London Boy (Tanna’s version)

Roc || they/she || minors dni pfp by Ryan w

[fuckrozanov]

when ilya asks shane “worth the wait? 😏” to get his ego stroked and then shane lays those tender loving kisses upon his face…….its so over for you fake ass idgafer i saw your resolve start to crumble🤣🤣🤣🫵🏻🫵🏻🫵🏻

[gaynehollander]

I love Shane Hollander. I love how anything other than first place is repugnant to him, how a silver medal may as well be a dead rat for all he wants it. I love that any emotion that’s slightly too strong will bring him to tears and I love that he stubbornly refuses to let them fall. I love how snarky he is. I love that his vocabulary is 60% cursing and how his media persona would never betray that. I love his need to solidify himself as the unofficial face of the NHL. I love that he shoulders the responsibility of winning so entirely that every loss is a personal failure. I love that his true desires are buried so deep he barely ever even allows himself to recognise them. I love how much he loves being filled, how he craves having Ilya inside him, how he can’t let him leave without tasting him, even after he already fucked him. I love how the only time he can truly let go is when he trusts Ilya to bring him physical pleasure. I love his awkwardness and his pretty face and his freckles and his complete inability to communicate effectively. I just love Shane Hollander.

[polishwave]

Zakaz wyprowadzania ultrasów bez smyczy i kagańca

[kleeklutch]

[rikusqueenofhearts]

[balillee-deactivated20260220]

happy pride month to country mama lynn and country mama lynn only

[iampattonsanders]

Someone give this woman a damn crown and medal

[applejuicewerewolf]

Happy pride month to country mama lynn and ger gay son only

[rabbitheartedfool]

aint it crazy how many people realize they're queer when they have the language to express how they feel and a support system to encourage self exploration????

[wardenaristraith]

I never stop enjoying reading this. Literally everyone's lives improves.

[ya0ishi]

Ancient legends say that if you reblog this on June you get 110% gayer and stronger

[bythehearts]

happy 5th pride month to this post !!!

[steveahoi]

[impala-atnight]

troy barrett is so wet and pathetic and he's being put in hallmark christmas rom com scenarios (his own personal psychological torture chamber) with harris whether he wants them or not

[shanefixxedorally]

Saint Christopher told me even dog may reach heaven. And i am a devoted dog

[littlespoonevan]

I want a fic where the hr universe has its own gay hockey show called break the ice or something and it takes the internet by storm so suddenly games and practices are being infiltrated by social media managers trying to get the players to say if they’ve watched it or who on the team they’d cast in the show and fans of the show who are also hockey rpfers are talking about the main couple of the show being like ‘this is hollanov if u squint’ and Ilya is having the time of his life bc he thinks it’s the best show he’s ever seen in his entire life and Shane is having 1000 mini heart attacks every day bc he legitimately believes someone has figured out he and Ilya are dating and decided to make a tv show about it and of all the ways he thought he could end up getting outed this was never on the spreadsheet

[littlespoonevan]

the writers of break the ice reach out to rose about playing one of the character's beards for a few eps and when shane finds out he demands yuna hire a private investigator to see if he's being followed

[littlespoonevan]

the real plot twist is that the characters in the show lowkey look like hayden and cliff so this starts this big, long-running joke that hayden and marleau are in a secret relationship and hayden and cliff - who know the Truth(tm) - are like 'guys this is great we can take the heat off you two' and ilya doesn't care bc it means he can call hayden pike ugly to the press and be like 'um no my handsome, funny, smart friend is MUCH too good for hayden pike' meanwhile shane is lowkey and irrationally FURIOUS bc what the FUCK do you mean people are calling hayden and marley Cute when he and ilya are right fucking there?!?!?!?!?

