Be the magic you want to see in the world

she/her • Queer◇ • autistic • 23 • mostly reblogs of whatever I'm hyperfixating on atm (currently heated rivalry) • I don't tag stuff

[lockandkeyhyena]

actually we should start headcanoning female characters as being terrible with children

[lockandkeyhyena]

stop mother-ifying fictional literally all female characters. that fictional woman would not know what the fuck to do with a child

[tastylemonbread]

friend who went to bed is a type of dead wife

[didderd-reblogs]

[whydidisavethistomyphone]

[crabussy]

-> listening to a jaunty country style song -> hear the lyrics wrong -> pause. frown. go back a few seconds to relisten -> hears the same fucked up lyrics -> check the actual lyrics to see what it ACTUALLY says

-> oh!

[penandinkprincess]

laughing about the idea of ilya lightly tormenting shane by saying he's going to retire from hockey and become his wag because he knows the one (1) thing that would give shane the ick when it comes to him is the idea of him quitting and not challenging him anymore

like shane tried to play through the feeling the first time ilya said it as a joke in bed because listen. he of ALL people doesn't want to kink shame if this is actually a fantasy ilya wants to play with. but this is also shane's version of thinking he's hiding his expression, which means what ilya was seeing was

[hollanderdiaz]

and if there is a god, he’s the bond that’s between us two

[mymansmoon]

once shane gets over his shock they briefly talk logistics. when exactly ilya intends to go to the cottage. how long he'd like to stay. shane distractedly assures ilya he'll come up with an excuse for his parents as to why he suddenly won't be able to see them for an extended period of time. ilya feels slightly bad about it, but not too much. the hollanders have spent a lifetime with shane. ilya's only just found the conviction to ask for two weeks.

"okay," shane says, after their plan has taken crude shape. the details will come later, after they put their phones down. "okay," he repeats, firmer. then soft again, "I'll see you soon."

ilya feels his strings get cut. he leans against a wall. "see you soon, shane."

svetlana is back in the living room when ilya returns. she whips around on the couch, phone in hand, says, "what the fuck did scott hunter do when I left the room? for five minutes?"

it's a rhetorical question. the tv broadcast has—for now—moved onto highlights of the actual game, but she has her social media open on her phone. ilya makes a vague, loose gesture with his shoulder. "kissed his pretty boyfriend on the ice."

she swears quietly, engrossed again in her feed. "unbelievable. it's your fault I missed it, ilya. your niece's gift is in your suitcase," she adds distractedly. it is. the whale plushie sitting atop the stack of kids' novels sitting atop his serviceably folded clothes. not as neat as hollander's always are. ilya runs his thumb over the edge of his phone case.

"svetlana."

"mm."

"I will not be going to russia."

she breaks from her phone. frowns at him. "what do you mean?"

"I have to be somewhere else."

"where?"

"ottawa."

blinking green eyes. svetlana knows him better than anyone on this planet. he sees her gears turning. there is nothing on the surface of his life that would take him to a place like ottawa, nothing even on the deeper layers svetlana has almost exclusive access to. but there are few things about him that she is completely unaware of. what he has refused to lay bare for her she's deduced the shape of anyway, purely from the nature of his refusals. he sees her eyes flick to the tv. an ad for beer is playing. that's not what she's thinking of.

"is it for a person."

she says more than asks it. either way ilya responds, "yes."

"jane."

"yes."

she lifts her chin, slowly. "montreal jane who is from ottawa." they look at each other, ilya doesn't speak. eventually she shakes her head. "shane hollander, ilya? really?"

ilya sits. she laughs, incredulous, but also triumphant. she'll be annoyed at him later for abandoning her to his family on a moment's notice, but for now there is shane. and hunter. and hunter's surprise boyfriend. and shane. and shane. and shane.

