Daily Dance Break

Because WHY NOT dance for a daily minimum of three minutes?

[owarim]

[ambris]

Please, never let this meme die.

[mapsontheweb]

The most common misspelled searches by US state according to a popular adult website.

[whatyouwanted-whatyougot]

It’s probably because I’m punchy from lack of sleep, but this is HILARIOUS to me.

[dailydancebreak]

Best infographic on the internet?

[lesbiancousin]

*walks up to straight couple* which one of you is the bee and which one of you is the fully grown adult woman who left her fiance for the bee?

[oldfilmsflicker]

Did you get Showtime for TWIN PEAKS? Here are 30 films directed by women that you can watch while you have the service.

Apartment Troubles (dir. Jennifer Prediger, Jess Weixler)

Compared to What: The Improbable Journey of Barney Frank (dir. Sheila Canavan, Michael Chandler)

Cut In Half (dir. Susan Seidelman)

Ginger & Rosa (dir. Sally Potter)

Helicopter Mom (dir. Salomé Breziner)

The Hunters (dir. Nisha Ganatra)

In a Perfect World (dir. Daphne McWilliams)

In My Father’s House (dir. Ricki Stern)

Jackson (dir. Maisie Crow)

Jesus’ Son (dir. Alison Maclean)

L Word Mississippi: Hate The Sin (dir. Lauren Lazin)

The Last Keepers (dir. Maggie Greenwald)

Love The Coopers (dir. Jessie Nelson)

Lucky Numbers (dir. Nora Ephron)

Meru (dir. Jimmy Chin, Elizabeth Chai Vasarhelyi)

Play It Forward (dir. Andrea Blaugrund Nevins)

Prophet’s Prey (dir. Amy Berg)

Richard Pryor: Omit the Logic (dir. Marina Zenovich)

Sleeping with Other People (dir. Leslye Headland)

Song One (dir. Kate Barker-Froyland)

Speak (dir. Jessica Sharzer)

Spring Broke (dir. Alison Ellwood)

Stander (dir. Bronwen Hughes)

Street Dance Family (dir. Debbie Shuter, Adam Tysoe)

Tiny Furniture (dir. Lena Dunham)

Walking on Sunshine (dir. Max Giwa, Dania Pasquini)

Walter (dir. Anna Mastro)

What Women Want (dir. Nancy Meyers)

Weiner (dir. Josh Kriegman, Elyse Steinberg)

Wish You Well (dir. Darnell Martin)

[fuckyeahdevanand]

I am feel uncomfortable when not about me?

[oldfilmsflicker]

how is that caption relevant?

[fuckyeahdevanand]

Read the first sentence of your title again.

[oldfilmsflicker]

It’s literally a list of films directed by women on Showtime so that people who just got Showtime for Twin Peaks and also want to watch films by women don’t have to search. If that doesn’t include you, this list is not for you. Who’s uncomfortable with things not being about them???

[fuckyeahdevanand]

You are.  And you proved it with this reply.  They bought Showtime for Twin Peaks.  They probably don’t give one less iota of a ratshit about female film directors.

[oldfilmsflicker]

[dailydancebreak]

Thanks for compiling this list. I've basically been looking for posts like this, i.e. "While you have Showtime, check out..." I'm psyched to go through a lot of these in the next month! 😁

[kingjaffejoffer]

Boss shit

[lady-feral]

Literal actual goals

[argumate]

that was intensely satisfying

[artisansoulleader]

Magnificent!😃😃😃😃

[salivadripping]

Ferrari F355 Berlinetta (by Olivers Travels)

[lightspeedsound]

I thought this was s close up of a vacuum cleaner

[dailydancebreak]

I thought it was the top of a litter box. A fancy litter box. 

[roxanegay]

What made you want to be a Professor? :)

A paycheck.

[dailydancebreak]

Roxane Gay SLAYED answer time. How can answers so full of good ideas and good recommendations and good jokes also be so fucking succinct. I mean, they are tight! Each one is like watching someone sink a basket. Swoosh! Swoosh! Swoosh! Slamdunk! I wish I had them printed in a little book I could flip through every night. 

