the real you!”

Every year the Villain Wrangler gets a very expensive gift basket from the pair.

[kelssiel]

and for the kids who don’t get better the villains are there too, they show up to every funeral, they bear too small coffins on their shoulders and the heroes stand aside

they are fierce with grieving families assuring them that their child will not be forgotten, and they don’t balk at negative emotions, they don’t tell people to be strong or “celebrate their child’s life,” because these parents have every right to their grief and anger

and the lost children are never forgotten. flowers appear on graves during birthdays and anniversaries, heroes find pictures of those kids and they carefully take them down and ensure they’re delivered to the villain’s cell, and a few villains can be seen with friendship bracelets wrapped around their wrists the cops have learned not to try and take them off

[beka-tiddalik]

And then one day, one of the evil geniuses who happens to specialise in inducing bizarre genetic mutations meets a young fan who was born with a rare genetic disorder that is slowly killing them, and realises that they can help.

Another, who created their own exosuit, talks to a young fan and suddenly understands how much the technology that they have built for themselves could revolutionise quality of life for people with muscular dystrophy, or paraplegia, or other disorders that confine people to wheelchairs with little mobility.

A third thinks of a way that their nanobots could be used to detect and remove cancer cells when their fan, who had been in remission, writes to say that the doctors have found a new metastasizing tumour.

Then shortly after, an evil genius specialising in cloning is contacted by an old colleague asking if a suitable heart couldn’t be grown for their young fan with a congenital heart condition who needs a donor.

Suddenly, a pattern of villains offering (and marketing) their insights and resources to improve medical science starts to arise. Many who had previously been operating on society’s fringes are shocked to receive public accolades, research grants and job offers from major companies because of their work.

A grassroots movement arises advocating for imprisoned villains with appropriate qualifications and/or experience to have access to resources to conduct research for the public good. The Second Chance Rehabilitation Project launches.

(It is an open secret that only people who have been vetted by the Villain Wrangler are allowed to join, because the Villain Wrangler has by now a meticulously set up method and intelligence network to run background checks and character references through ensure that none of the children wishing to meet their role models get hurt.)

Being able to say that one is involved with the Project begins to look really good in parole hearings. The Villains involved perform their own quality checks on one another, because if one of their kids got hurt, then all of their kids could potentially lose out, and the ones that are serious about the Project are not having that. (Also, the ability to collaborate with other geniuses is the most interesting thing to happen to most of them since losing to various heroes, and most consider the intellectual stimulation to be worth putting up with the ridiculous egoes and inevitable personality clashes that arise.)

Reformed Villains come out of the woodwork to advocate about better mental healthcare, and support systems. Savvy universities and private labs quietly take their advice, setting up better mental health supports and laboratory safety standards to prevent the Brain Drain caused by losing their less stable scientists to the Costumes.

The Villain Wrangler watches all of this develop with a smile.

Their plan succeeded beyond their wildest dreams.

[animentality]

I’m so down for these posts that assume the best of people instead of the worst

[showertimeshmoopsie-deactivated]

[peridescent]

tuck him in Tuesday

[peridescent]

tuck him in Tuesday once again

[peridescent]

another tuck him in Tuesday is here

[cyberglittter]

this little angel appeared at my aunt’s house, it’s a female, she slept on the yard yesterday ‘cause she’s feeling safe there. my aunt already has 3 cats, she can afford to adopt her, but she can’t afford to spay and take to the vet. if you can donate anything, here my paypal.

thank you! and please, share too. <3

[cyberglittter]

we got only one donation so far, even $5 is very helpful bc the dollar is expensive here. we need money for the spay surgery ($18), vet & some exams. she’s inside the house rn but she doesn’t have any contact with the other cats bc we need to be careful, we don’t know if she has any kinda of disease, so we need exams.

here’s another video of her. my aunt said she’s the sweetest.

[cyberglittter]

look at how tiny she is

[cyberglittter]

two donations!! thank you, she’s going to the vet tomorrow, hope everything turns well! pls keep boosting <3

[cyberglittter]

she came from the vet, she tested negative for fiv and felv YAYY. the vet said she has a broken tooth due to a kick :(

here’s everything she’ll need:

spay surgery with inhalation anesthesia ($38) blood test ($10) tartarectomy ($93) 

TOTAL= $140

[cyberglittter]

for proofs, here’s what my aunt spent

209 BRL = 38 USD uber: 25 BRL = $4 USD

her name is amora (blackberry) and she’s about 1 or 2 years old <3 thank you!!! 