[cliff-marleaus-left-toe]

I have this headcanon where in an alternative universe Ilya had a moment of insight at the beginning of their hookups so when The Raiders asked where he was going instead of saying he was gonna see Montreal Jane he was like 'I am gonna see my close personal friend Shane Hollander we are gonna eat takeout and play videogames in his house he is my best friend actually.' And the Raiders were like, 'Yeah, right.' But he kept the bit, and every time they were in Montreal, he told the Raiders he was meeting Shane, and the rivalry was just league PR bullshit. They never truly believed him, but it didn't really matter at the time. And When they were eventually at the cottage and Shane told Ilya his plan Ilya was like 'Do not be mad but I have been telling Raiders you are my best friend and every time we play monteral I come to see you to play videogames and eat takeout for years and they never belived me so there is still plusably denibility but if you wanna launch a friendship we dont have to wait or built up I already laid the groundwork.' And Shane is in his head like 'I am gonna marry this man.' So they announce the charity the same summer and the raiders are like 'well shit he was telling the truth.' And since Ilya did lay the groundwork, when the media asks them about Ilya and Shane's 'have been friends the whole time' narrative, the Raiders are like, 'Yeah, he told us they were friends; we just didn't believe him.' Which makes the public opinion on their friendship largely positive but doesn't really change the overall timeline all that much just gives them some room to be publicly affectionate and kind of takes the heat off the fanmail gate bc instead of the public thinking it was an enemies-to-lovers hot sex in hotel rooms 9-year situationship with messy breakups and hookups in between they think it was a slow-burn friends-to-lovers situation filled with yearning and Queer self discovery which is more palatable to the public.

[academicblorbo]

Everyone: omg Hollander leash your dog, Ilya is barking at opponent hockey players again

Shane Enabler Hollander: ok so Ilyusha this player has had zero assists in the entire season, he got drafted last, and finally - and this is crucial - he once scored a goal in his own team's net

Ilya Heart Eyes Rozanov: thank you my ShaneWiki this is valuable data, off I go

[bitchass97]

Have we stopped and considered the DEVASTATING two man chirping that could happen when Shane and Ilya are on the same team. I’ve always liked to imagine Ilya is a gossip and loves bringing shit up on ice from players personal life (within reason). Combine that with Shane “I can recite any and all nhl statistics from the last 30 years” Hollander and we have a truly lethal combination.

PLEASE IMAGINE

Ilya: (speaking to Shane very loudly about a player on the other team) Yeah I think his wife is leaving him. He cheated so I don’t feel bad for him.

Shane: oh good for her then.

Ilya: yes good for her. She is way to pretty to be with him anyway

Shane: He’s also not scoring enough points to cheat on anyone. His average goals have been going down drastically in the last few years. He really should focus more on that

Ilya: (now shouting across the rink to said player) MAYBE IF YOU FOCUSED LESS ON OTHER WOMEN AND MORE ON HOCKEY YOU WOULD SCORE A GOAL

[ginger-coke]

ok but the thing is hollanov being soulmates is only half their appeal. they are made for each other, they are chemistry and alchemy and destiny, but they are also masterminds. yes they will find each other in every universe because every universe will force them together, but every universe will also pull them apart. it's not just magic. it's resolve. it's work. it's courage. they will always meet, they will always fall in love, but they will only be together if shane holds out his hand and ilya takes it. the work is crucial. the effort is crucial. do you get me

[virginshane]

ilya calling shane his angel………….

