howdy folks :]

doot doot

[staff]

we fucked up

[aemelia]

THE WITCH IS DEAD | 1. Ray Bradbury, Long After Midnight; 2. Jeannette Walls, The Glass Castle; 3. Horsecrazy, The Book of Merthur; 4. T. Thorn Coyle, Evolutionary Witchcraft; 5. Lisa Taddeo, Three Women; 6. Unknown; 7. Virginia Woolf, The Letters of Vita Sackville-West to Virginia Woolf; 8. Mary Shelley, Frankenstein; 9. Gabriela Mistral, Madwomen; 10. Marguerite Duras, Agatha et les Lectures Illimitées; 11. Sady Doyle, Dead Blondes and Bad Mothers: Monstrosity, Patriarchy, and the Fear of Female Power; 12. Ellie Wriglesworth, The Harpy; 13. Sara McCartney, The Rise of the Girl Monster; 14. Elana Dykewomon, Notes for a Magazine: Sinister Wisdom; 15. Nancy Lee, What Hurts Going Down; 16. Catherynne M. Valente, Deathless; 17. Hannah Williams, The Resurgence of the Monstrous Feminine; 18. Mary Shelley, Frankenstein; 19. Peter Jackson, The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King; 20. J.R.R. Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King; 21. Barbara Creed, The Monstrous Feminine: Film, Feminism and Psychoanalysis; 22. Sandra Cisneros, Loose Woman; 23. William Shakespeare, Othello; 24. Maria Pawlikowska-Jasnorzewska, Ophelia (1926); 25. Stephen Schwartz, Wicked. @merlinbingo

[tomatatoro]

[onion-souls]

Phenomenon is a great word. It means "Thingy" but when you don't want to sound stupid

[onion-souls]

"Thingy (possibly happening?)" Vs. "Thingy (possibly dude?)"

[onion-souls]

Anomaly is another great one: "thingy (???)"

[pineplapple]

I remember october like it was yesterday

[poirott]

COLUMBO SEASON 3 Peter Falk as Lieutenant Columbo

[mithrandirl]

MURDERBOT | 1.01 / 1.10

[deathshallbenomore]

conclave 2024 was so real we even get conclave 2025

[targetedknowledge]

[painstakinglybad]

There's so much more.

[moniquill]

This is a character in a Don Bluth film who sings in a bass voice.

[motherfucker-unlimited]

[sndwave]

the funniest thing in the entire pirates of the caribbean series is definitely that one scene in At World’s End where they have parlay but davy jones is part of it, and rather than have him stand in the shallows or something they get a big bucket of water and have in stand on it on shore

who thought of that idea? who thought “put davy jones in a bucket of water” and had the guts to suggest it aloud? and then who went “hey that sounds like a great idea!”

at some point someone told davy jones their idea was for him to stand in a bucket of water and he agreed to it

[sndwave]

*stands majestically in a bucket*

[stemmmm]

ok but notice the trail of buckets behind him meaning he walked from the ocean through three other buckets of water before he got into the one hes standing in

[prokopetz]

It’s even funnier when you consider how he must have figured all this out in the first place.

Some folks are asking “well, if he can avoid the no-dry-land curse simply by standing in a bucket, doesn’t that ruin his whole motivation?”, but he’s not on dry land here.

The parley takes place on a sandbar - which, for the unfamiliar, is a temporary “island” of sand deposited by breaking waves, unconnected with the shore, that spends most of its time submerged, being exposed only at low tide.

What Jones is doing here is rules-lawyering his curse. Can you imagine the trial and error he must have gone through in order to determine that this would actually work?

“Okay, do islands count as dry land? How about parts of the shore below the high tide mark? Reefs? Shoals? What if I stand in a pool of water on a shoal? Does it have to be seawater, or will any water do? Does it have to be a natural tidepool, or can it be something artificial, like a bucket?”

What I am saying is that there must have been a process.

[stumblngrumbl]

Pretty sure that this implies that the reverse - a bucket of sand, floating on the water (big bucket with just a bit of sand), would qualify as dry land. That’s absurd, so I’m pretty sure that his lawyer pulled a fast one over the curse governor.

[prokopetz]

It may be absurd, but the text of the film bears it out. Davy Jones can sense the presence of his heart while it’s at sea, but not while it’s on land (indeed, that’s why he buried it on land in the first place: to break his connection with it) - yet placing the heart in a simple jar of dirt conceals it from Jones’ awareness just as surely as burial on land does, even if the jar is on a boat at the time. Suitably prepared vessels filled with dirt absolutely count as dry land for the purpose of Jones’ curse.

[silver-tongues-blog]

Then the reverse should also be true. If he buried it in a jar of water, no matter how far inland it is, he would be able to sense it. So by this logic, any container of seawater counts as not dry land, ergo, the bucket is a perfectly viable loophole.

[prokopetz]

Not necessarily. It’s traditionally a lot easier to accidentally get whammied by a curse than it is to weasel around it - I figure that’s why he’s using multiple layers of indirection here. He’s forbidden to set foot on dry land, but it’s technically not dry land (it’s a sandbar, a non-permanent landform exposed only at low tide) and he technically didn’t set foot on it (he’s standing in a bucket of water). It’s entirely possible that either one of those things alone wouldn’t make the grade.