[runby2]

[passioninblue]

no

[kadethecat]

[runby2]

Just so you all know, my tumblr glitched egregiously so now every time someone reblogs this from me, tumblr takes me off of my dashboard or search results and forces me to see this post again

[runby2]

WHY DID SOMEONE ADD AN INCINERATOR ????

[jauntylittlefrillyboy]

the best way to support libraries is to use libraries. go get a card, check something out. not a big reader? they got movies. they got games. yes, like botw and fallout and let’s go eevee. they also have cds that yes, we workers know you take home and rip to your computer. we also do it. 

if you have a well funded library you might even have access to maker spaces that have 3D printers. or video/audio recording equipment. libraries aren’t these tomb silent homes for books any more. they’re community spaces. they’re full of life and things. 

put a middle finger up at jeffrey bezos and support your local library

[jauntylittlefrillyboy]

did i mention we have printing services that are significantly cheaper than anywhere else? printers are evil, let us handle them for you.

[queenqueso]

Library worker here and can confirm all of these! I’m at a small-to-medium library and we offer ALL of this:

- wifi hotspots that can be checked out for weeks so you can have internet on the go or at home

- CDs, DVDs, blurays including usually multiple copies of new stuff

- A tech lab with a 3d printer, computers for graphic design and game dev focus, VR headsets, and a soundbooth for recording

- Study rooms for solo or groups

- Printers, copiers, faxes, and scanners for just about anything you need taken care of.

- Including a new printer big enough to make giant posters, maps, and business-grade ads.

- A seed library, both floral and food-related.

- A computer lab programed to erase your data and reading history so you’re never at risk while visiting sites like domestic abuse hotlines

- Laptops pre-programmed with Adobe and Office software so you don’t have to buy them

- Monthly author visits

- Ebooks including comics on tons of various platforms

- Classes for those who want to learn how to or better their computer skills

- Art you can check out to hang on your wall for as long as it’s available, including the work of local artists who get paid for their art, especially if it gets popular and we want even more of their stuff.

- Monthly papers ranging from local newspapers to multi-national magazines on just about any topic you can imagine.

- We used to offer food and drink at a loss but You Know ©

- Notaries with extensive legal knowledge including renters rights, getting you in contact with immigration protection, and contacts with pro-bono lawyers.

- A connection with all the libraries in the state, so if we don’t have something, we can have it shipped to you within a matter of days.

- Books translated into multiple languages

- A donation bin for old books/DVDs/VHSes that often turn around and get sold for two or less dollars

- A food donation site for local food banks

- A “suggest a purchase” section on our site where you can support your favorite indie writers/musicians by suggesting their work if we don’t already have it

- We’re growing butterflies this year, and in prior years we hatched chickens! \o/

- An outreach program for the elderly and disabled who hand-deliver almost everything I’ve just mentioned

That’s a huge list and again I have to stress that I work at a library that’s not considered to be very large. And one of the biggest things we get rated by is not how many books we own but by how many people use all of those services I mentioned. They exist for YOU! Use them!

[hekatontarch]

[justcatposts]

My dad filmed our cats for hours when we were growing up 

(Source)

[millennial-review-deactivated20]

[ghost-in-the-ujb-deactivated202]

[fallcaesar]

Santa is on strike due to global warming.  All presents this year will be delivered by Sasha the Christmas Tiger.  Milk and cookies may not be sufficient.

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

“MUST BRING PRESENTS TO GOOD CHILDREN”

“Yes good”

“AND EAT THE BAD ONES”

“Wait no”

“EAT THEM”

“sasha no”

[tolkientrash]

@burstofhope the Christmas tiger is watching

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

She is making a list

It is not easy with her paws but she is making it

[iguanamouth]

shes almost here

[miscriont]

Okay fine this is the ONE Christmas thing I will reblog before Thanksgiving BUT THAT’S IT

[craptaztic]

SASHA’S BACK ON MY DASH!

[mace-from-outerspace]

Y’all better behave, you have two months

[aseriouscomedian]

You better watch out

You better watch out

You better watch out

You better watch out

[unpretty]

The Outbursts of Everett True was a comic strip that ran in papers from 1905 to 1927, wherein the aforementioned Everett True regularly beat the everliving shit out of rude people as a warning to anyone else who might consider being rude. Men have not only been taking up too much room on public transport for about as long as public transport has existed, but the people around them have been irritated about it for at least a hundred years. The next time someone tries to claim that manspreading is a false phenomenon, please direct them to this strip so that Everett True can correct their misconceptions with an umbrella upside the head.

[guyalice]

I have never before heard of Everett True, but if he “regularly beat the everliving shit out of rude people as a warning to anyone else who might consider being rude,” I have a strong spiritual connection with him.