[mutinsfromthemoon]

a short au idea where shane goes to visit his girlfriend by surprise because he was on a work trip and when he knocks on her door it takes a while to swing open, and when it finally does he’s face to face with a half-naked man he’s never seen before and his girlfriend appears behind him and turns all apologetic and starts crying when she notices shane at the door and starts saying it’s not what it looks like and begging for forgiveness, but shane just stands there barely listening, only having eyes for the guy who’s leaning against the doorframe looking completely unbothered, smirking like he’s actually enjoying the whole scene, and it makes shane so mad, so he pulls his hand away from his ex’s grip, breaks up with her, and leaves. he goes straight to his car but doesn’t turn the engine on, just leans his forehead against the steering wheel and stays there for like fifteen minutes, until he hears someone knock on his window and looks up and it’s the guy, so he rolls the window down and snaps “what do you want?”and the guy goes “i didn’t know she had a boyfriend” and shane’s like “so what?” and the guy, smirking just like before, goes “if i knew she had a boyfriend who looked like you, i would’ve been chasing you instead of her” and shane’s thinking this situation is absurd (and secretly pleased) and just asks “what the fuck is your problem?” and the guy goes “my problem is that i clearly chose the wrong one, now you can help me correct it, right?” and he winks at shane, who just flips him off, rolls up the window, and drives away. later shane is at a bar telling what happened to his friends when someone slides into the booth next to him and it’s the guy and his friend rose goes “shane, this is ilya, he’s the guy i met at the painting class and was telling you that you two would be great friends” and shane is sitting there horrified and speechless while ilya gives him that same satisfied smirk and goes “oh shane, we’re definitely going to be GREAT friends” and now shane is truly fucked

[myshangel]

tell me what the teen hollanovings did for shane’s birthday in mafia au baby

oh my god it was an Event.....they knew papa was gna throw a big party as always so they focused on Home Time ....

of course the traditional interpretive dance from the triplets, this year depicting "that time daddy accidentally ate a peanut butter cup and had to go to the ER" (Shane was sweating the entire time bc what actually happened was he got shot. he had to go to the ER because he got shot. and for some fucking reason ilya told the girls he was allergic to peanuts and was having an allergic reaction???) but he's still very touched 🫶

they do presents over breakfast, the twins got him a new engraved watch to go in his collection and the triplets each got him the same book on hockey (they did not coordinate . unfortunately)

yuna and David come over for lunch, which the girls put together (supervised by ilya because they can't have a repeat of last year)

then Shane has to go do some work, so the girls disappear to their rooms to start getting ready for the party. their manor house is fucking huge and has it's own ballroom, and they know papa always goes overboard on party planning.

there are some minor hiccups; lena throws a fit because her boyfriend wasn't invited. two of the three triplets spill something on their dresses and have to change before the party even starts. daddy and papa have a fight over something work-related, but they make up quick, so the girls are happy :)

of course cliff and hayden are running around in the background making sure everything goes smoothly. and then it's party time!!! Shane gets a little too tipsy and he and ilya dance together a Lot and keep kissing on the dancefloor (which makes the girls go EWWWWW) and he keeps coming over to them and being like :) my little ducklings I'm so proud of you :)

[ellisonwongparty]

the way rr/tierney introduce ilya is so funny to me because when you first see him you're just like jeez this guy is such an asshole why is he like this. and then seconds later it's just like um it's because he has a 1) dead mom 2) who killed herself 3) an abusive dad 4) with alzheimers 5) a brother 6) who verbally abuses him on the phone 7) when ilya refuses to wire him 50 bands all at once 8) all while he spends new years eve all alone in the grossest motel you've ever seen 9) and he's bisexual.

and you're just like. well shit. that will do it i guess.

[vesnuszki]

so I’ve been chewing on an idea for a couple of days now brought onto me by @hr-rep. Picture a scenario where in the Shane and Ilya’s first time penetrative „Don’t worry it will fit” it turns out that it doesn’t fit… but it also turns out that Shane is very much into the fact that it doesn’t.

I kinda see this going two ways and both end up influencing the trajectory of their relation.

