Aaaaaaaaa!!!

[reoricecake]

When Tim tells people he’s dating someone (Bernard).

Tim: by the way, B. I’ve been wanting to say. I got a boyfriend.

Bruce: That’s great, son. I’m glad you worked things out with Kon.

Tim:

Tim: Kon?

Bruce: *Pauses*

Bruce: Is he not your new boyfriend?

Tim: No! It’s a guy called Bernard.

Bruce: ..Oh. Well, congratulations, Tim.

Tim: Thanks…

———

Tim: I’m going out with my boyfriend, see you guys later.

Dick: I thought Kon was in outer space?

Tim: …My boyfriend. Not Kon.

Dick: Your boyfriend.. Not Kon?

Tim: No.

Dick: …

Dick: Have fun, Timmy!

Tim: …oooohkay.

———

Jason: Your boyfriend is here, replacement.

Tim: Bernard?

Jason: Wait, what?

Tim: My boyfriend, Bernard?

Jason: *points to the window*

Jason: I meant Kon.

Tim: He is not my boyfriend.

Kon: Are you going to let me in?

Jason + Tim: *looks at Kon.*

Jason + Tim: *goes back to their conversation*

———

Tim: Hey Alfred, I wanted to let you know my boyfriend is coming over for dinner.

Alfred: Of course, I’ll make sure we have enough for master Conner.

Tim:

Tim: You mean Bernard?

Alfred: Yes, Master Bernard.

———

Bart: Whoareyoutextingisityourpartner?

Tim: *Hides his phone*

Tim: Yes. My boyfriend. Now leave me alone.

Cassie: Wait, you got a boyfriend?

Bart: *Looks around and notices a certain super isn’t here*

Bart: Well, I have a hint on who it is.

Tim: There’s no way you know him.

Cassie: Isn’t he literally our teammate?

Tim: For the last time, it’s not Kon!

[cyberheartpolice]

Fanboy Tim

So Tim had a pretty rough time becoming Robin. He stood in the shadow of a ghost, batman and nightwing was very overprotective, he had to prove himself more capable then then robins before him (prove that he wouldnt die like the last one). To top it all of his childhod hero (and the ghost he had to live up to) came back from the dead just to try to kill him.

The thing is before all that he was a fanboy. He was obsesed with the robins and a general menace. The family knew that he had looked up to them and that he had stalked them a litte. But they did not grasp how deep it went. They didnt know about the folders opon folders of pictures, they didnt know about his involvment on fansites and they sertanly didnt know about his favorite Robin. In a weird way Tim is really gratefull that Jason slit his throat the first time they meet. He could deal with almost dying but he would never live it down if Jason found out just how borderline obsesive he had been over him as a kid.

[cyberheartpolice]

The most tragic part is that Jason wouldnt even make fun of him. he would be to bussy having a absolute breakdown thinking about how he almost killed a kid that had nothing but love for him.

Jason finding out that Tim used to look up to him.

Tim "Omfg, no thats so embarasing"

Jason "The only thing you could think about when i stabed you was that you were happy that i was alive and sad that i hated you!!!!!?" "Are you okay???"

Jason later "Holly shit i'm a monster"

[cyberheartpolice]

Fanboy Tim

So Tim had a pretty rough time becoming Robin. He stood in the shadow of a ghost, batman and nightwing was very overprotective, he had to prove himself more capable then then robins before him (prove that he wouldnt die like the last one). To top it all of his childhod hero (and the ghost he had to live up to) came back from the dead just to try to kill him.

The thing is before all that he was a fanboy. He was obsesed with the robins and a general menace. The family knew that he had looked up to them and that he had stalked them a litte. But they did not grasp how deep it went. They didnt know about the folders opon folders of pictures, they didnt know about his involvment on fansites and they sertanly didnt know about his favorite Robin. In a weird way Tim is really gratefull that Jason slit his throat the first time they meet. He could deal with almost dying but he would never live it down if Jason found out just how borderline obsesive he had been over him as a kid.

[cyberheartpolice]

Tim drake having crazy good contingiency plans for kryptonians due to knowlage gained from freaky sun lamp sex with Kon.

that's it that's the post

[cyberheartpolice]

headcanon

Ok so what if, and hear me out. Bruce lied to his kids.