[froginakettle]

[hotcocoachia]

I fucking love him

[jaynavajasso]

i can imagine this guy’s voice very clearly in my head but i couldn’t put a name to it 

[iamtypinglike98madmen-deactivat]

He also jabs racists in the eye!

[tumblunni]

I love the justice grandpa of fists

[cursedcharley]

I’m very lucky to own a book that’s a collection of most of these comics (sadly not all of them) and would highly recommend hunting these down if you can. Sorry for the lack of a scanner but phone photos will just have to do.

He was a enjoyable cuss who didn’t care for war mongering.

Especially profitable war mongering and excuses for it!

He certainly didn’t like selfish husbands and fathers!

Politicians who turned on their words once they got theirs weren’t safe.

He said fuck the police!

He absolutely didn’t like people ruining little things for kids.

He stood up for foreigners. Especially those doing their best to communicate with limited second language knowledge.

He was not having any tomfoolery when it came to gun safety and laws. Especially with youth involved.

You had better not abuse a animal with him nearby. He’d right that wrong real quick!

And best of all him and his wife were both prickly cusses together. Relationship goals.

[biglawbear]

I have a new role model

[briarchubnj]

😍

[runcibility]

“justice grandpa of fists”

[arquus-malvaceae-deactivated202]

It’s nice to see a fat dude in a political cartoon that’s NOT being used as shorthand for greed and corruption.

[charismat1c-megafauna]

Hes like the personification of motherfucker unlimited

[bogleech]

Reblogging this newer version of this thread with so many more strips I haven’t seen…why did this character ever disappear. Where did you go, Everett.

[tramampoline]

we need him more than ever…

[thebibliosphere]

It’s 8:30am and I’ve been up all night working (don’t worry I’m nocturnal) and all I can hear behind me from ETD’s headphones is “spooky scary skeletons” on repeat.

It Begins… 

[thebibliosphere]

Good morning from the Hell House.

(Warning for pulsing light effects.)

[gallusrostromegalus]

In my excitement for the spooky jams, did I just accidentally blast this on the laptop and Wake up every living thing in the house? Maybe.  Don’t care, T’is Motherfucking Spooky Season now.

[gamecubist]

a masterpost

[zagreus]

you can only reblog this every day of the week

[chongoblog]

godless weaday

[eelpatrickharris-deactivated202]

anyone else have one of those Formative Omegle Experiences that’s stuck with you

[eelpatrickharris-deactivated202]

i remember once matching up with this 27 year old mechanic. he found the omegle page open on one the shop’s computers, and he wanted to see what his coworker was up to. we matched up because of our listed “manga” interests.

he asked how old i was, and i lied and said i was 16. as a conversation starter, he asked if i had my license yet, and because i was 12, i said no.

so he starts giving me driving tips. get a junker as your first, because when you finally get a new car, you’ll be able to appreciate it.

stick shift is going out of fashion, and even if you learn how to drive that way and enjoy it, get an automatic. it’ll save your ass on nasty hills and in rush hour traffic.

and most importantly, never hold your hands at 10 and 2. go with 9 and 3. he’d always loved cars, and used to race when he was younger. became pretty well known in the indie circles. one day, he was speeding around the track and just came out of the curve when a girl in the crowd flashed her tits at him.

he was so distracted that he crashed straight into the barrier. due to how he was holding the wheel, he broke both of his arms. he still has a couple lingering issues.

i asked him if it was worth it, and he said yes. he’d do it again if he had the chance. they were the finest tiddies he’d ever seen.

the moral of this story is that, to this day, i grip 9 and 3 when using both hands because wait that’s what tiddy guy said i should do.

[tics-deactivated20201202]

[tics-deactivated20201202]

some wonderful additions from the notes

[theempathogen]

[catchymemes]

[oglach-uisce]

IM SO PROUD?!!!!!!?!!! LIKE WEE MAN IS A FUCKING LEGEND?!!!!!?!!!!!?!

[trans-jesus]

wanted to see a more recent update and

BOIS STILL GOING STRONG YEEHAW U GO LITTLE SCIENCE KID

[skullinitium]

Every time I reblog this I just really hope Daniel’s doing well

[minty-marshmallow7]

i just wanna say i really support daniel in all of his endeavors and i hope hes having a good day

[prismatic-bell]

14-year-old prodigy pursues two University of Michigan degrees

Daniel Liu is pursuing degrees in chemistry, as the youngest member of its prestigious Sanford Group, and another in computer science

This article is from last year. He’s still going strong!

[honeyxmonkey]

WOOO