So there’s Ilya working Shane open on his hand and it’s going very slow. Ilya’s trying his best to do it right, and he knows he’s big and if Shane stays so tight it is not going to work. He tries to get him to relax, brushes his hand at the back of Shane’s neck, voice low and steady talking him through it. Then when he pushes in, it just doesn’t give, and it’s Ilya’s instinct to retreat and call it a day, get each other off like they’re used to. Except!!! Shane’s vision kinda goes white at the intrusion and it hurts but he wants more and his mind focuses only on this one thing. He whines and moans and Ilya’s already pulled back saying we don’t have to, we can try next time. And Shane is desperate to chase that feeling, wants to feel it again, for hours. He says, quietly please please it feels so good.

And they’re both so stressed because they’ve been waiting for this and Ilya wants this to be good for Shane and his brain is kind of stuck in a loop of hurtshane-makeshanefeelgood where he wasn’t anticipating a scenario in which those things are not mutually exclusive.

If Ilya pulled away and said he can’t do it or that they shouldn’t do it like that his first time, imagine what that would do to poor Shane’s brain. Not only is he gay, which if the fact ever saw the light of day his entire career would be in ruin. And now it turns out that he’s also some freak of nature who gets off on his sexual partners hurting him. And he had trusted Ilya with so much of himself that no one else gets to see already, and in the end Ilya, too, rejected him. He’d make Ilya leave shortly after that, and he’d spend the night glaring at the ceiling and beating himself up, vowing to himself to never put himself in a situation like that again. And Ilya tries to reach out to him, asking if he’s okay, if he wants to hook up again, maybe if he just wants to talk but Shane is so so deep in that well that he ends up blocking Ilya’s number.

But then if Ilya went through with it, goaded by Shane’s come on come on it’s just like slamming me into the boards I’m gonna like it it’s part of the game and Shane is so tight and so hot and the sounds he is making are on the verge of agony and ecstasy but Shane’s pushing back into him and a thought settles in Ilya’s head this is how he wants it, give him anything he asks for and his thrusts are getting rougher and Shane is getting louder until Ilya tightens his grip on his ass and slams forward, nailing Shane’s prostate with full force and then Shane is coming, a litany of fuckfuckfuck and moans and after a beat of silence a quiet whispered thank you. And they don’t really talk about it (not until years later anyway), but some unspoken agreement is made, some sort of thread is formed that pulls them back towards each other like magnets, pathetically and helplessly and there’s no one else for them after that.

Anyway, what do you think would happen?

[tinylilhollander]

I need somewhere to talk about AUs that are never going to be fics honestly because today I'm thinking about Princess Diaries Shane, where Shane's been raised by David his whole life because of pressures from the crown, until Yuna shows up, tells him that he's now an heir to the throne because his uncle died, making Yuna the queen. Shane needs to trained to be next in line because she can't have any more children.

And Ilya is the son of a diplomat and they absolutely cannot fall in love but boy do theyy. I'm imagining like Heated Rivalry, Princess Diaries 1 & 2, and RWRB all in one

[tinylilhollander]

@hr-rep Oh this is key!

I think it's less that they stopped being in love, more that the crown didn't approve of David, and Yuna, seeing what it was doing to David, ended up pushing him away. But crucially, crucially – David didn't want to be pushed away. David would have weathered whatever the crown, the media, the people would have thrown at them. It's not like he didn't have his own dysfunctional family. It was always worth it to love Yuna. So he feels completely betrayed and doesn't know how if he can trust Yuna with his heart again. He's reluctant to trust her with Shane's heart too.

Yuna meanwhile didn't ever want David to go. Pushing him away was the hardest thing she's ever done, especially because she knew that it was right for him to take their son away. They were never going to accept him. It was a quiet and elegant solution. But now she's queen – she was never supposed to be queen – and she's so lonely and terrified and she knows she can't give her country the heir it wants, but maybe she can give it the heir it deserves, an heir who knows what it is to live as a commoner.

And then she sees David again, and she wonders why she ever thought sending him away was the solution. Her heart doesn't register a single day of all the years that have passed since they said goodbye. But she can't begin to hope for him to love her again, not after all she's done to him and Shane, what she will still have to put them through for the sake of the crown... can she?