Not like big lies, that would be counterproductive they need to have knowlage of the world around them. But when waying the morality of leting your 13 year old son deal with gang wars, human traficing and god forbid activaly hunting down roges and lying to a child the answer is obvoius.

You see when it became clear that he was ether gonna have to let Dick become robin or spend everyday watching him to make sure he would not slip out on his own. Bruce found a third option. Fake roges, fake cases, patrol in the calmest of areas alredy under protection from the "calmer" of the gangs. As long as Dick belived he was doing importaint work Batman would be able to train him while minimising the risk drasticaly. Examples of these "missions" were

1.When there is clearly a corpse behind the door after a break in they are investigating "Robin, we need to serch the crime scene for evidence. Clearly these orange rocks have been contaminated with something, we will need to run them through the Bat-computer. Collect them and bring them back to me"

2. When Batman actualy needs to go on patrol looking for human traficing victums or keep an eye on the worst of crime alley "The pen-man is back at it! Robin i trust you to look through these case files to try to find his base of operations, i will need to patrol for more clues"

3. Dick is getting suspicious of the fake rouges and also its fun father son time "The Riddler has kidnapped the pinguins in the zoo in a convoluted plot to get to the Penguin(TM). Robin help me solve these riddles or we might have a gang war on our hands"

[msburgundy-but-worser-deactivat]

mythbusters was so good because it wasn't a killjoy show. they didn't just say "see, it doesn't work" and leave it there

whenever they find that the stunt doesn't work as portrayed in the movie, they immediately ask "what would it take to make this happen?"

[disclaymore-deactivated20230920]

“we know it takes this amount of explosives to work, but what if we doubled it anyway?”

[oldschoolvillageidiot]

Some myths I'll always remember:

* Are elephants scared of mice? (They only did that because they were in Africa and had access to elephants.)

* Will a bull run amok in a china shop?

* Is it better to run zig-zag or straight when chased by an alligator?

I love these because NONE of them turned out the way they expected. They went into all three with pre-conceived ideas of how it would go, and each time they "failed." Elephants WILL cower from mice. A bull moves very gingerly through a china shop. It doesn't matter how you run because ALLIGATORS WON'T CHASE YOU.

And each time, they reacted with just... pure glee. "Holy shit, we were wrong! Oh my god! This is great! We were so wrong!"

And that, to me, is what science is. Being excited about being wrong because either way it's information.

[6vcr]

[idiopathicsmile]

a horror movie about making a horror movie. wait, don't walk away. a horror movie about one of those grueling seventies productions that broke every OSHA rule—long, exhausting shoots in the middle of the woods, presided over by one of those directors convinced of his own genius and certain the only way to get the performances he needs is to relentlessly isolate and gaslight his female lead. the crew are terrified of the director's outbursts and so are going along with it. there's one other woman in the cast but she plays the one who takes her shirt off earlier in the film and then dies, and the director has done everything in his power to turn these two people against each other, the better to keep his female lead unbalanced and unsure, and when the deeply disquieting scary stuff starts happening for real, the female lead has nobody to confide in and assumes it is the director very characteristically going out of his way to fuck with her. one of the camera operators gets possessed and is being flung around the trees, head spinning as he oozes an acidic black liquid and the female lead is like, "i can't let fucking jerry think he's getting to me." and then—this may be too much, idk—the only way the two actresses can figure out what's really going on is to acknowledge that they've been pitted against each other and that they really don't have any reason beyond this not to trust each other, so they compare notes and that's how they discover that hey, this production actually is cursed.

[aro-rambles]

can you fucking imagine if there was a poll going around asking if bisexual people were queer??? or trans people even. anything after the G other than A really (and if you say A is for ally I am killing you with a piano).

it would be fucking ridiculous, wouldn't it?

yeah so the "are cishet aromantic men queer" poll should be seen by EVERYONE as fucking ridiculous. because it is. it's not really up for debate.

if someone asked you right now, are lesbians queer, you'd tell them to touch grass. at best. you'd probably ignore them if we're being honest. but suddenly when they ask about aromantic people it's up for debate? or worse you "don't want to get involved"?

aromantic people are queer. whether you like it or not.