[corporrealism]

Saint Sebastian. 24 x 18 inches. Oil on Panel

[vickyvicr]

suck his tongue friday

[swearphil]

something in the way you're looking through my eyes, don't know if I'm gonna make it out alive

[zambonioperator]

timbits shane with mama and papa

[shane-hollabackgirl]

Happy playoff WAG jacket season to those who celebrate

[gaynehollander]

At some point after the cottage but before the public outing TMZ does an article on “Ilya Rozanov’s most high-profile hookups” which is essentially just a list of Instagram models with paparazzi shots and blurry cellphone pics of Ilya at the club. Shane scrolls through it, absolutely seething, because he is Ilya’s most high-profile hookup - maybe not by their metric, which seems to be Instagram followers, but Shane hasn’t heard about a single one of these women, apart from Svetlana whom he wouldn’t have recognised if not for Ilya talking about her. The guys are talking about it in the locker room, as if Ilya’s a legend for getting with all of these supposedly very desirable women (although that is decidedly not the way the guys phrase it) and Shane is absolutely furious because he can’t tell anyone that none of these women got to keep him. He is the only one who’s gotten to call Ilya his. He is the only person Ilya’s been in love with.

Anyway, after the next Boston/Montreal game Ilya shows up to practice genuinely looking like he’s been mauled. His entire body is covered in hickeys and bruises that look suspiciously like bite marks - his neck is basically covered in purpling marks with a fair few centred on his chest but a couple of the bruises trail further down, one on his pubic bone, a couple on his thighs, and the darkest one on his hip, a large circle of clear teeth marks - not only that but his back has been practically scratched to ribbons. Ilya is basically a walking sign spelling out “TAKEN - BACK OFF” and when the gossip of Ilya Rozanov apparently having been locked down by a wild animal reaches the Montreal locker room Shane can’t help the proud little smile that blooms on his face because, yes, that’s his man.

[ill-gotten-gaines]

After they're out, Shane and Ilya record a lifestyle video together for ESPN. ESPN is chomping at the bit: no one can imagine Racecar Rozanov and Hockey IQ Hollander's life behind closed doors, and they want the exclusive.

The crew shows up totally unsure of what to expect, charmed but surprised when it's Ilya opening the door in a tank and sweats and dramatically sighing, "Is meal prep day."

They spend hours filming the couple navigating the kitchen, arguing over how much salt to put in their egg cups, talking about how they learned to cook together when they first made a real go of their relationship.

Shane keeps his hands busy and his eyes focused on his prep work, and that makes it easier to talk about the murky grey area between healthy food choices and disordered eating. Ilya just rubs his back and mocks how he's dicing the bell peppers and keeps calling what he's wearing his "unlucky sweatpants" until Shane hits him in the face with a spatula while mumbling something about tuna melts.

Surprising exactly no one, the video goes viral when it drops on YouTube. It explodes on socials, with thousands of people stitching together Ilya saying "is meal prep day" with videos of their own meal prep, their healthy habits, sharing their own journey to loving food and treating it as fuel and not punishment. They use the tag #eatlikehollanov and it trends immediately.

Ilya's favorite part is when fans start to battle over #eatlikehollanov - the food posts get overtaken with videos and photos of them out at social events, serving cunt and generally looking like top designers battle it out for who gets repped by The Gay Wonder Twins of Hockey (which they do, and stop calling us that, we're married you perverts).

Then Shane and Ilya are spotted at a bar making out in a dark corner and everyone remembers these two probably spend 30% of their waking hours eating each other alive, and suddenly it's #eatlikehollanov munch munch munch yum yum yum.

The Centaurs jump on the trend, sharing their own food prep videos with increasing innuendo. Luca Haas turning bright red while eating a glazed donut gets 3 million views, but Troy really breaks the internet by eating a banana while maintaining eye contact with the camera the whole time. Harris threatens to replace the Kiss Cam at games with #eatlikehollanov and Shane tries his hardest to crawl into a corner and die because he just wanted to share how he protein loads, you guys, why did you have to make it so weird.

Scott Hunter helps not at all by making blueberry and banana smoothies with Kip. Shirtless.

[stonermossprince]

cliff voice you tense cap, you need that no homo suck?

[themoonandmyman]

Literally why does no one reblog posts anymore. It’s not even art and fic now it’s just regular ass posts. why must you keep me go-go dancing in your basement are you ashamed. don’t answer that

[graceebooks]

isnt it kind of cool to have a go go dancer in your basement

[themoonandmyman]

my knees are getting tired