Thwag

[draconym]

do you think two pennies is still enough for the ferryman or has inflation driven up the fare

[draconym]

if he makes me use an app I am simply not crossing the river Styx.

[habkeinb0ck-deactivated20250609]

Művészet

[riverdoge]

the muffled ‘Call Me Maybe’ by Carly Rae Jepsen in the background is what really sells this video for me tbh

[annieskywalker]

Potions master

[stormypaint]

this went from “oh cool” to “damn” to “hOLY F U CK”

[platypusisnotonfire]

I don’t really care what but I crave to be this good at at least one thing during my lifetime

[ithinkthiswasabadidea]

This is my 'Sad Cat' gallery

Where I take screenshots of the characters in some of their most miserable, isolated moments of the first few seconds during the cold open

More will inevitably be added to this gallery

[thenatsdorf]

Itchy snoot. 

[softsaryn]

[headspace-hotel]

HE DIRT BROKEN :(

[the-official-goose-god]

HE DIRT BROKEN :(

[regnbagshaj]

HE DIRT BROKEN :(

[the-rodgulhaj]

HE DIRT BROKEN :(

[betamash]

HE DIRT BROKEN :(

[cee4bugza]

HE DIRT BROKEN :(

[flowtatoexd]

HE DIRT BROKEN :(

[goobleflop]

HE DIRT BROKEN :(

[korvax404]

HE DIRT BROKEN :(

[cr0w1zd3d]

HE DIRT BROKEN :(

[silly-fi5h]

HE DIRT BROKEN :(

[thatglitchfan]

HE DIRT IS BROKEN:(

[toad-in-a-trenchcoat]

HE DIRT BROKEN :(

[byrdiboo]

HE DIRT BROKEN :(

[skyporf]

HE DIRT BROKEN :(

[joy-and-whimsy-official]

HE DIRT BROKEN :(

[tiktoks-for-dead-pope]

[holyfunnyhistoryherring]

Transcript: Yesterday my cousin said that my rooster wasn't a real rooster. He said he's a Walmart rooster. *chicken noises* Does this not look like a real rooster to you? *chicken makes a sound again* Sure, he's small, but he has feelings.

[faeblesmith]

important context this person looks and sounds like they’re gonna cry

[lastoneout]

Also important to note that the rooster appears to be roughly the size of a large pigeon.

[lastoneout]

The pigeon people have informed me he is the size of a normal pigeon, or perhaps even a small pigeon. Fucking rip.

[tweeterwilbury]

Collecting those rn

[tweeterwilbury]

[tweeterwilbury]

[tweeterwilbury]

[not-terezi-pyrope]

I forgot that Americans spell it "mommy" and that therefore "strong as fuck ice mummy" was unabiguously about some sort of undead ice lich, and not ambiguously also about a sort of buff frosty milf archetype like I had been imagining for most of the past couple of years

[cipheramnesia]

I like the way you're thinking, and I want to fund further research on frosty milfs.

[sadomarxist]

[ruckuscauser]

[kaijuno]

[evilwizard]

[ergo-lusus-naturae]

[adz]

one time this nondescript guy came into my dunkin donuts and ordered a small black coffee with blueberry flavor shot, and for some reason that peculiar order stuck with me so much that when, seven months later, i saw him in the parking lot walking towards the door, i quickly made a small black coffee with blueberry flavor shot. he ordered it and i was already holding it. 

i would describe his demeanor that second time as “incredulous”

[honeylemony]

What the fuck who drinks that

[adz]

it’s such a perfectly bonkers order because like, most unusual orders are maximalist and sugary but this one just combines the most basic drink with the most incongruous little add-on. it’s the order of a simple, regular man who has something wrong with him

[phage-necro]

this post always makes me laugh. this guy has the weirdest drink order and he probably never goes to this dunkin’ if it took seven months for the barista to see him again. so think about a coffee shop you go to so little you’re not even sure if you’ve gone there before and you walk in and the barista hands you the drink you were about to order before you even ordered it. he will remember that for the rest of his life

[adulthoodisokay]

“it’s the order of a simple, regular man who has something wrong with him” gets me every time.

[furiosa-femininst]

CINEMA 😩👌

[miseria-fortes-viros]

ultimately the truth about frankenstein is that we are all grotesque amalgamations of the best and worst parts of everyone who came before us. and sometimes the people who are supposed to love us because of and in spite of this will not. and we can kill them with hammers for that. and i think that’s beautiful

[miseria-fortes-viros]

my brother in christ frankenstein is the title of the book

[warlockofagnesi]

COUNTERPOINT

[miseria-fortes-viros]

well i can’t argue with that one

[quacksmith]

Ah yes, Mary Shelley’s monster.

[miseria-fortes-viros]

no mary shelley is the name of the monster not the doctor

[villainessbian]

common misconception! mary shelley's monster was actually lord byron

[lillie-garden]

kissing you on the forehead

[increasingpanic-deactivated2024]

with tongue?

[lillie-garden]

with tongue. 🥰

[just-taking-adam-break]

[quasi-normalcy]

I don't trust anyone who hasn't acknowledged their capacity for evil.

[quasi-normalcy]

"I'm just a smol bean uwu" No sir, what you are is someone who is so habituated to thinking of yourself as innocent that you will continue to do so even when you're guilty.

[thepictureofmadamec]

To quote Chris Fleming

"You know that thing where the most toxic person you've ever met over-relates to woodland creatures on social media? I call it Vibe Dysphoria. She'll put up a picture of a mouse in a jean jacket with 'It's me.' That is not you. I don't know how you got under the impression that you are a mouse in a jean jacket. You are an eel with a gun.She posts a toad with a basket of mushrooms like 'Me doing my little things.' Oh madam, there is nothing little about your things. You gave me psychosexual issues I'll carry to my watery grave. You are not a toad in the forest...You are a cruel woman who just happens to be small."--Chris Fleming

[paulgadzikowski]

It’s like the Dumbo story, you’ve all probably seen it

[eternalgirlscout]

earlier today i told an acquaintance in passing that i'll often be in the middle of a novel and think "man i wish this shit were more ambiguous" and had to reiterate twice that i wasn't being sarcastic before they believed me, so this post is to say: i love when writers don't bother to explain everything, i love when stories end uncertain and unsettling, i love being required to think as a reader, i love when stuff makes no damn sense, no i'm not kidding

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Tumblr being the "piss on the poor" reading comprehension site makes sense when you realize that 79% of adults in the US are functionally illiterate. Same goes for Twitter and TikTok.

that's a real high number, sport. where'd you get it?

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

hey anon

please tell me you didn't google "US literacy rates" and then make the funniest possible mistake one could make in that situation