[officialharshnoise]

okay but this all raises one further, very important question: if it’s specifically “dry land” he’s forbidden from, what about wetlands. can Davy Jones fight you in salt marshes? can he throw down in a peat bog?Swamp Battle?

[musicalhell]

This is the quality content I come to Tumblr for.

[karometeenk]

could he step on land if his shoes are wet?

[there-was-a-girl]

No matter how ridiculous PotC gets I will love it. Especially when it results in conversations like this

[glumshoe]

What if he crawls around on his hands and knees, with his feet raised slightly into the air? Can he walk on his hands? Can he ride around in a litter or a wheelchair?

[princedorkface]

can he be in a wheelbarrow?

[bemusedlybespectacled]

What if he flies over dry land? Like in a hot air balloon, or in the claws of a giant bird?

[pantheraj]

What if he’s carried by two swallows using a strand of creeper?

[strikelikeahawk]

European swallows or African swallows?

[thinster13]

this whole thread reads like a conversation between these two:

In fact im not entirely sure that it wasn’t their idea in the first place

[weaselle]

Davey Jones: “It’s killing me that I can’t be at the meeting because of this stupid curse”

Pintel: *licks a spot off his wooden eye and pops it back in his head* Actually, Cap’n, beggin’ yer pardon, but Ragetti an’ me been doin’ quite a lot of theo-retic-ising about that

Ragetti: *very seriously* yeah, men o’ science, what we is, an’ that’s a fact. G’wan Pintel, tell ‘im what I said

Pintel: *suprised* Oh? well, you said “dunno what’s so bad about the Cap’n bein’ an ugly scary monster” and I said “pro’ly wants a beard doesn’t fight ‘im when ‘e brushes it” and you said “pro’ly does smell half a rotten squid if ‘e kiss you” and then you said –

Ragetti: *bopping him over the head with the cannon ramrod” not that, not that! The other thing!

Pintel: right! That do make more sense dunnit, right, Ragetti ‘e said, like, the ocean got land too, just, under the water like, an’, well, it got me thinkin’… you know how a sand bar is just ocean land that pokes up sometimes?

Davey Jones: *massaging his temples with his tentacles* listen, it won’t work, if it’s not underwater then it be dry land

Ragetti: That’s what I said! But then Pintel, ‘e says – 

Pintel: *holding up a bucket* what if technically it WAS underneath some water?

Davy Jones:

[ourhasretgultekin]

[catboybiologist]

Come for the woman in the cocktail dress, stay for the looney toons ass production

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

However you think this video is gonna end, I promise you, your not ready XD

[gummybearattacktheworldofdespair]

[the-real-seebs]

one way to read this is "this man has no idea what he is saying"

another to read this is "this man is terminally online and has excellent comedic timing"

[lemonsharks]

@taraljc

[taraljc]

dioramas ARE lit

[thoodleoo]

hades explaining that he’s the god of the dead, not the god of death

[moonlitlillypop]

Thanatos explaining that he’s the god of death, not hades

[moonlitlillypop]

Thanatos explaining that it applies to animals too

[mando-lore]

Poseidon explaining that he is the god of the seas and oceans

[roomba-with-knives-taped-to-it]

Zeus explaining why he can’t keep it in his pants

[miceprincess]

Hermes explaining why he gotta go fast

[memesandmylife]

dionysus explaining why he’s Like That

[femur-theif]

All of these are so accurate it hurts

[glass-trash-bab]

@nicadenic

[lesbian-velma-rights]

Also Hermes, God of messengers

[confusedwitch-deactivated202412]

And Eris, Goddess of discord and chaos

[greelin]

“the other day” could mean anything with me. literally yesterday. or a week ago. Seven years past.

[lilboreddev-blog]

reblog if your name isn't Amanda.

[thatblackwatchdouche-blog-blog]

2,121,566 people are not Amanda and counting!

We’ll find you Amanda.

[iceslushii]

this has almost 11 million notes what is this

[yiffmaster]

I’ve never seen this post once in 10 years on this site

[llsilvertail]

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

I’ve never even heard of this before tho??? Wtf??????????

[computationalcalculator]

oh my god, I didn’t think there were any surviving versions of this post left

For those who weren’t around in the Deep Lore times, this is one of the relics of the editable post era. This post has THE SINGLE HIGHEST NOTES of ANY post on this site, bar none, but with more than a dozen variations. Every single post you’ve ever seen with more than 3 million notes has been a different version of this one.

This is the “Dean’s Gym Shorts” post. This is the Flubber post. This is the original “Reblog if you support gay people” post. it was ALL of them. before half the site got nuked, it had even more notes than it has now - at one point, well over 15 million, and that was years ago.

This, with no exaggeration, is the ONE TRUE heritage post

[aenslem]

Leverage (2008–2012) & Leverage: Redemption (2021–) x DOCTOR WHO