[vroomvroomwee-deactivated202508]

Petition to give every aroace person a free ticket to a rage room every month as gratitude for keeping their shit together and not pulling everyone's hair off in the face of society's amatonormative bullshit

[kiwimuichiro]

"Aros aren't queer-" GUILLOTINE GUILLOTINE GUILLOTINE GUILLOTINE GUILLOTINE GUILLOTINE GUILLOTINE GUILLOTINE

[arotechno]

it's been nearly 10 years, for me. maybe that makes me old guard now, i don't know.

but i was lonely for so, so long. this website robbed me of my sense of self, forced me deeper into the closet for so, SO long. but you know what? i'm not scared anymore.

to young aros: the life you want is possible. there is a future for you, even if you have to scrape and crawl your way there and build it from scratch with your own hands, with no blueprints.

take it from me. i've heard it all, sometimes from other aros, even. but after everything, i am still here, and i will always be here. they'll try, boy will they try, but no one can ever take your lived experiences from you. you know yourself best. and, hey, if people have a problem with that, fuck 'em. hit them with hammers.

[wellwaterhysteria]

cousin just came up to me and was like “did you want to have a nap? because i can chill out and knit in my room if you want the living room to yourself” and i was like. “i would Love to chill out in silence with you while we do our own thing”. and she just went. “two only children sitting on different couches wearing noise cancelling headphones doing separate activities” and then we nodded at each other. good hustle gang honestly i'm having a great time

[dissonantharmony]

THE WIKIPEDIA GODS HAVE DECIDED

GÄVLEBOCKEN IS DEAD!! 🦀🦀

[ladybeug]

he was stupid after all...

thats romance.

merry christmas!!!! I was thinking recently I don't just draw for fun very much anymore, so I put some time aside as a christmas gift for me.

[finalhorsegirl]

obsessed with this stupid shirt i found at goodwill the other day

[equalistmako]

every time i listen to “you’re a mean one mr. grinch” i can’t help but sit there and think “what did the grinch do to hurt you?” because dude just stands there for 2 minutes and 58 seconds and drags the grinch into the dirt

[damianmcgintleman]

he stole christmas, kayla! stop with your #notallgrinches propaganda!

[equalistmako]

you know what if someone told me i was a three-decker sauerkraut and toadstool sandwich with arsenic sauce i’d probably be bitter enough to steal christmas too 

[prokopetz]

Interestingly, though The Grinch Who Stole Christmas is narrated by Boris Karloff, the big musical number is sung by the late Thurl Ravenscroft - an American voice actor better known as the voice of Tony the Tiger.

My headcanon is that the Grinch and Tony the Tiger had a bad breakup, and “You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch” is the resulting breakup song.

[snickerslizard]

Did this really HAVE to be the first thing I see when I opened up Tumblr?

[prokopetz]

Yes.

[iguanamouth]

[star-spangled-jackass]

oh god theres art

[tediousfeline]

@altadude you know what must be done.

[altadude-deactivated20190418]

[lesbopsappho]

ive been avoiding reblogging this honestly but just. What the fuck. What the fuck tumblr

[magickspills]

I apologize to all my followers for this

[watfordwallflower]

if i had to read this you do too

[quinintheclouds]

I have a hate-hate relationship with this

[theepitomeofamess]

………

[anony-phangirl]

Good grief… I’m sorry, but I can’t not reblog this…

[broadwaytheanimatedseries]

Tis the season bitches

[theresneverenoughfandoms]

DAMN IT WHY WOULD YOU BRING THIS BACK YOU HEATHEN

[logan-exe]

Why is this on my dash?

[princeanxious]

…..I’m.. Bothered? by the fact that I’m not bothered by this.

[randomslasher]

You’re not bothered?? I’m not only not bothered, I’m freaking invested. I’m having actual empathetic sadness for The Grinch. I want them to go into couple’s counseling. I want the “ten years later” when Tony visits Whoville on business and meets the reformed Grinch whose heart has grown 3 times its usual size. I want them to reminisce over a shared dinner of roast beast and wine, then spend a drunken night together, then realize that maybe things are different and people really do change. I want a 3-act story where there’s a long dark night of soul searching and the realization that maybe we’ve all got a little bit of bad banana with greasy black peel inside us, but that doesn’t mean we can’t make a damned fine banana bread if someone will give us a chance. 

[leethepiper]

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

I’m bringing it back 5 years later, tis the season!

[madronasky]

Oh it’s deeper than that folks. Right @biggest-gaudiest-patronuses ??

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