Adam, Bruce Wayne’s Wayne Enterprises PA, has seen a lot of stuff in his short tenure. Mr Wayne isn’t as stuck up as most of the senior partners on the floor and he’s genuinely a pleasure to work with but Mr Wayne… he’s weird. Not in a pervy way or an eccentric billionaire. It’s just Mr Wayne says the strangest things and the weirdest coincidences just happen when he’s around.
Adam will often walk into Mr Wayne’s office and find one of his various children camping out in there while their dad is in a meeting. Sometimes one of them will be balancing on the back of a chair or doing front walk-overs across the desk. One of them will be using their dad’s computer, hacking it Adam suspects. Mr Wayne’s daughter just appears like a ghost but she’s nice, her blonde friend is a lot. One of the kids just comes in and waits, he has accidentally broken that same ornament on Mr Wayne’s office twice. One just seems to like spinning in the chair for dramatic effect. Most of them are behaved or at least keep their shennigans inside the office. They don’t bother him. The little one sometimes buzzes for a tea, usually with a set of precise instructions but other than that, they are pretty chill kids. They are just fucking odd.
Mr Wayne just has the weirdest conversations… with himself. Adam has opened the intercom or the door to tell Mr Wayne that his appointment is here to see him and just hear the tail end of conversations Mr Wayne is having seemingly with himself. “… can’t just drop everything, tear off this suit and go frolicking across the rooftops in broad daylight” is Adam’s favourite one. But one time he walked in while Mr Wayne was in the middle of saying “…I can’t just get Batman out of my life, he’s as much a part of me as-” only to cut off when he noticed Adam. Mr Wayne is clearly dating Batman and the vigilante is making uncomfortable demands of the sweet billionaire.
Adam has also witnessed Mr Wayne, clearly under the influence of medication, collapse in his office and just lie there in a heap, quietly muttering to the carpet. Adam, being worried about the boss, tried to help him up and asked him whether he needed a doctor only for Mr Wayne to refuse the ambulance and just ask Adam to let him nap here, right on this burberry carpet. Adam read him the reports while he dozed before getting up and making a call to Mr Pennyworth at the mansion who assured Adam that Mr Wayne was alright, he just hadn’t slept properly but Pennyworth will come and collect him.
Mr Wayne has called Adam his kids names, Mr Pennyworth’s name and once or twice, strangely as “Robin”. The office thinks that it is a joke on the boss’s behalf because you never see Mr Wayne without Adam, just like you never see Batman without a Robin. Adam doesn’t even correct him any more.
Mr Wayne hates the fancy luncheons that are held in the board room for important events. Mr Wayne’s idea lunch hour is spent in the office with the door locked and with a BatBurger Deluxe with barbecue sauce rather than ketchup, with Jokerised fries and a side order of Night-Wings. He doesn’t do anything but eat and watch some trashy reality show. He will take no calls, he isn’t to be disturbed unless his kids have “life threatening injuries”.
Adam will usually recieve any gifts Mr Wayne receives from brown nosers. Expensive wines, nice art work, dinner reservations, holidays to exclusive resorts. Mr Wayne will hear a description of it or views it and says that Adam can have it but only after Mr Wayne has it analysed ij the lab or vetted by “his guy”. Adam thinks its weird but hey, this is Gotham.
Mr Wayne is terrified of bats and any bat related insignia. No Batman themed mugs or paraphernalia are allowed in his eye sight because Mr Wayne will have a panic attack and will need to have one of his “lie-downs” which involves him laying on the sofa in his office with a cool cloth over his eyes with an aroma candle lit. Mr Wayne will get back to you when he’s balanced his humours again.
One time Mr Wayne spilled his espresso all over himself right before a meeting and gave Adam is car keys to fetch the spare in his back seat. Adam found the shirt, that and a travel Bat Suit but he just put that second thing back, hurried to get the shirt to Mr Wayne who looks very cagey now. “It’s a bedroom thing,” Mr Wayne admits in the silence. Adam just nods and backs out of the room.