[sequinedably]

one of my students uses the bechdel test in their paper but they kind of mis-explain what we can conclude from it, so the nitpick in me wants to politely add nuance but the kind person in me feels like maybe I should just leave it given that this is most advanced thing anyone is saying in their papers (and I think this student sees themself, not entirely incorrectly, as the best attuned person in the class to gender issues, so I don’t want to be adversarial to someone who really needs allies in this good fight) please advise

[dailydancebreak]

I would affirm, offer extensive information on the actual source and context of the Bechdel Test (I'm assuming the student gleaned it from tumblr/social media without any context or specific citation, and maybe hasn't even seen the comic strip or know the names of the characters), explain the need for nuance, and then recommend Fun Home to the student. And they probably would never read the feedback, but I'd feel equally righteous and counterproductive, and that's the borderland I like to occupy.

[roughhewnends]

ok but what if you married whomever was on your *phone* background

[screamyvegetables]

I don’t think it’s possible to marry a city street.

[whatyouwanted-whatyougot]

I’ve never wanted to be married, but I could do a lot worse.

[dailydancebreak]

i feel like i’m gonna win this ^^^

[chessys]

i have some issues with my past self but she was young and i forgive her my real beef is with present me what is she doing im embarrassed to even look

[fromgreecetoanarchy]

[d-lightfulexcess]

This is the punkest thing I have ever seen in my whole life.

[dailydancebreak]

(Xiu Xiu)

[cl-hilbert]

A Tasting Menu of Female Representation:

The Bechdel:

two or more women talking to each other about something other than a man

The Mako Mori:

at least one female character with her own narrative arc that is not about supporting a man’s story

The Sexy Lamp:

a female character that cannot be removed from the plot and replaced with a sexy lamp without destroying the story.

Chef’s Specials:

The Anti-Freeze:

no woman assaulted, injured or killed to further the story of another character.

The “Strength is Relative”:

complex women defined by solid characterization rather than a handful of underdeveloped masculine-coded stereotypes.

[priscellie]

[thisisrabbit]

Furiosa test.

[fuckyeahfeminist]

^^

[jankoraven]

ALL OF THE ABOVE 

[dailydancebreak]

[metalbatteryzone]

Being in a mid-2000s High School Health class and they show you this on DVD

[furlockhound-inactive-moved-dea]

Didn’t that turn out to be a load of bullshit that no-one can replicate the results of to this day?

[theswedishelf]

Yep! His results were faked, and the entire film was basically anti-McDonald’s scaremongering, “poor people are stupid” and “fat people don’t get any sex”. It’s also thanks to this asshat that McDonald’s can’t advertise fuckin’ Happy Meals anymore and had to get rid of all their characters and their super size option, particularly because he claimed without evidence that they have a kid-fattening agenda, don’t list their nutritional info anywhere and have a mission statement from their CEO to make people sick and unhealthy from eating there for every single meal. On top of this, he actually tried to claim in a bonus experiment that McDonald’s fries aren’t actually fries because they don’t rot when left in an airtight container for a long time but all the burgers do–which is thanks to the oil and salt they’re loaded with, not some big conspiracy where the fries, which are processed and supplied by McCain in Canada, aren’t actually goddamn chopped potatoes–and equated the containers to a human stomach. Yes, cause the human stomach is an airtight container that food sits in for months, right? Spurlock, did veganism turn your brain completely off or something? Hell, the fucker even tried to claim credit for McDonald’s having salads, falsely stating at one point they didn’t have any before he “exposed” their EVIL PLANS.

Yeah, that’s another thing to remember, he’s apparently a vegan. He didn’t let anyone know he’s one, of course, he only mentioned his girlfriend is one, because it would’ve made his vomiting after a single McDonald’s meal, something literally no one else on the planet has done, seem less ZOMG SCARY.

