[dogpuppy]

[pronouncingitwang]

at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you

[yokowan]

at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.

[le-jardin-inculte]

at some point in your life you will be making some sort of cream based dessert that requires gelatin to thicken it. and you will soak some gelatin sheets in water and think "this is too few gelatin sheets for this amount of cream." this is the devil speaking. it will thicken in the fridge and if you add too much you will end up with milk jelly

[shithowdy]

at some point in your life you will be baking cookies. you will take the sheet out after twelve minutes as the recipe instructs and the cookies will still be glistening and soft. "these don't seem cooked enough," you will think to yourself, "i should place them back into the oven until their edges are nice and golden." this is the devil talking. this is how you get dry, overdone cookies. the cookies will continue to bake on the warm sheet for several more minutes and then harden up after sitting on a rack for a while. trust the process. trust the process.

[whitachi]

at some point in your life you will be adding a small pasta to a soup and you will think "that is not enough small pasta." this is the devil talking. the pasta will absorb the stock and expand. this is how you end up with a soup that is a solid mass of soggy ditalini.

[araceil]

At some point in your life you will be adding garlic to a dish and you will think "that is not enough garlic." These are angels speaking. They are correct. Add more garlic.

[punished-venom-solitair-e]

everyone post your biggest hear me outs my friend just showed me two conventionally attractive white men in a row i need to teach him what a real hear me out is

[gardenofeden5457]

.world's largest excavator- nay, world's largest vehicle- the bagger 288

.also, scale reference! just the wheel is 70 feet in diameter

[artemis-heart-emoji-heart-emoji]

The soon to transition Mrs Nice Guy: No more Mr Nice Guy

[oobertscoobert]

closeted trans man who’s bluffing about how far his influence extends: I’ve got a man on the inside

[greelin]

everyone is so hateful and lacking in whimsy

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[purlturtle]

[ansixilus]

You're right and you should say it.

[tawked-deactivated20260714]

Superman desperately scanning the street during a fight to find the most morally acceptable car to throw at his opponent, knowing that not everybody has insurance, and loss of transportation can ruin a life -

A wave of incredible relief washes over him as he spots the hard geometric lines and silver paintless sheen of a Cybertruck.

[cipheramnesia]

This is so unfair, you know he's fast enough to fly to a Tesla dealership and back in a second

[thecheatinghomunculus]

new reaction image

[rural-panoptes]

[saintjosie]

[damnpharos]

[captain-price-unofficially]

[deerkibble]

[sneakyspades]

[the-quasar-hero]

I could NOT be in feudal Japan. Here are some reasons why

I wasn’t born then.

[dreamyslothbunny]

WRONG! Time travel beam

[the-quasar-hero]

[areawest]

クソ、これはダメだ。

[the-quasar-hero]

さて、私は何をすべきでしょうか？

[sometimes-me]

[tumblr]人は、人形のようにｊｐｅｇで遊ぶことが大好きだね。。。

[pixelartjourney]

Just make it exist first, you can make it good later

[oneheadtoanother]

[yr-tiktok-mom]

[syrnyj]

[summer-fruits-and-cream]

[what-even-is-thiss]

I still find it pretty funny that in fallout 3 you can get your karma down by just opening Moriarty’s terminal over and over again.

The slavers at paradise falls have heard of me. I’m the guy that opens people’s computers over and over again without asking first.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Butch won’t be my companion. He’s like you’re too intense. You must’ve turned on that computer like 50 times in a row last time.

[what-even-is-thiss]

My forbidden computer touching ways have caught up with me.

[what-even-is-thiss]

The reason I’m doing this in the first place is that a lot of evil karma options in fallout 3 are just inconvenient. Like I could go out of my way to blow up a city or I could not blow up a city and get a much more convenient free house and keep access to their merchants.

So in order to keep getting the full evil karma experience, every time I do something convenient or utilitarian that raises my karma I go back to Moriarty’s Saloon and just open his terminal over and over again.

Thus, my good boy points are eliminated through repeated computer touching and the regulators here are hunting me down for looking at Moriarty’s personal data a hundred times in a row.

[what-even-is-thiss]

What’s really funny about lowering your karma this way is that after you do a major good Karma action and listen to the radio, the radio DJ Three Dog will be like this horrible fucker from vault 101 we all hate him so much you know that guy? He did another fucking thing. He saved a thousand orphans.

[what-even-is-thiss]

I think you meant to say that this is one of the best games of all time

[the-haiku-bot]

I think you meant to

say that this is one of the

best games of all time

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[familiarlyfrigid]

Shoutout to everyone who likes to traumatize characters just for fun

Like, I’m not doing it to cope with anything, I’m doing it for the love of the game

[thedreadpiratecam]

microdosing hell by being awake and literate

[dogpuppy]

[nineteenyearoldmeblog]

im fucking crying

[wyrmicelli]

me tongue-deep in a sandalwood candle: 🤤

the tjmaxx employee loading a fourth tranquilizer dart into their blowgun: i need backup

[snowown]