Want a good film of this nature? Try Tom Naughton’s Fat Head instead, a film where a guy actively proves Spurlock wrong by actually losing weight while eating nothing but fast food for a month. He accomplishes this by NOT fucking gorging himself on the unhealthiest food choices, eating more meals than he claims or cutting out his usual physical activity. While he’s at it, he also exposes exactly why Spurlock is a total fraud. In the process, he gets actual doctors and nutrition experts to help him explain why everything you know about healthy eating is probably wrong or half-true, inform us about good and bad cholesterol, expose the real reasons behind the so-called “obesity epidemic” and point out why fat =/= unhealthy by default. Yeah, Naughton encourages viewers to try the paleo diet in the end, but at least it comes off more as a suggestion and doesn’t demonize anyone in the process.

[danguy96]

Wait, so this guy is part of the reason why we don’t see things like McDonaldland anymore, and why we only see characters like Ronald anymore, and are even lucky if we catch an appearance from Grimace or Hamburglar anymore? Well, if that’s the case, I officially consider him a douche because I loved McDonaldland growing up, even if I was introduced to it via that series of tapes The Wacky Adventures of Ronald McDonald.

[dxscostick-deactivated20170429]

He’s a FUCKING MCDOUCHE AND WE GOTTA MCFREAKIN BURN HIM AT THE MCSTAKE

[ro-s-a-spark-s]

I never knew any of this and I’m really, really sad. Not because I Stan Morgan Spurlock. But because I’m just so fucking done with moralizing people’s food choices, especially vegans. You like green food and don’t do dairy or animal products? Good, FINE. (And I don’t even want to get into financial resources and food access, etc…)

But VEGANS are not better than anyone else, ever. And if you take that platform and throw yourself up above on that pedestal over other people?

YOU ARE A FUCKING ASSHOLE. AND GO FUCK YOURSELF.

In my personal moral code? I refuse to look down on other people for their choices because I don’t want to be A FUCKING ASSHOLE. Because being a fucking asshole is way worse than feeling smug because you eat lettuce wraps full of fresh tomatoes and bullshit.

Go fuck yourself, Morgan Spurlock.

[dailydancebreak]

Nah, fuck fucking McDonalds. Nobody has to praise Spurlock's stunt, but in the documentary he enjoys eating food from McDonalds, and his partner is a clear part of the film, and she's a vegan chef, and he's *not* a vegan. These are just bs anti-vegan posts (with a hint of paleo self-righteousness) from people who grew up in a world where it seemed hip to criticize McDonalds, and now they think he's the fraud. McDonalds is not exclusively some benevolent corporation that makes up cute corporate-sponsored characters like the Hamburglar. Spurlock doesn't shame the people who eat at McDonalds. Fuck, he barely shames the corporation that poisons them.

[pchcrew]

how to be a winner

[bambi---eyes-deactivated2017110]

This is so important

[sweeettsugar-deactivated2016061]

bruh 👏🏾😂.

[ashweenis]

ranessence tantrummm

[2opinionatedblackgirls]

That discussion board one actually works. Got an A in that portion of my Senior Sem doing that. This is gold.

[pharaohmangos-deactivated201801]

🔑🔑🔑

[pchcrew]

hahaha wow remember this

[felixfirecrotchwalken]

This advice doesn’t really apply to majors like math or science though…highly doubt you can just “cruise by” when it comes to labs…

[brutallyhonestbeauty]

Or: How to Get a College Degree without Learning Anything by Behaving like a Sociopath

[whatyouwanted-whatyougot]

Totally, TOTALLY do all this shit, these “clever” “hacks,” kids. They TOTALLY work, 99.9% of the time! Except when your professor is an asshole, because they’re clearly either assholes (.01%) or FUCKING IDIOTS (99.9%).

So, sure, “hack” your $100,000 “education.” You sure put one over on Ol’ Professor Poindexter! Ha! Ha! Priceless, brah! You’re clearly a genius; why even bother with higher ed?

Or you could just show up, do the work, and fucking learn something, you smarmy little fraud.

[dailydancebreak]

I'm so glad other professors started to chew this up before I saw it. At least there's some justice in the commentary.

Also, I would love forever the student who ruins their life by changing their ringtone to a xiu xiu song to please me.

[galagalactic]

Octavia Butler. “So be it! See to it!” Futuristic Witch Spell.

[annfriedman]

The Roe v. Pie

[dailydancebreak]

“Life begins at contraception!” YES! I would gladly wear a sandwich board with this slogan.